Lord of the Wands by ShadowWalker1140
Summary: Reunions are always so touching, right? Wrong. Minerva McGonagall used a simple spell, and that simple spell may have caused the end of the world, unless one wizard, Harry Potter can defeat Voldemort. With the help of his friends on this quest, he might just be able to do it.
Categories: Humor Fics Characters: None
Warnings: None
Challenges:
Series: None
Chapters: 4 Completed: No Word count: 3860 Read: 8763 Published: 12/08/04 Updated: 12/31/05

1. Old Friends by ShadowWalker1140

2. So Long by ShadowWalker1140

3. New Companions by ShadowWalker1140

4. Avada Kedavra! by ShadowWalker1140

Old Friends by ShadowWalker1140
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The Fellowship of the Wand
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Minerva McGonagall sat at her desk writing her book when she suddenly stopped. Something was missing and she didn’t know what. Then it hit her she started searching her pockets fervently until she found what she was looking for it was a very old wand that she had found in a cave some years back. She stared at it intently.

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Harry was standing next to a big willow tree and it looked like he was waiting for someone. When he heard a carriage he jumped and headed over to the road, “Your late,” he said to the man driving the carriage.

“I am not late Mr. Potter a wizard arrives exactly when he means too,” he said plainly. He had a very old black hat on that matched the black robes he was wearing and which made his white beard stick out. They both started to laugh.

“Dumbledore I’ve missed you so much,” Harry said. He jumped of the side of the hilltop trying to fall into Dumbledore’s open arms but missed the cart by about a foot and landed on the ground with a loud *thump* Dumbledore looked down Harry had done a belly smacker in the dirt which made Dumbledore start to laugh harder.

“That’s not funny,” he said starting to stand up. He began to spit dirt out.

“Well, shall we go?” Dumbledore asked. Harry nodded and started to climb onto the cart.
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Knock Knock Dumbledore stood in front of Minerva McGonagalls door waiting for her to open up.

"Yes, yes what is it," she stuck her head out the door. "Oh Albus it's you!" She moved out of the way to let him in.

Harry walked forward only to get the door slammed in his face. "Okay," he said, "I'll just wait out here."
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“How is life going for you Minerva it looks as if you haven’t aged a bit?" DUmbledore asked.

“It’s going well I suppose,” she seemed kind of uneasy.

“Well that’s good.” Dumbledore wasn’t very observant at times like these so he didn’t much notice the uneasiness in her voice. “Are you ready to party Minerva?” Dumbledore said excitment written all over his face.

“Yeah I’m ready to party are you ready to party Albus?” Minerva responded in the same way, happy to get off the subject of her age.

“Yeah I’m ready to party are you ready to party Harry?” There was no reply. “Harry?”

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The party had begun. Everywhere people were mostly eating and dancing and most everyone was drinking it was turning out to be a pretty good party.

Fred and George Weasley stood against a wall waiting for the right moment until Dumbledore would leave for some reason. Both had a plan up their sleeve but they wouldn’t be able to get anywhere close to the firecrackers unless Dumbledore left so they waited. And then the moment had arrived Dumbledore had left to go and eat. They snuck onto the back of the carriage and Fred randomly picked the biggest one there, “This should be good,” he said.

“Then grab it and lets go,” George said. They carried the firecracker inside the tent and stuck it in the ground, George lit it, “This is going to be exciting he said.” The firecracker started to lift up and then it exploded into the air. The firecracker turned into a flaming dragon and was flying around the tent where everyone was, everywhere you could see people dropping down trying not to get hit by the dragon. After a couple more seconds the dragon exploded into beautiful colors.

“Wow…lets get another one.” Fred said. They started to head back to the carriage to get another one when someone grabbed them by the ear.

“Fred and George Weasley, I should have known.”

Later as Minerva walked onto the stage people started chanting speech speech. She started a speech, “Hello everyone, you know I’m not to well with farewells,” she laughed to herself well with farewells, “so I will make this short and simple,” she felt for her pocket, “and I will just say good-bye.” She disappeared and everyone just stared at the empty stage. Dumbledore stood up and headed for Minerva’s house he had an idea about what was going on.

