A/N
Some of this (mostly the lists) is taken out of my own journals, obviously not anything involving Harry Potter characters, as that would be weird.

*Notes Passed in History of Magic*

Ron: Hermione, why aren’t you taking notes?

Hermione: Professor Binns gave us this lecture yesterday! I already have notes on it!

Ron: Are you sure?

Hermione: Of course I’m sure, I pay attention, remember?

Ron: Right, you have no life, I forgot.

*An Excerpt from Hermione’s Journal*
History of Magic, 9:35
I am sick and tired of hearing that I HAVE NO LIFE! You people won’t let me have a life! I blame society! Is it really a crime to want to do well in school? Oh sorry, I actually want a good job and would like to make a little bit of money so I don’t have to live with my parents. Sorry.

Think about it, if Ron thinks I have no life, then that means that he’s obviously not desperately in love with me. I practically spent the whole period gazing longingly at his gorgeous blue eyes and messy hair (I didn’t have to take notes so I had some free time, remember?) I don’t know how much longer I can take this. If he doesn’t show signs of interest in me, then I’m giving up. I’ll…become a lesbian or something (Ok, so I won’t go that far.)

Still History of Magic, 9:50
Ron is looking at Parvati. I think I might die.

9:53
Parvati asked him something, and he laughed. I broke the tip of my quill. I give up on him.

*Notes Passed in Transfiguration*

From Harry:
Harry: What page are we on?

Hermione: 54

Harry: Thanks

From Ron:
Ron: What page are we on?

Hermione: 54

Ron: I need to talk to you after of class.

Hermione: Ok

Transfiguration, 10:13
Ok, so I’m not going to give up just yet. I’ll decide whether or not it’s time to give up on Ron after this mystery meeting. Who knows what could happen? (grins maniacally). This could be when he finally confesses his undying affection for me! Though, the last time he pulled me aside, it was to tell me that he’d accidentally sent his potions essay to Peru and he needed my help rewriting it (I was skeptical about the Peru thing).

Merlin, this class is boring. I mean, transfiguring things is fun, but now McGonnagall is just rambling about the dangers of incorrectly vanishing a moose. Why would I ever want to vanish a moose? I need something to amuse myself with.

10:18
THINGS THAT ANNOY ME

1.) The fact that this, and several other of my classes, are so incredibly boring that it makes me want to cry.

2.) The fact that certain people can get away with not doing their homework, but I can’t.

3.) When someone asks me a question, but then someone else answers for me. ERR! I can speak for myself, in case you haven’t noticed!

4.) When I get called perfect. Hellooo? I do have problems too, you know.

5.) The fact that I get hungry twenty minutes after I finish eating breakfast.

6.) The fact that I constantly help Ron and get him out of trouble, yet he continues to be awful to me.

7.) When I put my quill down and then, seconds later, it disappears.

8.) The fact that TIME IS GOING SO MIND-NUMBINGLY SLOW!

*An Excerpt from Ginny’s Journal*

Omigosh, I just saw my brother pull Hermione aside after they left transfiguration. Is he finally asking her out? He’s so stupid, I mean, he knows he likes her but he just won’t DO anything about it! Uugh, it’s all so stupid.

This is so incredibly random, but I haven’t seen Mrs. Norris in a while. I usually pass her on my way to Herbology and she hisses at me, but lately she’s been conspicuously absent. Not that I mind. It’s a nice change.

*Hermione’s Journal*
Herbology, 10:40
This is it. I finally give up.

Ok, Ron pulls me aside and says, “Hermione, I need to tell you something.�

Of course I get all exited – I thought he was telling me something serious – so I nonchalantly replied, “Go ahead. I’m listening.� I then leaned casually against the wall and began to fuss with my hair.

“I’ve been hiding this from you for a while,� he went on. “Have you noticed that Mrs. Norris has been missing lately?�

I nodded.

“Well,� he continued, “she’s not here because…because I turned her into a duck and she ran away into the Forbidden Forest.�

“ARE YOU INSANE!� I bellowed. He then proceeded to tell me a rather interesting story involving three eggs, Hagrid, and a tie that was too small (it was kind-of long, so I won’t write it all here). After it was done, I was (and still am, by the way), absolutely LIVID.

