Andromeda Tonks fought against drowsiness, feeling her eyes closing slowly. She forced them open and, though her vision was blurry, stared at the nearly extinguished fire in front of her. She had lighted up some logs an hour ago to warm up the room when she had come back from upstairs, and now the temperature was just as comfortable as you could wish for.

A bothersome weather had taken over the country recently, bringing an awful lot of rain almost every day, and humidity was infiltrating every corner of the house.

Andromeda loathed humidity. She could feel it constantly on her skin, making her clothes stick to her body whenever she was moving. Even her nights were disturbed; it would wake her up in panic, her nightgown and the bed sheets completely soaked with sweat. Not that her sleep was particularly peaceful lately, but it was just adding up to everything else that wasn’t going according to plan in her life. So, knowing that she had no other choice, she had resolved to keep the fireplace alive to get rid of the damn humidity even if the end of May was near.

She rubbed a tired hand over her even more tired eyes and rested her head against the headrest of the couch. Exhaustion made her whole body numb, leaving her with just one desire: to crawl into her bed and never leave it.

She listened for a moment, searching for a suspicious sound, but found only silence. A deep and soothing silence like Andromeda wasn’t accustomed to anymore. Maybe she could just take the opportunity to close her eyes... Her eyelids were so heavy. Just for a minute or two, she thought. No one will notice... She resisted a little bit more, for form’s sake, before letting herself fall into nothingness.

After what only seemed like a few minutes, a loud howl shattered the silence, and Andromeda jumped out of her nap, one hand tightly gripping a cushion by her side. Her eyes were now wide open. Seems like he noticed... She sat up reluctantly and readjusted her shawl that had fallen from her frail shoulders during her sleep, her heart still pounding in her chest from the sudden waking. The cries continued to echo from upstairs, as if they wanted to remind her that she had better things to do than to take the time to rest. Andromeda got up at once and winced as she felt a sharp pain in the small of her back.

“I’m getting too old for this,� she muttered, rubbing her sore back with both hands. She dragged herself out of the living room and went towards the stairs. Following the tracks of the ear-splitting complaints, she reached a small room plunged into the dark at the end of the hall. Andromeda stopped in the doorway to put a hand on her mouth, repressing a yawn, and pulled her wand out of the pocket of her pale blue nightgown. She waved it swiftly, and gladly welcomed the warm light of the glowing candles that were set all around the room.

A sudden memory flashed through her mind at that moment. A memory that surprised her by its intensity and its rapidity to appear, even after months of trying to avoid any thoughts of him. The sight of her husband came to her, as she remembered that he used to prefer complete darkness when he had to get up in the middle of the night to comfort their daughter. “Don’t forget to avoid the wall’s corner,� she would tell him with a sleepy voice; each time, she would hear his muffled grumble as his big toe hit the wall anyway, and simply smiled before returning to Morpheus’ arms.

Her face went livid as the emotions brought by this vision kicked in, quickly followed by cold shivers down her spine. Clutching her wand with a shaking hand, Andromeda put a foot behind her and turned around to leave, ignoring the persistent wailings that were calling for her. This was too much to handle. The wall she had carefully built inside herself to prevent her from falling apart dangerously swayed. Every day, it threatened to fall down; it even lost a few bricks that she patiently had to put back to their places, until she felt solid on her feet again. Those holes could not get bigger. She was too afraid that one day, the barrier would crash down and she wouldn’t be able to survive without it. It would be too painful to bear.

Andromeda bit hard on her lower lip as she felt a slight nausea come up to her throat. The pain caused by the bite seemed to make her come back to her senses and she managed to swallow. It felt like burning acid was going down her throat. She stood up in the corridor for long minutes, her eyes closed, taking spasmodic breaths and then deeper ones, until her chest finally decompressed. She slowly but surely pushed her panic back to the corner of her mind, behind the wall.

It was only when she allowed herself to reopen her eyes that Andromeda noticed the baby was still crying behind her. She turned her body to face the entrance of the bedroom for the second time, but did not go further. She knew she had to go in and take care of the little being waiting for the warmth of her arms, but somehow, she just couldn’t make up her mind to do it. Not yet.

Looking down at her hands, Andromeda noticed that she was fidgeting. She sighed to steady her nerves. “Come on, Andromeda, you can do this,� she tried to convince herself. “He needs you. Besides, you can’t let him cry forever.� She shook her head in desperation. “It’s not about you; it’s about him. His needs are greater than yours right now. He’s just a baby.�

This much was true. He was so young; this whole situation wasn’t his fault. He couldn’t know or comprehend just how hard it was for her to step into this room.

Still a little hesitant, Andromeda finally walked up to the baby’s crib and leaned over it. A furious little boy welcomed her, his face so red that he looked like he was about to explode in any minute. “Now, now, Teddy, don’t cry like this.� She cleared her wavering voice before adding, “Granny’s here.�

She took him gently in her arms and rested him against the tender spot between her shoulder and her neck. He struggled in her embrace, turning his head to all sides and still screaming furiously. Holding him with one hand, Andromeda rubbed his back with the other and noticed that his pyjamas were drenched with sweat. She thought of changing him, but finally decided not to, as he was still too agitated. It would just make him angrier. So she started to walk across the room to try to calm down her little fury ball, whispering comforting words in his ear.

