Over the next few weeks the rumors began to spread throughout the castle about McGonagall's stomach ailment. It became all to obvious to her students that something was going on with her, as her stomach seemed to be bulging ever so slightly with every passing day.

Harry and Ron took their seats in their morning Transfiguration class, noting the foul look on McGonagall's face that suggested the first person to bring up her stomach problem would be hung from their ankles in the dungeons. She didn't look like she was gaining weight other than in her stomach, which was obviously expanding and bulging. Harry was certain he saw one of the bulges move ever so slightly.

"What do you reckon is wrong with her?"Ron whispered to Harry once the class had begun.

"I don't know, she almost looks pregnant,"Harry said, though unwilling to believe it.

"Pregnant? She's older than dirt!"Ron hissed in Harry's ear. Harry shrugged. He had other things to think about.

He and Draco had cooled it since discovering the elderly couple locked up in a cage in the school dungeons by Moaning Myrtle, but he knew it was driving Draco crazy. It was driving him a bit crazy, truthfully, and he knew he needed to get together with Draco again soon. Also, he'd been having Dobby the house-elf take Olive and Roger meals three times a day, but he knew he couldn't let Myrtle's dastardly plan continue on. He was wondering if he should just bite the bullet and go tell Dumbledore everything. In the meantime, he and Ron had been going to see Hermione in the hospital wing whenever they had a free moment, but Harry was fairly certain Hermione was rather annoyed by their infrequent visits and the fact Ron didn't want to seem to talk about the fact that Hermione's his sister, pregnant with his unborn child, and that her head could explode at any moment.

With all of this going on along with the rumors about McGonagall and the increasingly uncomfortable Health classes with Professor Persephone, Harry was starting to think fighting Lord Voldemort again might actually be preferable.

Down in the dungeons, Professor Snape's Newt-Level potions class was commencing. He stalked out of his office into the dank classroom and looked over the students in his class.

"First of all, I would like everyone to turn in their homework from last night. You either have it or you fail. No excuses,"Snape said unpleasantly, walking between the tables collecting rolls of parchment. There was a sudden shriek from somewhere in the dungeons.

"What was that?"Snape demanded. The class looked befuddled. Well, in Snape's opinion, they usually looked befuddled, but now they seemed especially so. "What was that sound?"

Suddenly, there was another shriek, this time obviously a woman was yelling.

"Somebody help us! Get us out of this filthy dungeon!"a woman's voice echoed through the corridors. Most of the class turned to look out the door. Snape's brow furrowed. "Help! Something's wrong with my husband, he needs help!"

"If anybody moves from their seats while I'm gone you will all get detention for a month," Snape hissed, moving towards the door. The class watched, fascinated, as Snape leaned out through the doorway, looking down both sides of the corridor.

"Somebody! Anybody! We need some bloody help down here!!"the woman bellowed. Snape moved slowly down the corridor, removing his wand and holding it ready. He briefly investigated the few chambers off the corridor nearby and determined they were empty.

"Get us the hell out of this bloody cage!!"the woman barked, and Snape then knew that the voice was coming from the old torture chamber. He did not, however, know what was going on, and that really pissed him off.

After a long and uncomfortable Transfiguration lesson, McGonagall finally excused the class and hurried to her office. Harry and Ron now had a free period.

"Shall we go visit Hermione again?"Ron suggested.

"Yes, I suppose we should,"Harry said defeatedly. Truthfully, what he wanted to do was go find Draco, but he knew that would probably only lead to more trouble. Not to mention, an angry complaint from Hermione for not caring enough about her health and well-being to visit her more often.

"Maybe if we brought our books with us she'd help us with our homework,"Ron said.

"Ron! She's not to have any stress, she's pregnant, and her head could explode at any moment. I don't think having her help us with our homework would be in the best interest of her health,"Harry said, amazed at Ron's complete idiocy.

"Well, we can at least work on our homework while we're visiting,"Ron said. "Where are your books?" Harry looked around, puzzled. Then realization dawned.

"Oh no, I left them in Persephone's class...."Harry lamented. "You head on up, I'll run and get my books. I promise I'll meet you up there this time."

Ron looked skeptical, but nodded and hurried off towards the hospital wing while Harry hurried down towards Persephone's class.

When Harry reached the classroom, he spotted his books up near the front. Hurrying between the desks, he looked up towards Persephone's office and saw Professor Persephone sitting at her desk. She was shaving.

"Oh! Er, ah, Mr. Potter!"Professor Persephone suddenly said as she spotted her student steadily staring. "I...um...."

"Oh come off it, I know you're not a woman. Look, you don't even have your wig on!"Harry said irritably. He was not in the mood for this ridiculous teacher right now. Then something caught his eye and he looked back up at Professor Persephone. There was something familiar about that man pretending to be a woman. "Who are you?"

Professor Persephone wiped off the shaving cream and make-up.

"Harry, it's me,"she/he said quietly.

".....Sirius?"Harry whispered, his eyes widening...

Over in the hospital wing, Ron sat awkwardly tried to make small-talk with Hermione.

"So, er, how are things?"Ron asked, standing next to Hermione's bed.

"Simply grand, Ron, thank you so much for asking,"Hermione said icily. "Your mum got into a drunken brawl with my mum and Madame Pomfrey had to chase our parents off to Hogsmeade. Then the next morning, we discovered this delightful little bulge on the back of my head. How are things with you?"

"What do you mean, drunken brawl?"Ron asked, bewildered.

"Apparently your mum has taking up drinking....quite heavily. She could barely stand upright. She's also quite upset with Mr. Weasley for having had that affair with my mother, and called mum a 'harlot,' just before attacking her like a crazy person."

Ron was stunned. He had no idea what to even say to that. He decided to sit down on the bed next to her, his mind reeling from this current turn of events.