“So will you help me find her?� he asked me. “Or are you too busy having no life?�

That was it. I stormed away and haven’t spoken to him since.

Lunch – 12:06
REASONS WHY I AM LIVID

1.) Ron doesn’t really like me, and only hangs around me because he needs me to help him

2.) I have a really bad headache, and nothing is making it go away

3.) My sandwich tastes like catfood

4.) Ron is now talking to Parvati, who keeps touching him and giggling

5.) Harry is too dumb to realize anything’s wrong

6.) I just spilled pumpkin juice down my shirt. Great.

7.) I caught a glance of myself in a mirror and realized that my hair was absolutely frightening…more frightening than usual that is

8.) Ron is smiling at Parvati

9.) My Herbology homework is nowhere to be found

10.) Ron is HUGGING Parvati

11.) I found my Herbology homework. Harry is using it as a napkin.

Right after Herbology, 3:00
I don’t know what I was thinking.

I was still fuming mad, ready to tear Ron’s head off, when he comes up to me and pulls me aside once again.

“Look,� he told me. “I’m sorry I keep bothering you, but I really need your help with this Mrs. Norris thing.�

I was determined not to let him talk me into anything. “I’m not helping you. I’m always doing you favors and you show me no appreciation,� I said coolly. I felt SO GOOD about myself right then. Too bad it didn’t last long.

“Please Hermione,� he begged, putting his hand on my shoulder. “I need you.� He gazed at me with his irritatingly amazing eyes.

Well what’d you think I did? “You don’t need me! You’re always making fun of me and never do anything to help me! I DON’T KNOW WHY I’M ALWAYS DOING THINGS FOR YOU! �

That’s what I should’ve said.

“Of course I’ll help you,� is what I really said.

AND, to make things even worse, as I was walking away I saw Ron and Parvati sneak off into an empty classroom. I waited outside for FIVE MINUTES, but they didn’t come out. I would’ve stayed longer, but my back was beginning to hurt from the weight of my backpack and I REALLY had to go to the bathroom. So I have no idea how long they were in there. Or what they did. Or how he feels about her. Or where the hell Mrs. Norris is.

I hate everyone.

A/N: (writing this long after this story was completed) Funny, I remember when I wrote this...right before I went out somewhere...if I'd only known what was going to happen that night...(ooh, so enigmatic!) But anyway, this was my first fanfiction, written completely stream-of-counciousness...in case you care. And even though this story is completed, it's still nice to review!

***Author’s note – I got many reviews begging me to update. Unfortunately, I am very much like Hermione and have tons of homework (darn AP classes!), so I don’t have a lot of time.

*An excerpt from Hermione’s journal*
Saturday, at breakfast

REASONS WHY I AM INCREDIBLY IRKED RIGHT NOW

1.) Ron is sneaking off with Parvati

2.) I just found out that Professor McGonnagall assigned an essay…on the dangers of incorrectly vanishing a moose. If you go back to one of my previous entries, you’ll notice that I was writing another one of these dumb lists while she was telling the class about said dangers. Vanishing a moose…why don’t they teach us something useful for a change?

3.) I have NO IDEA how I’m going to help Ron find Mrs. Norris, the duck

4.) I have NO IDEA why I AGREED to help Ron find Mrs. Norris, the duck

5.) I have an unusual red blotch on my cheek and cannot seem to cover it up

6.) My Potions essay is done, but when I re-read it, I realized that it makes no sense. I wrote a bunch of long sentences that sound intelligent, but when you stop and think about them, you realize that they’re not really saying anything. Oh well. Maybe Snape won’t notice. He never has before.

7.) My foot itches

8.) Ron is trying to read what I’m writing, and quite frankly, I DO NOT want him to see any of this

10:00 – A Recent Conversation

Hermione: I overheard Parvati talking to Lavender about you this morning

Ron: Yeah, I talked to her yesterday

Hermione: About what?

Ron: Stuff

Hermione: What kind of stuff?

Ron: Why do you care?

Hermione: She was saying some interesting things about you – I’m curious!

Ron: She asked me about Divination homework

Hermione: Oh?

Ron: Are you going to look up the information for that charms worksheet? I need it!

Hermione: Do your own work for once!

Ron: I don’t know how!

Hermione: Well learn! IT WON’T KILL YOU!

