Never Sent : a one-shot
by xCheersForTheEnd

[a/n: This one shot was written primarily because I was attempting to focus on the similarities between Draco and Harry, and ended up using a writing exercise by Libba Bray...somehow ending with this. I hope you like it!

special thanks to my beta: Eilime. C= ]

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In the letter you never wrote me, you told me you'd never forget all those days we spent at that teashop in Diagon Alley. You told me you loved me, and in an instant my world was changed.

It’s funny how everything can change in an instant, Ginny. It's funny how one minute my world can be so dark and in the next it would be a brilliantly lit place because you walked into it. It's always amusing how you do such subtle things that can cheer me up always – like the way the freckles on your nose crinkle when you laugh; or how your eyes twinkle when you tease. It’s amazing how I could see you one moment as just Ron Weasley's little sister and suddenly you’re a beautiful young woman. It's shocking how much prejudice gets in the way of what we really feel.

However, it’s truly spectacular how in an instant you are taken away from me.

I still find it hard to sit at "our" table, remembering how the sun always shone through that window and onto those gorgeous auburn locks, reveling in the sparkling golden light. The smell of cinnamon with a dash of apple catches up to me at the worst of moments. But now I must remember you are no longer mine.

In that letter you never wrote me, you apologized.

Damn right you apologized. He had no right - that monster! That egotistical jerk. You were mine - wasn't I good enough for you? War was not a suitable answer when you left me waiting that day. I stayed in my seat until five. You had asked to meet you at twelve. You know what I got in return for my loyalty? A bouquet of roses and a scrap of parchment with a hastily written note. War was not acceptable. With or without a dark lord, love would still remain. But apparently, my hopes were wrong at a time they were needed most.

In that letter you never wrote me, you wished it could change. You explained. Yes, Ginny, you explained. But now I see you with him, happy as ever. I see him run his fingers through your hair when he kisses you. I see the freckles on your nose, the glint in your eyes. Everything that was once mine. What did he do that made him more deserving than I? Better than us? He doesn't deserve you. He isn't who you think he is. Merlin, Ginny, what made you so blind? The way he leads you around with all his friends, the way he's rolling in money? I suppose you think you have it all now: fancy husband, decent income, fair amount of press coverage - and what do I have?

I have a thousand dark nights that will never be spent with you. I have a chorus of broken voices. The victims of war. I have the misery, the stench of death in my hair. The poignant, musky odor that terrifies me of what is to come. The ringing of a hundred mournful cries. You abandoned me in my darkness. Left me alone to rot here in this…this prison. Confined by four walls. You're no better than a Death Eater, Gin. And I thought you were supposed to be strong. Where's your Gryffindor bravery now? You promised you'd wait - in that letter you never wrote me, you said nothing could tear us apart, not even the murderous gates of Azkaban.

Oh, I suppose he whispers sweet nothings in your ear before you sleep. At that very moment I hear a mother's cry as she loses a son; a husbands sobs as his wife slips into an everlasting sleep. I see a battlefield strewn with the mangled corpses of a nation torn apart by one person. I hear the wails of the tortured, the forlorn, and the forgotten. I am the forgotten. Left to die slowly by a crime I never committed. I sit here now to write this, my fame is gone, my status and power - reduced to a mere nameless criminal. And you never once stood up for me. You left, I watched, they chased me down.

In that letter you never wrote me, you came back. But that moment will never happen. And that letter was never written and I have long since been forgotten; a figure in the shadows always fighting to survive. To hold onto my sanity for just one more day.

And so this is my letter to you. To tell you how my life has been, and how absolutely perfect I have been while you're out dreaming away the hours with your significant other. You told me love would be my savior, but all it's done has been my destruction. It was supposed to save me from darkness, but now I find myself plunging headfirst into the icy black waters of despair. Alive but barely there. The only reassurance is that I am still breathing.

Ah yes, Ginevra Molly Potter. I have been given a mirror for good behavior. What I see is astonishing. A corpse in place of where once stood a strong and healthy young man. A gaunt, pale face, sharp cheekbones poking through at an odd angle. In the hollows where stormy grey eyes should be, I see two lifeless holes - distorted and dull. The slightest glimmer still reflects in the mirror of how I used to be. From the depths of that glass, a corpse was studying me. The look in those eyes as I broke the mirror will never leave me.

Oh yes, Mrs. Potter, I love you. I loved you for what you were: my angel - my savior. I love you now because I can hate you again. Hate you because I loved you. I hate the way you'll never be there for me again, but love you for finding someone to make you happy. Truth is beautiful, Ginny, without a doubt. Yet so are the lies. And so in exchange for that letter you never wrote; I give you this.

May it never be sent, just for you.

--- Draco Lucius Malfoy