I could feel the darkness closing in. It was clouding my vision from every angle, drawing further in with every second that passed. I tried to fight it, but I was too tired; I fought to keep my vision, but slowly, I began to let go, falling into the blissfully calm sea of blackness. Eventually, it immersed me completely.

“Gwen?� A voice reached deep into the darkness. “Gwen? Can you hear me?� It pulled and tugged at me, reaching down and pulling me from the darkness. I resisted, the darkness was comforting, silent and still. I didn’t want to leave. But the voice was too strong. I couldn't resist. As it dragged me back into consciousness, I slowly became aware of my surroundings. I was lying down, on fresh, crisp sheets. Noises began to enter my head once more, the sound of people talking, footfalls on a hard floor, the strange beeping of machines. I shook my head, trying to rid the fuzziness that was still coating the sounds; I felt my hair move against my ear, and a pillow beneath that. Finally, I opened my eyes.

“Gwen!� An excited voice came from my right. “Oh Gwen! You’re awake!�

“Good morning, Gwen.� Said a more controlled, but still happy voice.

I vaguely remembered that I should talk. I tried to open my mouth, but my throat was too dry, and all that came out was a hoarse croak.

“Here,� said the controlled voice. I felt a cold glass being pressed to my lips, and I drank gratefully.

Eventually, the blurriness went from my eyes, and I could take in my surroundings. The room I was lying in was long and white; it was very clean and was full of other beds, some covered by curtains and some open to my eyes. I could see people in long lime green robes walking up and down the corridor in between the beds. I was pulled out of my observations by the excited voice once more. I looked over to my right.

My mother, Georgina Reynolds was sat on a stool by my head. She looked tired, her hair was scruffy and her make-up was smudged under her eyes. She looked as though she had been crying.

“Mum?� I croaked hoarsely.

“Gwen! Gwen it’s me! I’m here. Oh, I am so happy you are all right!�

I mumbled a greeting and muttered something about water. The other person who was with me (who I now realised was a man wearing the lime green robes, and therefore must be a Healer) seemed to understand what I was asking for, and placed the glass to my lips once more. I drank gratefully, and tried my voice once more.

“Wh..where am I?� I asked, even though I was pretty sure I already knew.

“You’re in St Mungo’s darling, you collapsed two days ago.�

Suddenly, it all came rushing back.

I had been planning to go out with my boyfriend, Nick. We were going to Apparate to the Lake District, and spend a day by the lake with a picnic. To me, it sounded like the perfect day. But things went downhill quickly, they went downhill from the moment Nick arrived at my house.

There was a knock at the door, and I ran to answer it. It was Nick, just as I knew it would be. I grinned up at him and went up on tip toe to kiss him. But he moved his face away from me, causing me to fall back onto the flats of my feet. “Nick?� I asked confused, “is everything okay?� Nick simply shook his head.

“Come with me,� he said. He pulled on my arm and dragged me out of the door.

Once we were out of my hallway and onto my front garden Nick, keeping a firm grip on my arm, turned on the spot and Disapparated, taking me with him.

We landed at the lakeside, exactly where we had been planning to go. “Nick...� I smiled, thinking he was about to surprise me. Or maybe he was just messing around? “What the hell are you doing?�

“I didn’t want to do this where your neighbours could overhear.�

“Do what Nick?� By now of course, all sorts of possibilities were running through my head. What if... what if he was going to ask me to marry him? Oh my god! That must be it! Convinced that was what was about to happen, I grinned up a Nick expectantly. He looked slightly confused by my happy face, but continued anyway.

“Gwen,� he started, “I can’t do this anymore.�

My smile faltered. “Do...do what?�

“This... us.�

The smile vanished from my face. “Wh...what do you mean? I don’t understand.�

“I’m breaking up with you, Gwen. I don’t love you anymore, okay?�

I couldn't believe what I was hearing. My dreams of a happy marriage from only a minute ago were smashed into oblivion. I felt as though I had been punched in the gut. I just stood there, gasping for air, willing this to all be a dream.

“It’s over Gwen.� And with that he grabbed my arm once more and Apparated back to my house. He dropped me in my living room, clean onto the sofa. I turned, still trying to get some words together to say, but before I could open my mouth he was gone. I screamed, and burst into tears. This couldn’t be happening. Nick was my soul mate, my true love. We had been together for eight years. Yet he had ended it in less than eight minutes.


I shuddered in my hospital bed. That had been a dream, right? A delusion of being in a coma. I hurriedly turned to my mother.

“Nick.� I said urgently. “Where is Nick?�

“Nick?� My mother seemed momentarily confused. “Darling, you and Nick broke up a month ago... you haven’t seen him since.�

I burst into tears. The Healer by my side looked shocked, but my mother just sighed.

