Chapter 4
The New and Most Noble Manor of Potter
Harry felt himself come to an abrupt stop on the front lawn of Number 12 Grimmauld Place and nearly fell forward on to his face before he caught himself.
“I’m never going to get used to that,” Harry mumbled bitterly.
Dumbledore paused and took a moment to look around.
“It’s OK Harry, you can remove the cloak if you like, the area is clear.”
Harry uncovered his head and started to unclasp his cloak but stopped when he felt a tingling sensation and the hair on his neck rise. It was a very peculiar impression that he vaguely recalled having once before during his fourth year. It caused him to instinctively draw his wand and take in as much detail as he could of his surroundings.
Night was everywhere. The streetlamps were out and the only visible light emanated from the stars in the sky.
Dumbledore began to stroll purposefully towards the front door with Harry in step behind him. The sensation of unease didn’t leave Harry and he felt a strong urge to turn around and face the street.
He observed an older woman in dark grey robes walking swiftly towards them. Harry thought she looked very much like Professor McGonagall but he felt sure that she wasn’t. Dumbledore didn’t seem to pay attention to her at all. She was only a few feet away from them when Harry noticed that the woman had her wand out. She stopped abruptly just a few feet away when Harry pointed his directly at her.
“Wotcher Harry! What happened to the rest of ya? Did you finally blow your buttocks off?” the Professor look-a-like questioned with a wink and a smirk.
“Tonks…” he was just about reply when he observed a slight shimmering of pearl like colors in the shape of a person coming towards them a few feet to the right side of her. Harry then moved his wand from Tonks to the lights.
The lights also immediately stopped their forward motion. He stared intently at the dim sparkling lights and was astonished to see that they were shaped just like a cloak. At the top he saw a tighter ball of light emanating where a persons left eye should be and swore he could also see a wide very light bluish beam coming from the ‘eye’ of light. The beam appeared to have focused itself onto Harry.
“Very good boy! You are getting stronger after all “ I was afraid you’d be a bit… well… Obviously Dumbledore was right,” the cloak of light stated gruffly in slight surprise.
“Professor Moody?”
Harry wondered what on earth the old Auror had done to himself to end up in such a state.
“Wow Harry, I didn’t know you could see through invisibility cloaks! I’m impressed!” the old woman “ Tonks exclaimed with enthusiasm.
Harry was dumbfounded. He didn’t know he could either…
“Yeah, he’s getting mighty strong alright but he’s still an idiot,” the still shimmering Moody stated matter-of-factly. “How many times do I have to tell you that I didn’t do much teachin’?”
“Don’t mind the old man there Harry, he’s just embarrassed he got caught with his pants down. Constant Vigilance eh?” kidded an amused Tonks.
“Don’t remind me - my damn eyeball still sticks every now and then, just hasn’t been the same since,” Moody complained as he removed his cloak.
Harry was surprised to see that Moody’s cloak still shimmered with opalescent colored lights as it draped over his arm and his magical eye still glowed with its blue beam and wondered why he hadn’t seen it before.
“Good to see you alive and well boy.”
Moody stepped forward and Harry shook his gnarled hand. He looked pretty much the same as Harry remembered; grizzled hair, chunks missing from his nose, beady right eye and a clawed wooden leg that thumped with every other step as he strolled to the front door and began whispering to Dumbledore in earnest.
“Right, Mr. Cheerful himself… It is good to see you again Harry.”
Tonks turned back into her bright pink spiky haired self and gave Harry a quick hug. She then pulled away and looked directly at him with a hint of concern.
Harry averted his eyes feeling uncomfortable under her scrutiny and removed the rest of his cloak. She was just about to say something more until he felt a hand on his shoulder and turned to find a very ragged looking Lupin with a small smile.
“Hello Harry, I see you look about as good as I feel.”
Harry hoped he didn’t look that bad, Lupin looked terrible! He had large dark circles under his eyes; his hair was a mess and if he appeared older before, then now he would be considered ancient. He was obviously having just as hard a time as Harry was with Sirius’ death.
‘Of course, he’s the last of the three friends… the last true Marauder…’ Harry didn’t know what to say. It hurt him to see Lupin in such a state.
“Come on Harry, let’s go inside.”
Lupin let go of Harry’s shoulder and closed the distance to the large front doors as Harry and Tonks followed.