*Hermione’s Journal*
11:47
I have no luck.

Harry, Ron, and I were having lunch at Hagrid’s – I was arguing with Ron over one of Flitwick’s assignments. I had already finished half of it, but Ron hadn’t even started. It wasn’t this that bothered me, it was the fact that he had NO INTENTIONS OF DOING IT that made me mad.

“Why should I waste my time writing out this assignment,� he said, “when I can just get the answers from you?�

For once, I actually gave him an answer that I don’t regret now: “Open a book for once! It won’t kill you!�

We continued arguing – I hate arguing – until Harry finally told us he was sick of it and was leaving. I was sick of it too, so I followed him out of Hagrid’s hut with all intentions of heading back up to the castle. However, my plans changed when I spotted a fat duck waddling out of the forest.

“Ron! It’s Mrs. Norris!� I exclaimed. This was a dumb idea, as it scared the duck away.

This was when the fun began. After Mrs. Norris the duck had calmed down, I slowly followed behind her, waiting for the right moment to strike. I was concentrating so hard that it was frightening. I was almost directly over her when I heard Ron come up behind me. To put this nicely, he’s not exactly the most inconspicuous person, so naturally he scared Mrs. Norris away.

I don’t know what exactly I intended to accomplish by this, but I began to chase after her, screaming like a madwoman (I haven’t a clue why I was screaming. It seemed like a good idea at the time). Luckily she didn’t head too far into the forest but instead, swerved around back towards the school, so I didn’t have to run around in there. However, I still must’ve looked pretty ridiculous chasing around an angry duck, screaming like I was getting my arm cut off.

Unbelievably enough, I caught the duck. However, she was not happy about this. She squawked and squirmed in my arms, getting a large amount of feathers in my mouth (and they do NOT taste good, let me tell you.) I knew I couldn’t hold on for much longer, so I threw her in Hagrid’s hut.

Ron, I thought, would be so happy. At that moment, I felt so proud.

Until about thirty seconds later.

Ron approached me. Our conversation went as follows:

Me- I caught Mrs. Norris!

Ron- No you didn’t.

Me- ………..what do you mean………….

Ron- That wasn’t Mrs. Norris.

Me- …………..

Ron- That was just some random duck.

I just walked away.

4:08, The common Room
I borrowed Ron’s book for a minute and found this note inside of it. I give up on life. I quit. I wrote a copy of it in here:

Ron,
Meet me tomorrow in the transfiguration classroom during lunch. Come alone.
Parvati

Well, there’s obviously one solution for this. I, of course, will find some reason to be in the transfiguration room at lunch…unless I chicken out…or unless I think of another solution…Parvati must die…no, that’s a horrible thing to write, she’s not that bad…I NEED TO DO MY HOMEWORK!

4:15
I’m doing my homework, I swear. I’m just taking another break.

4:18
I have been sitting here staring at my charms worksheet, yet it refuses to let me finish it.

4:30
Harry just told me we have a Herbology test on Monday. I did not know this. So now, I have this stupid charms worksheet to finish AND a test to study for. The teachers are trying to kill us.

4:34
Maybe I shouldn’t go to the transfiguration room tomorrow. I mean, I already embarrassed myself enough by chasing some random duck around today (why didn’t I just use MAGIC to catch it?) Still…I could make it look like an accident…though by the way things are going now, I might have to do some of this homework at lunch tomorrow. (sigh) Honestly, I think that sometimes, the teachers all get together and conspire against us.

THINGS THAT CONFUSE ME

1.) My charms worksheet

2.) Ron Weasley

3.) The fact that no matter how much I eat at breakfast, I am always hungry twenty minutes later.

4.) The fact that no matter how much homework I do, it never ends

5.) Ron turned Mrs. Norris into a duck. Think about that for a minute

6.) The fact that I spent forever doing my potions essay, yet it makes no sense.

7.) The vanilla pudding that they served at lunch earlier

8.) Ron Weasley ( he deserves to be on here twice)

I’ve decided. Tomorrow at lunch, I’ll be in that transfiguration classroom. There is no way Parvati is making a move on Ron. I will be at that little meeting, and nothing, NOTHING, is going to stop me!

