"Where's Neville?" Ron groaned, turning on the couch to look around. Harry smoothed his unruly hair down and turned to look at the boy's staircase, as if he'd come down any moment. The Gryffindor common-room was all abuzz. It was still early in the year, and the anxiety of new and more challenging classes had almost everyone suffering sleepless nights. Nobody remembered whose idea it was to have a game of Truth or Dare, but almost everyone was down for it. Everyone except Harry and Neville. Harry was only in it because Ron called him chicken. Neville was quite obviously stalling upstairs.

"Oh, I'll get him," Ginny sighed as she trudged up the stairs to the boy's dormitory.

"That's just not right!" Ron said indignantly. "Girls can come into our dorm anytime they like, but if we even set foot on their staircase, we get thrown down on our arses!"

Hermione, who was sitting on a pouf by the fireplace, cracked up laughing. Ron gave her an angry look, which just made her laugh harder.

"What would you want to come to the girl's dormitory for anyway?" Hermione quipped. Suddenly, a few of the younger Gryffindor girls behind her began snickering to themselves, causing Hermione to blush indignantly. A moment later, Ginny returned down the staircase with a very anxious-looking Neville shuffling behind her.

Luna Lovegood was still standing by the portrait entrance, leaning her head to one side as though she might fall over. She seemed to be in deep thought, twirling a lock of her pale blonde hair in her fingers. Luna was a Ravenclaw of course, but Harry knew she was teased by the other Ravenclaws, and had invited her to join them. When he'd found her earlier, she was on the second floor casually trying to toss a wizard's hat onto the head of a statue of a particularly haggard witch.

"Luna," called Hermione, "Why don't you, er… come sit and join us?"

She smiled absently as she sat cross-legged on the floor next to Hermione.

"Here, I made you something." Luna reached out a closed fist to Hermione, who stuck out her open hand warily. Into it, Luna dropped what looked like a mish-mash of rubber bands. Hermione picked it up to inspect it, seeing that it was indeed a braided rope of rubber bands, about the length of a bracelet. Luna smiled warmly, waiting for Hermione to put it on.

"Thank you, Luna," Hermione said, a surprised look on her face. "It's… lovely."

As she tied the band around her wrist, Neville took a seat on the couch next to Harry and Ron. He gave Harry a pained sideways glance, and Harry reached over and gave him a pat on the back.

"Alright, who's first?" Parvati said, rubbing her hands together gleefully.

"Oh, may I?" Luna asked politely, raising her hand in the air.

Ginny shot Hermione a look, and then pulled Luna's hand down. "You do know how to play, right?"

"I'm familiar," Luna breezed happily. "Ginny, truth or dare?"

"Er…truth!"

Everyone groaned, but Ginny just gave a shrug. Suddenly, Ron balled up a piece of parchment and threw it at her head.

"That wasn't your History essay, was it?" Harry asked.

"No, yours.�

Ginny threw the paper ball back at Ron, hitting him smartly in the eye and turned her back to him. "Go ahead, Luna, ask me something."

Luna looked upwards, as though a clever question would hit her in the center of the forehead like a raindrop. Suddenly, she leaned toward Ginny with an eyebrow raised.

"Are you, at all, hungry?"

The group groaned once again. Ginny laughed. "Sure, I could eat something. There goes my turn, thanks Luna!"

"Your turn, Ginny!" Parvati said impatiently, braiding a lock of her hair. Ginny had managed to find a half-empty box of Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans in one of her pockets and was trying to pull it open.

"Alright, I pick…Ron. Truth or Dare!"

Harry put his face down so his best friend wouldn't see him grinning. Ron's freckled face was nearly as red as his hair. They both knew what kind of question he'd be asked if he picked "truth".

"Dare!" Ron squeaked, a little too loudly. Ginny seemed slightly disappointed, but her grin widened once again.

"I dare you to wear your underwear on your head for the rest of the night!"

Ron gasped with shock and looked down at his lap.

"No," Ginny said with a scowl. "Leave those where they are."

Ron grumbled to himself as he walked up the stairs to the boy's dormitory, a chorus of laughter behind him. Harry kept his face down, not only because he was laughing, but because he didn't dare draw attention to himself. I can't decide which is worse, he thought to himself. With Truth, I have to say something totally embarrassing. With Dare, I have to do something utterly humiliating. He slowly tried to sink deeper into the couch.

As Ron came back down the stairs, the laughter rose up once again. He wore a light blue pair of boxers on his head, the legs sticking up like short, square bunny ears. Ginny looked over at Hermione and gave her a quick wink.

"Ronald," called Luna, oblivious to the laughter surrounding her. "Your hat doesn't match." This just made everyone laugh harder.

As Ron took his seat on the couch once again, he looked around the common room venomously. He was obviously going to take it out on whoever he picked next…

Ron straightened the light blue boxers on his head as he looked around the room for the next Truth or Dare victim. He was still blushing furiously from having to wear his underpants like a headdress when all of a sudden he heard a muffled snickering. He jerked his head around to look at his best friend seated on the couch next to him. Harry was turned away, chuckling helplessly into his shoulder.

“Oh, think it’s funny, do you?� Ron fumed. “Bloody hilarious!� He popped Harry on the back of the head. “Your turn then, Harry. Truth or dare!�
Harry immediately stopped laughing as his stomach did a flip-flop. He’s going to ask me something embarrassing… probably about a girl…

“Dare!� Harry sputtered, trying his best to look unaffected.

Much to his dismay, however, Ron grinned wickedly.

“Alright, Chuckles. I dare you to wear nothing but your underwear for the rest of the game! Top that!�

Hoots and hollers filled the common room as Harry’s face went pale. Slowly, his trademark spectacles began to fog up. Even Neville, who looked somewhat relieved, was smiling.

Lavender and Parvati were clapping furiously. “Off with your trousers, then, you naughty boy!� Parvati announced. Lavender laughed so hard she began to choke.

“Fine,� Harry said loudly as he unbuttoned his shirt. “But everything comes full circle, Ron! You’re gonna get-�

Harry was interrupted by loud whistling as he removed his shirt. By now, Harry’s face was as red as Ron’s hair. He pulled some of the pillows off the couch and put them in front of him as he quickly kicked off his trousers. Though he tried to sit with the throw pillow in his lap, his boxers were still visible. They were dark blue and dotted with golden snitches.

Harry waved his hand in the air, trying to allay the noise.

“It’s alright,� he said with his bravest voice. “If I can face Voldemort and live, then I can certainly sit here in my underpants for an evening.� Just then, Harry looked up to see Hermione whispering something into Ginny’s ear, who was blushing furiously.

“Truth or dare, Hermione?� Harry asked, folding his arms self-consciously over his bare chest. Hermione froze, quite taken aback.

“My turn already? Oh…� her eyes darted around the room, looking for anything with which to stall. Luna had her head leaned forward and seemed to be counting how many hairs she had on her head. Hermione helplessly started to mumble “Truth�, but Ginny elbowed her smartly in the side.

“Dare! Dare, then.�

This time it was Harry’s turn to adopt a wicked grin.

“I dare you to kiss Ron!�

“That all right with you, Lavender?� Ginny asked loudly with a smirk. “You look as though you might lay an egg!�

It was true. Lavender’s face was twisted up in complete horror, while Ron was gaping in shock. He’d forgotten all about the underwear on his head, and turned to look incredulously at Harry.

“You…. You….�

But before Ron could speak any further, Hermione stood up and strode quickly to the couch. She leaned down and kissed Ron firmly but briefly right on the lips. The room echoed in gasps. Hermione turned quickly on her heel and sat down next to Ginny. She looked down at the floor to hide her crimson face.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?� Hermione said in her calmest voice. Ron’s face was still frozen in shock. Harry cleared his throat, but got no reaction from Ron.

Hermione, eager to change the subject, turned to face Lavender, who was still looking quite disturbed.

“Truth or dare, Lavender?� Hermione felt better instantly, as she’d never liked Lavender at all.

Lavender looked absolutely livid. Her mind swirled with what Hermione might dare to ask her if she picked Truth.

“Dare!� she squeaked, looking Hermione intently in the eyes.

Hermione reached back and snatched Ginny’s half-full box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans.

“Hey, I was eating those!�

Hermione paid no attention. “Alright, Lav-Lav. I dare you to eat the rest of these beans in one mouthful!�

Lavender brazenly ripped the box out of Hermione’s hands and emptied into her mouth. Suddenly, her face turned quite pale.

“What’s it taste like?� Parvati asked cautiously, scooting away from her friend.

Lavender chewed for a moment with a disgusted grimace. “Coffee…grass… ginger… bacon… pomegranate… VOMIT!� Clutching her hands to her mouth, Lavender ran up the stairs to the girls dormitory. When Lavender finally descended the stairs again a few minutes later, looking quite disheveled, everyone in the Gryffindor common room was still in the grip of a laughing fit. Lavender sat down next to Parvati again, and icily eyed the room.

“Bloody Hell,� Ron said quietly aside to Harry. “Someone’s really in for it now!�

“Luna, truth or dare?�

Luna lifted her head up and beamed, looking quite honored.

“Dare?�

Hermione was quite fretful for her oblivious friend as Lavender smiled viciously.

“Alright, Loony, I dare you to ask Professor Snape if he’s a vampire... in tomorrow’s potions class!�

Parvati turned suddenly and grabbed the throw-pillow which Harry was holding onto so dearly, and whipped it at Lavender’s face.

“Oh, that’s so cruel! Snape will absolutely murder her!�

“I don’t mind,� Luna explained. “I already know for a fact that he is. A confession would do well in The Quibbler.�

Ron laughed mockingly as he pulled his boxers a bit further back on his head. “How can he possibly be a vampire? He goes around in daylight, you know!�

“Sun-block,� Luna replied.

Suddenly, Ginny leaned over and whispered something in Luna’s ear. On the couch next to Ron, Neville had begun to get nervous. No one had picked him yet, but he feared that was about to change.

“Neville,� Luna asked musingly. “Truth or dare?�

Neville turned to look at his two friends on the couch with him; one in nothing but his underwear and the other one wearing his as a hat. Ron and Harry glowered at him.

“D-d-dare,� Neville stuttered.

Luna closed her eyes in thought, wondering what dare she might ask of Neville. Ginny leaned over and began whispering in her ear again.
“That’s cheating!� Ron yelled with a very high pitch. Ginny took off her shoe and threw it at him, hitting him squarely in the chest.

“Neville, I dare you,� Luna said in a reciting and melodic voice, “to call Draco Malfoy a scumbag arse-face tomorrow.�

More whispering from Ginny.

“To his face.�

Even more whispering from Ginny.

“In front of everyone.�

Neville’s face fell, whilst everyone else let out “Oooohs� and “Ahhhhhs�.

“Don’t worry, Neville,� Harry said in a hushed tone. “We’ll back you up.�

Lavender and Parvati squealed to themselves. “This is going to be hilarious."

Finally, everyone agreed that it was late and they’d all head to bed. Harry immediately stood up and tried to pull his trousers back on as fast as possible, falling back frantically onto the couch. Ron, still blushing from that kiss from Hermione, trudged sullenly up the stairs to his dorm. Harry caught up with him, still pulling his arms into his sleeves, and ripped the boxers off of Ron’s head.

“What in Merlin's name have we gotten into?�

Ron and Harry walked into the Great Hall, Ron with his hands shoved in his pockets. Suddenly, he elbowed his Harry in the ribs.

“Sit next to me today, will you Harry?� Ron said with a timid voice. “I don’t want to end up next to…�

“It’s alright,� Harry said with a laugh. Ron frowned. After the kiss Ron had received from Hermione the night before, he knew breakfast would be quite awkward.

“But what’ll you do if she sits across from you?� This made Ron blush harder.

Harry and Ron got to the table pretty early, with Neville just behind them. Neville didn’t ask any questions when Ron yanked him into the seat next to him. When Harry and Neville flanked Ron on both sides, he was finally comfortable enough to dig into his heaping breakfast. A few minutes later, however, they were surprised to see Hermione and Ginny come in with Parvati and Lavender at their sides. They came to the table and sat down across from the three boys. Ron stared intensely at his food as if no one else existed.

Ginny slid onto the bench, giving Hermione a weird sideways glance. Parvati and Lavender had never sat with them before.

“Morning, Mister Naked and Sir Undie-Hat,� Ginny said plainly to Harry and Ron. Harry couldn’t help but laugh while Ron accidentally dribbled pumpkin juice onto his robes.

“So, Neville,� Lavender said with a coy grin. “You remember your dare, don’t you?�

Neville’s face went pale. Unfortunately, he did remember.

“Yes, er… Draco…� Neville turned his head ever-so-slightly towards the Slytherin table. They were all talking amongst themselves, Draco waving his hands about and smiling with that evil, pinched face of his. Neville began to whimper.

“You don’t have to do it now,� said Harry. “Wait till after second class, when we have a break. Ron and I will go with you.�

Hermione’s eyes widened. “We have Potions as second class today, with the Ravenclaws!�

They all turned to look over at the Ravenclaw table, where Luna Lovegood was sitting alone. As every day, none of the other Ravenclaws would dare sit near her. She was chewing her breakfast obliviously and swinging her legs, as though it was a day like any other.

“Do you think she’ll do it?� Parvati hissed wickedly. “Do you think she’ll ask Professor Snape if he’s a vampire?�

“Why not?� Ron said suddenly, not looking up from his scrambled eggs. “She probably would’ve asked him anyway, she’s bonkers.�

As they filed into the Potions classroom, everyone was so distracted that they found it difficult to find their seats. Hermione and Neville grabbed their usual desk together, while Ron and Harry sat down in the back. Parvati gave a quick smile to her sister Padma, who was in Ravenclaw with Luna. She’d obviously told her sister what would go down in class. When Luna ambled in, everyone tried not to look at her. She sat down at an empty desk in the middle and began drawing circles in the air with her finger.

As Professor Snape had not arrived yet, many of the students were buzzing amongst themselves. Two Ravenclaw girls, Connie and Nikita, were whispering amongst themselves and pointing at Luna. The girls looked quite alike, both being short with dark brown hair and brown eyes. Nikita said something in Connie's ear, causing her to burst into giggles.

Padma began snapping her fingers, trying to get her sister's attention, but Parvati was busy talking to Lavender. Finally Lavender pointed Padma out.

“Remind her!� Padma mouthed.

“What?� Parvati mouthed back.

“Remind her, stupid!� Padma mouthed, her eyes furrowed.

“Sod off!�

Padma frowned as Connie snickered behind her.

Suddenly, the door flew open with a whoosh. It was like their voices had been sucked out of their throats as Snape strode quickly to the front of the class. He turned sharply on his heel and demanded that they have their cauldrons out and turn to page 635. For a moment, there were only the sounds of metal scraping and textbook pages fluttering. Suddenly, Luna raised her hand.

"Yes, Miss Lovegood,� Snape responded airily.

“Professor, may I ask you a personal question?�

Snape’s beady eyes widened. “What on Earth-�

“Sir, are you in fact a vampire?� Luna asked curiously. Her hand was still hanging in the air. Everyone was trying to stifle their laughter. Even Hermione was biting her fist.

Snape slammed his thick potion book on his desk, causing a large cloud of dust to rise.

“Miss Lovegood,� he hissed, “You can-�

“Are you or are you not,� Luna continued in a melodic voice, “a member of the undead?�

This time, Snape paced quickly up to Luna’s desk and grabbed her arm.

“Thirty points from Ravenclaw for appalling behaviour,� he said with a low growl. Connie and Nikita groaned.

“Admission is the first step to acceptance,� Luna said helpfully.

“DETENTION!�

Snape pointed forcefully to the door, his teeth clenched. Whether she was to go see Dumbledore or just get out of his sight, no one knew. But Luna arose from her seat and walked lightly out of the room without hesitation.

If Snape wasn’t so frightening, they all might have burst into applause. Instead, they had to settle for laughing into their sleeves.

"You find this comical, do you?" Snape said icily. A Gryffindor girl called J.J. was hanging her blonde hair in her face to hide her laughing, but it wasn't working. She bit her lip and looked up at the greasy, pale-faced professor before her.

"Ah...no, sir."

When class finally ended, they all practically ran out into the hallway. Ron and Harry were laughing so hard they had to lean against the stone wall. Padma ran up to them with Parvati and Lavender.

“If I see Luna in the common room later,� Padma said breathlessly, “I’ll tell you what she says.�

“I doubt you’ll see her, “ Parvati replied. “She’s got detention, remember?�

Ron threw an arm around Neville, who looked like he was trying to sink into the wall.

“First we’ve got to go Slytherin-hunting, haven’t we, Neville?�

Before Neville could say anything, Lavender started pushing them out towards the staircase.

“We have a break before the next class,� she said hurriedly. “Draco’s probably sitting out in the courtyard with his ugly mates! Let’s go, let’s go, let’s go!�

As they stepped out into the early morning sun, they found that Draco and his group of friends were indeed in the courtyard. Draco and Goyle were sitting on an intricate stone bench, while Crabbe, Blaise and at least twelve other Slytherins were gathered around him. He had apparently just said something quite hilarious as Neville and the rest slowly approached the courtyard. But before they could say anything, Draco caught sight of them.

“Look here, fellows!� Draco said sarcastically. “It’s Potty, Weasel, and Dungbottom!� The Slytherins cackled aloud.

“Ugh, what is that?� Draco exclaimed, pinching his pointy nose. Suddenly he pointed at Hermione.

“Thought I smelled a mudblood!� This made the Slytherins cackle even harder.

Suddenly, Neville stepped forward, his arms awkwardly at his sides.

“Shut it, you.. you scumbag arse-face!�

Draco’s face immediately went pale as his friends stopped laughing. Harry reached into his pocket instinctively and grabbed his wand. Ginny glanced behind quickly to see that Parvati and Lavender were not backing them up, but were in fact standing by a tree a good distance away, gaping.

Draco arose from the bench. “What did you call me?�

Neville’s face went white, but he stood his ground.

“I said…. Y-you’re a scumbag arse-face!�

“And a twitchy, flea-bitten ferret!� Ron called out.

“And an elitist prick!� Hermione said firmly.

Draco turned to face her, storming forward.

“Don’t you dare address me, you pathetic mudblood!�

Suddenly, Ginny hauled back and punched Draco across the face.

“Thank Merlin!� Ron roared. “If you hadn’t done it, I know Hermione would’ve!�

Draco got back up to his feet as his fellow Slytherins stared on in shock.

“You’ll pay for this… all of you.�

Then, Neville began to speak in a loud but quavering voice.

“I might be t-terrible at potions, a-and hopeless at transfiguration, b-but I’ve g-gotten quite g-good at Herbology and the uses of plantlife. So if you give any of us any more t-trouble, I can think of a d-dozen ways to give you unbearable hives in... in the most inconvenient places.�

Then, before Draco could respond, Neville marched quickly off. Stunned, his friends followed behind him.

