I do not own the lyrics in this chapter, they belong to the Hilary Duff album

Chapter One: Underneath This Smile


She couldn’t believe it. No, she wouldn’t believe it.

Ginny Weasley raced desperately along the empty hallways of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. The laughter of students was long gone and faded away with time; only to be replaced by a dead silence and a cold wind that blew through the broken widows of the once great school.

The youngest Weasley’s crimson hair whipped across her face as she ran furiously. Ginny ignored the aching stitch in her side. Ginny’s legs protested against their cruel treatment and her chest moved up and down rapidly. She forced herself to run faster through the halls.

Ginny reached the top of the stairs; her heart beating hard against her ribcage as memories flooded her exhausted mind.

‘Everyone was wrong. He wasn’t gone. He just couldn’t be,’ she thought, tears stinging her eyes.

“Harry,” Ginny cried. “I can’t stand them anymore. They just won’t stop tormenting me in class, meals. They’re everywhere!”

Harry ran his fingers through her smooth and silky red hair, making shushing sounds to calm her. He calmly whispered words in her ear and her breathing slowed.

“It’s ok Gin, I’ll always be here for you,” Harry said, letting her bury her head in his chest. “You know that don’t you?”

Ginny looked up into his sparkling emerald eyes and slowly nodded. Her cheeks were tear-stained but she didn’t shed another tear [after his declaration of love]. Their lips were drawing closer and closer, as their eyes [fluttered in anticipation]. Both their lips parted slightly as they touched softly, at first. Then, Ginny’s mouth opened completely and Harry’s tongue began exploring this new area.

“I really like you, Harry,” she whispered.

“I really like you too, Gin.”

The red haired girl continued racing through the halls. However, the portraits didn’t yell at her or scoff in disapproval; one of the paintings had tried to admonish the rule-breaking girl, and she had ripped it off the wall in anger, throwing it down the stairs.

She reached the Hospital Wing, standing motionless as she stared at the farthest bed in the wing. People surrounded the bed, blocking her view of her beloved. Most of them were Weasley’s, their red hair standing out, but Ginny could also see Remus and Nymphadora Lupin.

Lying on the bed was a familiar faced young man. His face was covered in scratches; the one standing out the best was the infamous lightning bolt scar on his forehead. His eyes were still open in determination; the last emotion he had felt before meeting the end of his life when the Killing Curse had met its target.

Ginny didn’t remember falling to the ground, or hitting the hard floor with a sickening thud. She didn’t remember everyone turning around in surprise. Her mother had cradled her daughter’s head in her lap while everyone looked on sadly.

Remus had stayed near the still, and forever would be still, lifeless body of his godson, Harry. He placed his hand over Harry’s eyes and closed them slowly, shedding many tears as he did so.

---

Ginny woke up nearly three days later. An elderly Madam Pomfrey had said that her body was exhausted physically and emotionally, and she needed time to rest.

However, she refused to eat. Ginny refused to co-operate with anyone, even her own mother. Mrs Weasley had a screaming match with her one afternoon, reducing Ginny to tears.

A week later, Ginny returned to the Burrow which was a gloomy place now. The Weasley’s moped around, and the only sound heard at the dinner table was of knives and forks scraping against the plates.

Everywhere she went, she was reminded of Him; especially at the secret pond behind the big oak tree out the back of the Burrow. It was their spot.

“Come on Harry.”

Ginny held out her hand as she tapped the charmed Muggle CD player with his wand. The soft, sweet music began playing as Harry turned red but took Ginny’s hand.

“I can’t dance very well, Ginny,” he protested, laughing lightly.

“I’ll teach you, Harry,” she said, kissing him softly on the lips. “Don’t worry.”

They danced; Twirling and turning on the spot were the grass was extra green. Ginny could still feel the sun’s rays on her face, and the cool breeze in her hair of that day.

After a few moments of dancing and Ginny’s coaching, they stopped their twirling, breathing slightly faster than before.

The sweating girl wiped the trickle of sweat of her forehead and flicked it playfully at Harry.
“I am so hot,” she breathed.

“In more than one way Gin,” Harry muttered under his breath, but luckily Ginny didn’t hear him.

“Come on Harry, let’s go for a swim, it’ll cool us off!” Ginny said over her shoulder.

She headed down to the water’s edge, sliding her dress off her to reveal a yellow coloured bikini. Harry’s mouth dropped open as she stepped slowly into the water.

“Coming, Harry?” she asked teasingly, twirling around in the waist deep water. “The water’s nice and cool.”

