Dumbledore raised his head quickly when he heard this, but motioned Hermione to continue with a nod of his head.
“I thought I was dreaming at first, but then he smiled at me, and waved. I wanted to run and tell Ron to come quickly. I needed someone else to confirm what I was seeing. But then he started speaking.
“He told me that he hadn’t really died, but that he was in another place and was trying desperately to return to Harry. He said he couldn’t do it by himself, that he needed the help of another. He talked a lot like that. He didn’t directly ask for my help, but instead just told me of what he was going through.
“I knew how grieved Harry was by his death, and all I could think about was the fact that Harry would be able to see him in this mirror once he got to Grimmauld Place. When I said this to sirius however, he looked saddened and told me that Harry wouldn’t be able to see him; he told me that I was the only one who could. I had somehow stumbled across a link from our world to his and was the only one who could help him to try and find his way back.
“He was very insistent on me not telling anyone else about it. He said he feared the link would be broken if others knew about it. He told me he didn’t know how it was working in the first place and so couldn’t risk the link being lost. I agreed. I don’t know why now, but I did. I didn’t want to risk this one chance of giving Harry back his Godfather. All I could think about was Harry and how much easier his life would be with sirius by his side. He asked me to come and talk to him everyday, to see if we could work out how to get him back and I agreed.
“Ron, at this stage was very suspicious. Ginny was annoyed with me for leaving the work that we were supposed to be sharing for her to do on her own. That was when Ron started insisting that he work with me directly. He had found me coming downstairs from the third floor one day and we had a massive row about it. I refused to tell him what I was doing up there. I’m afraid I said a lot of very hurtful things to him. Things I would NEVER normally say in the heat of an argument. Things I would never ever have said to Ron,” Hermione finished quietly almost to her self.
“He didn’t try to talk to me much after that. He just continued to insist that we work together and so limited the times that I could sneak up to the mirror on the third floor. By now, it wasn’t the garden that attracted me there anymore.
“Sirius had told me of a book that could help. It was a book of dark magic that was in the library on the third floor. My instincts told me that I shouldn’t use it or look at it, but it was as if I was compelled to do so. I seemed to have no free will. I got the book and noted some of the spells that he had mentioned in my diary. He had told me that I would have to study them, would have to believe in the words, give myself totally to them in order for the spell to be successful.”
Dumbldore watched Hermione kindly as she told her story. He could sense how much it was costing her to admit what she had done. He could tell that she would find it hard if not impossible to forgive herself. However, he maintained his silence, judging it best that Hermione get to tell her story as quickly as possible.
“On the day that Harry arrived, Ron had gone to my room to look for me,” Hermione continued. “He had found my diary and when I walked in, he was sitting on the bed with it in his hands. I didn’t know whether he had found the spells or not, but decided that defence was the best form of attack and so I accused him of reading something that was private. I told him I would never trust him again. I said a lot of other things that I don’t remember now. I would not listen to him when he tried to explain that he thought it was just a homework diary. After all, there was no name on it and nothing that would have denoted it to be a diary. But I wouldn’t listen.”
Hermione stopped and shook her head, thinking about all that she had said and done. And now Ron was injured, possibly soul-less after his encounter with the Dementors.
Dumbledore coughed gently, “I know its difficult Miss Granger, but you are nearly at the end of the story. Please continue if you can.”
Hermione took a deep breath and ploughed on.
“I found that I couldn’t really talk to Harry. Things had changed. I was obsessed with getting the magic to work so that sirius would return. But now it wasn’t really about sirius anymore. It was the mirror. It provided a link that I was desperate to open. I still am not even sure why.
“This morning, I felt different when I awoke. I just knew that I was ready, that the time had come to try out the spell. In the afternoon I slipped out of the room that Harry and Ginny were working in and made my way upstairs. I felt like I was in a trance. I got to the room and sat in front of the mirror. There was sirius, but it didn’t really look like the sirius that we knew. His eyes were hard and cold, as was his voice. He told me to maintain eye contact with him while I gained the strength to utter to spell. He told me it would take some time, and that I just needed to concentrate.