“Miss Weasley,� came a stern voice. Ginny turned to see Professor McGonagall standing behind her. “I saw that, and I’m afraid I must take away ten house points from Gryffindor.�

Ginny sighed, giving the professor a weary “he-asked-for-it� look.

“You’ll serve detention with Professor Snape tonight, as I will be busy with other… orders,� she said pointedly. Then she turned and faced Draco.

“You, Mister Malfoy, also lose ten house points from Slytherin for cruel and uncouth language. Detention for you, as well.� With that, the Professor turned and left.

Ron gave Neville a proud pat on the back. “I knew you could do it! I certainly couldn’t have!�

But Ron mostly beamed at the idea that his two favorite girls had at some time punched Draco in the face, and he couldn’t smile any bigger than he was right then.

“Where’d you learn to punch like that?� Harry asked her.

Ginny started to blush. “Certainly not from him,� she said, gesturing to Ron. Hermione put her arm around Ginny’s shoulder with a grin.

“At least you’ve got detention with Luna tonight. It might actually be interesting. And Draco won’t start any trouble, now that you’ve stood up to him!�

Even Lavender and Parvati came running up to shake Neville’s hand and congratulate him.

"Well done," exclaimed a passing Hufflepuff girl with layered brown hair and hazel eyes. Neville blushed.

“Can we go on to class now?� Neville said shakily. “If I think about it any longer, I might faint!�

As they walked to class, smiles all around, Harry gave Neville a light punch on the shoulder.

“Could you really give Malfoy hives?� Harry asked with a smirk.

“And in very inconvenient places?� Ginny added.

Neville gave a crooked but proud smile. Silently, ask they walked across the grounds, they all pondered having another round of Truth or Dare that very night. Except for Ginny, of course, who was plotting her survival of that night’s detention with Malfoy and Luna.

That night, the whole school would be talking.

The gang walked tall and proud that evening as they entered the Great Hall. Dozens of students looked up from their dinner plates to wave and cheer at Neville and Ginny. As always in Hogwarts, news had traveled fast. This was mostly due to the unabashed gossiping of Lavender and Parvati.

As the gang sat down, Harry smiled to himself as he looked over at the Ravenclaw table. Luna was no longer sitting alone, but was surrounded by her housemates. Everyone had heard about the incident with the potions professor and was clamoring over her for it.

“Hi, I’m Katrina,� said one young Ravenclaw as she slid next to Luna. The girl had similar long blonde hair and a shy smile. “I think it’s brilliant the way you stood up to Snape,� she whispered.

“More than brilliant,� called a handsome 6th year. “Bloody courageous!� He raised his drink so forcefully that he doused the girl next to him in cold pumpkin juice.

Luna looked around at her raucous housemates wide-eyed, slowly chewing a bit of ham.

“He’ll come after you, now!� Dani Chow warned as she leaned over her plate, her dark brown eyes darting toward the professors table. “Now that you’ve let his secret out!� She raised her fork inquisitively, addressing her housemates.

“Do you suppose he can turn into a bat?�

“Unlikely,� Luna sighed. “That’s only myth.� She started to draw what looked like the shape of a tea-kettle in her mashed potatoes. “I have detention with him this evening, you know. But he certainly won’t try to drink my blood tonight, not while other students will be there. That would be ludicrous, not to mention rude.�

Dani peered inquisitively at Luna’s kettle-shaped lump of mashed potatoes, and then up at the wandering eyes of the ash-blonde Luna.

“I’ll bet you can’t drink all your pumpkin juice in less than ten seconds,� Dani said with a smirk.

Meanwhile, at the Gryffindor table, the gang was also getting plagued with questions about the day’s events. Their housemates were slapping Neville heartily on the back and toasting Ginny with frosty glasses of butterbeer.

One particularly quiet auburn-haired girl named Sarah sat down next to Ginny. She was immediately recognizable as one of the many muggle-born students Malfoy bullied.

“You’re amazing!� Sarah squealed. “Will you sign my Runes essay?�

Ginny blushed as she searched her bag for a quill.

Her blush was topped, however, by the absolutely crimson face of Neville Longbottom. Harry and Ron looked up to see who he was staring at. Striding down the length of the Gryffindor table was a 7th year named Rayne. She had long, wavy hair, light green eyes, and curves that drew the envy of most the other girls in her year.

“Nathan, right?� she purred.

“Yes? Er, no… it’s N-Neville�

“I heard about the way you stood up to Malfoy. Very daring, Norville. Ta!�

The three boys turned in unison to watch her walk away. As soon as she was out of ear-shot, Ron began shaking Neville violently.

“Bloody wicked!� He raved, his eyes wide with disbelief. “All you did was call him a scumbag arse-face and the fittest girl in school wants to talk to you! Hell, I’ll call him a flaming chicken-bugger right now!� He stood up dramatically, only to be yanked back down by Harry.

“Do watch your mouth,� Hermione reprimanded. “And don’t forget, Luna and Ginny have detention with he and Snape this evening. Don’t make things worse.� With that, Hermione stood up and stormed out of the Great Hall. Ron and Harry looked at each-other, dumbfounded.

Eventually dinner began to wind down, and Ginny walked over to the Ravenclaws to meet Luna. She’d promised to walk her to detention that evening. When she got to the Ravenclaw table, Luna had a pumpkin-juice mustache and a toothy grin.

“We’ll wait for you,� Harry called to the two girls, waving a hand in the air.

“What are you on about?� Ron said irritably.

“Truth or Dare, we’re playing again tonight. Remember?�

Ron grimaced and kept walking. “If I have to remove, wear, or even talk about underpants tonight, I’m going mad!�

“Agreed.�

As all the other students were rushing up the moving staircase towards their dormitories, Ginny and Luna headed solemnly for Snape’s office. Well, Ginny was solemn. Luna was humming while chewing on a swizzle-stick. Ginny looked at her oddly.

“Melon-flavored,� Luna said, offering the candy forward. “Care for some?� Ginny shook her head.

"Hey Luna!" called a young Ravenclaw girl with unruly blonde hair, running toward them. Her nails were painted all different colors as if she couldn't decide. Some were glittering pink, some were deep blue, some were a metallic lilac.

"Luna," she panted, "Are you coming straight back to the common-room after detention?"

"Not immediately, Gena, no," Luna said dreamily. "I've been invited to the Gryffindor tower again." Ginny began dragging Luna away, as they were going to be late for detention.

“Incredible,� Ginny groaned as they shuffled through the halls. “One day they’re hiding your socks in the rafters, the next day they’re your best bloody mates!�

At last, they were outside Snape’s door. As Ginny pushed it open, they could see that Draco was already inside.

“So glad you could finally join us,� Snape said icily. Draco turned around in his chair to smirk at the two girls. He had a lumpy purple bruise just under his left eye, which made Ginny laugh to herself.

“Tonight,� Snape continued witheringly, “you will be scrubbing trophies. Without magic.� Draco groaned aloud, but Snape ignored him. His black, beady eyes were fixated on Luna and her chewing.

“What… is… that?�

“A melon-flavored swizzle-stick. Would you like some?� Luna pulled the light-green candy out of her mouth and held the chewed-up candy stick in mid-air. Snape snatched it out of her hand immediately.

“What do you want it for?� Luna said curiously. “It’s not got blood in it.�

Snape angrily threw the candy-stick into the bin next to his desk and fumed silently. Ginny feared he might sprout fangs at any moment.

“Follow me,� he growled. With a sharp turn on his heel, he stormed out of the office with his long black cloak fluttering behind him. Luna looked back longingly at the bin where her delicious candy had been disposed, and hesitantly followed behind. Neither she nor Ginny or even Draco spoke. As they reached the door of one of the many trophy rooms, Snape silently held his hand out. Ginny and Draco instinctively put their wands in his hand. Snape looked expectantly at Luna, who stood with furrowed brow.

“I already gave you my swizzle-stick, and you binned it!�

“Wand,� Snape demanded.

“Well�, Luna sighed, “If I must. But you won’t toss this one, will you?� Ginny bit her lip to stifle a laugh. Snape snatched the wand out of Luna’s hand, turned on his heel, and stormed away.

“I’ll be back in two hours time,� he hissed over his shoulder. The door swung shut behind him.

The three of them turned to find three small buckets of soapy water and soft rags. Draco immediately walked over to a chair in the corner and propped his feet up on one of the shelves.

“Sod this,� he said angrily. “This is peasant-work. I’ll leave it to you, Weasley.�

Ginny put her hands on her hips while Luna reached into her robe pocket and pulled out another swizzle-stick.

“You will help us scrub trophies,� Ginny declared, “or I’ll dump this bucket over your head.�

“I’ll hex you into next year!� Draco screeched. His grey eyes were glinting in the dim light.

“With what? You haven’t got your wand, idiot.� Ginny laughed as Draco’s face went blank.

“And we both know that I could take you in a fight, Malfoy. So start scrubbing.�

The time crept by slowly, and the array of dusty old trophies seemed never-ending. Draco was clearly putting no effort into the task as he dawdled back and forth, occasionally dragging his wet cloth over a trophy or two. Mostly, he yawned and dangled the cloth by the very tips of his fingers.

“That’s it�, said Ginny, storming straight at Draco to look him directly in the face. “Start scrubbing, you spoilt prat! This instant!� Her eyes were narrowed and her pitch was rising, not unlike her mother when she was irritated.

“What’ll you do if I don’t?� Draco asked teasingly. “It’s bad enough having to endure your ugly, freckled face!�

In his office down the hall, Professor Snape heard a high-pitched scream. He dashed quickly to the Trophy Room, throwing the door open with one hand. Splayed on the floor was Draco, pulling a sudsy bucket off of his head. As he rubbed his reddened eyes, Ginny folded her arms coolly.

“He had an accident,� she said with perfect nonchalance. “Didn’t you, Malfoy?�

Draco nodded between sobs, too terrified to say otherwise. Meanwhile, Luna was slyly stuffing her last swizzlestick down her left sock before Snape could confiscate it.

As Ginny led Luna into the Gryffindor common room, they were bombarded with questions. Luna stood by the door, frowning, while Ginny grabbed a pillow and went to sit by the fireplace.

“How bad was it?� Ron asked with a tremble. “Snape… he’s completely horrifying.� Neville nodded, hugging a throw-pillow in his arms.

“It wasn’t as bad as all that,� Ginny sighed. “I mean, besides the scrubbing. If you have to have detention with someone, definitely bring Luna. I’ve never seen Snape so utterly speechless!�

Everyone turned to look at Luna, who was still frowning.

“Ginny doused Draco’s head, and he cried like a woman,� Luna recounted in a dreamy voice. “And he took two of my swizzle-sticks, and stared at me with those beady little eyes.�

“Terrible, terrible vampire-man…�

Everyone burst out laughing as Hermione and Ginny beckoned Luna over to the fireplace. She hesitantly sat down between the two girls, and Hermione pointed to her wrist to show that she was still wearing the rubber-band bracelet Luna had given her.

“Why’s ‘Mione not talking to me?� Ron whispered to Harry out the side of his mouth. They were seated on the couch again, with Neville still clutching a pillow.

“Don’t ask me,� Harry replied in a low voice. “I’ll never figure girls out.�

“Alright!� Ginny said, getting everyone’s attention. “I’ve been scrubbing trophies and listening to Malfoy whine for two hours! Let’s play some Truth or Dare, for Merlin’s sake!�

“I’ll go!� Ron said suddenly, a look of determination on his freckled face. “I pick Hermione. Truth or dare?�

Harry stared at his friend in disbelief. Hermione, however, was biting her lip pensively. Ginny cleared her throat a couple times, but Hermione paid no notice.

“Oh, um… truth,� she said, flustered. Last time she’d picked dare, she had to kiss Ron. This time she was hoping for something slightly less embarrassing.

“Alright, you have to be completely honest then!� Ron warned.

“I know!�

“It’s an unspoken law, no lying if you pick Truth!� he said, getting notably louder.

“I understand Ron, just asking me something!�

“Why are you mad at me?�

Hermione went pale as all eyes turned on her.
The Gryffindor common room was silent except for the crackling fire, as all eyes went to Hermione. (All eyes but Luna’s, as she was dreamily picking at her blue and lilac striped stockings.)

“What?� Hermione said, her face completely flustered.

“I asked why you’re mad at me,� Ron said defiantly, “and you picked truth, so there’s no getting out of it!�

Ginny turned away, snickering into her shoulder.

“Alright,� Hermione said stiffly, folding her arms across her chest. “If you must know, I’m mad because… because you’re an insensitive brute!�

Harry and Ron looked at each other in amazement.

“What the bloody Hell does that mean?� Ron bellowed.

“Y-you think you can j-just objectify people, um, women,� she stammered, “which is degrading and insulting to… to your peers, your female peers…�

Ron continued to look thoroughly gobsmacked.

“You said that Rayne was the ‘hottest’ girl in school,� Hermione continued, becoming increasingly furious. “You said that right in front of Ginny and I… what are we, chopped flobberworm? What about, er, Parvati? She’s pretty! Or Lavender, we certainly know what you think of her! What about Luna, she’s lovely, isn’t she?� (Luna’s swizzle-stick dropped from her mouth as she looked up at the mention of her name.)

“Or what about me?� Hermione raged on, standing up in front of the fireplace, pointing a finger at Ron’s chest. “Clearly it hasn’t yet occurred to you that I’m a girl! And… and I have feelings, too, you know! To talk about other girls that crudely, right in front of… Ugh!�

Hermione immediately stormed out of the common room and up the stairs to the girl’s dormitory, nearly knocking into Ashley, one of the Gryffindor prefects.

“Hey Ashley,� Parvati called out awkwardly. “Care to play some Truth or Dare?�

Her freckled face went pink. “I think I’m a bit too old for this game,� she said in an odd voice. She eyed them suspiciously all the way down the stairs and out the portrait.

For a moment they sat in silence, Ron’s mouth hanging in shock. Even Lavender and Parvati stared at the ground in disbelief at Hermione’s sudden fit or rage.

“Er, I’m going to check on Hermione,� Ginny said quietly.

“Bring her a tampon while you’re up there, will you?� Ron said bitterly. Ginny smacked him fiercely on the back of the head.

“Neville, why don’t you have a turn?�

As Ginny headed up the stairs, Neville started to feel little beads of sweat drip down his face. As he yanked on the collar of his shirt, he tried to think of whom he could pick without setting off any latent emotions.

“Luna?� He ventured shyly. “Truth or d-dare?�

Luna twirled a dark blue swizzle-stick in her hand as she contemplated the question.

“Dare, then.�

Neville looked quite confounded until Harry leaned over and whispered something in his ear. Neville’s face brightened.

“Luna, I dare you to wear the words “Snape is a Vampire� on your robes tomorrow!�

Luna nodded with consideration. “It’ll go well with the countermeasures I’ve prepared.�
Lavender and Parvati burst into giggles.

“Parvati,� Luna said dreamily. “Truth or Dare?�

Parvati straightened up, tossing her thick braided hair behind her back. “Truth!�

Luna pondered a moment, before Lavender got up and whispered into Luna’s ear.

“Who do you have a crush on?� Luna repeated in a sing-song voice.

Parvati went red in the face. “Ikram… from Hufflepuff.� She looked venomously over at Lavender, who was smirking.

“Who’s that?� Harry asked.

“Hell if I know,� Ron answered. “I’ll never understand girls.�

The next morning, it was an awkwardly silent breakfast in the Great Hall. Hermione refused to look at Ron, and he in turn refused to look at her. Lavender and Parvati slid in next to Ginny and Neville suddenly and lowered their voices.

“Look at the Ravenclaw table,� Lavender hissed, trying to contain her laughter. “Luna’s absolutely bat-shit bonkers!�

They all turned to see Luna sitting with her back to her housemates, wearing a long string of garlic cloves around her neck. The girl sitting behind her raised her wand and pointed it at Luna’s back.

“Califuego!� said Elizabeth, making motions with her wand as though she was drawing on Luna’s back. When she was done, she waved the other Ravenclaws to come look. She’d written “Snape is a Vampire� in fiery letters on the back of Luna’s robes. Louise began giggling silently to herself so hard that she appeared to be choking. Luna patted her on the back obliviously.

“Are you seriously going to wear it all day?� Elizabeth said with a wide smile.

"The garlic, or the words?� Luna inquired.

“All of it!�

“Of course,� Luna replied dreamily. “I’m told that a dare is an unspoken law of some sort. And the garlic is for protection, of course.�

“You’ll have to tell me all about it when you see me in Astronomy, if you’re still alive by then!�

Harry and Neville burst into laughter. The garlic was much more than they expected.

“I love this game!� Harry said with a chuckle. Ron kicked him under the table.

“Oh, Parvati,� Lavender sang with a smirk. “Wave hello to Ikram dearest!�

Parvati looked up to see a handsome, dark-skinned Hufflepuff boy standing up awkwardly at his table. He caught sight of Lavender and gave her an awkward wave. Before she could respond, however, a thin hand with pink nail polish reached up and yanked Ikram back down by the collar.

Parvati was about to start scolding her best friend for telling, but they were interrupted by raucous laughter. Students all around the Great Hall had noticed Luna’s robes and were abandoning their breakfasts to have a look.

Suddenly, a brunette Ravenclaw named Joy stood up in her seat and began chanting and pumping her fist.

“Loony Lovegood! Loony Lovegood! Loony Lovegood!�

Almost immediately, the entire giant room was filled with chanting. Luna simply waved her fork in the air to the rhythm as she chewed on a biscuit. Everyone at the Gryffindor table was clapping and chanting along. Even Lavender! The only people not enjoying it were Ron, Hermione, and the Slytherins.

Snape couldn’t see from the head table exactly what everyone was laughing about, but he had a pretty good idea. Professor Dumbledore arose from his seat and waved his hand, causing the chanting to hush.

Ron and Hermione exchanged an awkward glance, and Hermione abruptly excused herself from the table. Ginny noticed this, and trying to prevent another embarrassing scene between the two, stood up to follow her. She gave Harry a meaningful look, and he stood up too, grabbing Neville with him.

They all followed Hermione out of the Great Hall, clapping to the tune of the “Loony Lovegood� chant. Almost immediately, the rest of the Gryffindor table got up as well, clapping along. Moments later, the Ravenclaws slowly began to head out to their classes, clapping as well. Hermione blushed furiously as the thunderous clapping followed behind her.

For the first time in her life, she looked forward to Potions class. Luna and her garlic necklace were sure to give Snape a well-deserved heart attack.

First class that day was Transfiguration, a class which Hermione normally quite enjoyed, but she was still very angry at Ron from the previous night’s round of “Truth or Dare�. Instead of taking her normal seat at the desk next to Ron and Harry, she took an empty seat next to another Gryffindor named Jacqui.

