Keep Holding On





She lay on the ice-cold stone floor, a coppery taste flooding her mouth… blood. Her vision was blurred so that she could only see shadows moving and bright lights flashing. The world started to spin, a searing headache feeling as though it would split her forehead in two. All of a sudden, the screams, the cries, the noise of the battle itself, turned into a fuzzy roar in the back of her mind; in fact, the only thing she could hear clearly was the slow sound of her heartbeat pounding in her ears.





The scent of death entered her nostrils, filling her with exhaustion. Her eyelids grew heavy, making her believe that it was useless to keep struggling against the unavoidable. It made her feel powerless, as though she couldn’t fight any longer.





Roxanne was about to give in, but she had a reason to stay, at least long enough to bid farewell. So she breathed in heavily, in an attempt to regain some strength, and -- wincing from the pain-- she started to crawl towards a wall. Every movement she made hurt like a thousand knives slashing her into pieces, but she didn’t complain, and she barely whimpered softly. She kept moving, using every ounce of strength she had in her. She told herself it was worth it, and in her mind, she forced herself to move.





The further she moved, the further away her desired resting place seemed to be, so she just shut her eyes, denying the world’s complex existence, and kept moving. When she opened her eyes after ages in the dark, the cold rock wall seemed to be a bit closer, and her vision was slightly clearer, so she decided to keep crawling.





A few minutes and a lot of blood-coughing later, her numb hands touched the wall and, exhausted, she slumped against it.





She sighed, feeling a bit safer, and observed her diffused and surreal surroundings as if watching a film.





The dungeons were dark and hostile. The entire atmosphere was colourless, save from the spells that flashed all around, and the tension was so thick you could cut it with a Severing Charm.





There were Death Eaters and Aurors fighting to survive, showing off their skills and quick reflexes as they hurled spells and curses at each other, hoping the enemy would surrender as soon as possible. Sweat, blood and dirt hid their faces, turning them into nameless knights.





Roxanne kept watching in horror, when a particularly vicious scene caught her attention.





“Crucio!” A masked man screamed. A boy with pale blond hair fell to his knees and squirmed in pain. His silvery-grey eyes widened in shock as the pain overwhelmed his frail body.





“Perhaps this will teach you who you must be loyal to, Draco,” the masked man hissed like a cobra about to strike again.





Draco opened his mouth as if to say something, but shut it as a new wave of pain hit him. His blood-chilling scream erupted from him as his eyes filled up with tears.





“Hm, regretting our decision now, aren’t we?” the Death Eater mocked, his face contorted into a triumphant smirk.





Roxanne was certain that a thousand witty retorts crossed Draco’s mind. But as she watched him wincing in the floor, she knew he was too scared and in too much pain to voice any of them.





And so, he pleaded mercy instead.





“Father… please… stop it!” he choked out. Lucius’ simper widened.





“Yet another mistake, son,” he reprimanded “Malfoys never plead!”





With that, he lowered his wand, releasing the young man before him from his torture, and walked away...





Draco lay on the floor, panting and sore. Then, out of nowhere a soft, female voice called after him,





“Draco?”





Draco turned toward the voice. “Roxanne?” he called back, doing his best to remain calm as he rushed as best he could to her side.





Draco knelt beside Roxanne. Her once silky, ebony-coloured hair was now tangled and soaked in blood. She had a big bruise on her left cheek, tinting her creamy skin in crimson. But when he locked his eyes with hers… he couldn’t help it but remember the first time he ever drowned in those chocolate orbs…





Draco woke up, his head throbbing. He opened his eyes only to be met by a whiteness he knew as St. Mungo’s walls and the sun’s blinding light.





“Oh, crap! Can you just shut the damn blinds?” he demanded angrily.





“Whoa, you’re awake! And quite moody…” a trainee Healer, which was walking into the room examining a chart, exclaimed with a smirk.





She’s attractive, Draco thought with a sneer of his own.





The trainee’s hair was glossy and dark as the night, her skin seemed soft and slightly flushed. Still, she was just a trainee. “Didn’t you hear me?” Draco growled, “Shut the bloody blinds, trainee!”





The girl turned to face Draco, her eyes shimmering with anger as she glared at him, “I’m not a trainee. In fact I’m an intern healer, which is definitely different,” she snapped, “And I’m Healer Evergreen, by the way.”





