Talks With Plants and Crumple-Horned Snorkacks by Pondering


I watched in bemusement as Luna stomped around in the mud, a merry wreath tangled in the weaves of her hair. It seemed to be getting dirty, but she did not mind. Instead, I listened carefully to her mirthful laughter as she batted off creatures that only she could see.

The scratch of my quill paused for a moment because I was too busy observing her. She jumped around wildly, her boots making squelching sounds as they impacted into the earth again. She created strange calling sounds, as if trying to attract one of her imaginary animals out of hiding.

I smiled to myself, my research quite forgotten right now. Luna Lovegood’s methods would most likely prove futile in the end, but for the moment I was content. The rewrite of my grandfather’s book was going well, and most importantly, we were enjoying ourselves.

With a small sigh, Luna dragged herself out of the mud, leaving a trail from the riverbank to the bench where I was meant to be working. “They are fearful of me,” she told me, nodding seriously. “They do not wish to come out of hiding around me.”

“What were you looking for?” I asked, surprised for a moment that I was actually curious.

“The Crumple-Horned Snorkacks are here,” she told me, craning her neck in various directions. “I can hear them.”

During the conversation’s pause I tried to listen for the creatures too, but if they existed, they made no sound.

“I think we should go inside,” she said, pointing to the sun. “It’s getting quite late.”

I glanced at the sky and blinked in astonishment. The clouds were the hazy pink colour of sunset, and I looked down at my parchment and realised that the little light left did not allow me to read the words I had written.

“Come on, Rolf,” she insisted, pulling gently on my arm. “I know you would spend all day outside if it was possible, but we really should go in. We haven’t even decorated the cabin yet.”

“Decorated the cabin?” I stuttered. “For what purpose?”

Luna fixed me with a light-hearted stare. “Don’t be silly, it’s Christmas. We have to decorate. Otherwise there’ll be no spirit.”

“I’ve never been into celebrating much for Christmas,” I said as she led us up the rambling overgrown path that ran to the cabin we were staying at for this phase of research.

She just gave me a mysterious smile. “You have to feel the spirit to enjoy it. Otherwise it’s just like an ordinary day. With presents,” she added as an afterthought.

“All right,” I resigned, “how are we going to decorate it then?”

Again with that same smile. It unnerved me every time she looked at me like that. “I’ll show you.”

The front of the cabin was littered with plants that I could not name, but Luna seemed to know what they were. They quietly fell victims to some well placed Severing Charms and as I watched them lie on the ground, I imagined their screams of horror and pain.

Luna had some plants gathered in her hands now, and with the application of a simple charm she held another wreath and placed it on my head. I shuddered and tried to flinch away from her.

“What’s wrong?” she asked. “Don’t worry, it’s only the mistletoe that’s infested with Nargles.”

I nodded, and my mouth moved noiselessly. The words that I wanted to say withered and die in the space between Luna and I. I was as silent and as helpless as the plants in her arms.

“Ever since you said we would be staying here for Christmas I started coming back to plant these,” she said, gesturing to what I now see is a small festive garden. “It was a hard task, as I’m not much of a botanist, but at least it’ll be easy to decorate the cabin now,” she told me happily.

Suddenly, I felt quite queasy. The plants were calling to me, calling out to me to save them, but I closed my eyes so I wouldn’t have to see their suffering. “Yes,” I said out loud, “I’m not much of a botanist either.” It was the truth. I would never be able to work with plants, because now I knew they hurt too much. Maybe that is why I invested my time in studying animals, which, at the very least, cried out if they are in pain. Most of them can even fight back when threatened.

“Are you uncomfortable?” she asked with a piercing gaze. For a moment I feel as if she is looking straight into my soul, as if she is feeling the hurt of my heart.

I shook my head. “It’s just a bit chilly out here, that’s all.”

Luna shook her head and placed the second wreath on her head. She looked quite silly with two of them on her head, but at the same time, she looked quite beautiful. I wondered why the first wreath did not bother me as much as the other plants, but then I swore I could hear the second one calling out to me. I’m happy here, it said.

I looked at the other plants Luna had bundled in her arms, and no longer were they screaming in agony, but they were laughing with the same mirthful laugh I had heard from Luna many times before.

I stumbled into the room and Luna mumbled something about holly, and she wrapped the plant around her hands, put a chair on top of the table and clambered up so she could attempt to reach the high ceiling. She balanced comically on the edge, and for a moment I pondered telling her that it would be quite a bit safer just to use magic to attach the decorations, but something put me off. The look of determination on her face as she wrestled with the support beam amused me, yet at the same time, inspired me.

“Do you need some help?” I asked politely, as it seemed the correct thing to do.

She looked down at me and almost lost her balance. “No, I am quite fine for now,” she assured me. Finally, the holly was hanging from the beams and she leaped down from the tabletop.

With a small wicked smile forming on my face, I took her second wreath and place it proudly on my head, and it does not seem to protest at me at all.

Luna looked mildly astonished, but only for a second. “You look nice,” she told me, her eyes skimming over the edges of my new adornment.

The other plant in her hand, apparently, was ivy. She proceeded to drape it over the mantelpiece and I wondered if it would catch fire, dangling over the fireplace like that. But she had the foresight to wipe away the loose tendrils and tuck them back next to the wall.