“Oh, um… hello, Hermione,� Jacqui stammered. “Morning!�

Hermione huffed and dropped her book-bag onto the desk. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Harry and Ron arguing quietly. Harry noticed her looking and elbowed Ron, but Hermione faced forward again before she could catch his eye.

“Having another row with Ron,� Jacqui asked sympathetically.

“What?!�

“Well, you always fight,� she explained. “You’re worse than my parents!�

Hermione blushed crimson and pretended to be reading the text. Suddenly, a balled-up piece of parchment landed on top of her open book. She looked over her shoulder at Ron, who was looking back at her glumly. She unwrapped the parchment and saw that he’d written her a note:

Hermione:
I’m stupid and nasty and insensitive and mean and horrible, please don’t be mad at me anymore.

Hermione layed the parchment out, smoothing it with her hands, and began writing.

I think you’re forgetting something.

She folded the parchment neatly and tossed it back at Ron with a very highly raised eyebrow. A moment later, the parchment came sailing back.

Okay… I’m cruel and heartless and a bully and a brute and my ears are too big. What bloody else?

Hermione almost laughed as she read his note, but then sternly reminded herself that she was still mad at him. She feigned carelessness and tossed the note right back to him, without a reply. A minute later, she looked back out of the corner of her eye. Ron and Harry were deliberating quietly amongst themselves. A moment later, the note came sailing back, this time landing on Jacqui’s book. Jacqui handed Hermione the note with a smirk. In it, Ron had written one last message in his thick, scribbled handwriting:

You’re very pretty.

Hermione smiled to herself. Everything was forgiven. What a beautiful day it was!

After class, Hermione joined Ron and Harry as they walked down to Potions. Neville caught up to them, panting.

“Are you all actually going to class?� Neville whined.

“I wouldn’t miss it,� Harry said with a grin. “Snape is going to flip his wig!�

“That’s exactly why I want to miss it,� Neville explained. His voice quivered. “Imagine the mood he’ll be in when he sees what Luna’s wearing!�

Ron laughed, grabbing Neville by the shoulder. “It’ll be worth it!�

“Come on,� Neville gasped. “One of you punch me in the face so I can go to the hospital wing!�

Ron and Harry simply shook their heads as Hermione put a protective arm around Neville. If it wasn’t for her, he’d be utterly hopeless in Potions.

When they entered the classroom, Luna was already inside. She was sitting alone, however, because her necklace of garlic cloves was quite pungent. Although she was sitting alone at her desk, the other Ravenclaws were rallied around her.

“This could be the last day of your life,� said a girl named Emily with light brown hair. “You’ll go out a hero!� She stuck her hand out for a high-five, but Luna just stared blankly at Emily’s palm.

“Shhh,� said Shivon, another Ravenclaw girl with short blonde hair and a smattering of freckles. “Snape’s coming!�

Every student in the room was biting their lip as Snape entered the classroom. But instead of sweeping dramatically to the front of the class, he stopped in his tracks halfway. He had caught site of the back of Luna’s robes. There, in fiery letters, read the words:

Snape is a Vampire

Snape was utterly silent for almost a full minute until,

“Out of your seat, Miss Lovegood!

Snapes sudden outburst caused everyone to jump in their seats. Luna, however, serenely arose from her seat and stood to face the professor. His black, beady eyes fell to Luna’s garlic necklace.

“What on Earth are you wearing?� Snape hissed. Luna pulled on her string lightly to show him.

“Garlic, Professor,� she said plainly. “It wards off vampires. Not affected, are you?�

Snape angrily snatched the garlic necklace off her neck and threw it on the ground. He was fuming.

“Crikey,� Luna mumbled to herself. “You undead really hate garlic, then?�

Snape had had it by then. He screamed angrily that she was to serve two weeks detention, suffer fifty points from Ravenclaw, and immediately visit Professor Dumbledore. No one had heard him scream so loud in all their years at Hogwarts. When he finished, Luna hummed lightly as she walked out of the classroom, leaving her string of garlic on the floor. The moment Snape turned his back, Shivon reached down and snatched it up into her book-bag. She certainly wasn’t going to take any chances with the blood-sucking Potions professor.

By lunchtime, Luna was a Hogwarts legend. The Great Hall was buzzing with wildly overactive stories about what had happened in class.

Lavender slid into the seat next to Hermione, completely ignoring her heaping plate of food.

“Did you hear?� Lavender squealed. “Some people are saying that Snape tried to bite Luna, and she shoved garlic in his mouth!�

Ron swallowed a forkful of peas and carrots. “I’d heard Snape had been sacked, but I knew it was too good to be true.�

Hermione looked over to the Ravenclaw table, trying to catch a glimpse of Luna. The fiery lettering was gone from her robes, but they still reeked a bit like smoke and garlic. Her housemates were clapping her on the back fervently.

“I guess they’ve forgiven her for losing all those house points,� Ginny said hopefully.

“When’s the last time Ravenclaw won, anyway?� Harry asked. “Doesn’t even matter, look how happy they are.�

“For now,� Ron said in a low voice. “If she was in our house and lost all those points, I’d be seething!�

Hermione leaned forward, speaking quite seriously. “Snape is going to have Luna serve each of her detentions with him! He’s going to make her absolutely miserable!�

Ron shook his head. “I don’t think anything can make that girl miserable.�

Suddenly, Hermione smiled to herself. She looked around the table before announcing, “Truth or Dare?�

Harry and Ron put their heads down, and Ginny leaned back in her seat.

“Dare!� Parvati volunteered, arching her thick eyebrows.

Hermione reached into her book-bag and pulled out a small compact mirror. She held it out to Parvati.

“I dare you to give this to Luna, to take with her to detention with Snape.�

Parvati grinned wickedly. “You’re on.�

That night, Professor Snape walked silently yet quickly through Hogwarts, leading a very thoughtful young Ravenclaw behind him. Luna reached into her robes pocket and wrapped her hand around the compact mirror Parvati had given her at dinner. It was very thoughtful, indeed. This would prove that Snape was a vampire once and for all.

Snape led her all the way down to the main entrance and out the door, and continued walking silently through Hogwarts’ moonlit grounds. Finally, they entered the Herbology greenhouses. Snape pointed his long, cloaked arm toward the first greenhouse, which held a large and slightly overgrown garden. It was lit only by a few sparse torches along the walls.

“Tonight, Miss Lovegood,� Snape said witheringly, “you will be weeding Professor Sprout’s garden. We’ll see how funny you think you are after two hours of pulling up weeds with your bare hands.�

Snape immediately held out his open palm.

“Wand.�

Luna reached into her pocket obligingly, but instead of placing her wand in his hand, she gave him the open compact. Looking down into it, she saw Snape’s angry reflection looking back at her. His large beady eyes were dilating with fury, the nostrils of his giant greasy hook nose were flairing.

“Oh, look at that!� Luna said with a hint of disappointment. “You've got a reflection after all!�

Snape slammed the compact shut in his pale, shaking hand.

“I’ll say this only once,� he growled. “I… am not… a Vampire!�

Luna frowned as she pulled her wand out of her other pocket. “That’s settled then, but there are still so many things about yourself that require explanation!�

Snape snatched her wand away and stormed furiously into the night. Luna shrugged and headed into the dark, glassy confines of Professor Sprout’s greenhouse.

It was nearly 10:30 that night when Luna entered the Gryffindor common room. (Hermione had trusted her with the password.) Everyone looked up to see a very disheveled blonde standing warily by the portrait entrance. Luna’s long blonde hair was tangled and mussed while her robes were caked with dirt. A tiny light blue flower stuck out from a strand of her hair, just above her left ear. Tiny fern leaves hung from her pale blonde locks.

“Crikey, what did he do?� Ron shouted. “Throw you in the compost heap or something? Try to bury you alive?�

Luna replied with a sneeze, causing a puff of dirt to fall off her face.

“He’s not a vampire,� she said sullenly, tossing the compact back to Hermione.

Hermione smiled sympathetically. “That’s alright, Luna. He doesn’t necessarily need to be undead to be the nightmare that he is.�

Ginny reached her hand up and shook her box of Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Beans, making a loud rattling sound.

“Truth or dare! Truth or dare!� she announced in a sing-song voice.

“Dare!� Hermione said excitedly. Ever since Ron had apologized that morning, she was feeling much better about everything. Nothing could bring her down now!

“Alright,� Ginny said thoughtfully as she twirled a strand of red hair in her fingers. “I dare you to serenade a random boy that I pick out in the halls tomorrow morning.

Hermione blushed crimson. She wasn’t sure she had a very nice singing voice. Harry and Ron cracked up laughing at the idea of Hermione singing a love song to a fellow student. Hermione fumed, pointing a finger at Ron.

“Truth or Dare?�

Ron crossed his arms defiantly against his chest. “Dare!�

Hermione smiled, standing up to her feet. “I dare you, Ronald Weasley, to serenade me at breakfast tomorrow morning!�

Ron’s face went so pale he nearly lost his freckles. Harry was laughing so hard he couldn’t even hide it. He threw his head back, guffawing. Even Neville was cracking up.

Ginny groaned. “I’ve heard him sing, you know,� Ginny explained. “You may have just done yourself a great disservice, Hermione.�

Hermione laughed at her clever revenge, but Ron was glaring at his best friend. Harry was doubled over with laughter.

“Alright, Harry, Truth or Dare?� Ron said smugly.

“Truth!� he exclaimed hurriedly, fixing his glasses on his face. He certainly didn’t want to sing to anyone.

“If you had to kiss any girl in this room, who would it be?�

Harry’s jaw dropped as his glasses began to fog up. Two Gryffindor girls in the corner playing wizard’s chess perked up their ears. Amanda and Kyra, two very pretty brunettes, seemed quite interested in their game all of a sudden.

Harry stammered a little, running his hand through his unruly hair. He looked down at his hands.

“Well, Ginny,� he stammered. It was obvious what his answer would be, but Ron quite enjoyed the torture of making him say it.

“I’m going to bed!� Ginny announced in an awkwardly loud voice. She practically ran all the way up the stairs to the girl’s dormitory. Harry also got up from the couch and headed for the boy’s dormitory. Ron and Neville were on his heels, talking frantically. Pretty soon, everyone got up and, laughing amongst themselves, headed to their dorms. Eventually, Luna was left standing by the portrait entrance, still covered in dirt and plantlife.

“Suppose I’ll head back to my own common room, then,� she said to nobody in particular.

The next morning, Parvati and Ginny walked arm-in-arm with Hermione through the halls. It was time to get down to the Great Hall for breakfast, but Hermione had a dare to fulfill first. Ginny’s eyes darted from face to face, looking for the perfect victim. Finally she spotted a handsome Hufflepuff boy who had dropped his Runes textbook and had stopped to pick it up.

“Go, go, go!� Ginny hissed, pushing Hermione forward. The Hufflepuff boy straightened up, book in hand, to see a wavy-haired, wide-eyed Hermione staring at him. He jumped, dropping his book again. But before he could pick it up, Hermione cleared her throat and began to sing in a wobbly voice.

“I'll tell my mum when I go home
The boys won't leave the girls alone
They pulled my hair and stole my comb
But that's alright 'til I go home..�

The Hufflepuff boy’s face went red as other students stopped to watch the sight. Hermione knelt down quickly to pick up the boy’s textbook, and shoved it back into his arms before continuing in a trembling, high-pitched tune.

“She is handsome, she is pretty
She is the belle of Belfast City
She is courting 1, 2, 3,
Please won't you tell me who is she?

Before the boy could react, Hermione turned on her heel and ran down the hall, leaving several students applauding and shouting for an encore. As Ginny and Parvati hurried after her, the Hufflepuff boy was left hugging his Runes book like a teddy bear.

“She likes me,� he said dreamily.

Hermione speed-walked all the way to breakfast, Ginny and Parvati at her heels.

“You know,� Parvati said sweetly, “if you weren’t so nervous, you might actually have a proper singing voice!�

Hermione waved her hand with a flutter. “It doesn’t matter anymore,� she huffed. In a few moments, someone else will be doing the singing.� By the time they reached the Great Hall, Hermione pushed the doors open with a new air of confidence. What she saw as she entered, however, stopped her right in her tracks.

Ron was sitting on the floor in front of the Gryffindor table, with Harry and Neville at his sides. As soon as Hermione, Ginny and Parvati walked into the Great Hall, everyone in Gryffindor house turned to face them. Before Hermione could utter a word, Ron got down on one knee and started to sing loudly, and a bit off-key.

“You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips
And there's no tenderness like before in your fingertips
You're trying hard not to show it
But, Hermione Granger, I know it…

Suddenly, Neville and Harry started in with him:

“You've lost that loving feeling,
Woah, that loving feeling
You've lost that loving feeling
Now it's gone, gone, gone!

Harry started to crack up as they went into the “Whoa- whoa-whoa� part. Everyone in the Great Hall was clapping and whistling furiously over their forgotten breakfasts. Hermione’s face was bright red, but Ginny and Parvati pushed her towards the table. Soon, almost all of the Great Hall was singing it at once.

“You've lost that loving feeling,
Whoa, that loving feeling
You've lost that loving feeling
Now it's gone, gone, gone!
Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Hermione burst into laughter and ran straight into Ron, hugging him fiercely. Dumbledore only looked on with a smirk, allowing the singing to die down on it’s own. Snape folded his arms across his chest and turned away, as though the entire thing was beneath him. Finally the girls all took their seats, as did Harry, Neville, and Ron. Neville was still blushing.

“Very brave of you,� Hermione said to him consolingly. “It was good of you to join Ron in his dare. You, as well, Harry.� She couldn’t stop smiling.

“You can say whatever you want about me,� Ron announced, “you can even say I sing like a rattled Hippogriff, but I’ll never back down from a dare.�

“I love this game,� Ginny said, leaning forward. “In fact… I think we should expand…�

Everyone had agreed with Ginny’s idea to expand their game of Truth or Dare, even Parvati and Lavender were committed to the group. They decided to meet up in the courtyard later that day during a break between classes. Even Neville was excited… a common-room game of Truth or Dare is one thing, but taking it out on the rest of the school could be absolutely epic. In fact, Neville was still buzzing from nervousness of singing in front of the whole school with Harry and Ron that morning at breakfast.

Eventually, that afternoon, everyone met up in a small, sunlit area surrounded by stone benches. Harry, Ron and Hermione sat on one, while Neville took a seat next to Ginny and Luna on the opposite one. Moments later, Lavender and Parvati came running up, giggling.

Ron, annoyed by the giggling girls, turned to his sister.

“How are we supposed to expand the game? It’s not like we can just go up and ask random people to play with us!� Ron got a look of stupor on his face. “We’re not going to do that, are we?!�

“No,� Ginny laughed, shaking her head. “We need new participants. We can’t just keep daring on eachother, can we?�

At that moment, the thin Hufflepuff boy that Hermione had sung to that morning came walking by with a few of his housemates. He waved shyly to Hermione, who whimpered and waved back obligingly. Cody was so enamored with the delicate wave of her hand that he tripped over a tree root and hit the ground hard with his face. As his buddies lifted him up and walked him away, Harry got a giant, goofy grin.

“What did you do to him, Hermione?�

“You missed it!� Ginny squealed. “Hermione had to serenade someone this morning as well, remember? Well, that’s the lucky guy!�

Ron was fuming, but Harry continued to chuckle. “You actually sang to him?�

Hermione straightened up, blushing lightly. “It was just a verse or two, really… nothing extravagant like you boys did this morning!�

“Oh, you loved it!� Lavender hissed to Hermione with a wicked grin. Suddenly, Ron was blushing lightly as well. Only Ron could fume and pout and blush at the same time.

Suddenly Ginny cleared her throat. “This is exactly what I was going for! The more people the merrier! Unless you all want to continue stripping or singing publicly!�

Harry, Ron and Hermione all shook their heads simultaneously.

“Alright then, who’s first?� Ginny asked with an air of leadership.

“You!� Parvati exclaimed, pointing at Ginny. “You haven’t had any really good truths or dares yet!� The rest of the group nodded in agreement.

“Fine!� Ginny said proudly. “Someone dare me. Anybody!�

“I’ve got one,� Lavender offered. “You know that nosy Ravenclaw, Amy? The one with curly blonde hair?�

Hermione scrunched up her nose. “She’s like a miniature Rita Skeeter!�

“I dare you, Ginny,� Lavender continued, “to kiss her!�

Harry and Ron looked at Lavender like she was insane. Ginny gasped.
“You want me to kiss a girl?� She howled. “Not Amy, any girl but Amy… she’ll tell everyone! She tells everyone everything!�

“That’s the point of the dare,� Lavender responded coolly. “And you’ve got a new victim!�

All eyes were on Ginny.

“Fine!� she said, trying to sound confident. “But if I have to kiss her, and everyone’s going to find out anyway, I’m going to do this right!� Ginny started looking around the grounds at the many groups of students idly enjoying their break.

“You’re not going to do it right now are you?� Hermione gasped.

“Might as well get it over with!� Ginny said with exasperation. “Amy, Amy! Come over here a minute!� she called, waving her arm in the air.

Amy, who was standing with several fellow Ravenclaws by the Hogwarts entrance, came slinking over. She did look like a junior Rita Skeeter, but without the glasses and long, gaudy nails.

“Ah, Hello Ginny,� she said airily. She glanced over at Luna. “Hello, Luna! So good to see you!� Then she nodded at Harry. “And here’s Harry Potter,� she announced to herself. Harry became annoyed with her instantly.

“I’ve, er… got a secret to tell you!� Ginny mumbled.

“Oh, do tell!� Amy said, coming closer.

Without a single hesitation or thought, Ginny leaned forward, scrunched her eyes closed, and kissed Amy right on the lips. Amy jumped back, looking absolutely scandalized.

“Couldn’t resist!� Ginny said sheepishly. Amy immediately speed-walked back to her group of friends, where they began whispering heatedly and glancing with wide-eyes back at Ginny. Ron was guffawing.

“Think it’s funny, do you?� Ginny said with a squeal to her older brother. “Now everyone’s going to think I’m a lesbian!�

Ginny walked up to the bench, shoved Ron aside, and grabbed Harry by the shirt collar. She pulled him up to a standing position, threw her arms around his neck, and kissed him. Lavender and Parvati started whooping and hollering so loudly that people began to stare. When she finished kissing him, Ginny lightly pushed Harry back down onto the stone bench.

“There!� Ginny announced victoriously. “That’ll give them something to talk about!�

Over by the entrance, Amy looked inexplicably insulted.

“I really didn’t need to see all of that!� Ron bellowed. He leaned over and shoved his face in his hands.

“My turn to dare someone,� Ginny said loudly, ignoring her older brother. Ginny looked around the grounds at the hundreds of students. A few yards away, a Hufflepuff girl named Kacey had just dropped a roll of parchment and was scurrying to pick it up off the ground before it got too filthy.

