Chapter 4: Well, here it goes
Harry was in the study of his newly completed addition to the Burrow. The addition was added just last week. Up stairs it had a bedroom with a large bed and a full bathroom. Downstairs was a library full of muggle and wizard books alike. There were a few couches and chairs placed throughout the room. Harry was sitting in a chair along side the wall across from the door into the Weasley’s living room. “This is what muggles think wizards are,” Harry thought to himself while he put down the muggle novel that he had been reading. “If they only knew the truth,” Harry mumbled. He heard a loud bang coming from outside as he stood up. “Ginny must be back,” he thought.
Ginny was standing outside with her mouth wide open. Her house was different. There was a new addition along one side. She didn’t know what to think, so she just stood there. “Let me help you with those,” said Harry as he walked towards her and picked up her trunk.
“What is that?” asked Ginny while pointing at the new addition to the Burrow.
“Oh that, it’s the new addition that was put on a week ago. It has my room and a bathroom upstairs, and a study downstairs.” Harry looked at her and started to bring her trunk into the house. Ginny closely followed not sure what to make of everything.
When they entered the kitchen, Ginny was met with a large hug from Mrs. Weasley. “Oh Ginny dear, it is good to see you. We all missed you.”
“Not as mush as Harry though,” said Fred poking his head around his mother. “Harry here has taken to pacing his room and locking himself in the study lately.”
“Shut up Fred,” said Harry laughing. “Well, part of what he said is true. I have missed you a lot, although the pacing and locking part is a little bit over-exaggerated.”
“Oh, it is? That would be news to me,” replied Fred. Everyone else walked into the room and greeted Ginny. Harry left to go put Ginny’s stuff in her room.
“Mom, why did you have new rooms put on the house?” asked Ginny
“Harry needed a room to himself. He paid for everything, so we were happy to have him.”
“Oh, ok,” said Ginny looking a little confused.
“I couldn’t keep living in one of your brothers' room forever,” said a returning Harry. “I’ll give you the grand tour.” Harry took Ginny’s hand in his and led her off to see the new rooms. When Harry passed Fleur, she nodded her head and Harry just shrugged.
Harry showed her the upstairs first. She seemed impressed at the size of the bed and threw him a mischievous smile. Harry retrieved something small from the top drawer of his nightstand. “What is that?” she asked Harry.
“Oh this? It’s nothing important,” he said as he quickly shoved it into the pocket of his jeans. He continued with the tour, although he skipped the bathroom. There isn’t anything special about a bathroom after all.
When he was finished showing her the library, he sat down on a chair and she sat on his lap putting her arms around his neck. “I never got a chance to say this earlier, but it is good to see you again. I won’t say that what Fred said earlier was a lie. I really did miss you a lot and it made me a little grumpy and withdrawn, but that doesn’t matter right now.”
“I missed you too,” replied Ginny as she gave him a kiss. “Hermione is going to love this place. It’s going to be hard to get her out of here.”
“When is she coming?”
“She said she would be along in a day or two. She wanted to finish grading some essays before she left. I think McGonagall isn’t too happy with her not staying over the break, but all the other professors are going home to see their families too. It is the first Christmas since the death of Voldemort after all.”
“Thanks to me,” said Harry jokingly, but Ginny could sense a little bit of sadness in his voice.
“Are you ok?”
“Of course. I’m with you. Why would you ask that?”
“I’m not stupid Harry. I heard a hint of sadness in your voice. You know you can tell me anything.”
“I know,” he sighed. “It’s just a little bittersweet. My life had always been building towards one task. Now that it’s done, I don’t know where I’m going or what I’m doing. What else is there to do?”
“I don’t know. Maybe get married, even raise some children.”
“The thought had crossed my mind.”
“I’m sure it has,” said Ginny with a smile. “Harry, a lot of people have asked me what happened while you were gone. I didn’t know what to say because you never talked about it.”
“What have they been asking?”
“Everyone keeps asking how you became powerful enough to defeat Voldemort. No one had been able to defeat him before or even subdue him.”
“There are a few things. I had a lot of free time to read. I needed to do research into Voldemort and what he did before he tried to kill me when I was one. I would sneak into Hogwarts using a secret passage and go into the library,” said Harry. “Don’t ask me why I didn’t go see you, Ron, and Hermione. You already know the answer,” he said when he saw the look on Ginny’s face. She knew why he didn’t and silently nodded. “While I was reading books, I picked up a bunch of useful spells that they don’t teach in any classes. Only the bookworms like Hermione would ever find them. That was part of it.”
“What’s the rest?”