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So Long by ShadowWalker1140
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Dumbledore opened the door to Minerva’s house and turned toward the kitchen. He saw her packing her things. “So are you planning to go through with it?” he asked.


“Yes,” she answered.

“What about Harry?”

“I’m leaving him in your care.”

“And the wand?”

She stopped packing and stood silent for a moment.

“Minerva,” Dumbledore said, “what about the wand?”

She felt for her pocket. “I-I-I’m going to leave it to Harry along with the rest of the stuff.”

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Harry and Ron sat at a table watching Fred and George try to wrestle. It wasn’t going very well. They were trying to do it on a narrow table and Fred kept falling off. On the last try, Fred fell off and he dragged George down with him so they both quit.

“Ron, do you want some more butterbeer?” Harry asked.

“No, I think I’m going to start to head back.”

“Alright, I’ll go with you.”

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“Well,” Minerva said while looking up at Dumbledore, “I’m ready to be off.”

“Where’s the wand?”

“Oh…uh…it’s on the mantel,” she answered.

When Dumbledore turned toward the mantelpiece to pick up the wand, she ran out the door.

“Minerva, I don’t see it.” Dumbledore turned around and he saw that she was gone. “MINERVA MCGONAGALL!”

Minerva heard him and started running faster but she didn’t get much farther. She had run into something hard and landed on her bottom. When she looked up she saw Dumbledore.

“Where do you think you're going?” he asked.

“Away………from here?” she answered, kind of unsure.

“You still have the wand.”

“Oh yeah.”

“Give it to me.”

“You just want it for yourself!” Minerva yelled.

“I think you’ve had that wand long enough.”

“I WON’T GIVE IT TO YOU!!!!!!!!!” She started laughing like a maniac.

Dumbledore glared at her and she stopped laughing. “Sorry,” she said, “I guess you should take the wand.” She pulled the wand out of her bag and handed it to him.

“Thank you,” he said, “now you can be on your way.”

“Good bye,” she said and gave Dumbledore a hug.

“Good bye, old friend.”

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Harry walked into the house and saw Dumbledore sitting by the fire.

“She’s gone hasn’t she?” Harry asked.

“Yes,” Dumbledore answered, “she has gone, but she did leave you this.” Dumbledore handed Harry the wand.

“There’s something about this wand, Harry,” Dumbledore said.

“What is it?” Harry asked.

“If I tell you this, will you promise not to tell anyone?”

“Yes.”

“The wand was carved by a very powerful wizard, Harry. This wizard put a lot of himself in this wand. When a war came, he fought and gained more and more power. When he lost this wand, there was a battle. It took place shortly after he had conquered most of Middle Earth. He appeared in front and destroyed most of the army but one man stood up to him. Before the man died, he chopped off this wizard’s hand.”

“And who is this wizard?”

“Voldemort.”

“By using this wand…” Dumbledore paused and then continued, “Minerva has unleashed the wrath of Voldemort and he will continue to search until he finds his wand. Which, at the moment, lies with you.”

Harry just stared at him dumbstruck so he continued to explain. “That means that you must leave the Shire and go and destroy the wand.”

“How exactly do I do this?”

“You must destroy it in a duel against Voldemort.”

Harry continued to stare at him, "You expect me to fight the most powerful wizard?"

"Yes," said Dumbledore calmly.

"Well...okay. You talked me into it."

"That’s gre..." Dumbledore stopped he walked towards the window, opened the shutters, and pulled someone up and on to the floor. Harry looked down and saw his friend Ronald Weasley. "Ron, what are you doing here?"

"Oh…uh…hi Harry," said Ron, "I was just out in the...hedges... and thought I’d um stop by for a..."

"That's enough, Mr. Weasley. How much of that did you hear?" asked Dumbledore.

"All of it."

"Great. Then you can go with Harry."

"I mean I heard absolutely nothing."

"I don't think so, your going."

