CHAPTER V
REMATCH
Lucius came bursting in through the main door, his eyes vivid and on the verge of popping out. “You!” He approached the cage dangerously, pointing furiously at Harry, and then continued, “I went all the way to Middle Earth only to find… guess what?… NOTHING! There was no point in sending me there, you stupid boy. It was totally worthless! Orcs everywhere! And there was this big flaming eyeball-thingy that kept eyeing me up and down. I mean as if! Can’t believe I thought you were telling the truth! No Invisibility Cloaks whatsoever! Totally pointless! The only bright side was that I met this really nice chap. Gimli, that was his name. He told me about this quest he was on… Hilarious! And to think we have problems! Oh, but this Gimli was so funny, you should have been there, Bucklenott!”
“Lucius,” Bucklenott was almost boiling with rage. “Are you quite finished with tales of your boyfriend? We have work to do “ we have to continue this interrogation since we walked into a dead end!”
“He’s not my boyfriend,” Lucius replied sulkily at being prevented from further explanations. But Harry was almost sure he heard Lucius adding in a mumble, “…yet.”
Voldemort woke up with nervousness in his pores. He wanted so badly to know if his servants had found out where Harry hid his Cloak. He knew he would have to wait until the evening to contact them again, because using the common room’s fireplace in the middle of the day did not seem like a possibility.
Voldemort, after taking a shower, dressed quickly and left for the Great Hall and breakfast. He had only been back at Hogwarts for two days but remembered the fastest way to the Great Hall clearly. He sat down next to Fleur; Hermione opposite her.
“Good morning, sweet pea,” Fleur cooed.
“Morning,” Voldemort smiled, and got a quick peck on the cheek by his girlfriend. He could definitely get use to this life of Potter’s.
“Darling…” Fleur began, now less cheerful, “I ‘ave to go back to France today.”
“What?” Voldemort asked. “Why?”
“My mozzer and fazzer miss me and I’m starting my studies next week,” she answered sadly.
“Oh, really?” Hermione asked, interested. “What are you studying?”
“I’m going to study ‘Torture Methods and Red Nails’ at ze ‘ighest level at ze University of Veela,” Fleur smiled.
“Interesting…” Hermione nodded with one eyebrow raised.
“So, anyway,” Fleur continued, “I will just go pack.”
“All right,” Voldemort replied sadly.
“I zink we should just end what we ‘ad, ‘Arry,” Fleur stated. “I’m not good at long-distance relationships.”
“Okay…” Voldemort sighed.
“Besides, I’ve met someone else,” Fleur added.
“What?!” Voldemort was seriously hurt now. “Already?”
Fleur snorted, “As if you didn’t know about me and Neville Longbottom.”
“And Justin Finch-Fletchery…” she added.
“…and Padma Patil.”
“WHAT?!”
“I’m going to ask you, Potter, and I’m only going to ask you once,” Bucklenott warned. “Where is your Invisibility Cloak?”
“Not going to tell you, chica,” Harry replied with a shrug.
“Okay, I’m going to ask you, Potter, and I’m only going to ask you twice,” Bucklenott continued. “Where is your Invisibility Cloak?”
“Why do you even think I have one?” Harry asked.
“The Dark Lord said you did,” Lucius smirked.
“Oh, yeah, then it must be true “ Voldemort’s always right,” Harry mocked.
“Yes,” Bucklenott replied icily.
“Wasn’t he one of those guys who until recently thought the Earth was flat?” Harry asked arrogantly.
Bucklenott looked at tad embarrassed, “He… he was mislead.”
“Yeah, to the wrong queue when they handed out brains,” Harry snorted.
“Silence!” Lucius barked.
“It’s not my fault Voldemort was from the days when you thought it helped on warts to swing a dead cat over your head at full moon!” Harry responded icily.
“You will not insult the master further!” Bucklenott warned.
“Oh, yeah?!”
“YEAH!”
“What are you going to do about it?”
“HA!” Bucklenott snorted. “You forget, Potter, that I have already found your weakness. Lucius, turn on the reruns of ‘The Bachelor’.