I had never watched someone decorate the house with plants before, and I wondered if Luna was doing it the way it was usually done. But did it really matter? Luna had the knack for making the unorthodox seem beautiful.

Her arms were nearly empty, and she held one remaining plant. Even I, with my limited experience with plants could tell instantly what it was. “I thought you didn’t like mistletoe?” I groaned.

“I made sure the Nargles wouldn’t get this one,” she said, standing on the tips of her toes in a futile attempt to reach the top of the doorframe.

“Allow me,” I said, interrupting her limited progress. After what I swore was a small pout, which I must have imagined, as Luna does not pout, she handed me the mistletoe. As I was considerably taller than her I could affix it easily. “Why do you want to hang mistletoe?” I asked, rubbing my strained arm muscles. All right, maybe I wasn’t quite as tall as I had imagined.

Luna shrugged, then flashed me a hopeful smile. “It has its uses.”

I tried to think about the meaning behind her words, but trying to decipher anything said by Luna is a hard task, so I soon gave up. Instead, the now hanging mistletoe whispered to me. I could not hear what it is saying, do not want to hear what it was saying, as that would admit that plants actually seemed to want to converse with me. But the mistletoe didn’t seem too focused on trying to attract my attention and instead laughed cheekily into my ear.

I thought I was going quite mad. I had never spent this much time next to plants, apart from when they were naturally growing outside. Were they meant to talk? Really, I only had one person that I could ask. “Luna,” I whispered, glancing back at the mistletoe. Was it a figment of my imagination, or was it really glaring back at me? “Is it strange for me to be hearing plants talk?”

Her face furrowed in thought, and after she pondered my question she slowly shook her head. “No, it’s perfectly normal. After all, the animals talk with me.”

I nodded, not really understanding what she was trying to say.

“Ever since we’ve been at the cabin, I keep hearing the call of the Crumple-Horned Snorkacks the moment I set foot outside. But then, they’re nowhere to be found. I supposed that they were just playing games with me, but then I learnt that they are extremely shy of humans and that they have been badly treated in the past by them.” She looked at me, and I could see traces of tears forming in the edges of her misty grey eyes. “Maybe it’s better if they’re never found.”

I tried to give her what comfort I could, as I knew it was one of her life’s dreams to find a Crumple-Horned Snorkack. But when I attempted to reassure her, she blew off my words and instead turned and asked me a question. “What do the plants say to you?”

I would have never told anyone else in fear of them thinking that I was quite mad, but Luna, I felt, could be trusted. “At first they were screaming as though they had been slain,” I told her, and her eyes widened in surprise. “But now, they seem happy.”

We are, the hangings told me.

I smiled back at them and gave them a jaunty little wave that I was not quite sure they could see. “I’m glad that you did this, Luna, I would never have known that…that plants could talk otherwise,” I said appreciatively. “That…they’re happy, and we’re happy, it gives me…what did you call it? Holiday spirit. In truth, I’ve never looked forward to Christmas quite so much.”

I looked at the ivy and the way it seemed to wrap its way around the fireplace, and then I nearly hurt my neck by looking up to watch the holly. “The holly and the ivy. They’re beautiful, Luna.” I smiled wolfishly at her, and she smiled back. “I never knew that decorating could be so fun.”

Luna nods. “It’s amazing what you can find fun or fulfilling when you’re willing just to give it a go.” Suddenly, it seemed as though she was leaning towards me, and I backed away from her slightly. Something caught my attention out of the corner of my eye. I looked out of the window and nearly died of shock. A creature that I could only presume to be a Crumple-Horned Snorkack smiled mournfully at me, and my head emptied of all coherent thought.

“Luna,” I gibbered, grabbing hold of her sleeve, “there’s something outside the window.”

But she just smiled and didn't even look in the direction of my arm. Instead, she tugged on my sleeve and she caused me to look up. We had somehow wound up underneath the mistletoe. The Crumple-Horned Snorkack seemed to wave, and I tried to attract Luna’s attention again, but she would not give it.

With a small flurry of movement, her lips brushed mine for barely a second, but I could still feel their warmth on my own. “Happy Christmas, Rolf,” she murmured. “What did you want to show me?”

“There…there’s a Crumple-Horned Snorkack right there,” I stuttered, pointing out the window. We turned around to look but all we could see were the rustling of the leaves. It was gone.

Luna smiled sadly, her eyes were almost defeated. “Don’t be silly, Rolf,” she whispered, and then painfully, the words came. “There’s no such thing as Crumple-Horned Snorkacks.”

It hurt to hear her say it, and I looked at the plants to give me some quiet support. But they said nothing. The plants were only ever plants, after all. Then it struck me that anything could exist, if someone believed it did.

“Luna,” I said, grasping one of her hands quickly in mine, “don’t ever stop believing.”

She smiled at me, her face full of non-verbal thanks. “What are you talking about?” she asked. “I never will.”

Just to make sure, I had one last question. “What are you going to do tomorrow?”

Her face broke out into a wide grin. “Look for Crumple-Horned Snorkacks, of course.”

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A/N: After reading the interview with JKR about Luna’s life post DH, it was revealed that she ended up marrying a naturalist called Rolf, who is Newt Scamander’s grandson. It was also noted that she, at some point, stopped believing in Crumple-Horned Snorkacks. Does she still fully believe in them at the end of this fic? I do not know. But anyway, just thought I’d make note of some of the post-DH interview material for those who were unaware of it.