Ron looked very disappointed. Harry walked over to Ron and put his arm around him. "It's OK, Ron. Just think about you and me travelin' together. Maybe havin' some laughs. Possibly dying some horrible death. Wouldn't that be great?" Now Ron was extremely pale.

Dumbledore rolled his eyes. "OK, you two better start packing. The faster you leave, the happier we’ll all be."

"What?" Harry asked looking up.

"Oh…uh…nothing! Let’s start to pack. I think it's best if you two are able to leave as soon as possible."

They all started to pack, well Dumbledore didn't but you get the point.

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"Well," Harry said, "I guess this is good bye."

"Not exactly, Harry. I will meet you at a certain point in your journey," said Dumbledore.

"Well then," said Ron, "we will see you at that certain point."

Harry and Ron began to walk down the road. Once they had reached the middle, they both turned around and waved to Dumbledore, who waved back. Harry looked at Ron and asked him, "What do you think is going to happen to us?"

"Harry," Ron said, "I don't really want to think about that now. I mean, it's all your fault I got dragged into this thing."

"Ron, you were sitting outside my window. How is that my fault?"

"Oh…right."

They continued to walk on until, all of a sudden, Ron stopped. He looked extremely scared.
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New Companions by ShadowWalker1140
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Harry turned around noticing that Ron had stopped following him.

“Ron what is it?” he asked.

”Nothing, it’s just I’ve never gone farther than this point,” Ron answered.

”Well...” Harry thought for a moment. Coming up with nothing he decided to say, “You’re just a chicken! Moooooooooo!”

”Um...Harry?”

”Yeah.”

”Chickens don’t moo.”

”Yeah well...you would know you...you...chicken!”

”Another pointless conversation between Mr. Harry Potter and Mr. Ronald Weasley," said a voice from behind them. Harry and Ron froze. Slowly they turned around.

”You’re both asses,” Harry said looking at Ron’s two brothers.

”Takes one to know one!” Fred shot back at him with the look of hate. George gave him a high five and started laughing trying to lighten the mood, it wasn't working.

Ron looked at Harry and whispered, “I always knew he needed therapy but anger management?”

Harry looked at him. “What is that? Anyways what do you two want?”

”Nothing really. We got bored from running from that Old Man Jenkins after we stole some vegetables.” It was George who answered.

”Yeah,” continued Fred, “He’s like slower than molasses.”

”Which is pretty slow,” George said.

”Go figure,” Fred said.

"Did you two take your medication today?" Ron asked.

"Maybe......" Fred said.

"What's it to you?" George continued.

"Nothing. Sooooooo..........you guys wanna come with us?"

"That depends, what are you doing?" Fred asked.

"To sum it up walking to our doom," Harry said.

"Sounds good to me," Fred said. "How about you George?"

"I'm in....I think...." George answered.
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Harry, Ron, Fred, and George walked along the side of the road. They were heading for the pub that was up ahead. As soon as Harry put his foot on the road there was an eerie silence and then they heard a high pitched scream.

”What was that?” Fred and George asked.

”I don’t know, but I think we should get off the road,” said Harry as he was backing up.

”I think you’re right,” Ron said just so he didn't feel left out.

”Hey Ron did you take your medication today?"George asked.
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”I think they’re over here!” shouted a muffled voice.

”Well then, GO CHECK IT OUT!” yelled a high-pitched voice.

”Yes sir,” answered the first voice. “Man I get no respect,” He mumbled to himself, “I mean, it’s not my fault he sat on a whoopee cushion and screamed.”
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Harry was hiding with the others under the invisibility cloak that he found conveniently placed in his sack. He watched as a cloaked figure walked in front of them and then farther forth. He turned around as he heard a twig snap. Harry looked down. It was one of the twins.

”I know you’re out there!” He started towards where they were hidden. They all stepped back and turned to run just as the cloaked figure pulled out his wand. ”Avada Kedavra!” It missed by a couple centimeters, “Damn it.”

”You couldn’t hit water if you fell out of a boat!” Harry shouted back with laughs coming from Fred, George, and Ron.
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They kept running until they reached the door of the inn, which had seemed a lot closer before they were attacked. They entered it and found an empty table.