Harry’s eyes widened in horror, but Lucius mumbled, “We don’t have that tape anymore…” He was looking at his feet, the right one obsequiously tracing a line in the wooden floor.
“And why, may I ask, not?” Bucklenott asked, his voice dangerously low.
“Erm…” Lucius looked utterly uncomfortable. “I watched it all night and apparently the tape couldn’t handle it and burst into flames.”
“You fool!” Bucklenott fumed.
“At least I did not use all night downloading adult films from the Wizard Network!” Lucius spat.
“Stick to the point!” Bucklenott spluttered.
Hermione, who had just spent two hours in the library, having a very heartbreaking conversation, entered the Gryffindor common room with a sad expression. She sat down with a huge sigh next to Ginny on the couch. “Malfoy and I just broke up.”
“YES! Finally!” Ginny exclaimed. “I mean… oh, Hermione, I'm so sorry.”
“Thank you, Ginny,” Hermione smiled, “you’re such a good and understanding friend with no ulterior motives.”
“That’s me!” Ginny smiled, patting Hermione awkwardly on the back.
Hermione felt so thankful for having such a good friend. She smiled as her other two best friends entered the common room.
“Hey,” Harry said as he sat down opposite Hermione and Ginny.
“Hey, Harry, Ron,” Hermione smiled weakly.
“Something wrong, ‘Mione?” Ron asked.
“Malfoy and I just ended our relationship,” Hermione answered. “Well, you couldn’t actually call it a Relationship, but Two Enemies Who Occasionally Shag And Have Nothing But Physical Attraction Towards Each Other is just too long a description to remember.”
Ron apparently didn’t know what to say because he just gave her an affectionate smile and then turned to Harry. “Oh, Harry, I just heard about Fleur and Terry Boot. So sorry for you, mate.”
“What?!” Harry exclaimed. “Him too?!”
Ron looked quite put out by Harry’s outburst.
“All tight, that’s it!” Harry stated, turning around in his armchair to face the whole common room. “Who in here has NOT been with Fleur Delacour at any time?!”
A couple of first year girls and a fourth year boy with impurities raised their hands.
“I don’t believe it!”
“All right,” Bucklenott calmed down, “we’ll just have to come up with another form of torture.”
“In the film area?” Harry asked.
“Yes, if we can find a film that you equally loathe,” Bucklenott answered.
“How about the Lord of the Rings?” Harry proposed.
“You hate that?” Lucius asked hopefully.
“Yes, can’t stand it!” Harry answered, mock-shuddering.
“Well, then,” Bucklenott smiled. “Find that film, Lucius.”
“Shall do,” Lucius replied and went out of the southern door.
Lucius returned only minutes later with a tape in his hand. “It’s just the first one of the three,” he announced.
“That’ll do,” Bucklenott smirked. He laughed and continued, “Prepare to unveil the secret of the whereabouts of your Invisibility Cloak, Potter!”
Lucius started the film and Harry positioned himself as comfortably as possible. After a while, Harry couldn’t help himself from doing the lines along with the characters. “If by my life or death I can protect you, I will. You have my sword “ And you have my bow “ And my ass. Whoops! ‘Axe’, I always let that one slip!”
Bucklenott narrowed his eyes in comprehension. “I’m beginning to doubt that this is torture to the boy, Lucius.”
“I think you’re right,” Lucius replied.
“Really?” Bucklenott asked excitedly. “That’s never happened before.”
“Oh, Bucklenott, you silly old thing,” Lucius giggled, dismissing the idea with a waving hand. “You’re just being modest.”
Bucklenott giggled along with him but abruptly stopped when he remembered the situation. “Lucius, stop the film!”
Lucius hurriedly stopped it and awaited Bucklenott’s continuation.
“This is the last time you mislead us!” Bucklenott fumed, his eyes boring dangerously into Harry’s. “We will break you. Oh, yes… we will.”
“How?” Harry snorted.
“We will find a way,” Bucklenott replied smoothly. “Lucius, watch the boy. I’ll be back soon.”
“Sure,” Lucius responded and sat down on a chair next to the cage as Bucklenott disappeared through the western door.
“So, Mr. Malfoy,” Harry began. “Did you like the film?”
