Chapter 18: Meetings of the Damned
The weights that had been placed on her feet seemed to become ten times heavier, and the noise of the storm outside was drowned out by the rushing sound that filled her ears.
The Death Eater moved behind her once again and gave her a rough shove. “Go.”
With the knowledge that fear and exhaustion filled her eyes, which were a dark, forest green with malnutrition, Lily slowly crossed the threshold and stepped into the room.
It surprised her to find it small and little more decent than the one she’d been staying in. There was a window in this one, a rather large one placed in the left wall. Through it she could see the storm, but anything past that was blurred. She’d figured a while ago that it was safe to assume she wasn’t anywhere near Hogwarts, nor was she anywhere near any sort of help.
Other than herself and her escort, the only other presence was in a chair at the front of the room, sitting proudly as if he were a king upon a throne. His skin seemed to be paler, his eyes redder, and his atmosphere more ominous than it had been at Christmas.
The room smelled of madness, of evil and of blood. Though Lily could see none of the third, she had no doubt that at some point it had been spilled, carelessly. And then had been ruthlessly cleaned up.
Voldemort rose as she carefully moved to stand wilted before him. Lily wondered if by doing so he was simply humoring the niceties. The Death Eater shut the door and stood next to it, ready to ward off visitors or interruptions if need be.
“Dear Lily, how nice of you to come and visit me. So far from home, so far from hearth.” A taunting, somehow triumphant gleam sparkled in his unblinking gaze; his cold, high voice”besides making her wonder ridiculously if he was a eunuch”held a trace of amusement.
“Miss Evans if you will, sir,” Lily said stiffly with all the dignity she could muster.
“Miss Evans.” Voldemort grinned a bit as he gingerly reseated himself. “Quite right, the formalities must be observed no matter the circumstances, as I’m sure we were mutually raised. You shall call me Lord Voldemort.”
She bit back a retort that denied having anything in common with a murderer that obviously had a severe case of psychosis. Her mother had, in fact, beaten old-fashioned manners into her if nothing else. She vaguely thought how silly it sounded talking about formalities when she was probably about to die, or if not, will in the near future.
“Now, Miss Evans,” he began as he shifted into a more comfortable position in his sad little chair, “you know, of course, why you’re here, being such an intelligent creature.”
“If you would be so kind as to humor me, Lord Voldemort sir.”
Voldemort simply narrowed his eyes at her witty reply. He rose again to pace the room, his long black robes swishing around his feet in a strangely elegant way.
Lily, in fact, did not know why she was here. She knew it was obvious that he most likely wanted something of her, but what, exactly, she couldn’t say.
“You’re here, Miss Evans, because I have a proposition to present to you. You will listen to all it entails, and there will be no negotiating. Whether you accept it, or your other option, is entirely your choice.”
He glanced back at her to make sure she was listening. Seeing with satisfaction that she was rather intently, he continued as he turned about the room.
“I’m giving you the chance and decision to join me. You will be appointed and recognized as my right hand man”or woman, rather”and you will be the most important asset to my ranks. You’ll do what you’re told, but will only have to answer to me. You will be my assistant, and will take on the duties entrusted to one.
“By becoming this you will have to severe all your ties to Albus Dumbledore, and to James Potter, and anyone else that is not of my alliance. You will learn to hate them, to wish ill of them, even pray for their deaths.
“You will also become my personal whore, and will share my bed. Willingly or not.”
Well, that answered whether or not he was a eunuch.
He said it all rather quickly, and that only made it harder for Lily’s shock-frozen mind to register.
Voldemort restlessly continued to prowl the room, anticipating her reply. The Death Eater standing guard by the door looked on distantly, all but screaming boredom.
After several minutes of thorough thought and consideration, Lily quietly asked, though she already knew the answer, “And the other option?”
“Death.”
“I choose the latter,” she decided even before he could finish saying the word.