Moody and Dumbledore had apparently finished whatever discussion they were having when they arrived.
“Just turn the handle and step inside if you please Harry,” Dumbledore stated as he and Moody stepped out of the way.
Harry braced himself, not knowing what to expect, and grasped the serpentine handle. He felt nothing out of the ordinary so he turned the knob and crossed the threshold, stepping into what was total darkness. Once he fully entered his new house however, the torch lamps that lined the walls and the hanging chandelier came immediately to life.
The portrait of Mrs. Black was still covered by shabby drapes and the entrance remained as gloomy as ever.
“May we enter?” asked Dumbledore.
Harry turned to see that everyone else was still outside on the doorstep.
“Oh… yes, err… of course come in.”
Harry stepped further into the entryway and made a sweeping gesture with his hand.
Dumbledore, Moody, Lupin, and Tonks walked into the main entrance of the home with Tonks whispering with a wink, “what a gentleman!”
Harry was about to ask what he should do next when Dumbledore spoke softly.
“Not here Harry, we’ll talk in the kitchen.”
They passed the portrait and the troll legged umbrella stand and followed the steps down to the main kitchen, which smelled dank and musty. The lamps were already on so they all took seats around the large rectangular table.
Dumbledore gave his wand a few waves and several mugs full of steaming tea and hot chocolate appeared on the middle of the table.
“Help yourselves please.”
Every one with the exception of Harry grabbed a cup. He had a strong feeling of unease in the pit of his stomach as he recalled quite vividly the fight Sirius had with Snape in this very room. Harry shook his head in an attempt to empty it.
Dumbledore next conjured a sack whose contents smelled suspiciously of raw meat, and seeing that Harry had chosen not to get anything to drink, set it in front of him. He then cleared his throat and spoke after he had everyone’s attention.
“Harry, I would ask that you return to us here once you have seen to Buckbeak. We can discuss our various courses of action and our plans without hindrance then.”
Harry suspected that they also wanted to talk about him amongst themselves. He was in half a mind not to give them the satisfaction, but the thought of a starving Buckbeak made him take the sack and silently rise. Once he had gotten to the kitchen door he paused and turned.
“What about Kreacher? If I see him I will kill him,” Harry stated firmly, looking directly at Dumbledore.
Moody’s real eye narrowed as his magical eye swiveled towards Dumbledore, Lupin gave a slight shiver but did not look up from his mug and Tonks gasped.
“Kreacher is no longer here Harry,” Dumbledore answered - his face an unreadable mask.
“As this is now your house, he is no longer bound to it. I’m afraid he now serves Narcissa Malfoy and her family.”
Harry nodded and left the kitchen closing the door behind him. He turned and walked up the stairs past the second floor landing where the heads of the previous house-elves resided and past a couple of half-closed doors that were once his and Ron’s and Hermione’s and Ginny’s.
He passed a couple more doors before reaching the old bedroom near the end of the hall that once was Mrs. Black’s. He grabbed the handle and prepared for the worst as he opened the bedroom door and entered.
Harry quickly raised the crook of his arm and covered his nose to stop the assault of stench that had struck him. He looked around the room to find droppings on one side, and the skeletal remains of rats and ferrets strewn all over the rest of the hay-covered floor.
Buckbeak gave a loud squawk of greeting and stood up as Harry approached.
“Sorry it took me so long to see you boy, I bet you’re starved,” he quietly said as he gently stroked the side of the large half-eagle half-horse like creature.
Buckbeak was clearly in need of companionship. Even in the dim light, Harry could see patches of fur and feathers missing and he definitely looked a lot thinner and in need of exercise. He didn’t look nearly as impressive as he had that night he and Hermione had ridden him to save Sirius.
“Hermione would go spare if she saw you like this. Thank goodness she’s not here,” Harry muttered absent-mindedly as he opened the bag of food and began dropping the large chunks of meat onto the floor.
He was relieved to see Buckbeak eating in earnest and it brought a small smile to his face to see his friend enjoying his meal.
“Let’s get some of these windows open shall we?”
After opening several windows, Harry gave Buckbeak a quick pat and another promise to tidy up the room upon his return and left.
Harry quietly closed the door behind him and chanced a look to his right towards the end of the hallway where Sirius’ bedroom once was and gave a start of surprise. The door stood slightly ajar and he could see a warm flickering glow emanating within.