“Kacey, come here a moment, will you?� Ginny said politely. Then, she quickly turned to Hermione and whispered fiercely in her ear. Hermione, looking utterly aghast, pulled out her wand. When Kacey finally approached, Ginny stood up excitedly and walked up to her, pulling her around in the other direction. This way, her back was to Hermione.

“Kacey, can you help me with something?� Ginny said, trying to stall. “I think there’s a bug in my hair, but I just can’t get it out.� Ginny leaned her head forward, shaking out her red hair. “Is there a spider in there? Tell me, I’m freaking out!�

As Kacey leaned forward and inspected Ginny’s red locks, Hermione stood up and silently muttered “Califuego�, causing the tip of her wand to ignite like a match. She quickly traced red words on the back of Kacey’s robes, while Ginny twirled back and forth, keeping the girl distracted. Finally, Hermione sat back down.

“I don’t see anything,� Kacey said impatiently.

“You’re probably right,� Ginny replied with a wide grin. “Thanks anyway!�

As Kacey turned to walk away, bright, fiery lettering was visible on the back of her robes. It read:

Harry Potter
is SO DREAMY!

As Harry read this, his jaw dropped.

“I wonder how long she’ll walk around with that on her before she figures out it’s there?� Ron said with a grin, elbowing his best friend.

Suddenly, Hermione stood up. “Break’s over, it’s time to get on to our next classes,� she ordered. Picking up her book-bag, she immediately started walking towards the Hogwarts entrance. Neville ran to catch up with her, along with Harry and Ron a moment later. Wherever Hermione and her carefully written class notes went, the boys were sure to follow. But the biggest thing on her mind was that it was her turn in the game of Truth or Dare, and she could only think of one person that deserved to be their next victim.

Hermione ran out of the courtyard before everyone else, throwing her book-bag over her shoulder. She was almost out of breath by the time she caught up to Kacey.

“Kacey! Wait… stop� Hermione gasped. Kacey turned around, looking perplexed.

Hermione hesitated, still feeling a little bad about Ginny’s dare that she’d just fulfilled.

“Kacey, I- I wrote something on your back.�

Kacey frowned. “You did? I didn’t notice!� She took of her robes, revealing a button-down shirt and long skirt. She stretched out her robes in front of her, revealing large, fiery lettering. It read:

Harry Potter

is SO DREAMY!

Kacey laughed to herself. “You wrote that?�

Hermione nodded. “Sorry. It was a dare, I couldn’t back down. But I’m so glad I caught you before you got to class. I can remove it, I swear!�

Kacey shook out her robes and slipped her arms back into the sleeves. “Are you mad? Potter is a handsome devil, and I don’t care who knows it!� she said thoughtfully. “I’ll wear it anyway.�

Before Hermione could get a word in edgewise, Kacey walked with her head high across the grounds toward the Herbology greenhouses. People stopped and whistled as she passed. Hermione smiled to herself as she walked towards the main entrance to Hogwarts. Maybe Potions class wouldn’t be so bad today.

Luna caught sight of her and walked up, holding her books close to her chest and grinning happily.

“Potions next!� Hermione sighed. “Are you coming?�

Luna nodded, and then inexplicably held out her closed fist.

“What’ve you got there?� Hermione asked.

Luna opened her fist, revealing a thick and muddy earthworm. Hermione jumped back.

“I’ve yet to name it,� Luna said with a hint of sadness. “I can’t tell if it’s a boy or a girl.�

Hermione crept closer to Luna’s outstretched hand, trying to regain composure.

“Well, you can give it a name that isn’t gender specific!� Hermione advised. “Like Sam, or maybe Ash?�

Luna shook her head. “It doesn’t look like a Sam or an Ash.�

“Billie?� Hermione offered.

“No, I’ve already got an Uncle Billie.�

“Frankie?�

Luna paused, carefully appraising the earthworm writhing in her hand. “Yes, you’re a Frankie. That’s what you are! Frankie Lovegood.� Luna dropped the newly-named worm in her pocket and smiled appreciatively.

Suddenly, Hermione got a brilliant idea.
“Luna,� she whispered, taking the girls arm. “I’ve got a dare for you, if you’re interested…�

Luna and Hermione talked quietly amongst themselves the entire way to Potions.

Hermione took her seat next to Neville just in time to avoid Professor Snape, for not a moment later he was sweeping into class. Dozens of students began scrambling for their cauldrons and flipping through their textbooks wildly. Hermione looked over towards Luna, who was looking down into her empty cauldron as if something might bubble up from nowhere. She turned to see Hermione looking at her, and got a look of dawning realization. Luna reached down into her robes pocket, pulling out a red swizzlestick. She looked at it confoundedly and put it back. Then she pulled out a lollipop wrapper, huffed, and put that back in her pocket as well. Finally, she withdrew a thick earthworm from her pocket, covered with little bits of dust and lint. A pretty Asian girl named Pia who was sitting beside her looked horrified.

“That’s not a potion ingredient, is it?� Pia asked incredulously.

Instead of answering her, Luna leaned forward and delicately dropped the earthworm onto Draco Malfoy’s collar. It slowly crept along towards Draco’s left ear, curling up against his neck. Draco must have felt it, because his hand flew up to his ear, and he began batting madly at the side of his head. The worm dropped obliviously down as Draco stood up, rolling down into the front of his collar.

“Get it off me! Get it off me!� Draco screamed, stamping his feet. Professor Snape whipped his head around to see his favorite student throwing a fit. Draco was squealing and smacking his own head with his hands as though his head was on fire. Harry and Ron buried their faces in their books and started guffawing with laughter, while Neville looked at Hermione quizzically.

“Control yourself, Malfoy!� Snape hissed, approaching the blonde Slytherin. His normally slicked-back hair was now wildly mussed and in his face. The worm dropped from Malfoy’s robes collar down into his chest pocket. Draco jumped back, crashing into the desk behind him. At this point, the entire class was laughing unabashedly.

“It’s in my robes!� Malfoy screeched. “Ooh, it’s a biter! Get it out!�

Snape grabbed him suddenly by the shoulders and then reached into Draco’s pocket, pulling out a squirmy earthworm. Draco looked at it with narrowed eyes.

“This,� Snape said witheringly, holding the worm in the air, “is hardly a threat.�

Luna waved a hand in the air. “Don’t hold on so tight, Frankie looks pinched!�

Snape looked at her with angry bewilderment. “Is this yours?�

Suddenly, Luna stood up and walked to the front of the class, doing her best impression of the Potions professor. She held out her open hand demandingly.

“Worm!�

Snape stared at her in shock, refusing to hand over Frankie, who was still squirming uncomfortably.

Luna, looking impatient, thrust her hand out again. “Worm!�

Much to everyone’s shock, Snape dropped the worm into his own pocket.

“You can have your worm back,� he intoned, “this evening at detention.�

As Luna walked casually back to her seat, Draco turned around to face her.

“This is war, Loony. So watch your back.� Draco then turned to look at Hermione, who he noticed was smirking victoriously.

“You, as well, Granger. You’ll all pay for this.�

Several students snickered as Malfoy faced the front again, and began subtly trying to smooth back his platinum blonde hair. Much to his chagrin, they continued to laugh quietly throughout the rest of class.

That night, dinner in the Great Hall was raucous and laughter-filled. Not only were people talking about Ginny’s crazy kiss, but Kacey was still wearing her “Harry Potter is So Dreamy� robes. In fact, they had become so popular that several students throughout the day had begun sporting blazed words on their own robes. One girl had the words “Harry Potter for Minister of Magic� on hers, while a Hufflepuff boy had the words “Hufflepuff Quidditch Owns Your Face� on his. Hermione and Ginny had unknowingly started a trend.

More importantly, the entire school had heard about Draco and the earthworm incident. Several students had seen him in the hall and stopped to do impressions of his frantic earthworm-dance. Malfoy was furious, and quite obviously sending glares of pure hatred towards the Gryffindor table. He had given up on threatening Luna, she simply didn’t seem to care.

Harry leaned forward over his plate, causing Ron to lean in as well.

“We ought to be on guard,� Harry warned. “We may have started a prank war.�

Ginny gave Hermione a grin. “It was worth it, and still is. Malfoy’s going to be paying for this for a long time!� Hermione grinned sheepishly.

“He’s right, you know,� Ron muttered somberly. “We should be prepared.�

Neville turned in his seat to look back at the Slytherin table. He was met with dozens of angry glares.

“No one’s as devious as a Slytherin,� Neville whimpered.

“It’s not about deviousness,� Hermione said matter-of-factly. “It’s about being clever, and (she gave Ron a quick smile) being prepared.�

That night, the Gryffindor common room was all abuzz, as everyone had heard about Ginny’s wildly unexpected kiss with Amy, and her even wilder kiss with Harry. Incidentally, Harry spent most of that evening pretending to polish his glasses on his sleeve and decline comments. The biggest subject on the lips of the Gryffindors, however, was Malfoy’s hilarious encounter with the rogue earthworm.

“Where is Luna, and her naughty little Frankie?� spoke a strikingly tall blonde.

“Where do you think, Jacqueline?� Lavender answered. “Snape was so furious he extended her already lengthy number of detentions even further. He’s got her for months!�

“Oh, how miserable for her!�

Hermione shook her head. “Nothing makes Luna miserable, not even Snape.�

“I’d give anything to see what she’s doing to him now,� Harry pondered aloud. “She makes that vein above his left eyebrow pop out. One day she might just drive him mad!�

“I spoke to her earlier,� Hermione informed them as she took a seat by the fireplace. “She said Snape was going to have her scrub Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom.�

“Blimey!� Ron gasped. “That’s done it! Snape’s found the one person nuttier than Luna!�

Suddenly Ginny got a grin on her face. “If Snape sent her to Myrtle’s bathroom, there’s no way he’d stick around, right?�

Hermione looked at her warily, fearing she knew what Ginny was thinking.

“I say we sneak out to the second floor and go meet Luna! No one will know, it’ll be a blast!�

Ron looked at her incredulously. “You’re suggesting that we voluntarily go to detention?�

“What else have you got to do?�

“Homework!� Hermione interrupted, practically shouting. “You all have plenty of homework you could be doing!�

“Myrtle’s it is, then.� Ron said with a grin.

After much debate, five brave Gryffindors sneaked past Prefects and slipped with ease down moving staircases toward the second floor.

“Why didn’t you bring your Invisibility cloak?� Ron hissed.

“There’s five of us,� came Harry’s reply. “We can’t all fit under it!�

Neville started mumbling to himself nervously as the five of them navigated through the dark hallways. “If we get caught, that’s ten points each… we’d lose fifty house points!�

“All the more reason to hush, so we don’t get caught!� Ginny whispered.

Soon, they arrived at the lonely, weathered door of the haunted bathroom. Hermione pushed the door open quietly and called out. First came a polite greeting from Luna, and then…

“What are you all doing in my bathroom?� Myrtle howled. She appeared instantly from behind the sinks and hovered in front of them, her ghostly hands on her hips. “First that pallid, hook-nosed old man and now-� suddenly Myrtle’s eyes rested on Harry’s familiar face. “Hello, Harry,� Myrtle said coyly, her voice softening. “I thought you’d never come by!�

“Um, Hello, Myrtle,� Harry mumbled awkwardly, trying to look through her. “Where’s Luna?�

Myrtle stiffened once again, hovering above the sinks. “She’s by the stalls, back there. Hmph!� With that, Myrtle dove down a drain and disappeared with a wail.

“I think she loves you, mate,� Ron said solemnly, trying to hide his laughter. “How can you kiss your girlfriend if your face goes right through her?� Harry punched him in the arm as the walked further into the abandoned bathroom. There in the shadows, Luna sat on the tile floor with a small cauldron and a scrub brush. She waved the scrub-brush in the air, directing them toward her. Tiny bubbles and suds flew off and landed gently in her messy blonde hair.

“I thought I’d start from the back,� Luna explained, “and scrub my way to the front.� She sighed, looking up at Ginny and Hermione. “That wicked, undead man took my worm, my wand, and my last swizzlestick. It’s a bleeding travesty.�

Hermione smiled as she pulled her wand from her pocket. “We don’t have worms or swizzlesticks,� she said with a laugh, “but we did bring our wands!� Hermione pointed her wand up in the air and spun it in a circle.

“Scourgify!"

A wave of blue light wiped through the room like an electric wave. When the bathroom darkened again, they all squinted their eyes.

“Looks clean to me!� Ginny offered with a shrug.

“But how will I explain this full cauldron of soapy water I’ve still got?� Luna pondered aloud.

Ginny grinned mischievously as she walked toward it and picked it up by the handles. Without a moment of hesitation, she dumped the soapy water onto the floor. She and Ron gave each other a look and darted over to the back wall.

“One… Two…Three!� Suddenly they broke into a mad dash across the soapy tiles and began sliding on their feet. Ginny spun off and grabbed onto the edge of a sink, but Ron slipped back onto his rear end and slid straight into the wall of sinks. The Weasleys cracked up laughing.

“We do this at the Burrow when we have to clean the kitchen,� Ginny explained, making her way cautiously over the soapy floor. “It’s loads of fun!� Neville, seeing this, backed into a corner.

Luna, however, looked entranced. She immediately took off her shoes and pulled her long, purple socks off her feet and tucked them into her shoes. She retreated to the back wall, but instead of running across the floor, she began spinning like a top on her bare feet. Pirouette after pirouette after lopsided pirouette, she twirled right into a stall door with a bang. Hermione slipped after her, to find that she was draped over the broken toilet, laughing maniacally. Hermione tried to pull her up, but fell forward as well, landing with her arm in the toilet. She screeched as Ron doubled over laughing.

She whipped her head around. “Ronald! Think that’s funny, do you?� Hermione said, withdrawing her arm from the rusted old toilet. Ron looked aghast as she walked toward him, holding her dripping wet arm out like a zombie.

“Give us a hug, Ron!� She squealed, chasing after him. She got too much momentum, however, and crashed right into his back, causing them both to fall flat on their stomachs in the soapy water. Ginny came tip-toeing over, but slipped as well, landing flat on her back.

“Oh, someone’s missed a spot,� Harry said with a laugh as he slid carefully over to Ginny. “A little help?� Suddenly, he grabbed Ginny’s hands and began dragging her across the floor. She squealed, twisting hard so that she flipped over onto her stomach. This caused Harry’s arms to twist and he, too, came splashing onto the floor. Harry crawled up on his elbows and grabbed a lock of Ginny’s hair, and began pretending to scrub the floor next to her head with it. Little did Harry know, however, that Hermione was sneaking up behind him.

“Augamenti!� She called out. Harry looked up just in time to see a stream of water come spewing from the tip of her wand, soaking him completely. He sputtered as water poured down his messy locks in into his face.

“I’ve got her, Harry!� Ron shouted, sliding towards them. Ginny jumped on his back, but to no avail. Ron shook an arm free and pointed it at Hermione.

“Augamenti!�

Hermione screamed as Ron blasted her with a stream of water. Hermione’s wavy brown hair hung down her face as she scowled angrily. Ginny, who was still clinging to Ron’s neck, was not amused. She pointed her wand down the back of Ron’s shirt.

“Augamenti!� Ginny called triumphantly. Ron screamed in an oddly high pitch as water shot down the back of his trousers.

“Blimey, that’s cold!� Ron wrapped his arms around his chest, his soaking red hair sticking up in odd places like a bird’s nest. He and Hermione both were shivering and wet. Harry gave his head a shake, tossing water at Ginny. She shoved him playfully.

“Shhh!� Neville hissed. He was crouched by the door, the only one in the bathroom left dry. “Someone’s coming!�

The group scrambled through the sudsy water, running towards the bathroom stalls. Hermione and Ginny shoved their wands in their pockets and crammed into a stall together, pulling the door shut behind them. Harry jumped into another, standing on top of the toilet to hide his legs. Ron and Neville slipped and slid into stalls near the back, cursing quietly to themselves as they pulled the doors shut. Luna was sitting in a puddle, patiently putting her left sock back on. Just in time, a small hand holding a wand poked out of a stall door.

“Scourgify!� Hermione whispered. In a flash, the room was dry once again, and bubble-free.

The door flew open, and Snape entered grandly, his robes flowing. He stopped in front of Luna, looking down at her with disdain. She had already managed to pull her left sock on, and was now concentrating on the right.

“Miss Lovegood,� He hissed. She paid no attention, now slipping her feet into her shoes.

“Miss Lovegood!�

Luna stood up, smoothing her robes out. Meanwhile, Harry, Ginny, Hermione, Ron and Neville were all desperately holding their collective breath behind stall doors.

Luna held out both her hands, palms open.

“Worm, wand.�

Snape looked down at her with black, beady eyes. He was nearly shaking with fury as he reached into pocket and produced her wand, placing it firmly in her hand. Wordlessly, he then reached into his chest pocket. He slowly removed the worm and dropped it into Luna’s other hand. She instinctively clutched the earthworm to her chest.

“Frankie must be starving!� She cooed, petting the worm tenderly. “He looks dreadfully thin, haven’t you cared for him at all?�

Snape raised an eyebrow. “If I ever see this thing again, I’ll slice it, dice it, and use it in a potion.� With that, he turned on his heel and left the bathroom. Moments later, Harry, Ron, Neville, Ginny and Hermione came tumbling out of their stalls, laughing wildly.

As soon as they all got back to their beds, they all fell happily asleep. The next day would be quite a long one.

Professor Binns looked on airily as his History students filed into the classroom. It was Gryffindors and Ravenclaws this afternoon, shuffling their feet and slowly taking their seats. Harry and Ron sat together of course, immediately throwing their textbooks open so as to look studious. Ron leaned his head on his hand and began to fall asleep sitting up, his eyes fluttering. Harry leaned forward to nudge Hermione, who had taken the desk in front of him. Next to her was a Ravenclaw named Dani, who had deep brown eyes almost as dark as her hair. Dani turned back a moment to glance at the two boys, and then leaned in close to Hermione.

“Psst! Hermione!�

She looked up from her textbook. Dani had her head down, trying to avoid being seen by their ghostly Professor. Hermione raised an eyebrow.

“What’s the story on you and Ron?� Dani whispered, giving a nod toward the handsome redhead.

Hermione looked taken aback. “What do you mean, ‘the story’?�

“He obviously likes you.�

Alisa and Hermione both turned in their seats. There behind them, Harry was doodling in his textbook and Ron’s sleepy face was propped up on his hand. His mouth was hanging open like a fish.

“Oh, obviously,� Hermione said sarcastically. “He’s drooling over me right now!�

It was half-true, at that moment, a tiny droplet of saliva was hanging dangerously on the corner of Ron’s mouth.

Suddenly, Lavender let out a loud “Ahem�. She was sitting with Parvati at the desk in front of Hermione’s.

“What?� Hermione hissed with a blush, realizing she’d been caught staring at Ron. Lavender discreetly slipped a piece of paper to Hermione and then faced the front again. Professor Binns floated back and forth before the blackboard as he lectured, but no matter… the notes were always visible through his transparent form.