Though he had known that was the option she would choose, Voldemort whirled on her furiously. “Why? Because you love that Potter bastard? Because you’re loyal to that old baboon, Dumbledore? Answer me this, you good-for-nothing Mudblood, if you love that blood traitor, why did you leave him?”
When she didn’t answer, he pushed his face into hers. She was assaulted by the fowl stench of his breath; she choked and the stench made her eyes water. Voldemort mistook them as symptoms of tears.
“When my last attempt at killing you slowly and painfully with that blasted poison didn’t work, I set about making new plans. And do you know which one got you here tonight, kneeling on my floor, your body bruised with neglect?
“Confronting you directly as I did at Christmas had been a waste of time, as you well know. The grief you must have felt after losing your parents did not eat at you as I had hoped it would. So the day before all the students went back to that God forsaken school, I had one of my very loyal servants perform an Unforgivable on his own daughter. I dare say you may be familiar with her name. Kimberlynn Pierce, a first year Gryffindor.”
Voldemort drew back to stand, staring in the distance in a thoughtful pose. “Her father was deeply ashamed of where the girl’d been Sorted. But some things cannot be avoided,” he waved the matter off.
“How you survived the pain of Excrutio Venenum is beyond me, I will admit. It does not matter now. I have you in front of me, close enough to touch.”
As if to prove it, he stepped forward and softly ran a fingertip down Lily’s waxy cheek. She shivered”his skin was so cold”and jerked her head away.
“I thought long and hard about how to get you to me. I couldn’t very well just run into the Great Hall during breakfast one morning and snatch you. But then I wondered what would happen if I took away your only safeguard? What if I took away what you live for?”
James, he thought with a sudden flicker of panic. Oh, please, let him be all right.
“But I had the same conflict. I couldn’t just go and take him. So how was I supposed to separate you from him?”
“You,” Lily whispered abruptly with a sneer. “You were behind our break-up.”
“Yes,” Voldemort confirmed in a drawl, a wide smile growing on his face. “I’m quite proud of the little play I directed. Do you know who worked behind the scenes?”
Arrogant bastard, she thought. He’s so convinced that I won’t be able to find a way out that he’s assuming that he could tell me the identity of one of his henchmen and I’d never tell.
“Who?”
“Jessica Lynn Fanning herself.”
Lily was surprised she wasn’t surprised. She wasn’t surprised that Jessica was a Death Eater. She wasn’t surprised that Jessica had played the nastiest part in this scheme. She was ashamed to have her in her house, let alone her own dorm.
Voldemort continued, “She was so eager for the part, and I knew she would play it well. And she did. You wouldn’t be here otherwise.”
So James really hadn’t cheated on her, Lily’s mind reeled. He’d merely been a victim. Oh, what has she done?
“But it doesn’t matter. You and Potter would have broken up sooner or later. Who could ever love a Mudblood?”
Don’t listen to him, Lily, she told herself inwardly. Don’t listen to any more of his lies.
“Now.” Voldemort took a deep breath before looking back at her. Funny, he thought. She had Gryffindor hair, but Slytherin eyes. A Ravenclaw mind, and Hufflepuff justice. Interesting. “I’m going to ask you again. Will you become my assistant, my ally, my whore?”
She glared into his eyes. He stared right back. “No,” she said firmly.
“Then you will die.” He snapped his fingers, and the Death Eater at the door came forward. “Take her to her room. No food or water. I’ll deal with her later.”
As she was being dragged from the room, Voldemort looked after her thoughtfully. “Pity.”
Alone and cold in the dark, Lily curled into an aching ball on the hard wooden floor.
She’d ruined everything; it was all her fault. If she hadn’t jumped to conclusions with James, she might have believed the truth and not run away. Instead, she had acted on the wounded impulse to run away. Now look where she was: lying in the dark with certain death hanging over her head. She’ll either die of starvation, of a broken heart, or at the end of Voldemort’s wand. None of which were very appealing, but she wasn’t in the mood for being optimistic.
No one knew where she was. James couldn’t save her this time. Her heart burned painfully at the thought of him.