Harry slid his pants off and Ginny noticed that he had a dark green pair of board shorts underneath. He also took his shirt off, and dropped it next to his pants on the picnic blanket.

He gave a whoop of glee as he mastered a perfect cannon ball into the water, surprising Ginny.

---

They lay on the picnic blanket, still dripping wet, but quite refreshed after their dip in the pond. Harry reached nervously into his pants pocket when Ginny had turned to admire the calling of birds in the tree.

“Gin?” Harry asked, swallowing loudly.

She turned to face him and her eyes fell on the velvet box in his hand. Harry pulled her to her feet as he bent down on one knee. Ginny’s hand flew to her mouth in surprise.

“I love you so much, Gin, with everything that is going on right now, the war and Voldemort, there has never been a more perfect time to ask for your hand in marriage,” he said quickly. “If I don’t come out of the battle that is ahead, then I want to die knowing that you loved me enough to become my wife, will you marry me, Ginevra Molly Weasley?”

Ginny gave a squeal of delight and tackled Harry playfully to the ground.

“Of course, Harry!” she cried out. “Yes, I will marry you!”

Flashback Over


Underneath this smile
My world is slowly caving in
All the while
I'm hanging on

She forced a smile upon her face each day as her life went on without her love by her side. She forced herself to make everyone believe that she had moved on, that she had forgotten the pain that she constantly felt in her heart. But she would never forget that pain. She would never move on.

Underneath her smile, her world was slowly caving in.

---

“Are you ready, Ginny?”

Ginny Weasley stood, rather stiff looking, facing the mirror. Her straight, red hair had been pulled up into a tight bun and she wore a simple sleeved black dress that came down her below her knees.

“Will I ever be Hermione?” she asked quietly.

Hermione went to wrap her in a comforting hug but Ginny pulled away, “Let’s get this over and done with.”

***

“Dearly beloved, we have gathered today to mourn the death of a dear friend of ours, Harry James Potter,” the priest said sadly, frowning deeply.

The priest was an elderly man with too many wrinkles to count. His black suit was dead straight with no creases at all. A small mop of white hair sat on top of his head, with little wispy bits floating down into his eyes.

The Burrow was packed with people who wished to mourn the death of Harry. He was to be buried near the pond in the special garden that Ginny and he had started just before he died. It was filled with different healing plants as well as Muggle plants. In the very middle of the garden, they had cleared a spot to dig the grave for Harry’s coffin. Ginny had insisted that he be buried there in that spot, she didn’t take no for an answer.

After the funeral, people walked up to the grave to pay their respects, dropping white roses onto the dirt.

She couldn’t do this. Not with everyone else here.

Ginny ran past everyone. She bumped into many tearful people, some she didn’t even know who they were, but she paid no attention to them.

She kept running.

And she never wanted to stop.

She couldn’t do this. Not with everyone else here.

Ginny ran past everyone. She bumped into many tearful people, some she didn’t even know who they were, but she paid no attention to them.

She kept running.

And she never wanted to stop


Ginny Weasley staggered down the dirt road. There was nothing behind her or in front. She had to try and forget the events that were in her past, and didn’t want to think about but she had no future. Ginny knew she could live without him; the only one she had ever loved: Harry James Potter.

His name caused her to flinch every time she read it in the paper. His name was everywhere but the story was the same all the time. Boy Who Lived Dies Defeating Dark Lord, read the latest gossip filled newspaper. Ginny couldn’t stand it anymore. She had put on a brave face for far too long, but underneath her smile, she was in heartbreaking pain.

Each tear drop that fell caused a cloud of dust to rise from the road as she kept running. Her head dropped slightly but she forced herself to keep going. The bottoms of her feet were swollen and red from walking. Ginny could still remember the only other time she had been so tired of walking and running.

It had been a sunlit day at the Burrow when fear didn’t control their every move; they had been able to roam fields and garden freely. Harry had taken her down to their secret pond behind the large oak tree out in the back garden. He had set up a picnic for them both. All day they had kissed and chased each other; happy to feel the suns rays on their faces and the wind in their hair.

She cried out in pain just thinking of him, and sunk to the ground on her knees. How could she go on without him? She couldn’t but the solution was simple. She couldn’t live with him, but in death they would be together. She pulled out the long, slender piece of wood from her pocket and stared unfocusedly at it. It was the only way she reasoned madly.

Ginny centered the wand on her chest, over her heart, determined to finish it now. She was about to recite the dreaded words that had ended Harry’s life over a year ago when someone took her by surprise.

