Draco sighed deeply as he stared out of his dormitory window, not really seeing anything. He knew she would find someone else sooner or later. He had just hoped it would be really later, so that he wasn’t around to see it.

Draco had been sat at the Slytherin table eating dinner when she entered the Great Hall, arms around Golden Boy’s waist. He couldn’t bear to think of Ginny, his Ginny, with pretty-boy Potter.

He violently jabbed the play button on his magical stereo, trying to force the image of Ginny’s face looking animatedly up at Potter’s, her eyes sparkling and alive with laughter. She used to look at me that way, Draco thought reminiscently.


When the time comes near
For me to show my love
The longer I stayed away for,
Hiding from a world I need to hear now,
Don’t think I’ll hear it again.


The words of the song invaded Draco’s mind. He really did need Ginny now, he always had. Sometimes the only thing that got him through the day was knowing he would be with her that night. His father was once again forcing him to make a decision about his future. Of course, Draco had already made it; now he knew what it was like to feel the light he was never going back to the dark. He would never become a death eater. It was just how to tell his father all this and survive doing so.


But the nights are always warm with you
Holding you right by my side,
But the morning always comes too soon
Before I even close my eyes.


It was true; whenever the youngest Weasley was next to him nothing else mattered, nothing else even existed. She was his one escape from this hell that was being a Malfoy.

All I do each night is pray,
Hoping that I’ll be a part of you again some day.
All I do is night is think
Of all the times I closed the door to keep my love within.

When they’d split up, if that’s what you could call it, Draco felt as if a part of him had been ripped away. Ginny had been, and still was really, a part of his soul. He had no way of knowing if this was mutual, she hadn’t spoken to him for months. It was true that he’d not let his strength of feeling truly show whilst they were together. But it had been to protect her. Draco knew how dangerous a position their relationship put Ginny in. If his father knew his son was completely in love with a Weasley, well, Draco never cared to consider what he would do.


If you can’t forgive the past
I’ll understand that.
Can’t understand why I did this to you.
And all of the days and the nights so I regret it,
I never showed you my love.


She would never forgive him. And she would never understand what he’d done. Because he couldn’t tell her.

*flashback*

“I love you Ginevra Weasley.” Draco whispered and kissed her gently before she retreated around the corner, heading back to Gryffindor Tower. Slowly, he turned around to make his own way back to the dungeons, but blocking his way was Blaise Zabini emerging from behind a statue of Merlin, a disgusted look on his face.

“What did you just say?” he asked incredulously. “How can you love a filthy muggle-lover like her?”

The words made Draco’s blood boil. He could feel that dangerous pink tinge begin to spread across his creamy pale face. He glared at his fellow Slytherin, fighting desperately the instinct telling him to beat Zabini to a pulp.

“I don’t you idiot.” He replied, forcing the words from his mouth, bile rising in his throat as he did. If another Slytherin found out just how serious he was about Ginny, it was only a matter of time before his father found out. Draco couldn’t let that happen. She would be too easy to use as bait to force him to become a death eater. “But,” he continued steadily, “I’ve gotta get some from somewhere, haven’t I?” Draco smirked at his so-called friend. He felt sick. Zabini seemed satisfied and smirked back, clapping him on the shoulder, as if in congratulations.

However, a low sound made him spin around. Ginny had reappeared, her beautiful caramel eyes wide and glistening with tears, her whole faced etched with heartache and disbelief.

*end flashback*


But the nights were always warm with you,
Holding you right by my side.
But the morning always comes too soon,
Before I even close my eyes.


Her face at that moment haunted him every night. Draco often woke up in a cold sweat, tears cascading down his front. If only he’d gone after her, explained everything…things would be so different, he would be so different. But, he reminded himself forcefully, it’s better for her this way. That was what he found hard to accept, even though he knew it was true.


All I do each night is pray,
Hoping that I’ll be a part of you again some day.
All I do each night is think,
Of all the times I closed the door to keep my love within.


Where once the touch of her velvety skin under his fingers and the warmth and sweetness of her mouth on his had been Draco’s release and escape, now he dreamt of her. Dreamt of their past together, dreamt of a future they would never have, always silently praying anyway.

At least she was happy now. That was what was important. Even if it was with scar-head. He couldn’t bear to see her sorrow, especially when he knew he was the cause of it. He had to be happy for her. But that wouldn’t stop Draco dreaming, and wishing, and praying.


Surely we must be in sight
Of the dream we long to live.
If you stop and close your eyes,
You’ll picture me inside,
I’m so cold and all alone.


Draco angrily brushed a tear from his cheek and slammed the stereo off, staring evenly out of his window, seeing only her face.

* * *

In her dormitory, Ginny lay curled up on her four poster bed, eyes tightly shut, trying in vain to stop the tears from falling, a picture of her and Draco clasped tightly to her heart.