Hermione laughed to herself as she read Lavender’s note. She gave her a quick nod and then balled up the parchment in her hand. Just as Binns turned to write on the blackboard, Hermione turned around in her seat and lightly tossed the balled-up note through the air. The moment it smacked against Ron’s front teeth, it startled him so quickly that his face slid out of his hand and he slammed face-first into his textbook. He raised his head with a groan, wiping the drool from his chin.

Harry let out a chuckle and placed his hand on the desk, aiming carefully for a moment. Suddenly, -flick!- the slightly damp wad of parchment sailed through the air, through Professor Binns transparent right knee, and rolled beneath the blackboard. Hermione raised an admonishing eyebrow at him.

You started it, he mouthed at her.

When History was finally over, they poured out into the hall with the other students. The trio was alarmed to find that the dares they’d used involving fiery writing on people’s robes had indeed become quite a fad. As Harry, Ron and Hermione waited outside the classroom door, a tall Ravenclaw named Sophie slinked by them. Scrawled in fiery lettering across the back of her robes, read:

No one’s hotter
than Harry Potter

Harry pretended to wipe his glasses off on his sleeve, but Hermione couldn’t help but giggle. Ron, however, simply couldn’t stop yawning. Finally, Luna emerged from the classroom.

“Hello, Harry! Hermione! Ronald!� she said, nodding to the three of them. A moment later, Neville came running out as well.

“Can I borrow your notes later, Hermione?� he said breathlessly.

“You can have them when I’m finished with them!� Ron said crankily.

Hermione huffed. “What makes you think I’ll let any of you copy my notes?�

“You always do,� Harry reminded her.

“You can look at my notes,� Luna offered. Ron shook his head, eyes widening.

As they walked down the stairs toward the Great Hall, a tall, blonde Slytherin was watching from a few flights above. Draco smirked as he gave Crabbe and Goyle a nod.

“Let’s do it.�

Draco walked with determination through the stony halls of Hogwarts, his two closest friends flanking his sides.

“Uh… how will you know what to look for?� Goyle asked shyly. He knew Draco got mad when he asked questions, as his questions were often stupid.

“Don’t worry about it,� Draco snapped back. “I told you I’d planned it, idiot. Do you have the sodding pouch?� Goyle nodded. “That’s all you need to worry about, then!�

As they walked, an unusual silence deafened them. Everyone else in school was in the Great Hall having lunch. Crabbe’s stomach growled audibly loud, which made Draco shake his head. Minutes later, they stood in front of Snape’s office.

“Alohamora,� Draco said with a cocky grin, pointing his wand at the intricate doorknob. It made a loud clicking sound, and Draco let himself in. Snape’s office was dark and dank, and there was another room just inside of it where he kept his many potion ingredients.

Crabbe stood outside the door as a lookout while Goyle entered the supply closet with Draco. The shelves were lined with bottles and vials of different colors, as well as jars containing many different kinds of plant life.

Disturbingly, many of the jars contained hideous-looking substances whose origins were quite questionable. Draco climbed up a step ladder, running his finger across the tiny, handwritten labels. Finally he laughed with relief. He pulled down a jar full of tiny green buds covered in thorns. Goyle obediently held open the pouch while Draco dropped a handful into it. With one last look around, the boys disappeared back out into the hall.

Hermione waved goodbye to Luna, who was walking away with a short blonde named Lisa. As they exited the Great Hall, Ron stretched his arms out above his head.

“I’m so full,� he said with a happy groan.

“Did you notice anything weird?� Harry asked aloud, ignoring him.

“You mean Draco?� Hermione said concernedly. Ron looked at them both with a blank stare.

“He and his two stupid minions were absent from lunch today,� Ginny explained.

“Yeah, right,� Ron laughed. “Crabbe and Goyle never miss a meal.�

“Maybe they’re in the Hospital wing?� Neville said hopefully. “They can’t play any jokes on us if their petrified or something.�

Ginny laughed, nearly dropping her books. “I hope they’re afflicted with explosive vomiting!�

“Well, we shall know directly,� Hermione said loudly, speaking over them. “We have Potions with the Slytherins. Let’s hurry on, now!�

At that instant, however, Ron had stopped in his tracks. Hermione spun around, giving him a very stern look. He didn’t notice it, however, as Valentina Munroe was walking towards them. Valentina had shoulder-length blonde hair , bright blue eyes, and as many freckles as the sky had stars. Hermione fumed as the lovely fellow Gryffindor approached them. She stopped in front of Ron, who’s mouth was hanging open.

“You’ve got something on your robes,� she said plainly, brushing a few biscuit crumbs from Ron’s chest. He gave a little squeak, his mouth still agape. She smiled awkwardly before continuing down the hall. Ron slowly looked down at his chest where her hand had just been.

“What’s with you and blondes?� Harry asked incredulously. He was of course referring to Fleur.

Hermione grabbed Ron by the collar, yanking him forward. “One foot in front of the other!� She snipped, practically dragging him through the hall. Ginny and Harry followed close behind, desperately trying not to laugh.

Luna and Lisa walked outside into the sunny, overgrown courtyard to find a group of their fellow housemates sitting at the stone benches. Lisa ran right over to them, but Luna approached cautiously.

“Tell us how detention went!� Lisa said brightly, as though Luna had come back from a tropical vacation.

“How do you think?� a girl named Danielle interrupted, laughing. She had curly, dark brown hair and had her wand tucked behind her ear. “She had detention with Snape! He’s a blood-sucking, hook-nosed old knob!!� Suddenly, Danielle stood up and held out her arms like a zombie.

“Miss Lovegood,� Danielle said witheringly, doing her best impression of the professor. “For detention this evening you must polish my hideous, greasy face!� The girls squealed in disgust, but Luna held her hand up to her chin, deep in thought.

“What are you thinking about?� asked Lulu warily. The other Ravenclaws got quiet. There was no way to guess what was on Luna’s mind.

“He does have a problem with that face, doesn’t he?� Luna pondered aloud.

“That’s a sodding understatement!� Lulu replied.

Luna continued stroking her chin, as Frankie poked his head out of her pocket. “Maybe if I fix it for him,� she mused, “Professor Snape will be nicer to me…�

A few moments passed as Luna stared blankly ahead, lost in her thoughts. A blonde named Claire waved her hand in front of Luna’s face. Luna looked at her oddly.

“What does Frankie do?� Claire asked.

“What?�

“What does he do?� She repeated. “I’ve got a cat named Babe Ruth. He’s a Manx, which means he’s got no tail, so he runs funny. He can climb really well, though, and jump really high.�

“Don’t you mean a Minx?" Lulu asked. Claire shook her head with a laugh, wadded up a piece of parchment, and threw it at her.

“I’ve got a hamster,� piped up a brunette named Scarlette. “Her name’s Pennyweather, and she’s got this little wheel, it’s really cute. Sometimes she stuffs her little face full of food pellets-�

“Where’d she learn that?� Lulu joked. Scarlette was notoriously thin, but how she stayed that way was a mystery because she ate like a rabid animal. Where all that food went, nobody knew. Some even joked that she had a hollowed-out leg.

“Anyway,� Scarlette continued, “Pennyweather isn’t too chubby because she runs on that wheel all day and night. What does Frankie do?�

Luna reached into her pocket and pulled out the wriggling little earthworm, holding it gently in the palm of her hand.

“Frankie is a very good listener,� Luna said proudly, leaning her face down close to her hand. “Aren’t you, Frankie?� she cooed. “So open-minded!� Suddenly the girls remembered why they’d thought Luna was weird in the first place.

Meanwhile, in Potions, the gang realized they’d arrived quite early. Possibly due to the fact that Hermione stormed all the way there.

“What’s up her skirt?� Ron asked Harry as they sat down. Hermione was ignoring him and talking animatedly to Neville.

Harry sighed. “Don’t you remember anything?�

“What?�

“Ron, Valentina came up to you and you went utterly mental. You didn’t even say anything to her; you just sort of squeaked.�

Ron looked aghast and put his face in his hands. “Murder me, Harry,� Ron mumbled sadly.

“I’d be happy to,� came a snide voice from above. Ron looked up from his hands to see Draco staring down at him. The devious Slytherin leaned over their desk, looking Ron in the face. Harry could’ve sworn he heard something drop into Ron’s cauldron, but dismissed the thought.

“You can’t talk to girls, you can’t make potions,� Draco said arrogantly, “you might as well just take a flying leap, Weasley! You’re a waste!�

Harry stood up immediately, jabbing his wand into Draco’s chest.

“Back off, Malfoy, or it’s the ferret-life for you!�

Suddenly, they heard footsteps nearing the classroom door. Harry slipped his wand back into his pocket just in time to hide it from Snape, who stormed into the classroom. As Harry sat down, he noticed that Crabbe and Goyle had been standing in front of Hermione and Neville’s table as well. Harry instantly got a sinking feeling that something was amiss.

Snape started right in on his lecture, a potion for removing warts. They grudgingly opened their textbooks and began chopping and skinning the various ingredients they’d been given. Pretty soon, the entire class had set their cauldrons boiling. Harry looked up to see Draco looking back at him, smirking devilishly. Suddenly, Harry realized he was up to something. Before he could do anything, however, his and Ron’s cauldrons, along with Hermione’s and Neville’s all simultaneously exploded with inky green clouds of smoke. The Slytherins burst out laughing like hyenas.

Ron and Harry looked at each other, pointing wildly.

“You’re green!� they shouted simultaneously. They both had entirely green faces, like they’d been dyed like Easter eggs. Harry wiped green goo off of his glasses. The substance had splattered their robes and hair as well. Ron looked over at Hermione and Neville, who also had dark green skin. Hermione looked as though she might cry.

“What’s this?� Snape hissed, storming over to their tables. They looked at him confoundedly. “You imbeciles have obviously been cheating, helping each other… this is what happens when you cheat. You make a careless mistake, and now you all look quite foolish. Twenty points from Gryffindor.�

Harry started to protest, but Snape held up a hand to silence him.
“This explains the large amount of Thornmallow missing from my supply cabinets. You’ll serve detention with me this evening, for stealing. That will be all.� With his beady eyes black and furious, he dismissed the class. Harry looked back at Draco, steel-eyed.

“Nice color,� hissed the snobby Slytherin. Harry scowled. The war was on.

Four green-faced, pouting Gryffindors walked glumly to the Hospital wing. Ron reached over and put an arm around Hermione, who leaned her head on his shoulder. In the Hospital wing, they’d have some time to mull this over and come up with a plan of revenge. But most importantly, to look a bit less like plantlife.

Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville entered the Hospital Wing with their faces down. If their faces weren’t so green, they’d all be blushing furiously. It was a long walk there from Potions, and a lot of people had seen their oddly inked faces and hair. Harry pointed to four adjacent beds and they all sat down and waited patiently as Madame Pomfrey poured the contents of a cream-colored bottle into a large bowl. Hermione grimaced at the thick, plaster smell arising from the stir. Whatever the cure for this miscolored condition, she just hoped she didn’t have to drink it.

Neville had to go first. He sat upright on his bed, shutting his eyes tightly and whimpering. Madame Pomfrey chuckled to herself as she smeared the potion over Neville’s neck, his scrunched little face, and then into his hair. Hermione gave a curious look.

“This will absorb the Thornmallow root,� Madame Pomfrey explained as she neared Hermione. “The smell isn’t very pleasant, but you should be to your normal colouring in a few hours time.�

“A few hours?!� Ron roared, his inky-green face aghast. “Might as well kill me!� He scoffed and threw himself face-first onto his pillow with a groan.

“And we’ll miss dinner!� came Ron’s muffled voice.

Hermione was the next victim of Madame Pomfrey’s pasty concoction. But she held her head high and shut her eyes obligingly. The smell of glue filled her nose as she felt the creamy stuff smeared down her face and neck and through her hair. As soon as she was done, Hermione reached her hands back and tied her slicked-back hair into a bun. She could feel the stuff working a little, it felt like a breeze was blowing on her skin. A really awful-smelling breeze.

Suddenly, Hermione noticed several other students in beds around the room. She’d been so nervous coming in that she hadn’t even noticed them. One girl she recognized, a Hufflepuff named Kelsey Ann, was sitting up in her bed holding an acoustic guitar. Her right shin was covered in thick bandages.

“What happened to you?� Hermione asked curiously, wrinkling her nose at the unrelenting glue-smell.

Kelsey leaned over her guitar, brown eyes darting back and forth. “You know that dark-haired girl Fateema?�

“Yes?� Hermione whispered back.

“She’s been keeping a fire-crab in the dorm.�

As Hermione’s eyes widened, Kelsey leaned back and propped her bandaged leg up on a pillow and began to strum on her guitar as though these kinds of Hospital Wing visits were a regular occurence.

"Where does she keep it, exactly?" Hermione hissed.

"It was in Fateema's trunk, but it burnt through all her undergarments. I was about to pounce on it with a pillow when it shot its bottom off at us!"

Hermione looked over to Kelsey Ann’s right, where a somewhat chubby, Asian girl named Naz sat with both her hands bandaged. As she held them up, they looked like giant oven mitts.

“Fire-crab,� she repeated sullenly.

Hermione smirked and turned to look at her fellow Gryffindors. Ron’s face was covered with the mystery cure, and his red hair slicked back as well. He looked furious.

“We’ve got to plan revenge,� he said, his voice gaining an eerie pitch. “And it’s got to be smelly… and gooey… and… and… worse than this!� Ron grabbed his pillow and shoved it against his face, growling angrily. Madame Pomfrey came back over to him, reprimanding him and smearing more potion on his face. Ron looked especially dismal.

Harry had put his glasses on the desk beside him, and for the first time ever, his unruly hair was slicked back as well.

Hermione smirked at him. With his glasses off, Harry had these wide eyes that made him look owl-like.

“We finally found something that’ll tame your hair,� Hermione laughed. Harry got a crooked smile.

“Look at yourself!� Ron said smugly. “With your hair pulled back like that, you look just like McGonagall!�

Harry snorted with laughter as he and Ron exchanged a high-five.

Hermione pointed an accusing finger towards Ron, who had a drop of goo rolling off his chin. “You should talk!� Hermione stammered. “With your flaming red hair and your green face, you look like a Christmas ornament!�

Both Harry and Neville laughed so hard they nearly rolled off their beds. Ron crossed his arms, pouting.

“Oh, get off it!� Came a small voice. The four Gryffindors looked over to see a girl with curly, auburn hair and her arm in a sling looking at them with an arched brow.

Amy looked at all their green faces appraisingly. “Why don’t you lay off each other? It’s so irritating! If you don’t start coming up with an idea to get Malfoy and his buddies back, I’ll kick all your silly green arses!�

“Our bums aren’t green,� Neville said glumly. “Just our heads, thank Merlin!�

Hermione folded her legs up on her bed and rested her chin on her hand.

“So far, we know that the stuff Malfoy used to sabotage our potions is a herb called Thornmallow. Obviously it has properties that leave a semi-permanent color depending on its usage.

“Yawn!� Ron said sarcastically.

“Perhaps,� Hermione continued, “we could get them back in kind!� Hermione smiled proudly to herself. “If we can find a herb that has reddish properties, we can turn them into Gryffindor colours!�

Harry and Ron applauded and shook hands. It was a very good idea indeed, and very fitting.

Neville immediately began rummaging through his book-bag.

“I think I know of something,� Neville said hurriedly. He pulled out a large, rust-colored book and lay it open on his bed. It was his favorite book; an anthology of magical herbs and plantlife. Neville turned to the index, flipped through the pages, and held the book up for the others to see.

“This is Shady Crimson,� Neville said proudly. This was all fascinating to him. On the yellowed pages of the book in his hands, a delicate drawing of a leafy red weed was surrounded by faded text.

“Apparently,� he continued, “it only grows near large trees, and blooms mostly at night or in otherwise dark areas. It’s often used in sedative potions, but only after it’s been plucked, because the leaves have dye-like side effects!�

Hermione beamed. “That’s perfect! We’ll just have to sneak out tonight and look for some!�

“Would that be before or after detention?� Harry asked glumly.

Before Hermione could respond, a knock resounded in the room. Madame Pomfrey opened the door to reveal Luna standing idly in the doorway with a large tray of food.

“Brought your dinner,� she said airily. Ron practically dove off his bed

“Save some for the rest of us,� Harry cautioned, jumping off his bed as well.

Luna laid the tray on top of Hermione’s bed and the guys all pulled up chairs and started snatching at forks. Ron had a chicken leg in his mouth before a word was spoken.

“Thank you, Luna,� Hermione sighed. “It was so kind of you to think to bring us dinner!� Hermione elbowed Ron in the stomach, nearly causing him to choke on his chicken leg.

“Yesh, tanks,� Ron mumbled, chewing loudly.

Hermione laid a napkin on her lap before picking up a warm biscuit. “I do hope all the green is gone before detention,� she mused aloud. “I’d rather not hear any snide comments about it from Snape.�

Suddenly it occurred to Harry that Luna hadn’t asked yet why they all had green faces and gooey curative smeared over their faces and hair. She hadn’t even looked surprised.

“How did you hear about the potion mishap?� Harry asked, looking sideways at Luna as he swigged some pumpkin juice.

“What potion mishap?� She mused.

Hermione laughed. “Surely you’ve noticed were as green as grass!�

Luna shrugged. “I thought it would be impolite to mention it. But if I ever turn green, you'll let me know, won’t you?�

That evening, full-bellied and significantly less green, the four Gryffindors stood hesitantly outside Snape’s office door. Hermione took a deep breath and knocked on the heavy wood. When Snape opened the door, the smell of his dark, musty office filled the air. The four students, who still smelled a little of glue, tried not to crinkle their noses.

“Wands,� Snape said witheringly. Four wands were dropped into his hands. Suddenly, they became aware of the sound of footsteps pounded up behind them. It was Luna. They’d nearly forgotten that she’d earned permanent detention with Snape. Luna skidded to a stop, whipping her wand at Snape’s hand. It hit him smack in the chest and clattered to the floor.

“So sorry I’m late,� Luna said breathlessly. “Had to tuck Frankie in for the night.� Snape glared at her with his beady, black eyes. Neville dropped down suddenly and scrambled to pick up Luna's wand and placed it on top of the others in Snape’s open hand. He closed his fist immediately.

“Tonight, the five of you will be serving detention in the Herbology Greenhouses, picking Thornmallow to make up for that which was stolen from my private shelf.�

“That wasn’t us, and you know it!� Harry said defiantly.

“Another outburst like that, Potter, and you’ll be sharing indefinite detention with Miss Lovegood.� This made Luna smile excitedly, giving Harry a pat on the arm.

“Sir,� Hermione said as calmly as possible, “will you be providing us with gloves with which to pull the Thornmallow?�

Snape grimaced. “You know where the Greenhouses are. Get out of my sight. I’ll come for you in two hours time.�

With that, Snape retreated into his office and slammed the great wooden door in their faces.