(famous last words…)

A/N: First of all, I realized that I should give credit to J.K. Rowling, as all the characters and other such things are from her imagination, not mine, as I am not that amazing. Second of all, this seems a little short to me, but when I tried to make it longer it felt forced.

12:30 Lunch
Well, I did it. I crashed Parvati and Ron’s meeting. I can’t write about it now, I’m having a heart attack…I feel another list coming.

THINGS THAT MAKE A CLASS UNBEARABLE
(This is completely random. I am writing it to calm myself down.)

1.) A teacher that talks in monotone

2.) The subject that you’re learning is something completely stupid or boring, like goblin treaties or ways to change the color of a quill.

3.) The person who sits behind you is bored and amuses HIMSELF by harassing you – pulling your hair, doing artwork on the back of your shirt, throwing things at you, moving around your chair, stealing things from you etc etc (A/N: hmm…could I be making a reference to someone?)

4.) Homework that doesn’t seem to end no matter how much time you spend on it

5.) Topics that make no sense

6.) Teachers who make random analogies that only confuse you more than you already are

7.) When you’re REALLY hungry during class

1:30
Ok, here’s everything that happened in the transfiguration room at lunch.

Harry and I were walking down to the Great Hall when I gasp, “Oh no, I’ve left my transfiguration book in the classroom! I have to go back and get it!�

So Harry says, “Ok, I’ll come with you.�

“That’s Ok,� I quickly reply. “I can go by myself.�

Thankfully he was hungry, so he let me go off alone. By the time I reached the door to the classroom I was having a complete panic attack, but some unseen force compelled me to enter anyway. For a moment, I thought that the room was empty, until I saw Ron messing with some of the things on McGonagall desk.

“Hey,� he said to me. “What’re you doing here?�

“I left my book in here,� I replied. It was true; earlier in the day I had accidentally/on purpose left my book on a table. “What’re you doing here?�

“Parvati asked me to meet her here,� he told me (I acted surprised.) “She’s been acting so weird around me lately. I mean, she keeps pulling me aside at weird times and acting all…weird. It’s like…weird!�

Though I was cringing on the outside from Ron’s repeated use of the word “weird�, on the inside I was singing. Ron didn’t like Parvati. If he had, he would’ve noticed all the obvious hints she was giving him.

“Yeah, that is weird,� I casually replied. I intended to take forever to find my book (though it was sitting in plain sight on a table), but Ron sighted it first.

“Hey, there’s your book!�

I sighed and picked it up. “I’ll get out of here now.�

What happened next made me want to dance.

“Hermione,� Ron said. “I really don’t like Parvati. I know this might sound weird to you, and this is a really bizarre time to tell you, but I’m desperately in love with you. Please go out with me! I’ll go crazy without you!�

Ok, I’m kidding.

But he did say this. “Hey Hermione, will you wait with me until Parvati gets here?�

So I waited. We talked and laughed for a while, joking about stupid things, until I heard the door open behind me. Sighing, I turned around and found myself face to face with none other than DUDLEY DURSELY!

Kidding again. It was Parvati.

“Hermione?� she spat. “What are you doing here?�

I felt so triumphant. This was obviously not what she expected. “I left my book here.�

She then gave me a look. You know what kind of look I mean. The kind of look that one girl gives to another girl that communicates the point “stay away from my boyfriend/love interest or I will make sure you have a very miserable life� without using words. Let me tell you, she is FRIGHTENINGLY good at it.

Ron, luckily, ruined the moment by saying to her, “Yeah, so, why did you want to see me here?�

Parvati was thoroughly annoyed. “I wanted to talk to you…alone.� She shot me another evil look.

“Ok then,� he turned to me. “Can you leave? I have to talk to Parvati. I won’t take long. I’m really hungry.�

I felt so triumphant…again. I had completely ruined Parvati’s plan. (Wow, there’s a lot of planning going on around here now that I think about it.) I was about to leave the room when someone else entered it: Harry’s neighbor, MRS. FIGG!

For a third time, I am kidding.

It was Filch, and he looked livid.

“Well, well,� he snickered. “What do we have here?� It was then when I realized that I was out of bounds – all of us were. We weren’t allowed to be alone in an empty classroom! WHAT WAS I THINKING?

He gave us all detention tomorrow night. I can’t believe it!