“I felt as if time had stood still, all I could see were sirius’s eyes and I felt a certain strength enter me. I remember vaguely hearing a muffled voice. But it was like a sound coming from underwater. It was neither clear nor discernable. I felt a hand on my shoulder and was about to break eye contact to look around when sirius shouted at me not to do so.
“I felt the hand move from my shoulder and could feel the temperature in the room drop. That must have been when the Dementors arrived. I couldn’t see them but had a feeling that I had given them access through the connection in the mirror.
“The strength continued to flow through me and as if by its own volition, my hand began to move towards the glass, I could hear the words of the spell being spoken in my mind but it didn’t sound like my voice. I could see sirius lips moving but the voice didn’t sound like his either.
“It was then, just as I was about to make contact with the mirror and complete the link, that Harry knocked me to the ground. I could feel this terrible anger build up inside of me. It was like it belonged to someone else. I tried to get up, to get back to the mirror but Harry cast the body bind spell on me.
“I could hear him try and utter the spell to issue a Patronus, but he was having difficulty. He tried repeatedly. I could see him crouched on the ground holding his head in his hands out of the corner of my eye. Then he seemed to see Ron lying there and from his knees he gasped out the spell and I could see the burst of light erupt.
“The room temperature started returning to normal and I could feel the anger leaving me suddenly. It was only then that I felt like I was back in my own body, my own mind. It was as if I had been lifted from a trance. And all I could do was wonder what the hell I had just done.”
By now, Hermione’s face was tear-streaked. She was sitting beside Dumbledore once again, her head in her hands.
He slowly nodded and placing a hand on her shoulder, she heard him mutter an incantation. Hermione felt at peace suddenly. Like a warm blanket had been placed around her chilled and exposed emotions.
“You did well Miss Granger. Had it being a weaker individual, Lord Voldemort might have managed to make you complete the incantation much earlier. In which case he would already have been in the in headquarters where Harry arrived. He would have been ready to fight a young and broken boy who would not have been able to put up much of a battle. Instead in you he found a witch that he knew he would have to take his time to convince that it really was sirius Black you were talking to.”
Dumbledore nodded slowly at her stunned reaction. “Yes Hermione. It was Voldemort that you have been conversing with. sirius’s death left a powerful void in you and in everyone who had known and loved him. In Grimmauld Place this void was felt most strongly. It affected everyone who went to the house. The dark and gloomy atmosphere was the physical manifestation of the death of the final person in the bloodline of the noble Black family.
“Unfortunately, his death seemed to open a portal to another realm where his, shall we say less-charitable relatives dwell. Lord Voldemort became aware of this. He gained an understanding of the black magic that was used to protect the house originally, black magic that he could turn to suit his own needs. While he knew he couldn’t enter the headquarters even if he should know its location due to the wards that surround it as well as the protection that was bestowed through the death of sirius, he began to realise that it could be entered directly through the portal, as long as someone already at the headquarters spoke the spell and opened the link by touching the mirror.”
“Professor “ Why would sirius’s death have prevented him from entering the headquarters?” Hermione asked.
“A bond of love Hermione. sirius died in an attempt to save Harry. He died thinking only of Harry. It is not the same as the bond that was formed between Harry and his mother, in that it wouldn’t protect Harry directly, however it is powerful enough to bestow protection to sirius’s house which is now Harry’s.”
Hermione nodded her head. She felt weak and exhausted from her ordeal of having to tell Dumbledore about everything. She still couldn’t believe what she had done, and done of her own free will by all accounts.
Dumbledore chuckled slightly, shaking his head “Your own free will? Not at all Miss Granger. As you said “ you felt you were in a trance. I believe that on you first seeing sirius in the mirror you gazed into his eyes and were enchanted with a spell that would ensure that while you still needed to be convinced of what you were seeing, once you were sure that this was indeed sirius, you would feel honour bound to help him,” he finished. Hermione blinked taking in what Dumbledore was saying, aware that he had just read her mind.
“You need to rest now Ms Granger. I need to get back to Harry and Ron and see how they are doing,” he said.
“Professor, will they be alright?” she asked timidly, almost afraid of the answer.
Dumbledore stood surveying the carpet at his feet. He sighed deeply again. “One can only hope Miss Granger. One can only hope.”