"Where is Harry? He promised me he be up here as soon as he got his books! I should've known better than to fall for that one again,"Ron muttered, mostly for lack of anything better to say.

"Ron, have you realized your going to be the father of your nephew here soon? Don't you think we should probably talk about that?"Hermione asked.

"I have been trying to avoid that particular discussion,"Ron said nervously. "I mean, I'm only fifteen, and I've just discovered the girl I like is my sister and she's pregnant with my child. Oh, and her head might explode. I really don't know what I'm suppose to do or think about any of it"

"You're right, Ron. It's all my fault, and I shouldn't be hassling you about it. It's just that you might end up a single parent before this school year's over,"Hermione said sadly.

"Hermione, technically I'll be a single parent either way, as we're brother and sister and can't marry anyway,"Ron said gruffly.

"Right. Good point....."Hermione said. They were silent for a few moments.

"How have you been feeling?"Ron asked, concerned.

"A lot better now that your hysterical drunken mother is gone. Mum and Dad have been in periodically to visit, and Arthur's been visiting, but he's made your mother stay in their room at the Hog's Head. I can feel the baby moving around a bit sometimes,"Hermione said. "My brain feels like it's moving around occasionally, also. That isn't nearly as fun."

"Isn't there anything else Madame Pomfrey can do?"Ron asked.

"She did say if I get any more bulges that there's a spell she can do that will entirely encase my head in cement,"Hermione said glumly.

"Well, that'd certainly keep your head from exploding. Be a bit hard to breathe, though."

"Yes. I imagine it would."

Down in the dungeons, Snape stepped into the torture chamber and spotted Olive and Roger hanging from the giant rusty cage, while Peeves the poltergeist flew around the top of the cage gleefully, throwing pebbles at Olive.

"Oh sir! Sir! You have to help us! We've been locked in this awful cage and that horrible little ghost won't leave us alone! Roger's passed out and I don't know what's the matter with him! Please get us out of here!,"Olive shrieked as soon as she saw Snape enter the room.

"PEEVES! OUT!"Snape shouted. Peeves dashed through the stone wall and disappeared. "Now, who are you and how did you get trapped down here?"

"I'm Olive Newton and this is my husband Roger. This dead girl named Myrtle that I went to school with managed to pay some ruffians to bring us here and lock us in this cage by blackmailing one of your students! Please, sir, let us out of here. My poor husband!"Olive babbled hysterically, holding on to Roger's arm.

"Let me see what I can do,"Professor Snape said, examining the cage, looking for a lock. There didn't seem to be a lock on it at all, or any way to open it.

There was suddenly a loud crack, and Mundungus Fletcher suddenly apparated in the middle of the room, who was joined immediately by a very angry Myrtle zooming out of the wall behind him.

"Get away from that cage!"Myrtle snarled. Snape scowled.

"Mundungus, I should have know you'd be involved in this foolishness,"Snape said, but before he could do anything, Mundungus had whipped out his wand.

"Petrificus Totalus!"he yelled, and a jet of light shot out of his wand, hitting Snape in the chest and immobilizing him completely. He fell over onto the floor with a dull thud.

"Mundungus?"Myrtle said sweetly, scowling at Olive. "Chain Snape to the wall, then go over there and poke Olive's husband with a stick. See what's wrong with him. I've got things I need to do..."

Back in Snape's classroom, all his students sat stiffly in their seats staring at the clock. They had heard the yelling, but weren't sure what was going on. Finally someone spoke up.

"Class ended ten minutes ago. I don't think Professor Snape intended us to stay even after the class was over,"a boy said. There were several people nodding in agreement to this, and soon, very bravely, the students made their way quickly out of the dungeons. No one was really concerned about what might have happened to Snape.

In Persephone's office, Harry's mind was reeling from this newest shock.

"I thought you were dead,"Harry said suspiciously, sitting down in front of the desk. "Everyone saw you die."

"Actually, nobody saw me die. Everybody saw me fall through a curtain! Why does everyone seem to think that falling through a curtain is fatal?"Sirius said. Harry mulled this over.

"Well then where have you been? If you've been alive all this time why have you gone on letting everyone think your dead?"Harry asked, suddenly angry.

"I figured if Voldemort thought I was dead, we'd have an advantage over him,"Sirius said.

"That doesn't make any sense whatsoever,"Harry said. "And besides, why wouldn't you at least tell me, your own godson?" Sirius seemed to think about this one before he answered.

"It was too dangerous, Harry, But that's why I came back to Hogwart's in disguise, so I could keep an eye on you! You're in terrible danger!"

"You mean more than usual?"Harry asked.

"Yes, considerably more than usual. That's why I've been masquerading as a teacher,"Sirius replied.

"Alright, then, what's the problem?"Harry asked. Sirius seemed puzzled.

"The problem with what?"he asked.

"What is this terrible danger I'm in?!"Harry asked angrily. Sirius still seemed puzzled.

"I..er...well, you see....I can't tell you,"he finally said.

"Why not?"

"Er....because...then you'd be in even more danger,"Sirius replied.

"Once again, that doesn't make any sense."

"Tell me, Harry, seen much of Draco Malfoy lately?"Sirius said. Harry was startled.

"What do you mean?"Harry asked.

"Ah. Just as I thought. Is there something going on between you two?"

"What, did you come back from the dead to berate me for having a gay love affair?"Harry asked..

"No, I'm trying to warn you, Harry,"Sirius said seriously.

"Well you're not doing a very good job of it! Warn me about what?"

"Harry, I-"

Suddenly, an echoing scream shattered the silence, coming from the Transfiguration corridor. Harry and Sirius jumped up and ran into the hall as another scream bellowed down the hallway, and Harry realized it was Professor McGonagall....