Stronger
by Marauder by Midnight

“Do you see what’s she’s wearing?”

“…clashes horribly…”

“What a loony!”

Luna smiled at each in turn, not at all bothered by the giggles and comments. In fact, she swelled with pride just slightly and fought back the urge to do a twirl right then and there to show off her new shocking pink oversized raincoat featuring her new favorite band, the Dancing Carrots.

Even in the crowded hallway, Luna Lovegood could spot that messy head of raven-black hair. She let out a gasp and shot her frantically waving hand up, her elbow knocking into the face of a young second-year with several suitcases. “Harry! Harry, wait up!” Eager to reach her Gryffindor friends, Luna began shoving her way through, her blue eyes narrowing in on her target.

Suddenly, that cute, slightly egg-shaped head swiveled sharply away from Luna to run in the opposite direction; if Luna didn’t know better, she would’ve thought that Harry Potter was running away from her. Impossible, she knew; perhaps his fool of a friend Ron Weasley had forgotten his library books again like last time.

“Talk to you later, Harry!” she yelled above the sea of students. “I’ve got a free period right now, so I’ll be on the grounds if you need me!”

“Hey, shut it, Loony Luna!” Suddenly, Luna felt the tail of her coat lift above her head. As Harry’s head bobbed out of sight, a blur of hot pink sailed down from above and blinded her. Surprised, Luna tripped on her untied shoes and collided painfully with the stone floors, the sounds of her fall and laughter ringing loudly in her ears.

Under the safety of her coat, Luna allowed her usually indifferent face to cringe in hurt and embarrassment. For a moment, Luna felt a sting behind her eyes, but she knew no tears would fall. After all, this wasn’t the first time, was it?

Luna checked her expression, reverting back to her safe, neutral self, and removed the coat from her face. She looked past the grins and unabashed mockery all around her and continued to the Hogwarts grounds for a walk through the snow.

Luna’s lips turned upward more, her wispy smile reacting to the winter that frosted the grounds. She sighed as she felt the snow crunch below her boots and ignored the change in the wind.

The grounds, nearly deserted, was her favorite place this time of year. Some seemed satisfied with curling up by the fireside with their hot mug of chocolate. Others insisted on disturbing the pure even blanket with their fierce battles and races to get wet the fastest.

Not Luna.

When Luna walked past the greenhouses, she began talking.

“Hi, Mother. I’m here again for our annual walk, just like always.” Luna admired the sight of her breath, expelling from her mouth as a dragon’s flame, and quickly melting into thin air.

“My coat? Oh, I made it myself. The Dancing Carrots are all the rage these days, Mother. They’re a real hit. Father had met them last week for an interview, and once they’re published in this month’s Quibbler, I’ll bet my classmates will be asking me for one of these.” Giving into impulse, Luna twirled.

“My friends. Well, I made new ones this year. You know Harry Potter, the Boy-Who-Lived? He’s my new friend. Oh, and his best friends, Hermione and Ron. They’re really great too. I told Daddy about them, and he’s real happy that I’m finally out and about.” She laughed, remembering that joke Ron Weasley had said on the train.

“Christmas. Well, I’d like to go back home to Daddy, but you know I wouldn’t. A promise is a promise.” She paused. “Daddy begged me to go home this year for the holidays. He never had before, but now he wants me to go. ‘Please, Luna. Let us be together for Christmas again.’”

Luna frowned. “I told him why I couldn’t go. I told him I had to talk to you again, that this is the only time each year I’d get to. I don’t think he remembers that you left the day before the first snowfall of the year. He doesn’t understand, really, Mum, that we can’t all have what we want for Christmas.”

She walked alone in silence, listening to the satisfying crunch. She turned her head to look behind her. One, not two, sets of boot prints trailed after her, the ridges of her boots perfectly and fragilely preserved. The wind whipped through her hair, sending the blonde streams in every single direction.

“I know you’ve always said to me that I shouldn’t look into the past, that there’s nothing I could do.” She faced forward reluctantly. “But…I wasn’t that strong, Mother.”

She turned back to look at the footprints behind her, this time with remorse. “I know you can hear me, and I know you exist. Just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean it’s not there.”

An icy breeze wrapped itself around Luna’s neck. “I hope I’m not too great of a disappointment to you up there, you and all your friends and family in the clouds.” Luna sighed. “I’ll do the best I can, Mum, but I can only do this one step at a time. Otherwise I’d just trip all over again.”

That stingy sensation behind her eyes started again. “Forgive me, Mother, but this will be my last walk with you. You are right, as always, and I’ve got to stop looking into the past. I’ll owl Father and tell him I’ll go to him for the rest of the holidays if he wants me. But, Mother, you’ve given me the best Christmas gift ever every year, one of the most unique I’ve ever received. You sent me your presence and reassured me that there’s always someone there to listen.”

Luna smiled tenderly. “It just can’t always be you.”

Luna closed her eyes as the wind kissed her cheeks and made her way through uncharted snow back to the castle without looking behind again.

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End notes: This chapter follows as closely to canon as my knowledge of the Harry Potter universe as of December 21, 2006 allows. Any information revealed to be false by Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows will not be changed.

Reviews are graciously accepted and appreciated.