The Bonds of Friendship

Remus Lupin, until the age of eleven, was a very solitary young boy. His circumstance had made him that way and, entering Hogwarts, he did not see why that should change. He had gotten quite used to being on his own, on having only the company of his own self and, if it came to that, his parents. What did he need friends for? Friends who would come close, share jokes and memories and then run when they found out the truth? Found out his curse? Better to stay alone, to stay apart and avoid an unnecessary ache of life. And thus he came to Hogwarts with no expectations, no hopes, no dreams of what the next seven years of his life might bring.

Well. That was before he met the Marauders.

They insisted he spend every moment with them, that they share meals and notes and parchment and quills and books. Jumpers. Beds in the heart of winter when even the fires of Hogwarts could not keep them warm. Classes. Food off each other’s plates. Jokes. Opinions. Memories. Secrets.

When he finally did share his secret, when they discovered it in their second year, he expected them to turn on him, and they didn’t. He expected them to expose him. They didn’t. He expected them to betray his trust the way he had betrayed their trust by keeping this from them. They didn’t. He expected them to run, screaming loudly for their lives and–Well. They did. But that was only because they had found him mid-transformation. It could be forgiven.

The Marauders stole the solitary Lupin from his loneliness with no intent to ever let him free again. And he became their willing captive.

The foursome became bound by a secret, bound by a
friendship the likes of which Hogwarts had never seen before. They were making history, the four Gryffindor boys, and though the solitary Remus disagreed with some of their pranks, though the boy who was grateful to Headmaster Dumbledore for allowing him to attend Hogwarts at all was filled with guilt for involving his friends–though all of these things made his stomach queasy, he had friends and he clung to this novelty, these people, with all the strength that was within him.

In fifth year, they became Animagi for him. They practiced illegal magic, underage and in secret...and they succeeded. They could have all ended up attached at the bum, but they didn’t. Not for nothing were they the best Transfiguration students of their year, let alone the best that some of the Professors had ever seen all together. They each managed to make an animal form theirs and from then on, the nights of Moony were forever changed in a way he never could have imagined, could have believed to be true. Could have never before believed possible.

That there were people in the world who would do this for him, who would choose to do this for the werewolf and the cursed soul–it only brought him closer to them, made him want to do whatever they asked without question or thought. He would do anything for them, these boys who had dared to take a dangerous situation in their own hands, who had dared to do something to change what they viewed as a wrong. Anything for these three boys who dared to make his humble life as easy as they could.

Their last few years at Hogwarts school passed and they left school. They got jobs, they fought for the Order. And though Moony ran alone once or twice, they remained close. Grew closer, if that was even possible. They remained the Marauders, unchanged but for the exception of James marrying Lily. Unchanged until Harry was born. Unchanged until a prophecy with two possibilities was made. Until the night when a betrayal occurred and he was left free to return to his unhappy solitude.

Moony vanished and Remus Lupin reappeared to live the life of loneliness he had always thought he would.

He had given himself freely to his captors, willingly put his hands out for the shackles of friendship, accepting everything that it meant. He had believed certain things of friendship, believed certain things of these people he had allowed to take hold of him and he had been wrong.

The next twelve years went by with painful similarity. He woke up. He fought through the day. He went to sleep. And then he began again. Only the monthly reminder broke this routine, broke it with the heartbreaking memories of what could have been. Only the full moon haunted him during this time, but it haunted him in the way he had haunted the grounds at Hogwarts. A relentless and unforgiving pain that rose within him as the moon rose out of the sky, insisting that he remember, insisting that he bear testament to the ways that friendship can go wrong, the ways that power can corrupt and the weak can crumble. Showing him the way that even the most loyal of friends, the most firm of all believers and followers could be led astray.

If only the Marauders hadn’t come to steal him away from the tediousness of what he’d had. If only they hadn’t stolen his heart, stolen his soul and his mind. He never would have known, never would have expected that life could or should be better than this. But he did know and this knowledge tore him apart. Tore Moony apart. Made the werewolf howl in a way that none had before, the pain and anguish ripping through him as he sought the only physical expression he knew for a pain so great it drove him mad in his loneliness. Drove him mad until-

Until twelve years had come and gone and the Marauders were reunited by chance and miracle.

And Moony returned to his lone surviving captor, hands held in front of him to take up again the priceless shackles of friendship and trust.