4:01

REASONS WHY I AM LIVID RIGHT NOW

1.) My homework has no end

2.) I have no idea what is going on in Potions, but am doing a good job of pretending to know what I’m doing

3.) I have detention tomorrow night with Ron and Parvati. Oh, that will be fun

4.) Parvati wants to kill me now, for getting in between her and Ron

5.) Filch is ridiculously close to finding out that Ron is behind Mrs. Norris’ mysterious disappearance and I’m sure if he does, Ron’ll find a way to blame me

6.) I am realizing how much time I’ve spent thinking about Ron. What am I doing? I’M WASTING MY LIFE!

7.) There is a very ugly, suspicious looking bug crawling towards me and I am too livid to move away from it

8.) I’m hungry. All right, this isn’t making me livid, but it’s not improving my mood either

9.) Ron turned Mrs. Norris into a duck, yet somehow I will end up getting in trouble for it

10.) I lost track of the very ugly, suspicious looking bug…

4:30, The Hospital Wing
Well, turns out that the very ugly, suspicious looking bug was a rare poisonous snapping zhibkhit. It bit my ankle. I couldn’t walk. Ron had to carry me to Madam Pomfrey.

This day just keeps getting better, doesn’t it?

5:57
I just got a note informing me of the details of my detention tomorrow. I’ll be serving it with none other than my favorite teacher, Professor Snape. Horray.

Fate is not being good to me now.

**Pre-detention, time unknown because my watch has died

*GOOD THINGS RIGHT NOW*

1.) I did well on my Herbology test today.

2.) My homework is finished so I actually have some free time (when does THAT happen?).

3.) Ron does not like Parvati.

4.) I have no major tests to study for right now (a rare and precious thing!)

5.) I am eating chocolate right now, and it is incredibly good.

6.) Neither Ron nor Harry has asked me to help them with their homework, giving me even more free time! Yay!

*BAD THINGS*

1.) My ankle is still swollen from my encounter with that poisonous snapping zhibkhit.

2.) No one, not even Dumbledore, knows how a poisonous snapping zhibkhit got into Hogwarts. This cannot be a good thing.

3.) I lost my homework planner. My life is a disorganized mess. WHERE COULD IT POSSIBLY BE?

4.) I have detention tonight. With Snape.

Hmm … for once the good things seem to outnumber the bad things. Foreshadowing, I hope?

Now that I think of it, detention with Snape probably won’t be that bad. He’ll probably just make us sit quietly and stay out of his way, meaning that Parvati won’t have time to say anything to me. Now that I’ve written that thought down, I have no doubt it will be proven wrong, for that is the way that my life works.

**Still Pre-detention, but a little later

I just got a note telling me to bring a coat to my detention, as we will be going outside. So much for sitting quietly (*sigh*). I hope we don’t have to walk much, because my ankle is NOT happy right now … because my ankle has feelings and every thing, you know. Poisonous snapping zhibkhit … this could only happen to me.

I should get going now. Wish me luck (because inanimate objects such as journals can do that, you know … )

**Post detention

Wow.

I’ll start from the beginning.

My detention group included the most random collection of people: Parvati, Dennis Creevy, Goyle, Zacharias Smith, Ron, and (obviously) me. I couldn’t imagine why we would be going outside -- it seemed like a rather un-Snape-ish thing for detention. However, when Snape entered the room accompanied by Filch, I had a feeling I knew what we’d be doing.

“For your detention,� Snape began, “Mr. Filch here has requested that you aid him in his search for his pet. You will be going into the Forbidden Forest to look for her.�

Ron and I quickly exchanged looks. It didn’t seem as though Filch suspected us, but we didn’t say anything in front of them, just in case. He did whisper to me as Snape led us out of the room.

“What if we find her?� he asked.

I stared at him blankly.

“She’s a duck, remember! We know that, but they don’t! If we catch her, they’ll know we had something to do with this because there’d be no other way we would know she’d been turned into a duck!�

I paused and tried to make sense of this. “You’re right,� I eventually replied (this is not something I normally say to Ron -- since when does he make sense?).

“If we find her, we have to change her back without anyone else noticing!� he went on.

I nodded. (Since when did Ron think up good, logical ideas? I thought that was my job!)