“Dumbledore always said that I had a power in large quantities that Voldemort had absolutely none of. It was love. Love saved me many times. There were a few times that I was backed into a precarious position. The only thing I had to do was think of you and I would somehow find my way out of it. My love for you made me stronger. I had to survive and come back to you. Somehow it saved me when I confronted Voldemort. It made me faster and think clearer. I was able to stun the death eaters and finally kill Voldemort. So, you played as big a part in this as me. I could never had done it without you.” Harry said that last comment and let out a laugh.
“Aren’t you afraid that you will be like Voldemort now? He killed people and tore his soul in pieces. Just look at what it did to him.”
“No, I’m not worried. While in the restricted section of the library one night I came upon a very strange book. It was all about ancient magic. In one of the chapters it talked about how souls are severed. It only occurs when someone murders an innocent person. Voldemort is obviously not innocent.”
“Really?” asked Ginny
“Yeah, I’m sure. It was in an obscure book written by Rowena Ravenclaw. I’m surprised that Dumbledore never told me that. I guess he didn’t know about it, or maybe it just slipped his mind.”
“Maybe he didn’t know about the book.”
“Could be. The book was hidden behind another very dusty book. Dumbledore always said he didn’t know all of Hogwarts secrets.”
“Where is the book now?”
“It’s not at Hogwarts anymore. I needed it on my adventures. Its somewhere in the room right now.”
“Can I read it?” asked Ginny
“Later. There is something more important that I need to talk to you about.”
“What is it?”
“I told you how much I love you. I need to know how much you love me.”
“Do you really need me to answer that question?” said Ginny a little annoyed at the question.
“Yes. It is important. I need to know.”
“Ok, if you say so. I’ve had boyfriends before, but none of them are like you. I had a crush on you from the time I saw you at King’s Cross Station at the end of your first year. It was pretty obvious that I liked you. My brothers used to tease me all the time about it. I used to be too nervous to talk in front of you. Eventually, I relaxed, but when I did, you were interested in Cho Chang. As I told you at Dumbledore’s funeral, I never gave up on you. Eventually, we got together and I was in love from the first kiss. My love for you has only grown since.” Harry had a tear in his eye and remained silent. Ginny wiped the tear from his eye, and when she did so, he leaned in and kissed her more passionately then ever before. The kiss only lasted a few seconds before Harry pulled back.
“I always held a little bit of a soft spot for you. I always thought it was because you were my best friend’s sister. I wish I realized the truth sooner. We could have been together a lot longer.”
“Things happen when they are supposed to happen. You just have to wait till the circumstances are right, and everything will fall into place. Things are great between us. I wouldn’t want to change a thing.” When she said this, Harry once again felt a twinge of doubt. All the confidence that he had gained after she told him how much she loved him was instantly washed away. “Is something wrong? You are almost too quiet.”
“It’s nothing. I was just thinking about something,” replied Harry quickly clearing his mind. “How has school been? It must be interesting now.”
“It’s pretty much the same. No one knew that we were still together. I must have been asked out by five guys on the train.”
“What did you say to them?”
“Nothing really. I just said no and continued on with whatever conversation I was having.”
“You didn’t say anything about me. Why not?”
“I didn’t want the extra attention. Eventually, I got fed up with everyone asking me out, so I finally gave in and told them about you. Some first year named Stephen Pierce kept asking me if I was really Harry Potter’s girlfriend and asked me to get your autograph.” Harry laughed, after all, she could make him laugh like no other.
Fleur, Bill, Ron and Charlie soon came into the study, claiming they missed Ginny too and deserved to spend some time with her as well. They started exchanging stories with Ginny. She told them about the guys asking her out and Stephen. Fleur kept looking at Harry, and whenever she did, Harry just shook his head and shrugged his shoulders. Before long, they all got up and walked into the kitchen for some lunch.
Fleur hung back, waiting for Harry to walk by. When he did, she grabbed him by the arm and pulled him back into the study. “Why haven’t you asked 'er yet?”
“I was going to. I’m still having doubts. Something that she said made sense though. She told me things are meant to happen at a certain time. I won’t have any doubts when the time is right.”
“If you don’t ask 'er soon, I’m going to tell everyone what you told me zat night.”
“Fleur, please don’t do that. Just let me take things at my own pace.”
“Whatever you say, but you 'ave to do it during Christmas break. I don't want to endure your moodiness until summer vacation.
Ginny poked her head back into the room and said, “What’s taking you so long? Mum says lunch is ready. It will get cold soon.”
“I’m coming, Ginny,” said Harry and he walked by Fleur and into the kitchen. Fleur stood in silence for a moment before joining everyone else.
Harry woke up early the next morning. There was something that he felt he had to do. He went to the kitchen and found Mr. Weasley sitting there. “Good morning.”
