Sweat seemed to pour down James Potter’s forehead as he rounded the corner towards his starting point. It was all up to him now. No one else but himself was able to get this far, something he was extremely proud of- too proud of sometimes. Maybe that was something he should have considered before he’d gotten involved in this. He flinched, letting the feelings of shame wash over him and let them go.
All he had to do was get through this last task. It was his burden and he was willing to take it all the way. James placed himself in starting position and tried to wipe some of the sweat off his forehead. Dimly he could see the stadium in the background behind him, his fans whispering excitedly and waiting impatiently for the starting flare. A hush came over the crowd when Dumbledore raised his wand. James counted silently in his head, not aware of the other boys standing beside him, wanting this glory as much as he did.
One.
Time was slowing down, turning the world around him blurry as everyone mouthed the numbers together.
Two.
James lost his focus for a split second, moving his eyes away from the finish line and towards the Quiddich stadium seats. He could see Sirius, Peter, and Remus beaming proudly from the first row. Instead of making his eyes come back to his goal, he stopped to search for a certain redhead who should have been sitting anywhere around the other marauders, smiling broadly, her mind only thinking of how fit he was and how much she didn’t deserve him.
Three.
He wasn’t ready for the red flare coming from the wand, bursting into the air with a hundred sparks moving along with it. He was able to make his foot move to begin running, but instantly the other runners were strides ahead of him and he suddenly knew there was no way for him to try to catch up.
Then there was the road block. It was only in his lane, never in the others and was too large to jump over. It was Lily.
Her face was contorted into rage, turning bright red. “You think you’re all that, James Potter? Take a look at yourself in the mirror! Maybe it could do you some good!” she hissed, throwing a hand mirror at him and narrowly missing his face. James caught it, falling backwards.
He expected to hit the hard ground on the field and have the wind knocked out of him, but instead he landed on his bed in his, Sirius’, Peter’s, and Remus’ dormitory. He was still holding the mirror. Cautiously he turned it over, letting the reflected side lean face up on his bed. It reflected the ceiling, but nothing else.
James was too scared to look. Anything Lily told him to do must have serious repercussions. Gathering up his courage, he held it up to his face, which had suddenly become Sirius.
“James, you shouldn’t do anything you might regret,” The mirror-Sirius told him, a smirk on his face in typical Sirius fashion. “You should leave Lily to me. She’s never liked you anyways.” James threw the mirror at the wall, enjoying the shattered glass and the destruction of Sirius’ words. Now, though, it was coming right at his face. He could feel the sharp glass tearing at his skin and watched his own blood flow from the wounds.
There was no pain. He could feel nothing at all, not even the tears rolling down his cheeks. There was nothing there until Lily stepped in front of him. He wasn’t sitting on his bed anymore. The room was blank, completely white, making it look as if it went on for eternity.
She was smiling, walking toward him in a way that made his heart clatter against his chest. He was suddenly aware that his face was bloody and that he couldn’t feel his it. For almost a minute James swore Lily was about to kiss him. Her hands were gently on his face and when she touched him every bleeding gash healed.
Her hands moved to his chest and she smiled even wider. James could feel himself smiling too, but it suddenly turned into an expression of pain when her nails began to dig into him.
James cried out as Lily’s nails dug deeper into his flesh. Within seconds she had a hold of his heart, ripping every vein from it, letting him hear every pop. When the red thing finally came out of his chest she surveyed it, a little glimmer of amusement in her eyes.
“Funny,” she whispered as James began to writhe on the ground. “I didn’t think you had one of these.” She glanced at it again before dropping it to the ground and stepping on it. “Guess you don’t need it anyways, right Jamesie?”
James Potter sat bolt upright in his bed, soaked through to the bone with sweat. It was still dark outside the window. The others were asleep and James could hear Sirius’ snoring from across the room. Panting heavily, he swung off the bed and stumbled into the bathroom.
The light blinded him for a moment before he caught sight of himself in the mirror. Thank goodness he didn’t look a thing like Sirius. There were no scars, either. His heart was obviously beating, so apparently he had nothing left to worry about.
Except what he had done to Lily. Merlin, she was never going to forgive him after when he had done now.
It was his brainless stupidity by the lake after exams yesterday. It was just a bad day, that’s all. Well, that and the fact that his ego was even more swollen than normal, that he was stressed out from the exams, that he only had one more chance to get Lily to like him before the summer, and…well…he could blame it on the musing that the planets weren’t in line that day, but it still didn’t change that Lily was going to hate him forever.
He suddenly caught sight of something in the mirror. He had a red scar under his chin.
“What’re you so nervous about, Jamesie-Poo?” Sirius Black glanced at his best friend who kept staring out the window of Hogwarts train at Hogsmeade platform every six seconds. “Lily won’t hate you for forever.”
“Just for eternity,” Remus said without taking his eyes off of his book. Peter laughed uproariously at the joke. The others looked at him with their eyebrows raised. His laugher stopped instantly.
Sirius rolled his eyes and turned back to the problem at hand. “Anyway, it’s not as if we did anything new to Snivellus yesterday.” He pointed out, pulling out his wand and flicking it through the air, miming James taking off Snape’s pants in front of everyone.