How could she have ever thought he would cheat on her? It seemed completely absurd now. She felt so stupid.
A mirthless laugh choked out of her throat. And to think she’d thought she’d felt stupid when he’d “cheated” on her, but knowing that the entire thing was made up, she felt even stupider because she hadn’t been able to trust that he loved her.
The sad part was even though she now knew the truth, she didn’t have any way to apologize to him. She wouldn’t ever see him again. She’d die with a lie, and he would forever have to live with one.
She wondered if he would move on. Would he be able to look beyond this year, this traumatic time of his life, and find some other sort of happiness? Or would he forever have a bitter heart, still be so angry at the injustice of their last argument that wherever he would go, he’d have a black storm cloud hovering over his head?
And would he still love her, despite what happens, despite the time that goes by? Through and through?
She hoped so. She hoped he never forgot about her. She hoped that at night, he would hold his wife close while she slept, but remain wide-awake himself, remembering his Lily Evans.
The first tear trailed down her cheek. Because she would never forget him.
Charlie Simmons was in her bed in her dorm, the only one awake. She lay on her stomach, propped up by her elbows, staring down at a picture of she and Lily.
They had been at Charlie’s house the summer before second year. In the picture they were outside on a sunny day, and Lily was trying to teach Charlie how to play the Muggle game football. More often than not, they ended up in a heap on the ground, limbs tangled, the ball rolling away innocently.
As the younger Lily and Charlie laughed and waved up at her, Charlie knuckled away a tear that was making its way down her cheek.
Was Lily thinking of her? she wondered. God knew Charlie never stopped thinking about her. Was she all right? Where was she? What was happening to her? Would she ever see her again?
Was she…gone?
Charlie shut her eyes tight. Whenever she asked herself that, something deep inside her told her that Lily wasn’t dead. Something deep inside her told her not to give up, that giving up on her best friend would only crush everyone’s hopes.
But what if it was false hope, and that there really was no chance for Lily? Don’t think that, Charlie instantly scolded herself. But what if? something in her mind persisted. What if they were searching for nothing? What if Lily didn’t want to be found?
“That’s not true,” Charlie whispered to herself fiercely. “Stop it.”
Suddenly she heard rustling from the other side of the dorm. Quickly and quietly as she could, she stuffed the picture under her pillow and pretended to be asleep.
She heard someone sit up in bed and push the covers back. A robe whispered as someone slipped it on; then feet were softly padding to the door of the dormitory.
Peeking through her eyelids, Charlie saw the long, curly blonde hair that could only be Jessica Fanning’s. Her dorm mate had pulled on a black robe; out of that black robe came a wand, and Charlie watch Jessica place a silencing charm on the door. The blonde slowly pulled it open before quickly stepping out.
Charlie had two seconds to decide whether to follow or not before she was tugging on her own robe and hastily moving toward the door. If she followed Jessica, maybe she could tip off Filch and get the bitch in a couple detentions. It was the least she deserved.
She stepped out into the corridor just as Jessica was descending into the Gryffindor common room. Charlie made sure to be absolutely silent as she hurried over to the seventh year boys’ dormitories. They were the experts on being out late, after all.
Not even bothering to knock”they should be in bed and probably sleeping by now”she unlocked the door and stepped in.
She wasn’t very surprised to see James sitting on the window seat once again, staring out into the night. His head whipped toward her the instant she started across the dorm toward Sirius’s bed.
She flung the covers off her boyfriend as James came over to stand next to her. “What’s happened?” he asked urgently. “Did they find something?”
“No, but we’ve got an opportunity for revenge. Sirius. Sirius, wake up, you flee-inhabited mongrel!”
She shook him roughly until his eyes opened. “What? What?” He sat up and groggily wiped the grit out of the corners of his eyes.
“Get up. We’ve some unfinished business to attend to. Now! Hurry!”
She bent to open the trunk at the foot of his bed and pulled out some clothes, flinging them at him. “Get dressed. James, grab your invisibility cloak. Don’t look so shocked; didn’t you think Lily would have told me?”