“Yeah,” Lucius shrugged. “But that dwarf reminds me of someone… wait a minute! That was Gimli! But then… he was just an actor. He was just acting. I can’t believe he mislead me like that! And I thought we had a future together, but it’s no way to start a relationship with lies! Oh, the horrible lies! He wasn’t even the real Gimli.” Lucius was now sobbing into the sleeves of his robes. “How could he lie to me?! Oh, men are so insensitive!”
Harry was quite startled by Lucius’ sudden flow of emotions but saw no other option than to stretch his arm out of the cage bars and pat Lucius on the back.
“But maybe,” Lucius continued, sniffing, “maybe I should have picked up on him only acting when he said ‘Get away from the camera line! They’re filming!’”
Voldemort was in a very bad mood. To find out one’s girlfriend had been with two thirds of the Gryffindor house, two boys from Hufflepuff, and a Ravenclaw girl was one thing, but not getting dessert after lunch was a completely different thing.
Voldemort was fuming when we walked with Ron to their Muggle Studies class.
After the students had entered and Professor Kelsey had given them an assignment to be handed in the next week, the Professor put on another film. Voldemort positioned himself comfortably with his feet up as the Magivision showed the second film of his life. Secretly he liked the concept and was rather looking forward to this next one. He watched expectantly as the words Mary Poppins appeared in yellow letters.
Harry sat alone in the dark room of the Riddle House; Lucius had left him only minutes ago to go call on his mother. Harry was resting his head on his arms, looking up into the extremely filthy ceiling. Suddenly he heard a door being roughly opened, and he looked to the side to see Bucklenott approach his cage.
“Ready for torture?” he asked, smirking.
“Yes,” Harry answered simply.
“Ready for horror?”
“Yes.”
“Ready for intolerable cruelty?”
“What? The film?”
“No, the pain.”
“Then yes.”
“Damn!” Bucklenott stomped his foot on the floor. “How come you’re ready for all this?! You’re not supposed to be! The bad guys are supposed to bring this upon you without you knowing it!”
“See, that’s where your little theory goes wrong,” Harry replied, sitting up. “I’m not your average hero. I’m Harry Potter. There’s no one out there like me. Superman, Batman, Spiderman… nuh-uh, I’m the real thing. For God’s sake, I’m Harry freaking Potter.”
“Wow, you really think highly of yourself, don’t you?” Bucklenott asked, resting his hands on his hips, his head askew.
“No, I’m an altruist.”
“Yes, that very clear,” Bucklenott mocked. He shook his head in disbelief but suddenly stopped as comprehension dawned on his face. Harry looked a little stunned by this change of expression and awaited nervously the reason for it.
“Thank you, boy,” Bucklenott smiled. “You’ve just given me the idea for the perfect torture.”
“I-I have?”
“Yes, you seem quite pleased with yourself and your reputation,” Bucklenott explained, “which I only can imagine includes your scar.”
“My scar?” Harry asked anxiously.
“Yes, Potter, your scar,” Bucklenott smirked. “The famous image you’ve got is obviously of great importance to you. A great deal of this fame is thanks to your scar, therefore I think you would be just distraught if that scar was to disappear…”
“That’s all you’ve got?” Harry grinned. “This scar was touched by a curse, and an evil curse that is! You can’t just make it disappear.”
“Oh, yes, I can,” Bucklenott smirked, “if I cover it up with a tattoo.”
Harry looked completely horror-struck. “A tattoo?! No, this is my trademark! Everyone has to have a trademark! For Draco Malfoy it’s the smirk, for Ron it’s the red hair and freckles, for Dumbledore it’s the white beard and half-moon spectacles, for Arnold Swarzenegger it’s the huge muscles, which are too big in my opinion, but we can discuss that another day… My point is that you can’t do it. You just can’t. Take Jennifer Lopez, for example. If you took away her butt there would be nothing left! Only a woman with no singing voice and extremely bad taste in men! My scar is a restricted area “ No tattoos allowed!”
“Oh, come on, Potter,” Bucklenott laughed. “Wouldn’t it be just wonderful to have Hello Kitty on your forehead?”
“NOOO!”