“Gwen! Gwen calm down! I thought you were over that silly boy! It’s been a whole month!�

She didn’t understand of course. She would never understand. How it feels to have a part of your heart ripped out, your soul shredded in two. You feel like you will never be whole again, never feel normal, never be able to trust, or love again. No, she would never understand.

I needed to get away from her, I tied to sit up, but as soon as I moved my head began to spin and I collapsed back onto the pillows. I was still crying, my last shred of hope torn away by my thoughtless mother. It hadn’t been a dream.

“Please, Gwen.� The Healer said calmly, “Try not to move, you’ve been really ill, you should rest.�

I didn’t feel like resting. I wanted to get out. Now. But then a thought occurred to me. “Wh...What happened to me?�

“It appears you stopped eating Gwen,� the Healer said kindly. “You collapsed in your bedroom, your mother found you and brought you to us.� Then it all came back to me.

***

For the first three weeks after the break-up I refused to move from the sofa. I had no reason to. I was in-between jobs and I had no friends to bother me. No reason to sleep, as my sleep was only plagued with the dreams of my consciousness. In some ways, the few minutes I spent sleeping were some of the worst of those weeks. Some days, I would dream of all the happy times Nick and I had shared, I was happy in those dreams, until the scenes melted before my eyes and left me cold and alone on the sofa. The other dreams were that day, again and again and again. I’m breaking up with you Gwen... I don’t love you anymore... It’s over... The words floated through my mind as I lay on the sofa, not half the person I used to be. Nick was my everything. I needed him.

I waited for three weeks, just lying there on the sofa, watching the fire, willing him to suddenly appear and beg my forgiveness. I listened intently for a knock at the door – the first few days I near flattened the post man. But I soon lost my eagerness. I soon realised that he was never coming back. Slowly, slowly my condition deteriorated

When the fourth week finally arrived, and there was still no sign of Nick, I gave up. I stopped caring. I refused to move, and I gave up on sleeping altogether. I saw no point in eating, I saw no point in even living anymore. All I remember from those last few weeks, is a swirling haze of blackness and pain.

***

My eyes flew open. I was back in the white hospital bed. I was sweating from the dream of the past I had just had. The ward was in twilight; my mother had left long ago, although I couldn't remember saying goodbye. The curtains around the other beds were all closed now, but mine weren’t. I was sick of sitting in the bed; I wanted to get up, find something to take my mind off my hideous situation. I sat up, and my head began swimming and spinning once more, but I defied the urge to lie back down. Instead I shakily shifted my body until my feet and lower legs were sticking out over the side of the bed. I tried to lower myself down onto the feet, but fell down again almost immediately. I was half sitting half standing awkwardly between my bed and the wall. This was never going to work. I sighed angrily and got back into bed, just from that small physical exertion, I was incredibly tired. I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to sleep, and I didn’t want to be awake either. I just wanted peaceful blackness, or something to take my mind off it all. To be honest, I wanted to see Nick.

I must have fallen asleep again, because the next thing I knew the ward was lit with brilliant sunlight, and the man in green robes was back. “Good morning, Gwen! How are you feeling?�

I smiled as brightly as I could, and tried to say “Really good thank you!� But all that came out was a kind of hoarse groan. I cursed my dry throat; I wanted out of here, and sounding that bad wasn’t going to help. “I... I want to go for a walk.� I croaked. “Gwen...� the Healer sighed. “You aren’t ready for any physical exercise yet.� I turned over and closed my eyes, hoping to make him go away. He took the hint; I heard the curtains close behind him. Then I started to cry.

Two weeks had passed. I felt a lot better, physically at least. Finally I felt strong enough to get up and walk, and the Healer didn’t try to stop me. The first few times I tried to walk ended with me on the floor. But slowly, as the days went by, I got stronger.

I had been in the hospital for five weeks when I saw him. I was taking one of my ever more frequent walks through the halls and floors and this time I ended up on the first floor. A large sign above my head read “Creature-Induced Injuries Ward�. I didn’t think anything in particular of this part of the hospital, it was just like any other. I began to walk down the long white corridor when, suddenly, there was a shout behind me. “YOU! Girl, get out of the way!� I jumped and whirled around. There were five or so Healers rushing down the corridor; suspended behind them was the body of a young man. His tousled blonde hair was streaked with blood and his robes were ripped and torn so that they hung in tatters off his body. I stood still, too shocked to move, until the Healer who had shouted at me before called again. I jumped and flattened myself to the wall as the mass of people came hurrying past. The floating man passed by me in just a few seconds, but it was enough for me to recognise him. It was Nick.

I froze where I was, flat against the wall, as the world appeared to stop. I couldn't believe what I had just seen. It was Nick, here in St Mungos, and he was injured. From the tone of the Healer’s voice, he was injured pretty badly. Suddenly the world around me began to move once more. I gasped for breath and began stumbling down the corridor after Nick and the group of Healers.

