A/N: So, after two months of waiting, here’s a new chapter! I’m sorry for the delay, and I’m also sorry if it seems a bit stupid, but I finished this at about 11 at night.
“Why can’t one day be normal around here?” Harry asked grumpily as he, Ron and Hermione headed back to the common room after dinner. Harry was asking grumpily because a rampant flock of pelicans had tied to impale him. He’d only managed to avoid them by ducking behind a large box of light bulbs.
“This is Hogwarts, mate,” said Ron, brushing filaments and glass off of his robes. “Nothing’s ever normal here.” They were silent for a moment, then Ron asked, “So, what do you guys think’ll happen next?”
“What do you mean?” Harry asked.
“With this suggestion-thingy, what crazy stuff do you think is gonna happen next?”
“Ron, that’s a terrible thing to say!” Hermione admonished. “We should be trying to stop this, not encouraging it to continue!”
“You’re just upset because you’re the first one it got, I think it’s funny.”
“It is not funny, Ron!”
“Give it a rest, will you?” said Harry.
They were now about to turn into the Fat Lady’s corridor, passing a suit of armor, when Harry suddenly fell flat on his face.
“Harry, are you all right?” questioned Hermione.
“Yeah, I’m fine,” he replied, brushing himself off. He looked over his shoulder and said, “I think that suit of armor tripped me.”
Ron and Hermione turned to look at the armor too. It was obviously trying its best to appear nonchalant, gazing in the opposite direction and whistling creakily. Harry stormed over and kicked it in its metal shin out of temper. Then, out of equal temper, the armor swung the axe it was holding at Harry’s head. Harry just managed to duck out of the way. The armor pulled its axe back, trying to get another attack off. Harry took off, Ron and Hermione on his heels, and they ran as fast as they could toward the Fat Lady’s portrait. The armor was in hot pursuit, squeaking menacingly and swinging its axe wildly. They barely managed to jump in the common before the suit of armor crashed into the wall behind them, just missing the Fat Lady.
The three got shakily to their feet and glanced at the back of the Fat Lady’s picture, behind which the sounds of the armor clinking away could be heard. They then turned to see the entire common room staring at them.
“Um, all right there?” asked Ginny.
“Oh yeah, just a crazy suit of armor,” said Ron in a would-be-casual voice.
The next day found our heroes in a long and sunlit passageway on the seventh floor.
“What are we doing here?” Ron asked. “This way usually takes us to Trelawney’s room.”
“Plot device,” said a painting of a wizard with a thick moustache.
“Yeah, well, I’m going to lunch. You two coming?”
Harry shrugged. “Better than just standing around here, I guess.”
They started back downstairs to the Great Hall. Ron, who was in the lead, got around a corner before he ran into someone. He muttered an “excuse me” and continued on with the other two.
“Stand and fight, scurvy dogs!” yelled the someone.
“Oh no,” muttered Harry as they looked back around.
Sir Cadogan, the crazed knight who usually was in a painting in this particular hallway, was instead standing in the middle of the corridor, life sized but, actually, no more intimidating than usual.
“I said, stand and fight!”
“And I said I’m going to lunch,” countered Ron. “We really don’t have time to fight.”
“Coward! A knight does not run from battle!”
“Wait…” said Harry. “I have someone you can fight.”
“Really?” said the knight eagerly. “Where is this knave?”
“He’s the suit of armor by the Fat Lady’s corridor. He tried to chop my head off yesterday.”
“The dastardly villain! I shall defeat him soundly!” And he ran off down the hall, sword drawn.
“That’s one way to take care of a problem,” said Hermione.
The trio was heading back to the Gryffindor common room after lunch when they ran into Professor Arbitrare.
“Hello trio,” he said. “Say, did you guys sic Sir Cadogan on that suit of armor upstairs?”
“Um…well…” Harry started.
“Well, I’m just wondering because I think the armor all around the school started a revolt and are attacking just about anyone.”
“No!” said Hermione, looking horrified.
“Oh yeah. I think their ringleader’s that tall one with the axe. He’s been asking around for you three, you know.” There was a slight pause. “Well, see ya!” He walked back down the hall.
When he was out of sight, Hermione rounded on Ron. “See? We’ve got to do something about this!”
“Don’t blame me, Harry told him to go after the armor!”
“Don’t drag me into this,” Harry warned.
“Oh come on, let’s just find that suit of armor,” said Hermione.
“He’s just off the Charms corridor,” said Arbitrare, as he had just doubled back down the hallway. “Er, haven’t I been here before?”
Not too much later, Harry, Ron and Hermione were at the Charms corridor, passing a pair of suits of armor rolling Snape up in a large rug. They continued on and saw the lead armor laughing through its visor at Snape’s predicament. It stopped at the sight of Harry, however, and picked up its axe.
At the same time, Sir Cadogan came charging down the hall at the axe-wielder, tripped over Snape and went sliding, stopping in between Harry and the armor.
“Wait, haven’t you already fought him?” asked Harry.
“I was going to, but he moved,” said Sir Cadogan. He got to his feet, sized up his enemy, then declared, “I need a mount!”
The clip clop of hooves was heard, then the Crumple Horned Snorkack came into sight. It cantered up to Sir Cadogan, then mooed. Everyone stared at it for a minute.
“A steed is a steed!” yelled Cadogan, and hopped on. His ride walked up to the suit of armor and pushed it with a well-placed horn. The armor waved its arms like pinwheels, then fell with a resounding crash to the floor. The Snorkack then stood on top of it and proceeded to eat its helmet.
“That cow’ll eat anything,” said Ron incredulously.
Yay! Chappie 4! So, now that it's here, show your appreciation by reviewing! Everyone loves a good review!