“Miss?”

The words broke the silence and Ginny glanced up, startled. She couldn’t believe her eyes. There in front of her, where dirt had rested a few moments ago, was a small pub, The Green Dragon , the sign read that swung in the slight breeze.

A man with a short, white beard and a large, bulging belly stood there with a concerned expression on his face.
“Perhaps we could talk about this before you do something you’ll regret, Miss,” he said, taking her hand in his and pulling her gently towards the pub door. “My name is Blenkinsop Waterbut by the way.”

---

She didn’t know how she came to tell this man her story. He seemed nice enough. He was a large fellow with a stomach that jiggled like jelly when he moved, and a cheery smile that never seemed to disappear, until she told her story to him.

“Miss Weasley is it?” asked the man again.

He held out a chubby hand and she took it timidly. He resumed his place behind the bar as Ginny sat gloomily on one of the stools in front of the bar.

“How ‘bout the house special’s, Miss Weasley?” he asked cheerfully.

She nodded glumly and put her head in her hands. Her wand was burning a hole in her pocket, willing her to finish was she started; to kill herself and be with Harry again.

Blenkinsop poured her a large and dirty looking mug of bright red liquid. Blenkinsop passed the mug to her and she gulped down the drink noisily.

“Want to talk ‘bout what you were doing out there, Miss Weasley?” he questioned as she placed the now empty mug on the counter.

“You don’t want to hear that Mr Waterbut,” Ginny said, her voice barely a whisper.
Blenkinsop took her mug and began cleaning it with a dirty rag, his eyes trained on the mug.

“Sometimes the only thing you can do is talk,” he said quietly; she sighed loudly but began talking.

“Harry Potter was my whole life, Mr Waterbut. We were to be wed next spring, but instead we just had the funeral and there is no wedding,” she cried, her tears falling on the dusty counter.

She fiddled with her engagement ring as she talked about how the wedding was going to be perfect. She had already picked out which flowers would decorate the back garden. She had even bought her wedding dress already.

They talk all night and into the early morning. As morning approached, Ginny felt as though the burden of the world had been lifted off her shoulders; she felt rid of the guilt she had been carrying round for the past couple of months. She felt guilty because she hadn’t been there to help Harry fight. He had said he didn’t want her to get hurt. She didn’t care about getting hurt, all she wanted to do was help him.

After she finished, Blenkinsop handed her a few tissues and she took them gratefully. He checked his watch.

“Maybe you should stay the night, we have a spare room upstairs, you wouldn’t have to pay at all, free of charge,” he said politely.

“I don’t think so, I should go,” she said.

Her words were slightly slurred, and her vision was slowly going as well.
“Miss Weasley, I really think you should stay, you had one too many to drink,” Blenkinsop said calmly, helping her to her feet.

In a matter of moments, Blenkinsop had helped her upstairs and into a spare room. He left her after showing her where the bathroom was, and giving her the key to lock the room.

Ginny surveyed the room curiously. The bed was neatly made with gold coloured sheets, a blanket, and pillow cases of the same colour. The bathroom was extremely white with a bath with yellow towels hanging on the edge; the lavatory also had a shower, toilet and a sink with a mirror that hanged above the basin.

She examined herself in the mirror carefully. She had shadows underneath her brown eyes which were red from crying.

She didn’t have anything to change into. She simply folded back the blankets and sheets and lay in the bed, exhausted from the emotional rollercoaster.

It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all
By Alfred Lord Tennyson

She stared blankly at the ceiling, as her head sunk into the comfortable pillows. The blankets came right up to her chin and she wriggled slightly, moving even further down the bed; any further and her toes would be seen poking out from underneath the covers.

The delicious smell of sizzling bacon met her nose and it twitched. Ginny sighed as her stomach grumbled, pleading for her to feed it. She didn’t want to leave the safety of the bed. She just wanted to stay here, away from the worried and angry voices of her family who were probably furiously searching for her after she disappeared at the funeral.

“Miss Weasley?” The voice of Blenkinsop Waterbut sounded through the closed door.

“Miss Weasley, if you’re interested, breakfast is waiting for you downstairs,” he said loudly through the wooden door.

She closed her eyes, wishing herself to fall asleep again; but sleep did not come. She stayed wide awake.

Ginny pushed back the covers and hopped out of the bed, her feet hit the cold surface of the floor boards. In the back of her head, she wished that she was at the Burrow with Harry, getting out of bed and putting on her fluffy pink slippers to go down for breakfast.