“Good morning, Harry,” he replied. “Sit down and let’s talk.”
“Ok,” he replied. He shared a cup of tea with Mr. Weasley and talked about life before Harry got up from his seat and walked towards the door.
“Where are you going?” he asked
“Godric’s Hollow. I need to go do something.”
“See your parent’s grave,” he replied. Harry nodded and walked out the door. He stopped, turned around just outside the door and stuck his head back into the kitchen.
“Please don’t tell Ginny where I went. Just let her know that I’ll be back later.” Mr. Weasley just nodded but he had a worried look on his face. He thought of Harry as one of his own kids.
“Just one more thing. I’m sure that you have realized this, but I’m thinking about asking Ginny to marry me. I just wanted to make sure it was ok with you and Mrs. Weasley.”
“Of course you have my permission. I would be honored to have you as a son-in-law.” Harry just nodded and left.
He was gone seconds before Ginny came into the room. “Hey Dad Where is Harry? I thought I heard his voice.”
“He left for a little while. He said he would be back later.”
“Where did he go?” asked Ginny.
“I can’t say.” Ginny sensed that he was worried for him.
“Dad, is something wrong?”
“No. Why would you say that?”
“I can tell that you are worried about Harry. I want to know what is wrong.”
“He made me promise not to tell. I am worried for him, but it is nothing serious. You two should have a talk when he gets back.”
“I intend to,” replied an annoyed Ginny.
Harry appeared in Godric’s Hollow and made his way through the winding streets towards the cemetery. He knew the way because he made the trip once before. The last time he was here, he was with Ron and Hermione. They came to see the graves of his parents right before Bill and Fleur’s wedding. This time it was winter. Snow covered the normally green grass and obscured the writing on the graves. Before long, he was at his parents plot. There were a few other people saying their respects to their loved ones too. Harry wiped the snow from his parents’ grave marker. He re-read the inscription many times.
Tears started to fall from his eyes, landing in the soft snow at his feet. “Mom, Dad, I don’t know what to do anymore. I’m so confused. I wish you were here so you could tell me what to do. I know I love her and she loves me, but I can’t help but have doubts for some reason or another,” Harry said while crying.
“Talking to yourself is never a good idea,” said a voice from behind him. Turning, Harry saw Lupin standing there. He wiped the tears from his eyes and forced himself to stop crying.
“What are you doing here? I asked Mr. Weasley not to say anything.”
“He didn’t tell me. I came here on my own accord. We just bumped into each other. Quite a rather funny coincidence, if you think about it.”
“Do you come and see them often?” he asked.
“Not very. This is the first time in over three years. It is fate that we both picked the same time and day to come here.”
“Great, more fate. I’m sick and tired of fate running my life.”
“Do I sense a little bit of pent up anger?”
“Just a little.”
“Harry why are you here? I heard you say something about doubts.”
“I came here to think.”
“About Ginny?” asked Remus.
“Does everyone know what’s going on between me and her?”
“Quite the contrary. No one knows what’s going on with you. Harry, everyone is worried about you.”
“They don’t need to be. I can take care of myself.”
“There is no doubt about that. Why don’t we go find somewhere warmer to talk?” Lupin walked with Harry to a local restaurant. They sat down in a booth, far away from anyone else.
“Now Harry, would you please tell me what is wrong?”
“It’s stupid really. I never once had doubts about confronting Voldemort, but I can’t even go up to Ginny and ask her to marry me.”
“Is that what you intend to do?” asked Lupin. Harry nodded. “That is good news. I’m sure you two will be very happy together. If you don’t mind me asking, why are you having doubts?”
“I don’t know. Every time I think about asking her, doubts flash through my mind.”
“Is that all?”
“What do you mean by that? Of course that is all.”
“Those aren’t really doubts Harry. You are just nervous. You father went through the same thing.”
“He did?” asked Harry, his spirits rising.
“Of course. All men do. It is a natural thing to be nervous when asking the woman you love to marry you. James was a wreck. He was liable to hex anyone that looked at him the wrong way because he was so nervous. You seem to be taking it much better then him.”
“You think so?”
“Yes I do. You just have to get it over with. The longer you wait the worse everything will be.”
“Thanks Remus.”
“Anytime Harry.” Harry got up, shook Lupin’s hand and said his goodbyes. When Harry was at the door, Lupin said “Good luck.” Harry nodded and proceeded out the door. Once he was out of the sight of any muggles, he apperated back to the Burrow. He stopped by the back door and thought to himself, “Well, here I go.”
He opened the door to find Ginny in the kitchen with Hermione. Hermione had just arrived with her things. “Hello Harry,” said Hermione when she saw him enter.