“That was just too cool,” Ron exclaimed. Him and Voldemort were walking towards the Great Hall for dinner. Their Muggle Studies class had finished not long ago and they had just dropped their bags off in their dormitory to go to dinner. “The Muggles don’t know about the Wizarding world but they made a film where some chick-”
“Woman.”
“Sorry, Harry,” Ron corrected himself after Voldemort’s input, “…some woman can do magic by snapping her fingers!”
“It was lame,” Voldemort huffed. The truth was though, that he had really enjoyed the film. But if he admitted that, he would break down a great deal of that Dark And Extremely Cruel Wizard image he had going. Of course Ron would just think it was Harry, so no one would have to know, but he would and he couldn’t fulfil his master plan if stupid Muggle stuff clouded his mind.
“No, it wasn’t,” Ron replied with furrowed eyebrows. “I know you didn’t think it was because you were laughing your head off when Poppins won the Derby instead of all those cartoon characters.”
“That was because they were lame,” Voldemort responded childishly.
“Whatever, Harry,” Ron dismissed the subject and sat down next to Hermione at dinner.
Fleur had left in the afternoon, so it was just the three of them left. Voldemort ate quickly; he wanted to get back to the common room before anyone else, so he could contact his servants and see whether or not they had managed to get information on where Harry’s Invisibility Cloak was. When Ron and Hermione asked why he was eating so fast, he just told them he needed to borrow some books for his Muggle Studies essay before Madam Pince locked the library doors.
Bolting through the portrait hole, Voldemort hurriedly made sure no one was in the common room and then proceeded to the fireplace. He stuck his head into the fire, let go of a handful of Floo Powder and said clearly, “Drawing room, the Riddle House, Little Hangleton.”
Almost momentarily the dark room of the Riddle House appeared in front of him. He saw that Bucklenott had stepped into the cage where Harry was now bound to a chair. Bucklenott seemed to be holding some sort of vibrating needle and was approaching a shaking Harry.
“What are you doing?” Voldemort asked slowly. He didn’t want to yell it out because Bucklenott was definitely not doing anything wrong and he didn’t want him to stop whatever he was doing because it definitely had an effect on Harry.
Bucklenott looked over at the fireplace and bowed when he saw Voldemort. “My lord, I am threatening the boy.”
“By doing what?” Voldemort asked curiously, giving the needle-thingy an interested look.
“Long story,” Bucklenott sighed.
“All right, do continue,” Voldemort replied with a nod.
He watched as Bucklenott approached Harry further. The needle was mere inches from his forehead now and Harry was biding his lip, shaking.
“All right!” Harry yelled. “Stop! I’ll tell you, I’ll tell you! Just… turn it off!”
Bucklenott smirked and turned off the needle-thingy that Voldemort still didn’t know what was. Probably some sort of torturing weapon from the eighteenth century, he thought.
“Good,” Bucklenott said. “Now, Potter, tell me where your Invisibility Cloak is.”
“You’re standing on it,” Harry answered almost inaudible.
“I’m standing on it?” Bucklenott snorted.
“Yes, it’s invisible, isn’t it?!” Harry retorted. “I spread it out on the cage floor.”
Bucklenott took a few steps back and squatted down. He felt for the Cloak with his hands across the wooden floor. Voldemort watched with glee as Bucklenott raised his hands again, apparently holding something, though invisible.
“You got it?” Voldemort asked.
“Got it,” Bucklenott smirked. He flipped it over in his hands and the Cloak reappeared in his grasp.
“Perfect,” Voldemort breathed. “Congratulations, Bucklenott. You’ve done well. Excellent torturing method. Perhaps a promotion is in order? I think you will serve me well as Deputy Evil Man.”
“Thank you, my lord!” Bucklenott smiled, and bowed twice.
“Yes, yes, don’t get all teary-eyed,” Voldemort replied moodily, “It’s not like it means anything “ you’re still in the same place in the Hierarchy of Evil, now you just have a title.”
“Oh,” Bucklenott looked temporarily disappointed but knew better than to disagree with his master.