Once we reached the edge of the forest, Filch gave us the most vague instructions I’ve ever received: “Just … go in there.� Normally when a teacher or someone brings us into the Forbidden Forest, they give strict instructions because of the dangerous nature of it. Neither Filch nor Snape seemed to care for our welfare.

This suited me fine, because it gave Ron and me some time to search alone.

Meaning I was alone with Ron.

But we had to look for Mrs. Norris.

“What if we don’t find her?� I worried to him.

He thought for a moment. “Actually, that wouldn’t be that bad.�

Though this was true, I had to bring up another point. “If we don’t find her, Filch might figure out that it’s your fault she’s missing!�

“Eh, oh well.�

I was about to say something else, until I felt someone shove me to the side. Snapping my head around, I discovered that the person who pushed me was none other than … PETER PETTIGREW!

Kidding. It was Parvati.

“Have you found her yet?� she asked in an annoyingly girlish voice (why won’t she GIVE UP ALREADY!)

“If we’d found her,� I replied coolly, “do you think we’d still be looking?�

She shot me a look. I did not comment however, for I had spotted a duck waddling in the distance.

What do you think I did?

(A) Ran after her, screaming like a madwoman

(B) Sat back and watched as Ron ran after her, screaming like a madwoman, er, madman

(C) Ran with Ron as we both chased after her, screaming like mad ... people

(D) Thought to myself, “What’s a duck doing in the Forbidden Forest?�

Think for a moment
*
*
*
*
*
Ok, there are two correct answers. At first I (D) thought to myself, “What’s a duck doing in the Forbidden Forest?� until I came to my senses and (C) ran with Ron as we both chased after her, leaving Parvati behind, screaming like mad … people. My ankle was killing me, but I didn’t care. Again I have no idea why we were screaming, though it did seem like a good idea at the time.

Amazingly enough, we caught her … well, Ron did. He did this spectacular sort of dive thing and landed on top of her, pinning her to the ground.

“Change her back!� he called to me.

I quickly blurted the correct spell (I have no idea how I knew what the correct spell was) and the struggling duck instantly changed into a struggling cat. I was about to tell Ron to let her go, until a thought crossed my mind.

“Ron, we can’t bring her back to Filch!�

“What’dya mean we can’t?� he demanded.

“Filch and Mrs. Norris have that whole … secret language thing! They can communicate with each other! THE MAN SPEAKS CAT!�

He stared at me blankly.

“Mrs. Norris’ll tell Filch that YOU turned her into a duck!�

He seemed to understand. “We’ve got to modify her memory.� Again, I was shocked by Ron’s good idea.

I was about to cast the spell, when I heard footsteps behind me. Spinning around I saw Snape, Filch, and the rest of the detention gang racing toward us.

I intended to shout: “Obliviate!�

I accidentally shouted: “Ob-bliviate!�

Ron released the cat.

At first all seemed well. Mrs. Norris raced over to Filch and he began to kiss her passionately (yeeeeeesh! *Shudder, shudder*). Their “moment� did not last long, however. After he was done cuddling her, Filch asked her what had happened.

She meowed. He nodded in agreement.

“So he turned you into a duck, is that right love?�

I felt my stomach lurch. Mrs. Norris meowed again.

“Ah, I see.�

Ron looked sick. I thought he was done for, until Filch began to talk.

“Well,� he began. “My pretty here has just told me a rather interesting story. According to her, Mr. Goyle here turned her into a duck and chased her into this horrible forest! And THEN, he changed her back and tried to modify her memory, but she got away!� He turned to Goyle. “Oh, someone’s in trouble now, aren’t they?�

I wanted to sing, but decided that if I did it would look incredibly suspicious.

Later, things got even better. As Ron and I returned to the common room, he randomly broke out into a bizarre little jig. I immediately begged him to stop and asked him what in the name of Merlin he was doing.

“I got away with this! We changed her back! We’re not in trouble!� he sang. “This is amazing! I love you!�

And then he kissed me.

Seriously.

I will admit, I was INCREDIBLY confused, but did not complain.

YESYESYESYESYES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

NOT The end!

A/N: I originally ended it here and then thought to myself, "Wow...that was a dumb idea" so I posted a sequel which picks up basically where this leaves off: "Oh the Insanity - The Thoughts of Hermione Granger". Please read! I have more fics up, better than this, if you want to read.This was my very first fanfiction by the way *sniff*!