“Now who’s moody?” Draco chuckled; her outburst quite pathetic in his mind. She barely pulled a face at him, so he continued to taunt her. “Are you even allowed to treat your patients in such way?” he asked without letting his smirk fade.





“I can do whatever I want,” she retorted.





“Wouldn’t they fire you?”





“No, I’m too talented and too useful. They need me,” she stated arrogantly.





“But I’m too powerful and wealthy,” he said with matching egotism.





“Well, I don’t know about that, but I do know what is on your forearm and if you don’t want me to call the Aurors, then you’ll let me do whatever I want.” she answered.





Draco’s eyes widened. He was taken aback by Healer Evergreen’s statement. So, out of an impulse, he grabbed her wrists and dragged her close. Her face was just centimeters away from his and he could feel her warm breath against his face. Healer Evergreen was breathing shakily, which meant Draco had the control of the situation. He smirked. “Look, you better remain silent, and let me explain myself before you do anything stupid,” he hissed. “Is it clear? Healer Evergreen?” he asked. With that, she looked up, locking her shimmering brown eyes with his icy grey ones. They made eye contact for what seemed like an eternity, but she looked away.





”It’s clear Mr. Malfoy,” she said with a halfhearted smile. ”And, please, just call me Roxanne”.





Draco smiled slightly at the memory, but was snapped back to reality when Roxanne started to cough and shake violently. He grabbed her by the shoulders to soften her trembling and laid her head to rest on his lap.





He stared at her for a second. Her eyes were squeezed shut as she fought to make herself stop trembling.





She’s always fighting against herself, Draco mused.





Certainly, Roxanne always forced herself to do what was right and not what was easy or what felt good. “The key for success is to allow your mind to be the boss, not your heart or your guts!” she used to say. No wonder why she had been a Slytherin.





“You okay?” Draco asked when Roxanne stopped coughing, trying to sound confident.





“Yeah… I’m fine,” Roxanne answered, smirking weakly.





Draco smiled at her awkwardly, hoping to look reassuring instead of scared. He didn’t want to lose Roxanne.





Every time he found something he liked or even loved, life just snatched it away from him, mocking him shamelessly. That’s why he refused to get fond of anything, but with Roxanne… he just couldn’t help it. And now, life was just stealing her away, as always.





“What happened to you?” He asked suddenly.





“A spell hit me. It’s nothing, really,” she answered, trying to sound nonchalant.





Draco gave her a look that clearly said, ‘You can’t fool me’.





“Fine. It is a bit of something,” she admitted grudgingly.





Draco smiled at her childish attitude. She was so competitive and strong-minded, she would never admit weakness.





“You look like crap,” he teased while brushing a strand of black hair away from her eyes.





“Why, thank you!” she said sarcastically. “But I do look better than you.”





“That’s not possible,” Draco told her with a smile.





Roxanne smiled faintly at Draco. She was amazed with how he just knew how to brighten the darkest moments, to make her feel loved and safe. He was everything she wanted, everything she needed. With him by her side, she felt like she could make it through.





Draco held Roxanne’s hand and squeezed it gently. “You’re going to be all right…” he whispered, more to himself than to Roxanne.





“Yeah… I will,” she answered, knowing that it was a lie.





Draco stared at her, and allowed another memory to cross his mind…





Draco and Roxanne were worn out. They had been running from the Death Eaters for a long time.





“I think we’ve lost them,” Draco panted when they reached a clearing in the Forbidden Forest.





Roxanne turned to make sure Draco wasn’t mistaken. “Yeah, I can’t see them anywhere.”





They slowed down and flopped to the ground.





Roxanne shut her eyes and, trying to force her heartbeat to slow down, she took a deep breath. The air smelled of wet grass and herbs, filling her lungs with a fresh scent of calmness. The whisper of the trees and the echoing sound of rushing water was all that could be heard and it felt peculiarly soothing. She allowed the soft, cool breeze to caress her skin and ruffle her hair. Within seconds, she was composed.





While Roxanne calmed herself down, Draco took the time to observe his surroundings.





It was late, around midnight. The clearing was surrounded by imposing trees of different species, trapping the place in a cage made by Mother Nature.


The silver moon shone brighter than ever and the velvety-black night sky was sprinkled with dazzling celestial diamonds.





“Look at those stars,” Draco observed casually.





Roxanne opened her eyes and snickered, “You sound like one of those sappy Muggle films.”





Draco drew her close and gave her a mock glare.





