I was looking forward to the new school year with dread. Already known as “the goody two shoes,� I couldn’t help but try my hardest in school. “Is it really a crime to be smart?� I muttered to the birds sitting on a telephone line. It was early in the morning, and I had woken up before my parents to take a walk outside. It was a strange day; the sky was tickled pink, literally, with wispy cotton candy clouds. Looking up, bewildered, I wondered how….



PLOP. A giant bird doo landed on my shoulder. I slowly lowered my head down to get a closer look, and realized some bird up on that line was going to be very sorry. With a flash of annoyance, I looked up at the line, and shrieked. On it was the biggest and most drunken looking owl I had ever seen. It tottered on the line, its feet pedaling the air, until with a feathery FLUMP, it fell off the line and onto the ground. I realized the poor thing looked slightly electrocuted, but it shook its head, and stuck out its leg like none of this had ever happened.



I reached out, and took what I perceived to be a piece of…parchment. On it words scrolled out one after the other, and I almost dropped it in alarm. It read:



~Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry~

Headmaster: Albus Dumbledore

(Order of Merlin, First Class, Grand Sorc., Chf. Warlock, Supreme Mugwump, International Confed. of Wizards)



Dear Ms. Granger,

We are pleased to inform you that you have been accepted at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Please find enclosed a list of all necessary books and equipment.

Term begins on September 1. We await your owl by no later than July 31.

Yours sincerely,

Minerva McGonagall (Deputy Headmistress)



I gasped, tripped, and my hands let go of the letter before I could comprehend what it said. It landed on the owl, which made it crackle with electricity. The owl hooted in indignation, but I still hadn’t forgiven it for relieving itself on my jacket. Taking deep breaths, I thought to myself logically. “This must be some sort of prank,� I muttered under my breath. “Some really nasty prank.� Then I heard the voice of a man, almost inside my head.



“This is not a joke,� he said. I whirled around, wracking my brains for what sort of disease I must possess to be hearing things like this. With a POP, an old man in long robes appeared out of thin air, and righted his crooked half moon glasses.



“I am Albus Dumbledore,� he said. “Welcome to Hogwarts.�



The next few hours went by in a rush. It turned out magic was real, and I was a witch. It took me all of my reasoning not to pass out. The only thing I could think was: This is completely normal. This is completely normal. Of course this is normal. Mundane, even…who am I kidding. God I have got to get this bird dropping off of my shoulder… Professor Dumbledore looked up, and deep into my eyes. “I have a lot of girls like yourself to notify; I’ll see your parents tonight.� he said. “I wouldn’t want to interrupt your father’s work.� His eyes twinkled with what looked like mischief, and in a flash he was gone.



Running madly into the house, I slammed the door. There, in the hallway, was my father working on a patient, glinting pliers in his mouth. “Almost…done...,� my dad whispered. I sighed. Constantly my parents were taking their dentistry work home, because both of the buildings they worked in constantly flooded.



“Dad...I have something to tell you,� I whispered. “You’re going to hear about it more, but I want you to know beforehand so you don’t…freak out when he’s here.�



“Who’s here?� whined my father. “Open wider, now.� The patient obliged through his blaring music. I guessed the poor guy had been there for ages, and had gotten bored.



I couldn’t figure out any subtle way of putting it, so I decided there was only one thing to do.



“I’m magical.� Stepping from foot to foot, I waited for a response.



“WHAT?� my father shouted. With a snap, the pliers bent in the patient’s mouth, and he moaned. “Oh…uh…open wider!� gasped my dad.



The patient stopped singing along to his music and responded with a: “UGHGARRRRRGHGHG GERROFF ME GERROFF!� His bloody tooth was in his hands.



I barreled forth, not knowing what to do. “I have this letter. It says that I am a witch and I’m going to a school…Hogwarts. I know it’s real…a man appeared with a pop and told me so.�



“GRAAAAAAAHHH!� screamed the man. Dad was ripping out another one of his teeth absentmindedly, staring off into the distance. With a pop, not unlike the one I had heard earlier, another tooth came out.



“That was supposed to happen,� Dad covered. “Here, take this.� He stuck a half dozen cotton wads into the patient’s mouth.



“Dad, seriously. I need you to focus. You can’t tell anybody about this. Professor Dumbledore is coming tonight, he would have come earlier…but you had a patient…I guess Dumbledore couldn’t understand this guy wouldn’t hear a word he said anyways.�



The patient was gagging on cotton balls, and reaching into his mouth to take them out. “DON’T TOUCH YOUR…!� shouted my dad. But it was too late. Out came another precious gold capped tooth, and then another. Dad ran to get another pair of pliers, and yelled, “Who’s bloody Doredumble, anyways?� He tripped over a chair and knocked his elbow into the open mouth of the screaming patient.



“OHHH BLOODY HELL!!!� The patient now had six or seven teeth in his hands, and was clutching them like pearls. “GET ME OUTTA HERE! GET ME OUT!� He stood up in his chair, and slipped. Down he went, and he knocked his head on a sink. The headphones miraculously stayed on his ears, pumping rock music. The man did not get back up.



“Oh…no…� muttered Dad. “Hermione, I don’t understand. I do not understand.�



I felt awful for the poor patient. It was my fault he had hurt himself so badly. I hoped he would be all right. I felt myself suddenly grow dizzy.



My father rubbed his eyes, staring at the now upright patient, who slapped a hundred pounds into my dad’s hands. He laughed loudly over his music. “Thanks for the service. I didn’t feel a thing!� He flashed a toothy grin—all of his teeth intact.



As he walked out, my dad stared at me. “Magic, eh?� he muttered. “Magic indeed.