A/N: just want to thank all of my faithful reviewers. I do try to respond to as many of you as possible, but it's difficult. Nevertheless you are all very appreciated.
Chapter 8: Lessons with Alex
“Harry? You alright, mate?”
Harry looked up from his bed where he was sitting, holding his throbbing head in his hands. Ron was standing at the dormitory door, watching him.
“Uh… I’m fine. Don’t feel well,” Harry said.
He couldn’t possibly tell Ron what he was feeling. He couldn’t bear putting him through the pain, or seeing how he would react, what he would do if he knew.
“I’m going to go out and fly a bit,” Ron said quietly. “Euan wants to get some practice in “ you want to come?”
“No, it’s fine “ I think I should get to work on that Potions essay Snape set us,” Harry said.
“Hermione’ll be delighted,” Ron told him. “So you’re good then?”
“I’m good.”
“Alright,” Ron said unsurely, and cast him one more searching look before leaving.
Harry took a deep breath and tried to push back the horrible feeling that was overwhelming him. He grabbed his things and went downstairs to the common room to find Hermione; he could tell Hermione.
“Harry “ are you okay?” she asked immediately.
“No,” Harry said.
“What happened back there?”
“Let’s go to the library, we can do our Potions essays…” Harry muttered. Hermione immediately retrieved her own bag and they left the common room.
“That night “ when Ginny…was killed,” Harry began slowly. “We were running from the building. Lucius Malfoy had the three of us “ her, Katie and me “ I thought Katie was dead. Snape and Lupin, they came just in time and stunned Malfoy and told us to run. I hesitated “ because of Katie. But Ginny pulled me and we ran, but I stopped again. I just couldn’t bring myself to run…”
Hermione remained silent as Harry took a short pause. He had not told anyone what had happened that night; only that Bellatrix had found them escaping, and that she had killed Ginny; Nothing more. He felt the images flowing back into his mind as he spoke each word.
“When I finally turned to leave, Bellatrix found us. She knocked both of us to the ground “ Ginny’s ankle broke, and my wand flew from my hand. I did Lumos and lit my wand… it was too far away, a few feet past Bellatrix…so I ran for her. But she shot the curse at Ginny; I didn’t get there in time to stop her…”
“Harry “” Hermione began.
“Had I just done that Summoning Spell I could have stopped it,” he choked. “I could have stunned Bellatrix.”
They had stopped outside the library. Hermione gave him the all too familiar comfort phrase.
“It’s not your fault, Harry,” she said softly.
“I know it’s not my fault,” he said. “But I could have stopped it, if I’d just…”
He leaned hopelessly against the wall.
“Just knowing I might have been able to stop it…” he said. “It’s unbearable “ I wish I could just go back and do it again. Maybe I wouldn’t fail.”
“Come here, Harry,” Hermione said, leaning over to him and wrapping her arms around him. “I can’t begin to understand what this is like for you, and I know it’s not just going to go away “ but we’re all here for you. I’m here for you.”
Harry nodded fervently, his pain drowning in Hermione’s arms. He realized how lucky he was to have his friends. He slowly pulled away, and saw Hermione smile tearfully at him.
“You alright?” she asked.
“I’m going to be fine,” he said. “I just couldn’t tell Ron… didn’t want to upset him…”
“It makes sense,” Hermione said, still rubbing his arm. “Come on; let’s do this bloody essay…”
Harry gaped at her; Hermione never swore. She just grinned at him, and he smiled back. They made to enter the library, but Harry stopped.
“Hermione… you know…er “ you know that I love you, right?” he said.
“I know, Harry,” she said. “I love you, too.”
-
“Are you alright, Harry “ you seemed very upset yesterday in class…”
“I’m fine “ just some memories coming back to haunt me, I suppose…” Harry said listlessly. “I’m fine now, though.”
“Well, if you don’t mind me saying, I am truly impressed with the abilities you displayed yesterday “ you do realize that is very difficult magic?”
“So I’ve heard,” Harry said, shrugging his shoulders.
Alex eyed him hesitantly a moment or two before moving on.
“Today I thought we’d do some practical application with some of the spells from your summer lessons before learning anything new,” she told him, drawing her wand and conjuring what looked like dummies dressed as Death Eaters. Harry eyed them curiously for a moment; Alex had never done ‘practical application’ during their lessons over the summer.
“I want you to use anything and everything you’ve learned,” Alex said simply, before waving her wand over the three motionless figures.
Before Harry knew what was going on, the three figures were moving towards him, drawing wands. He took a stumbling step backwards, drawing his wand and aiming it at the middle figure, which was closest.
“Alsius Flamare!”