“You will send that Cloak to me asap!” Voldemort instructed. “Don’t send it with the morning post, since people would think it quite strange I got a letter saying it’s to Lord Voldemort. Make it arrive at the Astronomy Tower at night. Tonight.”
“Consider it done,” Bucklenott nodded.
“Done? Already? But you’ve still got the Cloak in your hand! Oh, no, you haven’t sent me an empty parcel, have you?!”
“It’s just a phrase, my lord,” Bucklenott assured him.
“Muggle?”
“No, it’s just common knowledge.”
“Don’t mock me!”
As Hermione and Ron entered the common room, Hermione saw Harry squatted down next to the fireplace. “Harry, what are you doing on the ground?” she asked.
“Er… doing push-ups,” Harry replied.
“Just after dinner?” Hermione cocked an eyebrow.
“Good observation,” Harry smirked.
Hermione pursed her lips and sat down on the couch, crossing her arms. Ron followed her and sat down next to her, and Harry positioned himself in the armchair opposite them.
Hermione drummed her fingers on her crossed arms and then broke the silence, “Isn’t this nice? The three of us sitting comfortably with a whole night available for a good, long, substantial conversation?”
Harry and Ron didn’t seem keen to answer. Silence erupted for a while then Ron exclaimed, “Anyone up for a game of Wizard Chess?”
“Yeah!” Harry answered in a hurry.
Hermione looked quite offended, “Hey!”
After two games of Wizard Chess “ halfway through the first one, Hermione left for an early night “ Voldemort checked his wrist watch and saw it was eight thirty. His parcel would arrive at nine o’clock.
“Erm, I have to go, Ron,” he announced.
“Why?” Ron asked.
“I… I have a date.”
“On a school night?”
“Yes.”
“Just after Fleur left you?”
“Yes.”
“At eight thirty when you have to be home before curfew which gives you approximately half an hour?”
“Yes.”
“Is it someone hot?”
“Yes.”
“Is it a boy?”
“Yes. I’m mean no! You tricked me!”
Ron laughed, “All right, Harry, just go.”
Voldemort grinned and left for the Astronomy Tower. He arrived fifteen minutes later and walked over to the edge enjoying the fantastic view of the lake and the forest in the silver moonlight. Not long after, he heard the sound of wings and a soft ‘coo’. Looking up, he saw a large Eagle owl fly in his direction. It landed softly on the edge and beamed at Voldemort for having delivered its parcel to the right person.
Voldemort took the parcel from it and it immediately took off. Voldemort flipped the parcel over and saw Bucklenott tortuous handwriting,
He Who Must Not Be Named
The Astronomy Tower
Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry
England
Europe
The Earth
The Milky Way
“Ha! It’s not only Dumbledore who can be precise when addressing people,” Voldemort said to himself.
He pocketed the parcel and headed for Gryffindor tower and his bed. Tomorrow he would go undercover and find out all of Dumbledore’s secrets.
Harry woke up at the sound of a knocking of the window. He put on his borrowed pair of square, turquoise glasses and saw the large Eagle owl that Bucklenott had sent off the previous day had returned. Harry, being still locked up in the cage, could not go and open the window.
Lucius appeared from behind the northern door, apparently aware of the return of the owl. He opened the window and let the owl fly inside, saying, “Good, girl.”
The owl flew out of the northern door that Lucius had left open, and Lucius proceeded to Harry’s cage. When he was just outside it, he asked, “Ready for a rematch?”
“Of what?” Harry asked dully.
“Twister, of course!”
“Look, Mr. Malfoy,” Harry sighed. “we already know I’m better at it than you are. I won just yesterday. Do you really want to be humiliated once again?”
“You did not win,” Lucius spat. “I was startled by the sudden appearance of my master.”
“Excuses, excuses…” Harry shook his head.
“It is not an excuse!” Lucius fumed. “I could have won! I would have won had it not been for the disturbing ‘pop’ the fireplace makes when someone’s head appears!”
“Excuses, excuses…” Harry repeated.
“If you say ‘excuses’ one more time I will make you suffer so much your parents will turn in their graves!”
“DON’T TALK ABOUT MY PARENTS!” Harry roared, now on his feet.
“Ooh, touched a nerve, did I?”