Hermione looked over at her friends with a smile. “We’re going to the Greenhouses,� she whispered.

“What’s so great about that? Ron hissed.

“If we hurry, we could look around for some Shady Crimson….�

The Greenhouses were dimly lit with torches along the walkway. In the shadows, the vines that twisted along the walls looked sinister and threatening. Neville motioned them all after him, toward the third greenhouse. Nothing was visible through the glass, just plants of different kinds pressed against it.

"I think Professor Sprout keeps the Thornmallow in here," Neville stammered. "I know what it looks like, so I'll stay here to help pull it up. Hermione, you take Luna with you to find some Shady Crimson."

Hermione nodded. "We'll meet you guys back here!" She quickly grabbed Luna's hand and pulled her away from the greenhouses and out the main gate, which creaked with age. Hermione looked around. Over by Hagrid's hut there stood several very large trees... if there was any Shady Crimson, they'd likely be there.

As they sneaked up to the hut, Hermione and Luna crouched below the window and slowly rose their heads up, peeking inside. Hagrid was deep asleep, his dog Fang snoring at his feet.

"No need to wake him," Hermione whispered. Luna pulled an orange stick of candy from her pocket and tip-toed after Hermione wordlessly.

Finally, after ten minutes of searching in the dark, Hermione found a patch of Shady Crimson. She plucked several weeds from the ground, careful not to touch the leaves. After dropping them in her pocket, she and Luna ran quickly back to the greenhouses, beaming with victory.

Hours later, Harry, Ron, Neville and Hermione stepped into the Gryffindor common-room. Luna had gone back to her own, as she had recently become high in demand with her fellow Ravenclaws. Several students turned and looked in shock at the gang, who were quite disheveled.

All four of them still had a slight green hue to their skin which made them look rather sickly. Their faces were all caked with dirt and twigs stuck out of Hermione's bushy hair. But the weirdest part was that they were all grinning madly.

"Get in another fight with the Whomping Willow?" asked a pretty Asian girl, followed by some chuckles.

"Can't you tell, Roop?" Ginny replied as she arose from the couch. "Snape buried them alive and they dug themselves out!"

Roop tossed her long black hair and reached into her robes pocket, pulling out a handkerchief. She tossed it at Harry, who caught it instantly. His glasses were crooked and speckled with dirt, but still he smiled.

"Out with it!" Ginny exclaimed, giving her brother a shove. "I heard about what Malfoy and his monkeys did to you in potions, are you getting them back or not?"

Hermione nodded and reached into her pocket. She delicately pulled out a stalk of Shady Crimson from the stem, giving a shy smile towards Ron.

The Gryffindor common-room crackled with excitement as Hermione carefully held up a twig of Shady Crimson. All eyes were on this mysterious herb.

“What’s it do?� asked a thin girl with waves of brown hair.

“Prissy, come on,� said her friend Annai, as she pinned back her auburn hair. “It’s obviously poisonous, just look at it! Maybe it’ll give the entire house of Slytherins the runs!�

Priscilla laughed. “It looks rather plain to me, despite being quite red. Does it explode?�

“Hermione will tell us,� Annai said with a wink, her eyes dark as coal. “Won’t you, Hermione?�

The gang all took seats around the room; Hermione and Ginny by the fireplace as usual, Ron and Harry sat on the couch. Neville sat on a pouf in the corner, his face showing just a hint of remnant green hue. He looked rather sickly.

“I’m sure you’ve all heard that Malfoy and his goons turned us green in Potions earlier,� Hermione said as she addressed the room. She was answered with several nods.

“The whole school’s talking about it,� Annai said with a frown.

Hermione twirled the leafy stem of Shady Crimson in her hand, smiling decisively. “We’re going to turn them the colour of glory! The colour of bravery! The colour of Gryffindor!!�

The common room burst into a round of applause, Ginny whistling and howling.

Suddenly, Ron waved his hand in the air, gaining several curious looks from his housemates.

“Hermione,� he said coyly, tucking a finger under his chin. “Truth or Dare?�

“Er… truth!� She stammered, wondering what he was up to.

“How do you plan on getting this stuff close to the Slytherins?�

Hermione’s jaw dropped and she looked down, anxiously tucking a lock of wavy hair behind her ear.

“I hadn’t thought of that actually...�

“Just as I thought,� Ron said coolly, giving a sideways glance to Harry. The green-eyed boy nodded in response. Without a word, Ron snatched the leafy twig out of Hermione’s hand and the two boys headed for the portrait door.

“Do either of you plan on telling me what you’re doing with my Shady Crimson?� she demanded, her hands on her hips.

Harry sighed, taking off his glasses to wipe them on his sleeve. “Hermione, me and Ron had a chat about it. We know how to get this stuff into Draco and his mates. We can’t tell you, you’ll only be angry.�

Ron lowered his eyes. “She’s already angry,� he mumbled, trying not to look up.

“You’re going to the house elves, aren’t you?� She cried, hands on her hips. “What about S.P.E.W?�

“Spew, who?� Ron said innocently as he shoved Harry through the portrait hole. Suddenly, they were gone. Outside, the muffled sounds of two boys hitting the floor could be heard.

Hermione sat down on her pillow again, arms folded. Those two were going to involve the house elves in the scheme, it just wasn’t fair. Ginny fretted, noting the sudden tension that had filled the room.

“Truth or Dare?� Ginny exclaimed, pointing to a quiet girl with braided brown hair. The girl looked to her left and right, hoping against hope that Ginny hadn’t actually picked her.

“C’mon, Martha, truth or dare!?� Ginny said with a grin, cocking her head to the side.

“Oh, erm,.. truth?� Martha stammered.

“Who’ve you got a crush on?�

All eyes turned to Martha. She was so shy, no one really knew much about her. The next words to come from her mouth were sure to be scandalous.

“I… don’t want to say,� Martha said with a blush.

“Rules are rules,� Annai called, pelting her with jelly beans.

“Alright, alright!� Martha said, holding her hands in front of her face. “His name is Johnny Swaos… he’s in-�

“Slytherin?� said a 5th year named Jess. “You fancy a Slytherin?� Martha put her hands over her face and shoved her face into the couch cushion.

“I can’t help who I fancy!�

“You’re mad!� Jess continued, crossing her arms. “Who would ever like a stinking Slytherin? I think you’ve braided your hair a bit too tight, there, Martha!�

“Oh, back off,� Ginny said teasingly, tossing a pillow at her. Unfortunately Jess wasn’t looking and took a flying pillow to the face, knocking her out of her chair.

“Alright then,� Jess said venomously, getting to her feet. “Truth or Dare, Ginny!�

“Dare, of course!�

Jess rubbed her hands together, eyes sparkling with glee. “I dare you to wear ‘Potter is Hotter’ on the back of your robes all day tomorrow!�

Ginny laughed, her bright red hair shining in the firelight. “Truer words were never spoken. You think that’s a dare? I’ve already gone and kissed a girl! I’ve got no problem wearing that! Sod it, I’ll wear it all week!�

Suddenly, a glimmer in Ginny’s eyes brought the room to silence. In her mind, her own hilarious idea was brewing. She looked up, skimming the room with her eyes.

Meanwhile, Draco had the place of honor in the dark pits of the Slytherin house that evening. He took the satin, hunter-green couch flanked by Crabbe and Goyle. Everyone wanted to hear about their clever prank against the most irritating Gryffindors in school.

“They were absolutely oblivious!� he laughed derisively. “They had no idea we were dropping Thornmallow into their cauldrons. I think sitting next to Longbottom has turned Granger as dumb as a post!�

A fair-skinned girl named Cricket twirled her fingers in her curly red hair flirtatiously. “You’re so clever,� she cooed, sitting nearer to Draco. “I wish I could’ve seen their faces!�

“I saw them,� said Johnny Swaos proudly. He was nearly as blonde as Draco, and quickly moving up in the ranks of Draco’s crew. “They looked like walking pickles in robes.�

“Aren’t you worried they’ll try to get payback?� voiced Bianca, looking at Draco concernedly.

“Of course he isn’t,� Cricket said venemously. “As Slytherins, we always have the upper hand in warfare.�

“I’m just looking out for Dr- I mean, my fellow housemates,� Bianca shot back.

“Ladies, ladies,� Draco said witheringly as he leaned back on the couch with a satisfied grin. “Please, try not to fight over me...�

The next morning, almost every Gryffindor had arrived early to the Great Hall for breakfast. Everyone except Ginny and several other Gryffindor girls, who oddly had yet to arrive. Everyone else was huddled together, whispering. They knew that Hermione and Neville’s plan of revenge involving that mysterious herb was soon to go down.

At the Slytherin table, Johnny noticed that several of the Gryffindors were stealing glances at them.

“Draco, have a look,� Johnny whispered, motioning to the other side of the room. Several of the Gryffindors continued to look over their shoulders at them, almost as if with curiosity or apprehension.

“Let them look,� Draco said grandly. “Anything those kiss-arse Gryffindors have planned, we’ll be ready.

With that, Draco held up his frosty mug of pumpkin juice and clinked glasses with Johnny.

“Cheers!� He said victoriously, clinking mugs with Crabbe and Goyle. They all took a giant swig.

“Oh, it’s on,� Ron whispered excitedly, waving his bacon in the air like a torch of victory. “Any moment now…�

“I don’t want to know,� Hermione said sternly, sporting her S.P.E.W badge on the front of her robes. She was still annoyed that he and Harry had used the house-elves to mick the Slytherin’s pumpkin juice with the leaves of Shady Crimson.

Hermione was about to scold them once again when she heard a sudden burst of frantic yelling. Everyone in the entire Great Hall turned towards the noise. Crabbe and Goyle were pointing their fat fingers in each other’s faces, screaming like madmen.

“You’ve got red on you!� They howled simultaneously. “So do you!�

Draco was holding his butter-knife up like a mirror, howling like a sick dog.

“My face!� he cried, grabbing Johnny by the collar. “What’s happened to my face?!�

The Great Hall began to fill with the sound of snickering. Bianca and Cricket looked at each other in shock, hoping that they hadn’t been afflicted as well. Pansy, however, was looking towards the Gryffindor table with heavy, black eyes.

Suddenly, the doors to the Great Hall burst open. Ginny walked in, followed by several more Gryffindor girls. They marched inside, giving little twirls. Every one of them had the words “Potter is Hotter� written in fiery lettering on the back of their robes.

Ginny gave a victorious smirk to her friends as she took a seat at the table. Roop and Annai followed her, proudly turning this way and that to show their motto with pride. After them came Priscilla, and even Martha, who shuffled in as quickly as possible. Every one of their robes boasted the same.

Potter is Hotter

Finally, a 6th year named Steph strode nonchalantly towards the Slytherin table, giving one last spin to show off her lettered robes.

“You may be flaming red,� Steph announced loudly, staring into Draco’s horrified face. “But Potter is still hotter.� As she turned and walked back to the Gryffindor table, almost the entire Great Hall burst into raucous laughter.

Professor Dumbledore waved his hand, silencing the room, but students continued to snicker to themselves as Draco, Crabbe and Goyle speed-walked out the main doors and ran all the way to the Hospital Wing. Revenge was indeed sweet; they’d be stuck the colour of permanent blushing for hours, at least!

Hermione couldn’t help it, and her stern face cracked into a shy smile. Their revenge couldn’t have gone any better. Ginny threw an arm around the brunette’s shoulder and they, too, toasted their pumpkin juice.

“I swear, the elves didn’t mind helping us,� Harry explained.

“Yeah, the practically worship him,� Ron added, stuffing a forkful of eggs in his mouth. “They loaded us up with enough tarts and cauldron cakes to live off of for a year!�

Neville, who was finally smiling again, turned to look towards the Ravenclaw table.

“Luckily we’ve got potions with the Ravenclaws today,� Neville said with a sigh. “Without the Slytherins to start up with us, maybe Snape will be slightly less… horrible.� Neville shuddered.

“You’re forgetting Luna,� Hermione said plainly. “She’s got that unparalleled ability to make Snape flip his greasy wig.�

“Not today,� Neville stuttered as he stared hopelessly at the back of Luna’s blonde head. “Don’t start with him today…�

As the Gryffindors excitedly ate breakfast all around him, Neville looked nervously towards the Ravenclaw table. Luna was chewing on a strip of bacon, seemingly oblivious to the Ravenclaw girls chattering away around her. Many of them had shoved their textbooks in the place of their plates and were sipping pumpkin juice casually as they studied. How they could be so calm, he could not imagine. Although Neville was relieved that they’d gotten revenge upon Malfoy and his goons, they still had Snape to deal with later that afternoon in Potions.

“Not today,� Neville muttered shakily as he stared at the back of Luna’s blonde head. “Don’t start with him today…�

Suddenly, Neville noticed a pair of blue eyes looking right at him. It was Flora, a close friend of Luna’s, with hair nearly as blonde. She gave Neville a cheerful wave, causing him to blush madly and turn back round in his seat.

“What’s the matter, Harry?� chirped a girl named Juniper as she slid into the seat next to him. “You’re almost as red as Malfoy!�

It was true. The moment Harry had seen the Gryffindor girls come in with their robes all bearing the fiery words “Potter is Hotter�, he’d suddenly become quite interested in his breakfast plate.

“I’m fine,� Harry stammered, his glasses fogging slightly.

“Lucky,� Ron said bitterly, elbowing his green-eyed friend. “You don’t see any girls with blazing dedications to my good looks, do you?�

“I would do it,� Juniper interrupted, “but my robes are already marked, you see.� As she stood and turned to go back to her seat, the words “Hunky Potter� blazed on the back of her robes. Harry immediately began wiping his glasses on his sleeve again, blushing lightly.

“You’re a girl,� Ron said pointedly to Hermione, catching her slightly off guard. “Give me some publicity, will you?�

Hermione, too, was beginning to blush. “Ronald, you say I’m a girl like it’s a recent condition!�

“You’re robes aren’t marked, either,� Ron continued, ignoring her.

“Well, maybe I- I think it’s become a rather silly trend,� Hermione stammered, “and you’d have me be a walking billboard for you? What on Earth would I write? Perhaps ‘Ron wouldn’t know a girl if she hit him in the face’!�

Ron leaned backwards, cringing. “Well don’t write that, it’s terrible! Makes me sound thick!�

Hermione growled as she rose from her seat and stormed out of the hall. Harry put his sleeve over his mouth, trying to hide his laughter. Ron looked at him scornfully, and then turned around to look over at the Ravenclaw table. He bit his lip, searching the long table with his eyes.

“Oi, Demi!� Ron called, waving at a pretty brunette. Demi said something to her fellow Ravenclaws before walking over nonchalantly.

“Transfer from Beauxbatons,� Ron whispered excitedly. Harry groaned.

“’Allo, Ronald!� Demi said cheerfully as she took a seat. “Good morning! ‘Ow are you?�

“Demi,� Ron said with a charming smile, “don’t you have Runes after breakfast with Hermione?�

“Oui, I seet behind her,� Demi replied.

Ron smirked as he picked his book-bag off the ground and began rummaging through it.

“Ever heard of Truth or Dare?� Ron asked as he scribbled fervently on a piece of parchment. Demi leaned forward to peek at the paper with a curious smile playing on her lips.
•

At the Ravenclaw table, Luna’s housemates were abuzz with rumours. Ever since the many confrontations with Snape about his possible Vampirism, Luna had become an unlikely hero.

“What’s the news, Luna?� asked an unusual girl with one green eye and one brown. “I heard you have something new planned for old Snape!� All the other girls fell into a hush.

“I’ve given it some thought, and I believe the professor is quite troubled.�

“By what?�

“His face, of course.� This incited a round of laughs, but Luna remained quite serious as she pulled thoughtfully on one of her earrings. They looked an awful lot like bumblebees.

“It’s quite common,� Luna said somberly. “With such an unfortunate complexion, his self-esteem suffers. The same thing happened with my Uncle Trumbull. Of course, we all call him Uncle Pigsnout. �

The girls all looked at each other in uneasy silence.

“Luna,� Taylor asked, trying not to grin, “what exactly are you going to do to his face?�
•

Draco, Crabbe and Goyle each fumed silently in adjacent beds up in the hospital wing. The Gryffindors only had to bear green faces, but these boys had drunk some sort of potion in their pumpkin juice. The Shady Crimson that Hermione picked had worked its way down their thirsty throats, and the bright red color was evenly distributed all over the three Slytherins’ bodies. Even Draco’s trademark platinum hair was bright red.

“I look like a sodding Weasley!� He hissed, crossing his arms. “Where’s the bloody antidote?� He glared at Madame Pomfrey, who was diligently stirring a large cauldron. The contents smelled exactly like glue.

“Oh dear,� she said to herself, wringing her hands on her apron. “I’m out of sapsucker root. I’ll have to see Professor Snape, but I’ll be back shortly. Do stay here!� With that, she hurried out the door.

“Like I’d ever leave, looking like this!� Draco yelled to no one in particular. “I want this red off immediately!�

Suddenly, a Ravenclaw girl in a bed across the room began to chuckle to herself.

“Think this is funny, do you?� Draco demanded, his pitch rising. “Stop laughing, you little tart!�

“My name is Hilda,� the girl replied, tucking a strand of dirty blonde hair behind her ear. “I can’t believe how dense you are!�

Draco balled up his fists.

“What are you waiting for?� Hilda continued. “Madame Pomfrey was about to tell you before she ran out. All you have to do is drink that potion,� Hilda said as she gestured toward the simmering cauldron with a bandaged arm, “and you’ll be back to your normal coloring immediately!�

Draco narrowed his eyes. “Is that so?�

Hilda nodded, making her most innocent face. “It’s true. I’m studying to become a Healer, you know.�

Draco leapt from his bed immediately and ran to the cauldron. The liquid inside it had the smell, consistency, and colouring of paste. He turned back to see Crabbe and Goyle staring at him with dumbstruck curiosity. Draco grabbed a small cup from the counter and dipped it into the cauldron. With his eyes clenched tight, he took two giant swigs of the stuff before tossing the gooey cup the floor.

Draco whined a little, clutching his belly in disgust. “I’m still sodding red, and I think I might be sick!�

At that moment, Madame Pomfrey opened the door with a gasp, dropping her jar of Sapsucker root to the floor.

“My boy, you didn’t drink it, did you?� Madame Pomfrey said with a horrified tremble.

Before he could answer, Hilda began cackling maniacally from her bed. She’d picked the luckiest time ever to be sent to the hospital wing.
•

Meanwhile, Hermione was just leaving Runes with her books clutched to her chest. She felt particularly warm and hoped she’d settled into a better mood since her argument with Ron. As she smiled to herself, she noticed many of the students in the halls were smiling back at her.