After ten minutes of unsuccessful walking, Andromeda opted for a change of strategy. She grabbed a blanket in the bed and sat down on the rocking chair beside it. She wrapped Ted in the soft yellow and blue fabric, propped him in the crate of her arm and began to rock him slowly. He didn’t seem to like it either, as five minutes later heavy tears were still falling down on his little cheeks. There had been an improvement, though, Andromeda noticed, because his features had returned to their normal peach colour.

“What in Merlin’s name is making you so upset?� she asked him, examining his face anxiously. “You can’t be hungry yet – I fed you not so long ago!�

More sobs answered her question, which made her grin, more of derision than anything else. She had a pretty clear idea on what he would say to her if only he could express his anger with words. He was missing them, Remus and Nymphadora, as much as she was missing her husband and daughter.

Her hands started to shake at the thought, and Teddy let her know he didn’t appreciate the sudden trembling by crying louder. He was so young, yet Andromeda was convinced he could sense that things were wrong. That something was missing in his life – the comforting presence of his mother.

Andromeda was doing the best she could to replace Nymphadora, but deep down inside, she was afraid it would never be enough to fill out the emptiness caused by Teddy’s parents’ deaths. Clearly, taking care of him, giving him everything Andromeda had left in her of motherly instinct and devotion didn’t help her to forget that she too had lost the two most important people in her life. And that now, she was truly alone.

She closed her eyes to try to ease the panic that was mounting in her chest once more. Bad thoughts swirled through her mind and all the animosity she was feeling for the one person she considered responsible for her daughter’s death rose up once more. It was all Remus Lupin’s fault. If he hadn’t left the house to go join the battle at Hogwarts, Nymphadora would’ve stayed safely where she belonged – by her son’s side. Andromeda had put all her efforts to prevent her from rushing to her husband’s rescue, but nothing had worked. Her daughter had always been extremely stubborn, so Andromeda’s opinion hadn’t weighted much in the balance.

Remus wouldn’t have been able to control her either, a little voice in the back of her mind murmured. She fiercely shook her head. That was foolish. She needed someone to blame, and since the person in question was dead, they couldn’t say anything to defend themselves. Which was unfair, she knew, but right now, she just didn’t care.

Little Teddy took the opportunity to remind her of his presence by wiggling furiously in her arms, which made her almost drop him. By chance, her reflexes were still good; opening her eyes abruptly, she gripped him more firmly. Anger and guilt spread through her.

“Focus, Andromeda,� she muttered through gritted teeth. She cast her bitterness aside and started to search around the room, a bit desperate to find another idea that might calm her grandson. On the left was the closet, then the changing table and the small bookshelf full of children books and figurines of different magical creatures and beasts, and then the baby’s bed. Her gaze returned to the bookshelf, and she narrowed her eyes when a familiar object caught her attention. On a red book laid a comforter, something Ted had bought a long time ago when Nymphadora was just a little baby. That was exactly what she needed!

She freed her left arm to reach for her wand in her pocket and summoned the object in question. “Here,� she said softly to Teddy, putting it in his mouth. He looked surprised at first, but stopped crying at once and started sucking at it. Andromeda grinned broadly, proud of her sudden ingenious idea.

She delicately wiped tears from his cheeks with her hand and then brushed away some hair that had stuck to his sweaty forehead. Teddy looked at her in contentment for a few minutes and then, slowly, closed his eyes.

She watched his now peaceful face and after a while, she let out a little sigh, feeling appeased too. The war was over for tonight – there was a solution to everything, it seemed. So maybe, with some time and dedication, she would find one to mend her bruised heart. What good was there to be mad at an innocent man anyway? The real culprits were those who had seeked power and reigned through terror. She had seen enough of this mess to know that poor Remus had nothing to do with how things had turned out. He certainly hadn’t wished for it to happen either...

Still looking at her grandson’s face, an obvious truth came to her. If he could feel how empty their lives had become, she wished hard that he could also sense one other crucial detail: that even though his grandmother was going through a rough phase at the moment, she loved him very much. As long as there would still be life running through her veins – even just a little spark – she would do everything in her power to protect him. Andromeda Tonks had been a fighter for all of her existence; that was the feature Ted loved the most about her personality – the fact that no matter what was thrown at her, she would never put her arms down and declare defeat. This little boy needed her to keep fighting, and that was exactly what she was planning of doing. Peace of mind would come back to her eventually, slowly but surely.

Andromeda got up quietly, feeling serene, and walked up to Teddy’s cot. He moved a little, but didn’t wake up. She carefully lay him down on his back and whispered, “Sleep tight, Teddy Lupin. Granny’s not going anywhere. That’s a promise.