Harry didn’t respond. He was breathing heavily and trying his very best not to cry.
“Then I think a rematch is in order,” Lucius smirked.
Voldemort exhaled happily when his last class of the day finished. The day he had gone to Snape to make him understand that he was Voldemort in disguise, “ that conversation did not turn out as he planned “ Snape had given him detention, and therefore Voldemort was now on his way to find Snape and set a date and time.
He found Snape talking in hushed voices with Dumbledore in an alcove. Voldemort slowly drew closer, acting as if he his ears weren’t doing their best to extend and catch whatever they were talking about.
“…secret meeting,” Snape was saying.
“Come to my office at seven tonight, Severus,” Dumbledore replied.
“Very well,” Snape nodded.
Dumbledore walked off down the hall and Voldemort now proceeded towards Snape. Ha! Dumbledore’s office at seven. This is going to be interesting. I’ll sneak along under the Cloak and get this secret information!
“Hello, Potter,” Snape greeted icily. “Your detention.”
“That was exactly what I came to talk to you about, Professor,” Voldemort relied, smiling.
“Good,” Snape replied. “Tomorrow evening eight o’clock sharp. My office.”
“Very well, Professor,” Voldemort nodded and left down the hall.
“Right hand, blue.”
Lucius placed his right hand eagerly on the best blue dot.
“Malfoy, get your hand away from my butt!” Harry yelled in disgust.
“Wow, total déjà vu!” Bucklenott exclaimed.
Harry cocked an eyebrow. He really didn’t want to think about that revelation any further, so he hurriedly said, “Spin the arrow!”
“Oh, right,” Bucklenott blushed. He spun the arrow and then announced, “Potter, left foot, green.”
Harry placed his left foot roughly on a green dot near Lucius, causing him to almost lose his balance.
“You’re cheating!” Lucius hissed after he had managed his footing.
“Am not.”
“Are too.”
“Am not.”
“Quit it!” Bucklenott roared. “Lucius, right foot, blue.”
Voldemort was moving silently through the corridors. He remembered from his school days where Dumbledore’s office was. He had never had an Invisibility Cloak before and therefore found it extremely intriguing to be covered by one now and doing merciless sneaking.
He came to the gargoyle only seconds before Snape did. He positioned himself to the side, so Snape could stand right in front of the stone statue and say the password as he did not know it himself.
“A layered chocolate cake with coffee cream,” Snape uttered and the gargoyle sprang to life. Snape stepped onto the rotating staircase and Voldemort hurriedly followed. When Voldemort stepped up behind Snape he suddenly lost his footing and fell to the stone stairs.
“Who’s there?” Snape asked with narrowed eyes.
“No one,” Voldemort answered.
“Phew,” Snape breathed. He stepped off the staircase and knocked twice on Dumbledore’s office door.
“Come in,” Dumbledore’s voice came from behind the door.
Snape opened it and stepped inside. Voldemort slipped past him just as Dumbledore said, “Close the door, Severus.”
Snape obeyed and then positioned himself in front of Dumbledore’s desk. Voldemort watched eagerly, awaiting the incredibly secret information he was about to ruthlessly steal.
“Are you sure about this?” Dumbledore asked.
“Yes,” Snape answered.
“Very well,” Dumbledore nodded. “Repeat after me: Do Re Me Far So La Ti.”
“Do Re Me Far So La Ti,” Snape sang along.
“You need to work on your vocals, Severus,” Dumbledore instructed. “And make the ‘Ti’ last longer.”
“Do Re Me Far So La Tiiiiiii,” Snape repeated now more clearly.
“Excellent,” Dumbledore smiled. “I do believe you have a great chance of getting into the Weird Sisters.”
Snape smiled proudly and Dumbledore continued, “Well, you can go again. You don’t need further instructions. Good luck with the audition.”
“Thank you, Headmaster,” Snape smiled and walked out of the office, Voldemort slipping soundlessly out of the door behind him.
Voldemort was in a very bad mood that night when he was trying to sleep. He had got absolutely no information whatsoever. How did they imagine he could gain control over the whole world when singing lessons were all the Bright Side possessed?
He would just have to keep looking out for anything he could use against them.