Bright blue flames emitted from Harry’s wand, hitting the middle figure, whose robes iced over as the flame spread through them, freezing it to the spot.
Harry quickly looked at the other two figures; both raised their wands at the same time and muttered spells, sending red jets of light at him.
“Chaos Protectum!” Harry said quickly, waving his wand in front of him; immediately a large abstract black barrier formed between himself and his attackers, and the spells were swallowed up inside. One of the figures leapt back from the wall quickly, but the other was not fast enough, and was sucked towards it. He fell through and landed unconscious next to Harry’s feet.
“Finite Incantatum,” Harry muttered, waving his wand past his protective wall, which disappeared instantly. He then immediately turned to the figure who had escaped his Chaos Spell.
“Vigil Tenebrae!” he spat, drawing a circle in the air with his wand, and then pointing it to the figure, which was approaching him quickly. Streams of black and white issued from his wand and hit the final attacker, causing it to stumble for a moment before stopping and remaining quite still, as though it had frozen in fear.
Alex stepped forward, waving her wand over each of the figures, causing them to vanish.
“Very impressive, Harry,” she said. “Excellent use of the Waking Blindness “ I’ve always wanted to perform that one myself, though as you know…”
“Only a Legilemens can perform it,” Harry finished for her, slightly out of breath. “Thanks for the warning by the way.”
“Do you expect real attackers to come with a warning, Harry?” Alex said darkly.
“Oh, so you were helping me, then?” Harry said, not able to suppress a grin.
“Well, you’re doing excellently. I’m wondering if you try doing some of these more advanced spells without holding your wand “ like yesterday in class.”
“I could work on it…” Harry said.
“I think we should; it’s something Ron and Hermione and theotherswon’t be able to attempt for a while, so that will give us something to work on during your private lessons. I think we’ll start with a simple Stunning Spell, because you’ll have to work on aim with any offensive spells.”
Harry just nodded, as Alex conjured another dummy.
“Don’t worry, this one won’t move “ not yet, at least,” she said as Harry laid his wand down and stepped a few feet away from it. “Let’s just see what you can do with it; focus on where you want the Stunner to go.”
Harry narrowed his eyes, concentrating on the dark figure in front of him, and thought carefully of his wand.
“Stupefy!”
To his immense surprise, a jet of red light issued from his wand; unfortunately, it went nowhere near his target, but instead it hit Alex “ who immediately fell to the floor.
“Bloody hell!” Harry gasped, as he reached quickly for his wand and revived her. “Sorry about that…”
Alex looked a little dazed, but laughed after a moment.
“That’s quite alright, Harry,” she said. “But clearly, this is something we’ll need to work on.”
“And you might want to hide behind something while we’re at it…” Harry said, grinning.
They set it up again, this time with Alex far away from the wand. Harry took a deep breath and tried to concentrate a bit harder.
“Stupefy!”
The wand emitted the spell yet again, and Harry felt it hit him as he blacked out. A moment later Harry found himself on the floor, having been revived by Alex.
“Too bad I didn’t have a camera,” she sighed, and Harry saw her trying to keep a straight face. “That was priceless, but it definitely won’t do.”
Harry groaned as he stood up, rubbing the place on his chest where he’d been hit with his own spell.
“That’s one of the most powerful Stunning Spells I’ve ever been hit by, if I say so myself,” he said, grinning.
“As powerful as it might be, it won’t do you much good,” Alex replied. “Focus on your target, Harry.”
Harry focused on his target, and practiced. They practiced over and over again for an hour. By the time they were finished, the spells were still not hitting their mark, but were at least heading in its general direction. Finally, Harry looked down at his watch and saw it was time for dinner. They both pocketed their wands and headed down for the Great Hall together.
“What are we doing on Saturday, then?” Harry asked her.
“I want to what we did today, “practical application”,” Alex told him. “Just don’t tellthe otherswhat to expect, I want to catch them off guard.”
“Will do,” Harry said. “Have you heard from Lupin, lately?”
“No “ he’s supposed to be confined during the week previous to the full moon, so right now he’s unable to send any letters.”
“How was Manchester, then?” he asked. “Lupin told me the place they’re keeping him is nice, but I was a bit worried…”
“Don’t “ it’s lovely. They’ve made his stay very comfortable,” Alex reassured him.
They talked a bit more about Lupin, before reaching the Great Hall.
“I’ll see you in class, then…” Harry said as they went inside.
“Actually, we’re going to be continuing yesterday’s lesson “ so if you’d prefer to use your class time to do something else, you don’t need to come…”
“Oh, alright then. Thanks Alex “ see you Saturday, then,” he said, walking towards Ron and Hermione, who were seated at the end of the Gryffindor House table.