“Mother was right,� Hermione thought to herself, “confidence is contagious. Smile and the world smiles with you!�

Suddenly, a startlingly pretty Chinese girl named Ji-Hyun ran up to Hermione, nearly knocking her down.

“I’m so glad it’s finally happened,� she rambled excitedly. “We’ve all kind of known, and I know I’ve been rooting for you two. It’s been obvious, hasn’t it? We all just think it’s so terribly sweet. And how brave of you! I knew there was a reason you were in Gryffindor instead of with us in Ravenclaw. Nerves of steel, you! Cheers!�

“Erm… thanks, Ji-Hyun!� Hermione said politely. She shook her head in puzzlement and continued down the halls to her next class. Written on the back of her robes in fiery lettering were these words:

Ron Weasley’s got the

cutest bum in the school!
•

When Hermione entered the Potions classroom, Ron had to slap his hand over Harry’s mouth to stifle the laughter. As Hermione obliviously took her seat next to Neville, Ron leaned back and admired the handiwork blazing on the back of Hermione’s robes.

“I can’t believe Demi did it,� Harry whispered.

“She sits behind ‘Mione in Runes, so she could cast Califuego on her robes without her even noticing!�

Several more students entered the classroom, chuckling to themselves. Hermione didn’t notice, as she was deep in conversation with Neville. Luna walked in as well, her earrings buzzing lightly. A few moments later, a tall, dark-haired girl named Kanksha walked up to Hermione and leaned on her desk.

“I have to say I quite agree with you,� Kanksha said loudly, giving Ron a quick, flirtatious look. Kanksha stood up, leaving Hermione quite puzzled, and tossed her long black hair as she walked back to her seat.

Ron’s jaw dropped, his eyes glazing over.

“Kanksha likes my bum!�

Before Harry could respond, Snape burst into the classroom, black robes flowing behind him. He stopped in his tracks, however, just behind Hermione’s row.

“Miss Granger,� he said behind clenched teeth, “This is not an appropriate time or place to show your compliments to Mr. Weasley’s… physique.� Snape smirked at that last word, turned on his heel, and walked to the head of the class. Hermione stood up and took her robe off and held it before her, surrounded by snickering. As she read the emblazoned words, the classroom burst into laughter once again. She turned slowly, looking Ron dead in the eyes. He sunk into his chair with a whimper.

“You’re in for it now,� Harry whispered with a grin.

Hermione laid her robes across her desk, revealing a button-up white shirt and grey skirt. As she took her seat, she noticed a light humming that hadn’t occurred to her before. She turned to look for the source of the noise, and noticed most everyone was looking at Luna. There, from her ears, hung a pair of fuzzy bumblebees. As the class fell silent, the buzzing seemed ever louder.

Snape, who was writing on the blackboard, stopped mid-sentence and turned to face the class.

“What is that noise…� he hissed, looking around the room. Luna promptly raised her hand.

Snape stalked towards her, grimacing. Everyone in the room was practically biting their knuckles.

“I don’t know what’s gotten into you all today,� Snape said witheringly, “but this ridiculousness ends now. No more fiery robes, no more giggling, and certainly no more of that.� Snape pointed at Luna’s left ear, where the bee was buzzing round and round.

“Remove them immediately,� Snape hissed.

“It’s rather hard,� Luna explained. “They are bees, you know.�

Snape moved to grab the bee in his hand, but Luna threw her head back just in time. The two bees hanging from her ears bounced lightly, humming dizzily.

“Careful!� Luna said, furrowing her brow.

Beside her, a girl named Kristen with big blue eyes hidden behind modest glasses was leaning away from Luna and her bumblebees.

“Do it,� she hissed. “Go on, or… or he’ll anger your earrings!�

Luna cocked her head slightly in concentration and pointed her wand right at Snape’s greasy hook nose.

“Scourgify!�

Luna was practically reeling after Professor Snape had tried to snatch at her bumblebee earrings. She gasped at his recklessness and lack of manners. Beside her, a girl named Kristen with big blue eyes hidden behind modest glasses was leaning away from Luna and her bumblebees.

“Do it,� Kristen hissed. “Go on, or… or he’ll anger your earrings!�

Luna cocked her head to the side in concentration and pointed her wand right at Snape’s greasy hook nose.

“Scourgify!�

The classroom filled with screams as a jet of blue light flashed into Snape’s face. With the whooshing sound of a thousand bubbles, his long, greasy hair was blown back; his black, beady eyes wide with shock. A moment later, he was completely unrecognizable. His shoulder-length hair was frizzy and wild like it had just been shampooed and rubbed over with a towel. His hair puffed out like a triangle around his head. His face was spotlessly pale, like chalk. Suddenly, Snape crinkled his large nose. Luna leaned back warily just as Snape sneezed a burst of soapy bubbles. The students burst into a round of laughter.

Wordlessly, Snape grabbed Luna up by the wrist and began dragging her from the room. Her earrings hummed irritably.

“Are you angry, Professor?� she questioned, stumbling over her feet. “It doesn't look so bad…!�

Snape tossed her into the hall and shut the door behind him, leaving the Potions classroom unattended. Everyone looked around warily.

“Perhaps someone should go out there,� piped up a hazel-eyed girl named Jessica. “I’ve never seen Snape get so angry that he went speechless. This is uncharted territory, lads.�

“Harry should do it,� called Racquel from the other side of the room. She was a pretty Hispanic girl from Gryffindor, who normally kept to herself. “He’s faced a lot worse than Snape.� She turned to him, smiling coyly. “There’s nothing Harry can’t do!�

“Did you see Snape’s hair?� said another brunette. “It was bushier than Granger’s!�

“Oh, be quiet, Chloe!� Hermione snapped. She was still quite livid about being the victim of Ron’s prank. She stood up in her button-up white blouse and knee-length grey skirt, the only one in the room not in robes. They were folded neatly atop her desk, still blazing with the words “Ron Weasley has the cutest bum in school!"

“Luna can take care of herself,� Hermione said coolly as she rose from her seat. “It’s Ron you should all be worrying about!�

Suddenly, she whipped out her wand out at lightening speed, scaring Ron so bad that he fell backwards in his chair. Hermione stomped furiously over to his desk as he clambered under it, holding a textbook over his head.

“Don’t let her get me,� Ron yelled from beneath the table. “Stop her, Harry! Use force if necessary!�

Harry smirked and lifted Ron’s cauldron off the table and handed it down to him. Ron immediately put it over his head like a rudimentary helmet.

Hermione leaned down and reached under the table grabbing hold of Ron’s left ankle.

“Come out of there and get your due!� Hermione cried, pulling him by the leg.

Ron wrapped his arms around Harry’s knobbly knees, whimpering from inside his cauldron-helmet.

Hermione gave a final jerk, and flew backwards into a girl named Naomi. She looked down to see Ron’s left sneaker in her hands. She threw it at him angrily, hitting him in the back of the thigh.

“Fine!� she shouted, hands on her hips. “I’ll have to take you out from under that desk by force!�

“What do you call ripping off my shoe?� He yelled angrily from under the table.

“Accio Ron!�

With an unseen force, Ron was torn out from under his desk and tossed backwards into Hermione, causing them both to crash to the floor. She gasped, realizing he was lying on top of her. Struggling to get from beneath him, she scrambled to her feet and grabbed him by the shoulders.

“Your bum won’t be very cute by the time I’m done with it!� She gave him a light kick to the rear, causing him to jump.

“Why didn’t you talk me out of it, Harry?� Ron begged, crawling towards him. “Why’d you let me… it was suicide!� He yelped again as Hermione gave him another swift kick. Many of the girls in the class were giggling wildly.

Suddenly, Ron turned around on his hands and knees to face her, pointing his wand shakily. “Don’t make me duel you… I’ll duel a girl if I have to!�

Before Hermione could reply, Neville grabbed her by the arm and yanked her back into her seat.

“I hear footsteps!� he hissed, glancing nervously towards the door. Everyone began shuffling around, straightening out their desktops and holding their laughter in with their breath. When Snape shoved the classroom door open, Ron was crawling back under his desk. Harry pretended to look down into his cauldron, trying not to acknowledge the shoeless foot sticking out from under the table. A freckled ankle peeked from a dark red sock.

“Mister Weasley,� Snape hissed, trying to remain calm. “Why are you on the floor?�

“Dropped something, ma’am. Sir! I mean sir!�

The sounds of snorting and chuckling filled the room again, but no one dared look at Snape. The image of his unruly poof of hair and bubble-bogies was too much to ignore.

Suddenly, Luna poked her head into the classroom again.

“So… just to be clear,� she began thoughtfully, scratching her head with her wand.

“Out!� Snape bellowed, causing Luna to disappear from sight. He turned to face the students once again, regaining his composure.

“Class is dismissed,� he said bitterly before leaving the room again. The students all hesitated before getting up out of their seats.

“Herbology with the Hufflepuffs next,� Neville sighed. It was his favorite subject; at least he had that to look forward to. Plus, he had a secret crush on one of the Hufflepuff girls.

“Stay next to me in Herbology, will you, Hermione?� Neville asked with a shaky voice.

“I always do!� she said warmly, helping him pick up his books.

Ron and Harry waited by the door, watching Hermione cautiously. She wouldn’t look at either of them.

“She’s mad at you again,� Harry said dully. “What’ll you do now?�

“Well… last time I wrote her that note in History that said she’s pretty. That worked good enough, didn’t it? Suppose I can just tell her she’s pretty again?�

Harry shook his head, smirking to himself. “Sure, Ron,� he laughed. “Give it a go.�

Ron’s eyes widened as Hermione and Neville walked past them towards the Potions door.

“You’re very pretty!� Ron blurted out, grimacing. Hermione stopped in her tracks.

Several girls turned around, including a gorgeous mixed brunette named Lily, to see who he was talking to. They groaned when they realized he was speaking to Hermione. She glared at him for a moment before turning and walking out of the classroom with Neville walking right behind her.

“What’re you thinking?� Neville mouthed to Ron just before chasing Hermione out the door. Ron turned to glare at Harry, who was trying not to laugh.

“Good effort,� Harry snorted. Ron shook his head and stalked out of the classroom, leaving Harry to follow behind him.
•


As Neville and Hermione walked into the hallway, they heard someone calling their names. They turned to see Lily waving her arm frantically in the air as she walked toward him. They could tell it was Lily because she always had on this thick, gold charm bracelet that complimented her warm skin tone.

“Hermione, could we chat a minute?� Lily said plainly, pulling out a small box of bubblegum.

“Oh, could I have piece?� Neville asked. He was horribly nervous about Herbology, and if he was going to talk to his crush today, he could at least have decent breath.

Lily handed him a stick of gum without looking at him and continued on.

“Hermione, you know… the girls have all been nearly certain that you and Ron were an item. But you had quite a tiff in Potions just now. I was wondering if the two of you are over. Inquiring minds want to know!�

Hermione huffed, looking completely aghast. “An item? There’s nothing between Ronald and I!� Blushing furiously, she turned on her heel and stormed away with Neville on her heels. Lily continued to smack her gum, somewhat puzzled.

“So you won’t mind if I have a go, then?�
•

As they walked to the Herbology greenhouses, Neville kept an eye out for his secret crush. Hermione had been ranting ever since they left Lily outside the Potions room. For ten minutes at least, she’d been going on about Ron’s immaturity and nerve, and about the ridiculousness of Lily’s questions. Neville had been listening to it in silence all the way out on the grounds. Suddenly, a short blonde with glasses ran past them.

“Hello, there, Neville!� She called brightly as she ran to catch up with her friends.

Neville hunched over a little, trying not to look up. Sophie ran across the grass towards a group of Hufflepuff girls, one of which was Kate. Sweet, lovely Kate! Suddenly, Neville realized he was hugging his textbooks to his chest like a teddy.

Hermione lost track of her thoughts when she saw this, and gave Neville a pat on the back.

“Why don’t you talk to her?� Hermione said gently, dragging her fingers along the greenhouse walls.

Neville whimpered. “What would I say? I’d probably just wet my trousers. Look at her… eyes as green as malachite, her soft brown hair…�

Hermione laughed appreciatively as she pushed the door to the classroom open. “I wish all boys were as sweet as you!�

They stepped carefully down the curved cobblestone path toward their tables and the two of them sat down. Hermione had to brush a wayward stalk of Asphodel out of her hair before carefully taking out all of her notes. She often disliked this class because it could be nearly as dangerous as Care of Magical Creatures, and twice as dirty. Neville, however, was right at home. He took a deep breath in, slowly calming himself. Then, Kate slid into the seat in front of him, just as Professor Sprout began to lecture. Neville realized he was still hugging his books and placed them carefully on the desktop. Then, desperately trying not to draw attention to himself, he pulled a bit of parchment out of his book-bag and began to scribble on it. A few moments later, he passed the note to Hermione. It read:

Could you give me a hint, a clue? Something I could say to her that won’t make her vomit or slap me?

Hermione read it quickly and scribbled back:

What makes you think she’ll do that?

No offense, but girls tend to be easily offended…

Hermione read this, raising her eyebrow at him in warning. Then she started to write again.

Just think about what you have in common, and start from there!

Neville thought for a moment before writing back. He was very lucky Professor Sprout hadn’t noticed their note-passing.

I know she hates Malfoy as much as… well, everyone. I wish she had been there when I called him a scumbag arse-face. D’you think if I do it again while Kate’s watching, she’ll like me?

Hermione chuckled to herself as she scribbled a response.

Everyone in the school heard about that. Besides, you’re over-thinking it. You both like Herbology, why don’t you ask if she’d study with you?

Hermione slid the note back to Neville, who read it with great relief. This seemed like a good and simple plan. He looked over at Hermione with a grin to see that she was nodding her head towards Kate, who was seated in front of Neville.

“Oh, right,� he whispered. He tore off another piece of parchment and wrote the words:

Kate- I’m a little behind on my notes, would you mind meeting me later to study? It’s okay if you don’t want to, I’ll understand. I was just wondering… No pressure or anything… -Neville

He folded it up quietly and then leaned forward, tossing it lightly over Kate’s shoulder. It landed next to her textbook. Neville watched in gut-wrenching suspense as she opened it up, read it, and then began to scribble in it. It seemed like time had frozen still. A moment later, she deftly reached her hand back and placed the note on his desk in one quick motion.

Sure, come stop by my table tonight at dinner! —Kate

Neville beamed with a toothy grin, showing the note to Hermione, who gave him a thumbs-up. Suddenly, they heard the unmistakable sound of Professor Sprout tapping her wand on her podium. Hermione and Neville jerked their heads up immediately, trying to look innocent. With a relieved sigh, they realized Professor Sprout was not looking at them, but girl named Tavia who seemed to be sleeping.

“There is no sleeping during my class!� Professor Sprout said sharply, standing above Tavia. The girl had dark, curly hair hanging over her face, her chin was resting gently on her propped up hand. Apparently her eyes were open, because Professor Sprout began waving her hands before the girl’s face.

“Up, up, up! Where is your head at, dear?�

Hermione smiled and leaned over to Neville. “I think Tavia’s got one of those Daydream charms from Fred and George’s shop. Guaranteed half-hour of uninterrupted daydreaming!�

“Ever try one?� Neville asked curiously.

“Goodness, no,� Hermione laughed. “With my class-load? I haven’t the time.�
•

In the Hospital Wing, Madame Pomfrey had painstakingly collected all the Sapsucker root she’d dropped on the floor and mixed it into her cauldron. She was still quite annoyed at Malfoy for drinking a potion not meant to be drunk, but she couldn’t be too mad at him. The pointy-nosed Slytherin was heaving in a bucket. It was difficult, however, considering his treatment. When Hermione, Harry, Ron and Neville had their faces blasted green, they simply had to cover their faces and hair with this potion. Malfoy and his two comrades, however, had drank something that turned their entire bodies cherry red, from the tips of their hair to the heels of their feet.

Three small porcelain tubs sat alongside each other, each containing a red-faced Slytherin. Madame Pomfrey lugged the cauldron over and tipped it into each bathtub, causing them all in turn to wrinkle their noses at the hideous stuff. Crabbe merely grunted in dissatisfaction, but Malfoy was incensed.

“This is torture!� He said with outrage, wrapping his pale arms around his bare legs. “Surely there must be some other way!�

“I’m afraid not, my boy,� Madame Pomfrey said with a sigh, tilting the cauldron over Malfoy’s tub. It quickly filled with the paste-like concoction.

“No visitors all day, not one! I won’t sit in this muck all day, with nobody but these two apes!� he said firmly, crossing his arms. “This potion looks and smells exactly like glue.�

“Uh, um…� Goyle said hesitantly, “Then why’d you drink it?�

Malfoy was about to retort when his face twisted up in horror. If he wasn’t so red, he might’ve looked green. He leaned over the edge of the tub and caught the bucket just in time.

A few moments later, Malfoy sat back up, glaring at his comrade.

“Alright you worthless dimwit, you think you’re so funny?� Malfoy said venomously, his beady eyes glistening. “Truth or Dare?�

The afternoon sun shined lightly through the tall windowpanes of the Hospital Wing, illuminating three tomato-red Slytherins. They sat grumpily, and quite bare, in their individual porcelain tubs filled with a paste-like potion. They were red from head to toe, even Malfoy’s trademark blonde hair was crimson. Malfoy and Goyle had been bickering just before Malfoy stopped to vomit in a bin next to his tub. A few moments later, he sat back up, glaring at his comrade.

“Alright you worthless dimwit, you think you’re funny?� Malfoy said venomously, his silver eyes glistening. “Truth or dare?�

Goyle furrowed his brows. “Truth, I s’pose.�

Malfoy gritted his teeth, lowering his voice so Madame Pomfrey wouldn’t hear. “You’re supposed to say ‘dare’, idiot, only silly girls pick ‘Truth’!�

“Dare, dare!� Goyle stuttered, desperate not to be thought of as a silly girl.

With a smile, Malfoy leaned back in his tub until his shoulders dipped down into the potion and disappeared.
“Goyle, have you ever performed the Imperius Curse?�

Goyle’s mouth hung open blankly as though a response would come to him. He was saved, however, by a scattered round of knocking on the heavy wooden door. When Madame Pomfrey opened it, a swarm of Slytherin girls came running in. Much to the dismay of Crabbe and Goyle, all the girls crowded round Malfoy’s tub. The two outcasts pouted sullenly. The only time they were surrounded by Slytherin girls was when they were standing with Malfoy.

“Oh ladies, don’t,� Malfoy feigned dramatically. “I can’t bear you all seeing me this way…�

“Are you naked in there, Draco?� asked Megan, tucking her long brown hair behind her ear. “Would you like us to leave?�

“Sod that,� Maddie exclaimed, inching closer to Malfoy’s intricate porcelain tub. Her eyes were dark green, the same as their House color. “What is this hideousness?� she continued, pinching her nose. “Are they trying to drown you in Muggle paste?�

Madame Pomfrey scurried over, waving her hands about. “Young ladies shouldn’t be in here, these boys are still recovering!�

“Oh, just a few visitors?� Malfoy asked with a charming smile. “I’ve been cooped up all alone, all day…�

Madame Pomfrey put her hands on her hips and sighed. “I suppose, with all you’ve been through, you could have a moment with your friends. I’ll be just down the hall, so do behave and I’ll be back shortly!� With that, she slipped out the door of the Hospital Wing and shut it behind her.