I found the room he was in quite easily; Healers were rushing in and out carrying various pieces of complicated equipment. I rushed to the door, and straight into a Healer coming out of the door. The collision nearly caused her to drop whatever it was she was carrying, but she seemed in too much of a rush to give me a second look. I stumbled through the open door in shock and froze at what I saw. Nick was lying on a bed in the centre of the room, his face and body were coated in blood, and he had deep gashes across his chest. I watched in vein as a Healer tried to stop the bleeding and close the wound. I had seen cuts this bad before, but never had they been so apparently hard to close. I let out a loud racking sob, and the Healers in the room looked up finally noticing me. “You can’t be in here!� called one of them. “Go away!�

I was still shaking. “He...he’s my boyfriend...�

“Well, get out of the way!� the man shouted back at me.

A kindly looking woman came over to me. “We’re doing everything we can for him. If you wait outside I’ll come and get you soon and you can see him. Okay?� She took in my hospital gown. “Are you okay?�

“Yeah...� I faltered, “yeah... I’m fine.� She nodded and ushered me out of the door.

I paced the halls, waiting desperately for any news of Nick. No one had even explained to me what had happened. I felt sick with worry.

Finally, the Healer who had been kind to me before emerged from the room. “You can see him now,� she said kindly. I rushed to the door, but she caught my arm. “We’ve done all we can for him, he’s awake but we don’t know how long he will stay with us. Just be warned, he might not make it.�

“I... I don’t understand,� I stammered. “What has hurt him so badly that you can’t fix him?�

She started to say something, but trailed off at my uncomprehending face. “Maybe you should let him tell you...� She let go of my arm and walked off down the corridor. I pushed the door open and walked inside tentatively.

Nick was lying on the bed oin the middle of the room. His wounds had stopped bleeding, but they had not been healed. I pressed my hand to his cheek, and his eyes fluttered open.

“Nick? Nick it’s me,� I said gently. Nick groaned in pain.

“Gwen?� he muttered.

“Yes, it’s me. Oh Nick, what happened.�

“It was all a lie!� He tried to sit up but collapsed back on the pillow in pain.

“No! Nick stay still, what was all a lie?�

“Me, breaking up with you. It was stupid. I love you Gwen, I always have and I always will. I was just trying to protect you.�

I was really confused now. “Protect me from what?�

Nick sighed sadly. He lifted his arm, with what looked like a lot of effort and showed me a mark on his forearm. “I got bitten.� He said bitterly. “Just before I broke up with you. My job... working for the Department for the Regulation and Control of Magical Creatures, I was working for the Werewolf register... I got my moon times wrong. I am really sorry Gwen. When I heard that you were in here, I blamed myself. The werewolf that attacked me, he was horrid Gwen, even when he turned back human, he didn’t care what he had done. It was the full moon last night... I went after him. I thought you were gonna die Gwen! I went out to kill him... only he was stronger than I thought...�

All this talking was too much for Nick. He began to cough and he winced and groaned in pain as his body convulsed. Nick began writhing on the bed, and suddenly I could hear a loud beeping sound, which was reverberating around the room, assaulting my ears. The door burst open and half a dozen Healers rushed in, all shouting different things at and around each other. Two of the six began casting spells on Nick, sparks flashing over him and sinking into his chest and wounds.

“Nick!� I called desperately above the Healers voices, “Nick! Can you hear me?� His head angled slightly towards me, his eyes rolling back in his sockets. “Nick!� I was really scared now. I grabbed his hand and squeezed it tightly. “Nick, I love you! Please, don’t leave me!� I began to cry as Nick’s convulsions became more and more violent. The Healers tried desperately to save him, but eventually he lay still.

“Nick!� I screamed; this couldn’t be happening. “Nick!� but still he didn’t move. The Healers stopped casting spells; there was nothing more they could do for him. The strain of the werewolf fight had been too much on his body. I grabbed the sleeve of the nearest Healer. “DONT STOP!� I screamed at her, “YOU HAVE TO KEEP GOING! DON’T GIVE UP ON HIM!�

The Healers sighed and shook her head sadly. She gently pulled my hand from her sleeve. I sat there, dumbstruck. “I’m really sorry, he’s gone.�

The Healers left the room one by one, all patting my arm or smiling apologetically as they passed me, but none of them tried to persuade me to leave. They knew I wouldn’t.

I blamed myself. If I hadn’t been so stupid after the breakup, he would never have gone to fight that werewolf. And now he wouldn’t be... I struggled to bring myself to think it. Dead.

But I knew really that this wasn’t entirely my fault. If only he had told me, just told me instead of breaking up with me. Secrets were what had torn our lives apart.
The secrets of St Mungo’s. In a way I am glad I was there, glad I took that route for my walk that particular day. Those words will stay with me forever. �I love you Gwen, I always have and I always will.� I loved him too. I am just happy that we had the chance to tell each other.

I will never forget him. Ever.