“See you Saturday,” Alex replied, and headed up to the staff table.
“On a first-name basis with the Defense professor?” a girl’s voice said behind Harry.
He turned to see Siobhan eyeing him mischievously.
“And what if I am?” Harry said casually.
“It’s just unusual,” she shrugged, her eyes still twinkling.
“I’ll see you later, Siobhan,” Harry said irritably, before turning from her.
“Later, Potter,” he heard her reply as he sat across from Ron and Hermione.
“How was your lesson?” Hermione asked promptly.
“Interesting,” Harry said honestly. “I accidentally stunned Alex. And myself.”
Ron gave a snort of laughter; Hermione smacked his arm and turned back to Harry.
“How?” she asked nervously.
“Nothing to worry about,” he said. “I was practicing doing spells without holding my wand. I could do the Stunning Spell easily, but I had a bit of trouble with my aim…”
“That’s very complicated magic, Harry,” Hermione said admirably.
“Yeah…” Harry replied. “How about the two of you? What were you up to while I was gone?”
“Weeshadshameentingwishdummbldr,” Ron said through a mouthful of roast beef. Hermione smacked his arm again.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Ronald,” she said, before turning to Harry and clarifying. “We had a meeting with Dumbledore.”
“Mwhym?” Harry asked, also through a mouthful of food; Hermione scowled.
“It’s part of our Head duties,” Ron explained, having swallowed his food. He turned to Hermione. “And how come you didn’t hit him for talking with his mouth full?”
“He’s across the table, and he’s not my boyfriend,” Hermione replied simply.
“Anyway…” Ron continued. “Dumbledore’s under a lot of pressure about that stuff Skeeter wrote in the Daily Prophet…”
“Surprise, surprise,” Harry replied tonelessly.
“It’s bad, Harry,” Hermione said seriously.
“Some members of the Ministry have requested that he cancel all Quidditch activities, Care of Magical Creatures classes, and Hogsmeade visits,” Ron said quietly.
“Basically anything involving students being too far from the castle,” Hermione added.
“But they can’t do that,” Harry said incredulously. “That’s completely ridiculous!”
“Luckily, Madam Bones is still supporting Dumbledore,” Hermione told him. “So, for now we don’t have to worry “ but if there’s enough pressure from the Prophet or the public…”
She didn’t finish. They all knew what would happen if there was too much pressure on Dumbledore. Harry wondered miserably why the most fun parts of being at Hogwarts all happened to occur far outside the castle walls.
“Hagrid could probably teach classes inside the school,” Hermione said.
“But Quidditch…” Ron said.
“And Hogsmeade,” Harry added. “Hogsmeade will be the only chance I get to see Katie until Christmas.”
“Which reminds me,” Hermione said brightly. “Ron and I suggested to Dumbledore that seventh years be allowed more frequent visits to Hogsmeade.”
“What’d he say?” Harry asked, feeling his hopes rise significantly.
“He’s going to consider it,” Ron said.
The three of them were quiet for a few moments.
“So, did Alex say what we’ll be doing on Saturday?” Hermione asked gingerly.
“Something about ‘practical application’…” Harry told her.
Hermione was quiet again, and Harry saw her share a nervous glance with Ron.
“If there’s something the two of you want to say, I suggest you just say it…” Harry said with a bite of impatience, realizing that something was going on.
“Well, we were just thinking,” Ron began. “With the defense lessons, and all “ and with the, you know “ prophecy…”
“How are you planning on doing it?” Hermione said quickly.
“Doing what?” Harry asked.
“How are you planning on killing him?” Ron said, issuing a cautious glance around them.
“Oh…” Harry said. “Didn’t really think about it…”
“How could you not think about it?” Hermione squeaked.
“Well, I’ve thought about it,” Harry said. “But just haven’t considered how “ I always just assumed…”
“…that you would use the killing curse?” Ron whispered.
Harry didn’t like to consider it, but it was the only foreseeable way. None of the spells Alex was teaching him could be used to end someone’s life. He thought of the time he had attempted to use Crucio against Bellatrix, and what she had said about Unforgivable Curses “ that righteous anger would not truly power them. And surely everything he felt against Voldemort was righteous anger; the thought of taking pleasure in anyone’s death made Harry feel sick.
He thought of Lucius Malfoy taking pleasure in Mr. Weasley’s death, and in Mrs. Bell’s death. He thought of Bellatrix taking pleasure in murdering Ginny.
Hermione seemed to know what he was thinking.
“There’s another way, Harry,” she said quietly. “There has to be…”
“We know there’s another way, mate,” Ron added. “And we’re going to help you find out what that is…”
Harry looked up at his two best friends, and hoped with all his heart that they were right.