“Finally,� Malfoy drawled, “I thought she would never leave. The boys and I were just starting a bout of ‘Truth or Dare’, if you girls are interested.� He was answered by a round of squeals.

“I’ll start,� Giselle said wickedly, her blue-green eyes flickering. “I dare you to come out of that tub!� The other girls squealed, but Malfoy shook his head with a taunting grin.

“As much as I know you ladies would love to have a look at my bits and pieces, it won’t be while I’m blazing red and covered in glue!�

“I’ll take that as a postponement, not a refusal!� Giselle said smartly, winking at him.

“Actually,� Malfoy said coolly, looking over at Goyle, “I was just in the middle of giving Goyle here a dare!�

Goyle sat up a little, his mouth still hanging open.

“I dare you to cast Imperio on one of the Gryffindors… tomorrow morning at breakfast!�

The girls gasped, while Goyle simply furrowed his brow and managed to look even more dumbfounded.

“That’s an Unforgivable!� Megan hissed, always the voice of reason.

“Thanks, genius,� Giselle replied coolly. “It’s bloody brilliant, if you can get away with it.�

Goyle shrugged and nodded hesitantly before scooping up some more potion and rubbing it over his left shoulder.

“Your turn,� Malfoy reminded him icily.

“Right, right,� Goyle stuttered, looking blankly at the faces of the Slytherin girls in front of him.

“Oi, Crabbe, truth or dare?�

Crabbe raised an eyebrow as though he’d just been asked to define the Pythagorean theorem. His face went blank.

“You can think on it, then,� Goyle said politely. “Uh… Maddie, truth or dare?�

Maddie looked around, her hunter-green eyes scanning the faces around her. No one seemed to care that Malfoy looked like a skinny lobster.

“Giselle, truth or dare?�

“We’re Slytherins. Dare, of course!�

“Alright, you sassy witch!� Maddie said with a grin. “I dare you to sneak a Jarvey into Professor Binns’ history class!�

Malfoy flinched for a moment. Jarveys resembled ferrets, and Draco did not want to be reminded of ferrets.

Giselle folded her arms. “You call that a dare?�

“You’ll never pull it off; it’ll chew through your book-bag before you even get it into the castle!�

Giselle cocked her eyebrow wickedly. “We’ll see about that!�

“Alright, ladies, get on now," Draco warned flirtatiously. "But remember… we should be back to our normal colouring by tomorrow morning, and Goyle has a dare to fulfill…�

Goyle looked down fretfully into his tub of paste as the girls left the Hospital Wing.

“I’ve got it,� Crabbe said suddenly, looking quite hopeful. “I pick ‘Truth’!�

“Why are you so stupid?� Malfoy snapped at him.

Crabbe hesitated, thinking it over with a pained expression. “I shouldn’t have picked ‘Truth’,� he moaned.
•

They still had fifteen or so minutes until dinner, and Ron was using what little time he had trying to figure out how to apologize to Hermione.

“I hate when she’s mad at me,� Ron groaned, throwing himself dramatically across his bed. He pulled his pillow over his face. “I don’t think anyone gets as mad as she does!�

“It’s just you,� Harry said with a laugh. “You’re the only one who gets her this angry!�

“Why me? You fellows think I’m alright; what’s her problem?�

“The problem is she’s not one of the fellows, Ron. Also, it certainly didn’t help that you had someone write a testament to your bum on the back of her robes!�

Ron kicked his trunk angrily, but stubbed his toe in the process. He sat down on the edge of his bed, pouting while he rubbed his foot.

He held out his hand and began counting off on his fingers. “I sang to her in front of the entire school, I told her she was pretty, twice, and-�

“Do you see a pattern here?� Harry interrupted. “All that stuff you did because of a dare. Maybe you ought to do something nice for her without any… prompting, you know?�

Ron stood up, buttoning his robes over his t-shirt and jeans. “Harry, you’re right. This is why you’re my best mate. I’m going to be the most devilishly romantic, charming, suave, doting-�

Thud. Ron lifted his face off the floor as he realised he'd just tripped over his trunk again.

“Good luck, Don Juan!� Harry laughed, pulling Ron off the floor.

As they descended the stairs down into the Gryffindor common-room, Ron saw Hermione standing by the fireplace talking to a girl named Kathy with cropped blonde hair. Somehow, he had to get Kathy away from her so they could be alone.

“Harry, call over that Kathy girl will you? You know.. so I can talk to Hermione!�

Harry scrunched up his face, pushing his glasses back up the bridge of his nose. “What’ll I say to her?�

“I dunno,� Ron shrugged, “ask her where she got her shoes, something girly like that. Just hurry up, will you?�

Harry hesitantly waved Kathy over, who excused herself from Hermione. She was standing alone by the fireplace, staring into it, when Ron swooped in.

“Can I carry your books to the Great Hall?�

Hermione frowned. “I’m still mad with you, Ronald. Besides, I’m not bringing my books tonight!�

“But you always bring your books to meals; It’s what you do!�

“Well, I’ve finished my work for tonight!

"You're never finished working! You're already doing homework for classes you haven't even had yet!"

"Ron, what are you on about? I don't have any books with me at the moment, now stop pestering me!�

He hesitated, running a hand through his shaggy red hair. “Got anything else I can carry?�

Hermione grabbed a dusty book off the mantle and shoved it at Ron, who barely caught it.

“There, happy?�

Hermione began to storm away, but Ron dropped the dusty book on the floor and grabbed her by the arm, pulling her back to him. In one swift motion, he tossed her over his shoulder and started to walk towards the Portrait.

“Ronald Weasley, put me down this instant!� she screamed, kicking her legs.

“I’m going to make it up to you, Hermione, whether you like it or not! And if I have to carry you to every meal and every class for the rest of the term, that’s what I’ll do!�

As Ron walked out the portrait with Hermione thrashing over his shoulder, Harry cracked up laughing. That is, until Hermione caught his eye and glared at him. Harry immediately doffed his glasses and began shining them diligently on his sleeve.

As Ron stepped carefully out of the Gryffindor Portrait with Hermione slung over his right shoulder, she screamed and growled furiously. Her wavy brown hair was hanging over her face and she was extremely worried that passers-by might get a glance up her skirt. As she tried to reach back and hold it down, Harry and Neville jumped out after them, laughing riotously.

“Set me down!� Hermione screamed, glaring at Harry and Neville through her mussed curls of hair.

“Ron’s earning your forgiveness,� Harry called after her. “I really shouldn’t interfere!�

Students stopped and stared throughout the hallway has Ron passed them, his smile reaching ear to ear. Hermione had given up and was now hanging limply over his shoulder, glad that her messy mane of hair covered her blushing face.

“You’re a real animal, Weasley!� called Victoria, a cute Hufflepuff with cropped brown hair. When Neville caught sight of her, he ran up and pulled her aside.

Suddenly Hermione’s eyes flashed and she began squirming again, trying to fish her wand from her pocket.

“Oi! Stop moving about, will you?� Ron shouted, tightening his grip around her legs. “I nearly dropped you on your head!�

Finally Hermione withdrew her wand with a smile. Being slung over Ron’s shoulder had one advantage; she had a perfect view of his arse. She pointed her wand, grinning devilishly.

"Incendio!"

Ron yelped as a burst of flame erupted from the back of his trousers, causing Hermione to slide backwards off his shoulder. She hit the floor laughing, however, as Ron was stomping about in a small circle trying to pat down his rear. A small crowd gathered, laughing and coughing as smoke filled the hallway.

Hermione stood up and grabbed Stephanie Begg by the shoulder, one of the female Quidditch players. She had shaggy brown hair and was quite the tomboy. Hermione spoke hurriedly into her ear and Stephanie stepped forward with a grin.

“I’ll help you,� Stephanie said encouragingly, pointing her wand at Ron’s blackened pants.

“Aguamenti!"

Ron screamed with an unusually high pitch as her wand sprayed a blast of cold water all over his trousers.

“Begg, not you too!�

“Er… See you at practice!� she called out, trying not to laugh as she ran off down the hall.

Hermione sauntered up to Ron, who was dripping with water and reaching back to cover his back end.

Ron was livid. “I can’t sweep you off your feet if you’re setting fire to my bum!� He reached down and began wringing out his pockets.

As they continued to argue, Neville had pulled Victoria aside to talk.

“It’s almost dinner,� Neville muttered nervously, “…and I’m going to meet Kate to borrow her notes… I was wondering if, uh…�

“Are you worried you won’t know what to talk about?� Victoria asked, tilting her head. Neville nodded.

“Don’t worry, Longbottom. She already thinks you’re a decent fellow. Don’t give yourself an ulcer!�
•

By the time they reached the Great Hall, Hermione had already performed a mending charm on Ron’s pants, which he was still quite sullen about. Ginny was already there when they took their seats, in deep conversation with Luna Lovegood.

Harry took his spot next to Ginny at the table, cringing a little. Luna had a pad and pen out, which reminded him of the irritable Rita Skeeter. Around her wrist was a charm bracelet with no charms, but a dozen bobby-pins dangling from the chain. Luna looked quite perplexed.

"Maybe you can help her out," Ginny said as she turned to Harry. "Luna wants some suggestions on clever Truths and Dares for the game tonight."

Harry scratched his head, knocking his glasses slightly askew. Oddly, Luna was wearing only one of her bumblebee earrings.

"What happened to your, erm… other earring?" Harry said delicately, gesturing toward Luna's left ear.

"Flew off," she said glumly. Meanwhile, the bumblebee hanging from her right ear was buzzing in tiny, fervent circles.

"Well, to answer your question, a dare is something you'd never willingly do…"

Luna took out a Sugar Quill and began scribbling, her tongue sticking out the side of her mouth.

"…and a truth," Harry continued, "is a question you'd never willingly answer."

Luna finished scribbling and stood up. "Later, then. I've got lots of brainstorming to do." She tucked her notepad into her robes pocket and stuck her Sugar Quill in her mouth.

"Blueberry," she said thoughtfully as she turned and walked away.

Meanwhile, Ron and Hermione were being notably quiet. Ginny, who was about to put a forkful of peas in her mouth, looked up at them with suspicious eyes. Hermione was blushing a deep shade of pink, looking penetratingly into her roasted ham.

“Would you like to try my Cauldron Cake, Hermione?� Ron said casually, holding a forkful of the delicious dessert up to her face.

“What, are you feeding her now?!� Ginny exclaimed, still holding her own fork in the air.

Ron ignored his sister, tilting his head to catch Hermione’s eyes. She seemed very interested in her dinner plate.

“No thank you, Ronald,� Hermione mumbled. Her face reddened even more and she let her hair fall into her face. Ron shrugged his shoulders and stuffed the bit of cake in his mouth.

Harry and Neville stared at the two with utter puzzlement, while Ginny tore off a bit of her own piece of Cauldron Cake.

“Here you are, Harry,� Ginny said airily as she held the piece of cake in the air. “Let’s have a bite!� Harry turned to face her, and with one quick motion, dropped a handful of peas down her shirt. She squealed madly and began trying to shove the bit of cake in Harry’s mouth. Ron ignored them further and began fumbling through his robes pocket.

Over at the Ravenclaw table, a 5th year named Starla elbowed her boyfriend sharply in the ribs. He turned to see the odd sight of Harry Potter with his hand down Ginny Weasley’s collar.

“You never feed me cake, Brian, or anything romantic like that!� Starla whined. Brian ran a hand through his shaggy brown hair and began picking at his plate.

“D’you like ham, sweetie?� Brian stuttered, trying to keep a straight smile. Starla nodded. Brian held up a bit of ham on his fork and she leaned over dramatically to take a bite. Meanwhile, a girl named Alex was crossing her eyes and making gagging sounds.

“You’re just mad you haven’t got a boyfriend, freckle-face!� Starla hissed.

Luna picked up her mug of pumpkin juice and raised it up to shoulder level. Her charm bracelet, which was decorated with assorted bobby-pins, tinkled against the glass.

“Would you care for a sip, Frankie?� Luna said softly, seemingly to the left pocket of her robes. She tilted the glass a little so that whatever was in her pocket could have a better look. No one dared to comment.
•

“Oh, I almost forgot,� Ron said nonchalantly as he pulled his closed fist out of his pocket. Hermione looked up curiously, trying not to appear too interested. Ron opened his hand to reveal his S.P.E.W button. Hermione’s jaw dropped as he pinned it to the front of his robes and began eating his dinner again, as though nothing unusual had occurred.

“You still have that?� Hermione gasped. Ron nodded.

“You know, I’ve taken up knitting,� Ron added casually. “For the house-elves, you know.�

“It’s true,� Harry added with a smirk. “He stayed up all last night trying to finish that sock.�

“That was a scarf!� Ron snapped, crossing his arms.

“If word gets out that you’ve started a knitting circle, you’ll have to transfer schools!�

Hermione pursed her lips, her brown eyes widening. “Ron, what are you on about? You don’t care about S.P.E.W!�

Ron tilted his head back as though he was deep in thought and wrapped his arm around Hermione’s shoulder.

“You know, 'Mione, I care about what you care about.� At this point, Ron was stroking his chin with his free hand.

“Because,� Ron continued, “I am just the sort of fellow who deserves your forgiveness and admiration!�

“Don Ron DeMarco,� Harry chuckled to himself.

Hermione stood up, her fists clenched. “It’s all a joke to you, isn’t it?� she hissed, picking up her book-bag. “I’m going to the dormitory. Goodnight!� She turned on her heel, but Ron leapt from his seat and grabbed her book-bag out of her hands.

“Let me carry that for you!� He announced a little too loudly, swinging the bag over his shoulder.

“Give it back!� Hermione tried to rip the bag off him, becoming ever more conscious of the stares they were getting.

“Just like my parents,� a girl named Nina mumbled into her mug.

Just then, amidst their tug of war, the bag split open. Giant books with yellowed pages landed with a resounding thud; notebooks slapped against the floor sending bits of parchment sprawling all around their feet.

“Now look what you’ve done!� Hermione spat. Nearly the entire Great Hall was staring at the two.

Ron looked confounded for a moment while Hermione ducked behind the Gryffindor table and started scrambling to pick up her things.

“Nothing to see here,� Ron announced to his fellow students with a wave of his hand. “I dropped some books, is all. It certainly wasn’t Hermione! She’s far too clever, and coordinated and such… and a magnificent dancer!�

Suddenly, Hermione reached her hand up and yanked Ron down to the floor.

“Shut up!�

Hermione stormed off immediately, her arms full of books and papers. Ron snatched up a notebook she’d missed and chased after her. As soon as the door to the Great Hall closed behind them, everyone burst into unabashed laughter.
•

Hermione ran as fast as she could down the halls, her arms wrapped tightly around her textbooks. Bits of notes were falling out of her grip left and right, but she kept going. As she glanced back, she saw Ron sprinting down the hallway after her, snatching up her dropped papers.

“I’m considerate! Sensitive!� He shouted, stuffing the papers under his arm. “I’m bloody charming! Isn’t this what you wanted?�

Hermione ran all the way to the Gryffindor tower, dashing madly towards the portrait.

“Hunkydory!� She screeched, running at the portrait like a speeding train.

“Correct!� The Fat Lady shouted, diving frantically out of frame. The portrait slid open; Hermione was almost free. Suddenly, however, she felt arms wrap around her as she slammed to the floor.

“Ronald Weasley, did you just tackle me?� she gasped, staring up at him furiously. Ron jumped to his feet and held his hand out to help her up. She hesitated a moment before taking his hand.

“That wasn’t a tackle, really,� he pleaded, pulling her to her feet. “It was, erm, an overanxious embrace!� He began dusting off her robes, but she smacked his hands away.

Hermione sighed, shaking her head. “If I forgive you, will you leave me alone?�

Ron frowned, his brow furrowed. “But you would’t really mean it!� Suddenly, he held out his wand.

“Orchideous!�

As a myriad of different types of flowers sprouted from the tip of his wand, he dropped to his knees among the growing pile of daisies, tulips, hibiscus, and more.

“Hermione Granger, will you go to Hogsmeade with me this weekend?�

“Oh, we go together every weekend!� She exclaimed, blushing profusely.

“Just you and I!� He stuttered, giving his wand a shake. Eventually the pour of flowers ceased. “It’ll be special. Like… like a…�

“A date?� She finished, biting her lip.

Ron smiled, his ears turning bright red.
•

Meanwhile, in the Great Hall, students were still finishing the last meal of the day. Harry turned to Neville, nudging his arm.

“Five Sickles says he’s gone and asked her on a date.�

“Who?� Neville stammered. His mind leapt with ideas of some other, more charming lad putting the moves on sweet Kate.

“Ron. And Hermione.�

Neville’s face began to regain its colouring. “Oh, right… a date? Cheers, then!�

Harry turned to face Ginny, giving her a smile. "You joining us again for Truth or Dare tonight?" He asked quietly. "Everyone's coming..."

Ginny mashed her helpless peas violently into her potatoes with a fork. “When are you taking me on a date, Harry?�

“What?� He said, fixing his glasses on his face. “Erm, this weekend! Hogsmeade! I meant to ask you…�

“Alright,� she said coolly, twirling her fork in her fingers.

A moment later, Neville stood up suddenly from his seat. He somehow had a look of resolute determination and simpering fear in his face.

“Finally going to talk to Kate, then?� Ginny asked.

“Who’s Kate?� Harry said, nearly dropping his mug.

“Neville practically worships her. He’s supposed to be meeting her at the Hufflepuff table to borrow her notes.�

Neville’s face went utterly pale. “D-did Hermione t-tell you?�

Ginny waved her hand. “You’re running out of time! Now go ask her out, or I’ll hex you!� She began to pick peas off her plate and tossed them at Neville, who blocked his face with his hands.

“I’m going! I’m going!�

Neville jogged off toward the Hufflepuff table, while Ginny continued to pelt him with her remaining peas.

“Did I mention I hate peas?� she said aloud, flicking one just over Neville’s shoulder.
•

At the Slytherin table, Goyle was furrowing his unusually Neanderthalic brow in thought.

“Don’t hurt yourself,� Draco sneered.

“I can’t do it,� Goyle said sullenly as he stared at his plate. “I can’t cast an Unforgivable in the Great Hall, right in front of the whole school… even if it is a dare!�

Draco leaned his head back, growling. Suddenly, a ravishing girl with straight black hair leaned forward.

“There are alternatives, you know,� she said with a smirk.

“Educate me, Ashleigh,� Malfoy said airily, leaning forward. “And it had better be interesting…