“Sirius?” Harry whispered, not daring to believe his eyes.
He felt certain that the light was not there before but he was preoccupied when he first got up to the second floor. He slowly crept to the entrance of the bedroom and pushed the door fully open. What he saw gave him another surprise.
The first thing Harry noticed was the mixed scent of freshly laundered clothes and paint. He took another deep breath just to be sure and tried to take everything in at once. The room was huge and completely different than what he’d seen of the rest of the house so far.
The wooden floor looked polished and clean, the walls were Gryffindor red with golden accents- just as all the furniture appeared to be, and the glow came from the large roaring fire place to the right of the entrance.
In front of the fire sat an oval coffee table and in front of that sat a twin sofa. To the right and up against the wall was a hefty bookcase full of both old and new books. Up against the back wall and in between two night stands lay a King sized four-poster with a chest larger than the coffee table at the foot.
To his left sat another open door which led to a bathroom. In it contained a Roman bathtub, a separate shower, toilet and two sinks. There were brightly colored dials everywhere and it reminded Harry of the prefects’ bathroom back at Hogwarts.
Before he could take in the rest of the room he heard a tired mans voice calling to him from the bedroom entrance.
“I see that you’ve found Sirius’ surprise,” Lupin said standing in the doorway with his hands in his pockets.
“What do you mean?” responded Harry puzzled, turning to face Lupin from across the room.
“Look about you Harry. He made this room for you, he promised you a home. He didn’t want you to live in the same dreary house he had so he decided to fix the place up a bit and wanted to start with your room first. He had hoped to finish the rest of the rooms for your friends by the summer but…” he trailed off looking towards the fire.
“He“he did this for me?” Harry asked - gazing around stunned that Sirius had gone through so much trouble for him.
“Well, I helped a little, but it was his idea to brighten the place up,” Lupin paused for a second, “and after hearing about your room at your relatives, he wanted you to have the biggest room in the house with the nicest things he could find. He wanted to make sure you’d want to stay here.”
“I-I don’t know what to say…” Harry stammered.
“Sirius loved you Harry. I knew him a lot longer than you. We were friends and brothers. I know he went the way he wanted to. What I don’t know is how much longer he could have stayed trapped in this house regardless of what he was doing to improve it.”
“He died because of me,” Harry whispered, dropping his head as he sat on the edge of the bed.
Lupin sat next to Harry and they sat in silence for a minute before Lupin spoke again, this time with greater intensity and his voice shook of emotion;
“Listen to me Harry, if there is one thing I’ve learned in life-then it’s to live. Not breathing, eating and sleeping, but truly living. So many people go about their daily lives following one routine or another, not really paying attention to those around them and taking all their friends and family for granted- as if they’d live forever. That’s not living Harry. Sirius knew how to live. He appreciated every single moment he got to be with you, his best friends’ son, and he relished and looked forward to it because he knew time was short. It always was when Voldemort was around. You’d be talking to your best mate one day and in the next the dark mark would appear above their house, and that’s it Harry. All you ever had was the time you got to spend with them and then it’s gone and you can never get it back.”
Lupin paused once more and gripped Harry shoulder, though Harry refused to meet his eyes, and then continued;
“Sirius learned this lesson almost fifteen years ago and it nearly destroyed him. I know that he wouldn’t want you to suffer the same way he did. He would want you to only remember the best about him and the times you got to spend together. The fact that you knew he was innocent and accepted him as your God-father made him the happiest person in the world Harry. Don’t ever forget that.”
Lupin took a loud breathe and sighed.
“He’d want you to live Harry, not just exist, but live. Take his lesson and cherish those around you because you just don’t know…”
Harry sat motionless deep in thought. It made some sense he guessed, but the hole left in his heart by his God-fathers death remained as large as it ever did. It was still his fault he knew, and that didn’t make him feel any better.
‘Live? How can I possibly live when Sirius is dead?’ Harry tried desperately to suppress the well of guilt from growing in his chest and, while continuing to stare at the floor, forced himself to say out loud;
“Thanks, I’ll try.”
“I’ll do my best to be here for you Harry… if you need me.”
And with that, Lupin released his shoulder and walked out of the room; leaving Harry to sit and ponder what had just been said.