”Mental note to self,” Harry said, “stay off the road.”

”Agreed,” everyone murmured.

”I’m going to go get some butter beer,” Ron said. ”Harry, do you want any?”

”Yeah, but I’ll just come up with you.”

Harry stood up with his hands in his pockets. He was fingering the wand.

”What can I get you?” The bartender asked.

”Two butter beers,” Ron said.

Harry pulled out the wand while waiting for the drinks. He was admiring the glow that it gave off. He was bumped into by one of the other customers in the bar and the wand was knocked out of his hand. He dove for it. “Raider!” he shouted. The next thing anyone knew was that Harry was gone.

”Harry! Harry, this is no time for hide-and-seek!” Ron yelled at the spot where Harry had been.
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Harry looked around him. He wasn’t in the bar anymore. An eye appeared in front of him.

“I see you!”

He jumped back and dropped the wand. Everything around him started to come into focus.
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”Harry!” Fred, George, and Ron yelled at him.

”What the bloody hell happened!?” Ron yelled into his ear.

”I don’t know.” Harry was looking dazed.

”What does Raider mean?" Fred asked.

”I don’t know…”

"Maybe he's on medication too."

"Shut up Ron." George said slapping him along the head. Harry looked up at everyone, they were giving him funny looks.

"Lert's all agree to stop with the medication thing because it's not funny anymore," George said.

"Alright," Fred and Ron agreed.

The next thing Harry knew was someone was grabbing him by the scruff of the neck and was hauling him up the stairs.

”What the...”

”Shut up and don’t ask questions, said a harsh voice.”

Ron, Fred, and George turned around, "And that goes for you to Harry," they looked around, he was gone, "Harry?"
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Avada Kedavra! by ShadowWalker1140
“Who are you?” Harry asked.

“For now you can call me . . .”

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“Are you sure they went this way?” Ron asked.

“Yeah,” Fred answered.

“They went through that door,” George continued.

Slowly they made there way towards the door trying to listen for Harry’s voice, “This is hopeless,” he whispered.

“Let’s just knock down the door,” Ron suggested.

“Works for me,” Fred and George agreed. “On the count of three, 1…2…3!”

Fred kicked down the door only to have a woman give off a high-pitched scream from fright.

“I don’t think that was the right door,” Ron blushed.

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“. . . Ferret,” the man answered. Harry started cracking up from the odd name.

“Ferret?” He laughed. “I’m sure there’s a good story behind that!”

“Forget it . . . my name is Malfoy, Draco Malfoy,” the man said. “What about you?”

“Oh, my names Harry, Harry Potter.” After he said that they heard a high-pitched scream. “What was that?”

“I don’t know,” Draco said, pulling his wand out of his pocket. “Bring out your wand, just in case.”

Together they walked towards the door that led to the hallway. Harry took a step out of it and saw Fred, George, and Ron getting beat up by an old woman, wearing a knitted, purple shawl with a broomstick.

“That’s what you get for scaring an old woman!” The old lady screamed, while beating the boys with her broom. “You also scared the fluff off of Mr. Whiskers!”

“Back off you old hag!” Ron yelled as he held his arms up to protect his head from the broomstick that would whack him whenever he tried to talk to the woman.

“Yeah,” said George, who was using Ron as a shield from the blows. “We didn’t mean to”” but he was quickly cut off when he had to duck because the broomstick almost hit him on the head.

“Fred, George, Ron! Over here!” Harry yelled to his three friends. They looked up at the sound of his voice and started retreating from the old woman to the door.

Draco slammed it when they all ran inside the room, deafening the screams coming from the old woman, who was pounding on the door saying that they were a bunch of ninnies, and couldn‘t steal candy from a four-year-old girl.


“What was that about?” Draco asked, shocked from the language coming from the old woman on the other side of the door.

“Wrong door . . . ” Fred answered. It seemed Ron and George were too stunned to say anything as they sat in two wooden chairs, their eyes wide.

“Listen, thanks to your friends,” Draco said to Harry while looking at Fred, George, and Ron, “it would be best if we got out of here right now.”