“Admit it,” he showed his infamous grin that he only used when he was certain that he was right. “You enjoy showing off in front of Lily just a little too much,” He paused to make sure James was listening to him, already knowing that he had the other’s attention. “And it’s not just the fact that Lily’s watching; it’s that everyone else is too.”
Remus gave Sirius a look and then checked the title of his book, Magic Psychology to Use on Your Friends! “That’s it,” he sighed, throwing the book into a bag that sat next to him. “I’m never letting you borrow one of my books again, Padfoot.”
James ignored them all. The only reason he had gotten on the train so early was to make sure that he caught Lily before she avoided him for the rest of the summer. Without thinking, he rubbed his chin where the mysterious scar was, giving the impression that he was thinking very hard. In fact, the only thing he was wondering was if he happened to catch a glimpse of red hair flying in between the other kids lolling about the train platform.
He was so close to the window now that his nose was pressed against it, leaving a slightly greasy mark. It reminded him even more of what they had done yesterday. James’ eyes were beginning to hurt as he continued to stare. Just as he thought he saw Lily, he was suddenly aware that the compartment was eerily silent. Slowly he turned his head around and saw that Sirius and Remus weren’t there anymore and Peter was sitting casually with a magazine in his hands.
“Where are Remus and Sirius?” he asked Peter suspiciously. Peter looked up nervously and James could almost see the lie trying to form in his head.
“R-Remus?” he stuttered, his eyes bouncing around the room, trying not look directly into James’ eyes. “I…uh…think he mentioned something about finding some chocolate…” Peter quickly turned back to his magazine and pretended to be very interested in an article about Herbology.
“And you expect me to believe that Sirius followed him like a good puppy?” James asked, knowing exactly where Sirius most likely was.
“Um…er…uh…” Peter’s hands were visibly shaking, scared that he was going to get in trouble with Sirius or James.
James stood up, half smiling. “Don’t worry. I’m a resourceful chap; I think I know where to find him.” In a couple of strides, he reached the compartment door, but right as he reached it, it opened for him.
Lily stood in the doorway, arms folded across her chest, her red hair gleaming in the morning light. The only motor function that James could control was his mouth, which instantly dropped at the sight of her. She was still mad at him, obviously.
“Sirius said you wanted to tell me something?” Lily inquired, gently raising an eyebrow, succeeding in making her look even more imposing. James’ eyes swiftly glanced behind her and promised silently to kill Sirius later. Sirius just waved carelessly at him. “Potter?” she asked sharply, jolting him out of imagining himself dismembering Padfoot.
James swallowed hard and tried to speak without looking as if he were totally scared of her at this moment. “Yeah, I guess,” he squeaked, then righted his voice back to the land of puberty. There was a silence in which Sirius coughed loudly from the corridor, trying to help by making hand gestures to tell James what to say.
“My…my parents…uh…are…inviting?” Sirius got distracted and began to make puppet shadows in the sunlight streaming into the hallway. James gave Sirius a look to tell him to stop goofing off and give him a real answer Lily would believe.
“Inviting me?” Now she was really confused. “To what, pray tell; a let’s-beat-up-Severus-Snape-party?”
“Actually, that wouldn’t be such a bad idea…” Sirius thought aloud. Remus, who was standing beside him holding some chocolate, elbowed him in the ribs.
James took the lie into his own hands while Sirius dreamed of a place that only existed in his mind. “My parents are inviting your whole family to go with us on our tour of the world this summer.” He quickly spat out, thinking suddenly of the trip that his parents were taking for their anniversary.
Lily looked surprised, to say the least. For once she let her guard down and uncrossed her arms. “I…I guess I’ll have to ask mum and dad,” she said unexpectedly, surprising even herself. With that, she glanced quickly at his face and turned silently down the hallway.
James’ ego got the best of him. “Oh, and Lily?” he called after her, sticking his head of the door to make sure she heard him. “We’re going muggle-style, so maybe we’ll even get to share a room at one of those things you call hotels?” Lily’s face burned with anger and embarrassment. She opened her mouth to tell him off, thought seriously of hexing him in the hallway, and finally decided to stomp off angrily in the other direction.
“One step forward and two steps back…” Remus muttered as he walked back into the room in front of Sirius.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” James roared slamming the door shut before Sirius had a chance to walk in.
“Nothing,” Remus said nonchalantly, sitting back down to pick up yet another book he magically pulled from inside his robes.
“Hello?” Sirius called from out in the hall, but everyone ignored him. “Uh…The dog’s still in the corridor…” he gently rapped on the door, but no one moved to open it. There was the sound of him shaking the handle, but James pointed his wand at it before it had the chance to open.
“Moony…” James threatened, turning back around and narrowing his eyes.
Remus sighed and barely looked up from his book. “I only meant that you never let Lily stay happy with you.” James’ eyes instantly went huge and round.
“What does THAT supposed to mean?”
“Why is the door locked on the outside, anyway?” Sirius wondered, pulling as hard as he could on the door. “It opened for Lily, for Merlin’s sake…why is it less than five minutes later it won’t open for Padfoot?”
“SHUT UP, PADFOOT!” James roared from the inside. Merlin, he’s not bright. It’s a wonder he even passed his exams.
An hour later, Sirius was still sitting outside, bouncing spells off of the window, trying to hit the Slytherins in the car next to them.
Sirius sighed. “It’s gonna be a long summer…”