At the mention of Lily’s name, there was a very brief moment of melancholy. Then Sirius got up and dressed, and Charlie ushered them toward the door. “Let’s go, before we lose her!”
Soon James was unfolding a silvery cloak and was just about to pull it over the three of them when Sirius started to dig in his pockets. “Oh! Wait! Best leave this here, just in case.”
He pulled out a small mirror; walking to Remus’s bedside table, he placed it there and hurried back to James and Charlie. “You do have yours, don’t you, mate?”
James nodded and covered them in the cloak. Charlie explained as they made their way down and through the common room. “I don’t know if we’ll be able to catch up.”
“We will, don’t worry.” It was James’s turn to search his pockets. He pulled out several lint balls, the leg of a chocolate frog, a golden Snitch”“I’d wondered where that went.””and finally a piece of old parchment.
Still keeping up pace as they wound through corridors, the bespectacled boy touched the tip of his wand to the parchment and said, “I solemnly swear that I am up to no good.”
Charlie glanced back and lifted an eyebrow as she saw a map of Hogwarts paint its way over the parchment.
“Let’s see…ah, there she is. J. Fanning is just leaving the Entrance Hall.”
Sweat broke out on their foreheads as they hurried down the many flights of stairs and across the Hogwarts grounds. They kept track of Jessica on the map.
“Where’s she heading?” Charlie asked James, panting slightly.
His brows knit and he frowned. “The forbidden forest.”
“Why am I surprised?” Charlie mumbled, though she was hadn’t expected this. She’d thought that Jessica would be sneaking out to see her latest boyfriend; what on Earth was she going into the forest for?
“We’re going to have to hurry if we want to keep up; the Marauder’s Map doesn’t reach past the Hogwarts grounds’ boundaries,” James announced as they watched Jessica walk into the forest without even hesitating.
Sirius didn’t stop walking, but he grabbed Charlie’s arm. When she glanced over her shoulder at him, he said quietly, “We don’t have to go in there.”
Charlie turned her head and looked ahead at the ominous woods looming toward them. For a moment, fear fluttered in her heart, but determination and pure stubbornness had her thrusting out her chin and assuring Sirius, “We’ve already come this far.”
All three of them pulled out their wands and held them at the ready. They crept through the trees as silently as they could, which was no easy task, and kept a sharp eye out at all times. The further they went, the denser the trees grew and the darker it got. Soon the tops of the trees blocked out the moon, so James lit his wand as dimly as he could while still being able to see what lay ahead.
Despite herself, Charlie started to shiver, both with nerves and from the chill. A fog was creeping up, covering the forest floor and making it hard for them to see even their feet. They managed to keep Jessica in view.
Sometimes the blonde would look over her shoulder, and James and Sirius would pull Charlie behind the nearest tree.
“What the devil are we hiding for?” she asked them. “We’re under the invisibility cloak.”
“That doesn’t make us any less solid,” James explained. “The fog floats around us; I don’t know about you, but I’ve never known fog to have a big hole in the middle of nowhere.”
“Oh.” Charlie looked at the offending mist. “I hadn’t thought of that.”
They followed Jessica for what seemed like hours, but in reality was only about forty-five minutes total. Eventually, she brought them to a clearing. As Charlie, James, and Sirius slowly approached, they realized that Jessica had been going to a meeting, but it wasn’t with her boyfriend.
Several other black-cloaked figures stood conversing in a circle. At Jessica’s arrival, they stopped talking and turned towards her.
“You’re late,” one of them stated flatly.
“Keira Hoffman didn’t fall asleep until about one o’clock. Excuse me for not wanting anyone to know I was leaving.”
James and Sirius again pulled Charlie behind the tree nearest the group, then watched and listened.
“Now,” Jessica began, “what’s this all about?”
The reply came from the same flat voice that had announced her impromptu arrival.
“The Mudblood chose death.”