I killed them. I didn’t mean to. I didn’t want any of them to die. But it’s my fault. I’ll be the first to admit that it was all my fault.

I admit that I killed them.

*

“My Lord!�

“Yes, Severus?�

“My Lord, I just overheard a prophecy about you! It says that you will be destroyed by a baby born at the end of July to parents who have defied you three times!�

“Indeed?� A pause. “I must find the child and destroy him before he can destroy him. Tell me, Severus, which couples have defied me three times?�

“My Lord, I’m sure that I don’t know…�

“I’ll tell you.� Bellatrix stood up. “The Potters have three times defied you and that Mudblood is expecting… it’s difficult to know for certain, but I believe her baby is due at the end of July.�

“She’s not the only one!� Think quickly. “The Longbottoms have also defied you three times and their child is due at the same time, I’m sure.�

Another pause. “I will seek the Potters. It would be their child… the one most like myself.�

I told him the prophecy. I sent him looking for them.

I killed them.

*

“Don’t use me. It’s too obvious.�

“Padfoot, who else do we have?�

“Plenty of people! I’m the wrong person for this job.�

“Sirius, you’re the only person I can trust with my entire life and family.�

“What about Dumbledore? He’s a much better and less susceptible wizard than I am.�

“Dumbledore has enough on his mind. He doesn’t need this as well.�

“You think I don’t already have enough to deal with, James? I don’t know how you’re going to manage to stay inside until this is over as it is. If you get bored and leave and get captured… it would be too easy for them to make me betray Lily and Harry. Use someone less obvious. Less emotional. Less reckless.�

“Like who?�

“I don’t know… Wormtail? He’s about the last person anyone would expect.�

“Wormtail? Do you think he’s tough enough?�

“Of course he is. And he’s not terribly busy with other things… he’s someone you can trust, someone who Voldemort wouldn’t think important enough to question.�

“But can he undergo torture?�

“He’s been best friends with us for more than ten years. I think he can stand anything.�

I convinced James to switch, to make Peter Pettigrew his Secret-Keeper, to entrust his family to the rat.

I killed them.

*

“Good news, Wormtail?�

“Y-yes, my Lord… I can give you the P-potters.�

“Excellent, Wormtail.� He paused. “I must admit that I doubted your merit when you first joined me… but now you have proved your worth, Wormtail. With your help, not only have I managed to kill several Order members and anticipate their every movement, but now you have given me the most valuable piece of information. Once the baby is dead, I will be invincible.�

“M-my Lord… are you certain that Severus gave you the entire prophecy?�

“I am certain of what it means. The Potter boy must die.�

“The parents may be difficult… I’ve known them for years… James Potter won’t surrender…�

“Then he will die. Now Wormtail, where are they?�

I betrayed their location to the Dark Lord. I gave him the information he needed to destroy their baby.

I killed them.

*

“Please, my Lord, spare Lily Potter.�

“Please, James, don’t trust me with this.�

“Please, my Lord, what will my reward be?�

“I will offer her the choice, Severus.�

“All right, Padfoot, we’ll ask Wormtail.�

“Your reward will come later, Wormtail, once my power is secure.�

*

I won’t talk about that night. Everything ended that night. They died that night and it was my fault.

Their baby survived. I don’t understand why. All I knew was that Lily and James were dead.

*

She’s dead. She’s gone. I killed her and will never get her back.

I will mourn her. I will protect her son.

And I even mourn for Potter a bit. Although I hated him, in spite of what he did to me, I regret that he’s dead.

I regret that I killed them.

*

James…

I will never stop screaming his name, as though I could bring him back just by calling for him.

Even in this cell in Azkaban, I’m calling for him. One day, I will escape and I will make Harry understand what I did.

I tried so hard to protect them…

I couldn’t. And now they’re gone.

*

What have I done?

I knew that he would kill them. That was why he wanted to know where they were.

But now my friends are dead. Friends who trusted me.

I had no choice. If I hadn’t betrayed them, I would have been killed, tortured…

The Dark Lord is gone as well. The Death Eaters will kill me if they know I’m alive.

And I betrayed Sirius.

I destroyed them all.

*

I killed Lily and James.

I brought about the downfall of the darkest wizard of our times.

I am a killer.