“Where have you been? How dare you leave and tell my Dad not to tell me where you went?” asked Ginny furiously, poking her finger at his chest.
“Calm down Ginny. I will tell you everything. I just didn’t want any interruptions. Although, that didn’t quite work out.”
“Give him a chance to explain,” said Hermione. “By the way Harry, they new rooms look amazing. I love to study.”
“Thanks and thanks again,” he replied. “Listen Hermione, I need to talk to Ginny alone for awhile.”
“No problem. I’ll just go have a look around the study. I might even find that book Ginny told me you found in the Hogwarts library.”
“Ginny, could we go up to my room?” Ginny nodded and followed Harry upstairs. Harry sat on the end of his bed and put his head in his hands.
Ginny could see that something was bothering him. “What is it? Is there something wrong?”
“Not anymore,” he replied. He lifted his head up and a smile crept across his face. “I have been thinking a lot about us. I went to my parents' grave this morning to think.”
“Why didn’t you bring me along? I want to help you. Just tell me what is bothering you.”
“I didn’t bring you along because I wanted to be alone. I know that you want to help, but it wouldn’t be much help since you are the source of the problem.”
“What?” asked Ginny. She looked hurt.
“Don’t worry. It really isn’t anything bad. I promise you.”
“Ok, then just tell me what is wrong.”
“Well, here it goes,” thought Harry. He stood up and walked over to the dresser by his bed and opened the top drawer. He saw the little box sitting there and grabbed it. He didn’t bother hiding it. He walked back by Ginny and kneeled in front of her. He took her hand and said, “Ginny, I love you more then anything. I don’t know what I would do without you. Will you marry me?” Ginny’s jaw dropped. She was in a state of shock. It took a minute or two till she could respond.
“Of course I will.” Harry opened the box and slipped the ring on her finger. “Oh, Harry, it’s beautiful.”
“Not nearly as beautiful as you,” he replied before he stood up and kissed her.
“So, what was the problem? Why did you need to go think by yourself?”
“I’ve been having doubts since October. I almost asked you that day in Hogsmeade, but something stopped me. I went to Godric’s Hollow to see my parents' grave and think alone. Only, Lupin showed up. He said it was fate that we ended up meeting there. We talked for awhile and he told me that my father went through the same things when he was getting ready to ask my mother to marry him. He said that he was liable to hex anyone for even looking at him wrong. He also gave me some more good advice. He said it wasn’t really doubts, but that I was just nervous.”
“I could have told you that silly,” she replied giving him a light elbow to the ribs. “I wish you would have said something to me sooner. We could have worked this out together.”
“I probably should have, but I really needed to figure things out without you. I’m sorry for taking so long though.”
“No need to apologize. I love you so much. I guess we should go tell everyone the good news.”
Harry nodded and walked hand in hand with Ginny downstairs. When they came to the living room, they found everyone, but Hermione, sitting there talking. “Could you go get Hermione? Stun her if you have to, but get her out here now. I don’t want to have go through this a million times,” Harry whispered to Ginny so that no one else could hear him. Ginny nodded and ran off to find Hermione. She returned seconds later, dragging Hermione into the room. “Me and Ginny have something to tell you all.” Harry scanned the room and saw the look on their faces. Everyone looked confused, except for Mr. Weasley. He had a slight smile on his face. When Harry saw him, he dipped his head slightly, in an affirmative nod. He returned the gesture.
Ginny couldn’t hold back any longer and burst out, “Harry asked me to marry him and I said yes ”
“It took you long enough to ask ‘er,” said Fleur. Harry and Ginny both laughed.
“Oh, Harry, Ginny, this is great news,” said Mrs. Weasley as she stood up and pulled them both into a large hug. “I can’t wait till the wedding.” Once she let them go, everyone else stood up and one by one congratulated them.
“Well done, Mate,” said Ron, patting Harry on his shoulder.
“I’m so happy for you two. You better invite me, because I’m gonna be there whether you like it or not,” cried Hermione
“Of course you are invited. Well, at least when we pick a date you will be,” replied Harry. Much of the afternoon was spent discussing wedding dates and other small details. Eventually they settled on August 12th.
Harry and Ginny were inseparable for the rest of the Christmas break. When it was time for Ginny to go back for the next term, Harry found it easier to say goodbye.
As he watched her leave aboard the Knightbus, Mr. Weasley came up behind him and said, “The next time you see her, the wedding planning will really begin.”
“I can’t wait,” he replied.
“You say that now, but wait till you are asked to pick out dress robes and all that other stuff.”
Harry turned to Mr. Weasley and again said, “I can’t wait.”