The best she could do was put on her shoes and socks back on and clamber down the stairs towards the wonderful smelling food. In front of the same seat she sat at last night, and early this morning, was a plate of sunny side up eggs and long, juicy, mouth-watering pieces of bacon.

“Thank you, Mr. Waterbut,” she murmured quietly, taking a seat and picking up the knife and fork.
Silence followed her words as Blenkinsop busied himself with cleaning mugs and Ginny began to eat. After a few moment of quiet, with the exception of the sound of Ginny’s cutlery scraping against the plate, Blenkinsop turned around and held out a hand which she took in confusion.

“Please Miss Weasley, call me Blen, all my friends do,” Blenkinsop said kindly, shaking her hand.
Ginny managed a small smile when Blen’s words sunk in. Obviously, he thought of her as a friend. She couldn’t help but wonder why though; all she had done was bother him with her problems. Blenkinsop Waterbut was a peculiar man.

“Please call me Ginny, Blen,” Ginny said, smiling again.

She finished her breakfast and pulled out her wallet to pay but Blen pushed it away.

“No need for that Ginny,” he said. “You don’t need to pay for anything.”

Ginny pulled out her wand from her pocket and stared at it for a moment before flicking it gently. Bubbles and soap suds covered the plate, but when they disappeared the plate was sparkling clean.

“Why thank you, Ginny!” Blen said warmly.

“No problem, Blen,” replied Ginny brightly.

They sat there for a moment before Blen said, “So, Ginny, do you want to talk more about last night?”

They were back to this again; it was a thought she had been trying not to remember.

“Ginny, are you glad that you found love with Harry?” he asked suddenly, catching her off guard.

She nodded. She was happy to have loved Harry. He had always been so brave. He had always been there to protect her. Not that she needed it, she could defend herself. But she still knew he would protect her if she needed it.

“See here Ginny, do you regret falling in love with Harry?” he asked, this time she had been waiting for him to say something more.

No, she didn’t regret falling in love with Harry. The time she had spent with him had been wonderful. The picnics down at the pond had been the best, with the most delicious turkey sandwiches she had ever eaten, because Harry had made them, without magic. Even the time she had fallen out of the oak tree had been time well-spent. Harry had carried her all the way up to the Burrow and into her room.

“Have you Ginny, ever heard the saying, ‘It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all?’” he asked curiously. “It was said by a Muggle, Alfred Lord Tennyson; couldn’t have put it better myself.”

The words sunk in; Blen was right. She didn’t regret falling in love with Harry. She was happy to have loved Harry before he died. Many a girl had a crush on him and said that they loved him. But she was the only one who had truly loved the one and only Harry Potter. No one could take that away from her, even if Harry was dead.

It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. It was true. She was happy that she had loved. As sad as she was that it was cut short, some people never have loved throughout in their entire lifetime.

She was lucky to have loved then to have never loved at all.

Ginny made her way around the bar to face Blenkinsop. She wrapped her arms around him and he patted her gently on the back with one of his hands.

“Oh thank you, Blen, you don’t know how you have helped me,” she cried.

Ginny pocketed her wand and opened the door to the road outside.

“I hope we meet again Blen, thank you very much,” she said softly before disappearing out the door.

Before she Disapparated, she turned to face the Green Dragon Inn and her mouth dropped. The entire building had vanished into thin air, not leaving a single trace.

With a crack, Ginny Weasley disappeared from the dusty road leading to nowhere and appeared in her home, the Burrow.

---

Her family had been so worried. When Molly Weasley had first spotted her daughter, she had wrapped her in a tight hug. However, afterwards she endured a very long lecture. Ginny never went looking for the Green Dragon Inn again; she knew she wouldn’t find it.

Love’s a funny thing. You think that once you find it, you’ll never loose it. Ginny thought that about Harry during their time together. She never really thought he’d be gone. But then again, she never thought she’d fall in love again.

Three years after Harry’s death and Ginny’s run-in with the Green Dragon’s owner, Blenkinsop Waterbut, Ginny met and grew to love a wizard she met in Diagon Alley. She ran several times into the man before Michael Richard finally asked her out on a date.

Nearly four years after they had started dating, Michael took their relationship to the next level and proposed. Ginny and Michael Richard lived happily at the Burrow.

No one would replace Harry is Ginny’s eyes. But that didn’t mean that she would never love someone else again.

Blenkinsop Waterbut’s words of wisdom still echoed distantly in her mind. She would never forget the man whose words helped her love again.

It is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all.