It was a terrible nightmare, but one she was quite familiar with. Nightmare, yes, but it was almost like going back in time. She found herself at the wizard hospital in Paris, and she heard voices beyond a pale curtain.
“I am sorry Monsieur and Madame Lemieux, but there is nothing we can do.”
“You cannot be serious! My daughter is healthy!” her father’s voice trembled, but she couldn’t tell if it was anger or fear.
“She is healthy now, but as she grows older, she will get weaker. “
She heard the healer pause. Noelle leaned forward and peeked around the curtain. She saw the healer place his hand over her father’s. Her father wrenched his away, and buried his face in his hands.
“She’s my only child.”
His sobs rattled his own body, and Noelle’s as well. Then she heard her mother’s voice,
“How long does she have?”
The healer paused. “If she is careful, maybe until her mid-twenties. She shouldn’t have children; she will not be strong enough.”
Noelle sank back into her chair, reeling in shock. They couldn’t be talking about her, she felt fine. But even as she tried to tell herself that, she felt her heart pause, and skip a beat. It resumed slowly and out of rhythm. Her lungs tightened and she heard wheezing. She pressed her hand to her chest, and tried to relax. Then it hit her full force. She was dying, a little more each day. She would never have children, never even live to get married. What was the point of even putting me on the earth!, she inwardly raged.
The screaming startled both Severus and Lucius. They both jumped out of their chairs and rushed to her side. She was still asleep, but her screams were terrifying. Her hands were clammy and sweat poured down her pale face.
“Go get Madam Pomfrey!”
Severus turned back to Noelle as Lucius rushed from the room.
“Wake up, Noelle.”
He gently shook her. Still she screamed, and her eyes were shut tight. Madam Pomfrey hurried into the common room with Dumbledore at her heels. Dumbledore took one look at Noelle’s face and pulled his wand out. Pointing it at her throat, he muttered,
“Silencio.”
The screams ceased, but her mouth still moved. He conjured a stretcher and with the help of the two boys, lifted her onto it. As they were securing her to it, her mouth stopped moving.
“Nox.” Dumbledore said, and the spell lifted.
Leaning down, he placed his head next to hers, and heard words.
“Désolée, Maman...Je ne veux pas mourir.” (I’m sorry, Mama....I don’t want to die.) Noelle mumbled in French.
Dumbledore blanched, and hurried away with her.
In the hospital wing, Noelle was transferred to a bed. She was still tossing and turning, muttering under her breath in French.
“Has she gotten worse, Albus?” Madam Pomfrey inquired.
He shook his head, “I don’t know...We will have to wait.”
Slowly, Noelle came to, and she was alone. The nightmare was still so fresh in her head; she had to reassure herself that she was indeed at Hogwarts, and not in Paris. Voices floated into the room. She recognized them as her parents. She coughed deeply, and they pushed the curtain aside, and rushed to her bedside. Her mother hugged her tightly. They conversed quietly while her father spoke with Madam Pomfrey.
“I’m so sorry for worrying you, Maman. I just wanted to go home.”
Catherine Lemieux grasped Noelle’s hand tightly. “It does not matter, chérie. What happened to make you rush home?”
Noelle swallowed nervously. “I made a mistake, Maman. I kissed a boy.”
Her mother turned white. “And?” she whispered.
“I realized what I had done...so I left.” Tears again came to Noelle’s eyes. “But Maman, I like him. I like him so much.”
Catherine squeezed her daughter’s hand. “But chérie, you know this cannot be.”
“Why not, Maman? Don’t I deserve to be happy?” Noelle’s eyes shot fire.
“Of course you do. But Noelle, you must be fair to him. You know this.”
The rage that had arisen in her eyes died quickly. “I know. I am thinking he will not be wanting to talk to me anymore.”
Her mother nodded gravely. “Perhaps it is for the best, chérie.”
Noelle’s soul cried out in anguish, and she quickly suppressed a sob. “Perhaps, Maman.” She said, even though the words hurt to say.
Her father came to her side.
“Noelle. You had us very worried.” François Lemieux looked haggard.
She nodded weakly. “I am sorry, Papa.”
Her father sighed. “Very well. Madam Pomfrey believes she can fix you up. You’ll be better in a few days.”
She nodded again. “Catherine, we must be going.”
Her mother rose. They both kissed their daughter on the cheeks, and rapidly departed. Dumbledore peeked inside the curtains.
“Finish your potion and try to get some sleep.”
Noelle drained the goblet and quickly drifted off. As he made his way back to his office, he thought of how much the scene had disturbed him. Monsieur Lemieux had acted very cold towards his daughter. It was if he had already said his goodbyes.
After two days in the hospital wing, Noelle was ready to leave. She had spent Christmas there, and received cards from her friends at Beauxbatons. She had received nothing from the group still at the Potters, not that she had expected any. Still, Madam Pomfrey would not allow her to return to Gryffindor Tower. So she lay in bed, read some of her textbooks, and relaxed. She was itching to return to her daily routine, but not anxious to see Lily, James and the others.
She began to hear noises of the other students returning to school. Madam Pomfrey told her if she stayed tonight, she would be allowed to return to her dormitory the next night. She grudgingly agreed. As she was drifting off to sleep, she spied Sirius in the doorway. Her breath caught as he approached her bed. He looked at his feet as he spoke.
“I just wanted to say I’m sorry if I did anything that upset you.” He turned to leave.
“No, wait.” He stopped in his tracks and turned back to her. “Sirius, I was not fair to you. I never should have kissed you.”
As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she knew she had said the wrong thing. His face contorted in anger.
“Is that supposed to make me feel better, Noelle? You shouldn’t have kissed me? No, I should have known better than to try to fool myself into believing that you might actually have feelings for me.”
Tears poured unrestrained from her eyes and from his as well. He swiped at them angrily. “Forget it. I’m done.” He stormed away from her.
All alone, Noelle couldn’t believe what had just happened. An anguished sob escaped her lips. She had never felt such pain in her heart. It felt as if her soul was being ripped from her body. The little voice echoed in her head, this is a good thing...now you will hurt no one. Another voice tried to drown the first one out, how is this a good thing? I love him...and now he hates me. Noelle rolled over, clutching her pillow. The sobs racked her body, and finally, emotionally exhausted, she fell asleep.
Outside in the hallway, Sirius was trying to regain his composure before returning to his room. He heard her sobs, and his own tears were hard to suppress. Part of him was telling him to go to her, to wipe her tears away, to make everything better for her. Another part was scolding him. How could he have let himself fall for her? He had always known that he could never be with Noelle. Stop it, he told himself. She’s not worth it. But deep down, he knew she was. There was nothing he could do now. With his mind set, he strode purposefully back to Gryffindor Tower.