Roxanne looked straight into his silver eyes. To her, they were his own mastered version of the Imperius Curse.





“Comments later,” she commanded.





Draco’s eyebrows arched in bewilderment. But he couldn’t voice any of his questions, since his words were muffled by Roxanne’s lips attacking his own passionately. Draco’s eyes closed and he kissed back, but he was interrupted by Roxanne laughing heartily against his mouth.





“What’s wrong with you!?” he hissed. Offended, he pushed her away.





“I-I’m sorry,” she stuttered, “I t-tend react oddly when I’m nervous.”





“Nervous?” he asked, his anger subsiding slightly.





“It’s just that… I kissed you!” she blurted out, “Without your consent! And I don’t even…”





“… know how to kiss properly.” Draco finished for her teasingly. But, much to his surprise, Roxanne nodded and dropped her gaze to her shoes as a strong blush crept to her cheeks.





“Well then,” Draco said with a smug grin, “they say practice makes perfect.” And with that, he captured her full, pink lips with his own.





Draco’s mind floated back to the present. He stared at Roxanne and a knot formed in his throat when he saw his girl, once full of life, but now beaten and tired.





He leaned forward to capture her lips and relive one of their sweetest memories. But when their lips finally touched, the kiss tasted of bittersweet farewell dressed with blood’s coppery taste. It was just then when Draco realized that this was their last kiss, the last moment they’d share together.





This awareness forced Draco to make this last kiss the best, as he started kissing Roxanne with more strength and zeal. She kissed back just as fervently, and the bittersweet taste faded, letting a in a new sensation.





The world around them disappeared, letting them be, if only for a moment, careless and unafraid.





Their lips kept dancing vehemently for what seemed like years; but after a while, Roxanne’s strength grew scarce and they had to separate.





“I’ll miss you,” she admitted, tears forming in her hazel eyes.





“But you’re not going anywhere!” Draco denied stubbornly, shaking his head. Even though he knew she was going to leave him soon.





“Draco…” she whispered.





“How dare you’re leaving me? After all I’ve done for you!”





Roxanne didn’t say anything. He had indeed done many things for her.





“I gave up myself for you!” Draco yelled, extending his forearm. He had a huge pearly scar where once there was a Dark Mark, where once there was another Draco.





Roxanne blinked slowly, tears finally rolling down her cheeks. He had sacrificed, he had changed, and she was just leaving him. She wasn’t fighting for him.





“I’m sorry,” she said in a strangled voice.





They sat in an awkward silence for a moment. Roxanne was terrified, and for the first time in her life, she had no idea of how to make herself fight. Uncertainty was not something Roxanne was familiar to, and now, it was killing her.





“I know you are sorry,” Draco said, breaking the silence. “I’m sorry too.”





Roxanne still didn’t know what to do or what to say, so she let Draco do the talking.





“I know this is not your fault…”





“But it isn’t yours either,” she said softly





“I know. But I wish there were something I could do.”





“There is.”





Draco looked at her, his eyes full of a feeling Roxanne hadn’t seen there before: hope.





“I wish he was here and I could do this myself, but you’ll have to do this for me,” she went on.





“What is it?”





“Say goodbye to Wylie for me, take care of him and… tell him I’ll miss him,”


Draco nodded, his eyes burning with tears.





“Tell him that his big sister will always be proud of him, no matter what,”





“I will.”





Draco finally gave in. He was too tired to keep his façade anymore. He looked intently at Roxanne, and let out a single tear.





Roxanne wiped away the tear in Draco’s cheek and smirked weakly.





“I wasn’t that wrong,” she whispered.





“What are you talking about?” Draco asked, bewildered.





“That I wasn’t mistaken after all,” she explained “I’ve always known that your eyes were made out of melted silver under an ice layer. And now, I’m witnessing how the ice is finally melting.”





Draco hugged her strongly, burying his head in the crook of her neck.





“Keep holding on! Just stay strong!” he mumbled to her soft skin.





Roxanne hugged him back and breathed his intoxicating scent for the last time. “Yeah… you know I’ll make it through,” she reassured him.





And with that, she stopped breathing.














AN: Embarrassingly enough, the ‘Kiss in the Forbidden Forest’ passage was inspired in my own first kiss. Pathetic isn’t it?





Anyways, I hope you enjoyed this :D It was my very first fic, and I'm willing to improve as much as possible, so any constructive criticism will be greatly appreciated. Leave a review if you have time!