They agreed to leave through the window so they could leave in quiet and not have to worry about their crazy neighbor.

After they left, Draco led them to an ancient watchtower on a tall hill ten miles from the lodge. It was cold, creepy, and there were statues of dead kings looking at them from their stone thrones.

“This,” Harry said slowly, “is your idea of a good place to sleep?”

“Everyone get comfortable,” Draco said, ignoring Harry sarcasm. “Tomorrow morning we’ll be leaving again.”

“Thank Merlin for good favors,” George said under his breath.

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Night settled very quickly over the hill surrounding them in darkness. Draco was sitting by himself away from the others as they slept. He was softly singing a sad song in a different language to himself but stopped and looked up at the sound of someone approaching.

“Who’s the girl you’re singing of?” Asked Harry, looking at Draco with new respected.

“I’m not singing of a girl,” Draco answered quickly.

“Then you’re singing of a man?” Harry asked, looking shocked.

“No!” Draco said looking disgusted at the thought.

“Because if you are, then that’s ok I promise not to tell anyone . . .”

“I told you, I’m not singing of a man!” Draco half yelled, almost raising from the ground to walk off.

“Wow . . . then you’re singing of an it?” Harry said sarcastically.

“No!” Draco shouted exasperated. “I was singing of a woman.”

“But then . . .”

“I was trying to be mysterious.”

“Oh,” Harry said, “I guess I kind of screwed that up.”

“You think?”

“Not recently…why?”

“Never mind.” Draco got up and walked over to the campsite. “What the bloody hell are you doing!”

“We just lit a fire . . .” George said looking up from were he was cooking marshmallows.

Harry grabbed a heavy cloak and put out the fire with it.

“The Death Eaters might have spotted the flame!” Draco shouted at them.

“Either that or they could have heard your yelling,” Fred said.

Draco scolded him.

“Shut up and listen. Let’s just . . .”

He saw a black shape wondering in the shadows. He stopped his sentence short and pulled out his wand, motioning for the others to do the same.

“Avada Kedavra!” The shot missed Fred by a couple inches but shattered the rock next to him.

“That must be the guy from the road,” Harry whispered. Ron snorted and got a glaring look from Draco.

Four Death Eaters entered at the corners, as another one with snake like eyes entered through the middle. Draco muttered a spell that created a shield around them, protecting them from weak spells. Harry stood in the middle of the group and turned to face the heavily cloaked figure, while the rest turned on the four Death Eaters.

In unison the Death Eaters shouted, “Crucio!” Knocking Draco, Ron, Fred, and George to their knees.

“I am the Dark Lord,” the heavily cloaked man started, his voice held a cold hiss. “Give me the wand and die, or I will take it by force and you will still die.”

“Then I guess your taking it by force . . . and I’ll die. Wait! No! Is there a third option?” Harry said quickly.

“Avada Kedavra!”

The spell hit Harry square in the chest but he only fell to his knees, a lightning shaped scar formed on his forehead. Voldemort screamed in agony and rage and he and his Death Eaters disappeared in a blinding white light.

Fred, George, Ron, and Draco staggered over to where Harry laid unconscious.

“What . . . do we do . . . ?” Fred asked clutching at a pillar to stay upright.

“I’m not sure no one has ever survived that spell.” George added.

They suddenly felt a strong wind and it threw them onto the ground. A black Thestral landed lightly down next to them, it‘s white eyes staring at them with little interest.

“Give him to me,” a woman’s voice said softly from atop the Thestral. “I’ll take care of him.”

Draco looked up to the woman.

That voice . . .it sounded so familiar. He thought to himself.

“The Death Eaters are still out there,” he said sitting up. How could he have not recognized her voice?

“I know the risks,” she said with power showing in her voice, “and knowing this boy’s destiny; I’m willing to take them.”

He stood up as the searing pain started to diminish. He slowly bent down and lifted Harry up to the Thestral she was riding.

“Be careful,” he told her silently.

“You know me,” she smiled.

“I know . . . and that’s why I’m saying be careful.” She laughed and slowly shot into the air carefully holding onto Harry

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