Dean leaned against the wall as he watched everyone leave. Everyone was leaving, going home for the holidays. But he had stayed behind. After he’d gotten the hastily written letter from his mother, he knew for sure that Hogwarts was going to be better than his house, but he still wanted to go somewhere. Anywhere.
Dearest Dean, (the letter had read)
Your father and I haven’t settled the divorce yet. We’ll have everything worked out soon. Feel free to come home. You can take the train. Here’s some money. I’ll be seeing you.
Love,
Mother
PS: I’ve included some money for the train ride, if you decide to come up.
Bound to the letter had been enough money for a ticket to go to the very edge of the country and back. She doesn’t have time for me, Dean thought bitterly. She doesn’t even have time to count out some freaking galleons. And if that wasn’t enough, Ginny had also just dumped him.
And so Dean, looking surly and grumpy, leaned against the wall watching Filnch poke random people in random places with his Secrecy Sensors. He knew it was petty, but he couldn’t help smiling when remembering Ginny’s brother—who had only been on the quidditch team because he was close to Harry—had gotten an extra hard poke. He felt something in his chest thud against his ribcage and shatter when he also remembered seeing Ginny with her fingers entwined with Harry’s. Oh, he thought dully, that must be my heart. Despite the fact that he was still friends with Harry and Ron, all of the feelings he still had for Ginny sometimes got the better of him.
While watching the flow of gay, cheerful people move through the gates, Dean had barely noticed that Lavender was standing directly across from him, doing the same thing. She and Parvati had been there for a while, just talking in hushed tones until Parvati left. Dean was too dismal to notice. But now he did, and it seemed that they had spontaneously noticed each other at the same time. Or, at the very least, she’d noticed that he was looking at her. Because just as he took a step toward her, she stood up a little straighter and waved at him. Dean knew she was infamous for flirting with other seventh years—at least, according to the stories Padma told—but, in the spirit of Christmas, he dragged his gloomy self across the hall to say hi.
Lavender was nearly glowing with happiness. She seemed like she didn’t have a care in the world. She was drowning in her own joy. Lucky her. She smiled at Dean when he made his way over to her and took a spot next to her on the wall. Now that he was up close, Dean could tell that not everything was so perfect, though. It seemed almost like her air of happiness and cheer was almost fake. When he looked deep into her eyes, he could tell that something was definitely wrong. She seemed..... pained.
"So, what have you been up to?" she asked casually. Dean shrugged.
"Not much. I’m on the quidditch team, so practices and games take up a lot of my time—"
"No," she interrupted, "I mean just now. Like, how you’re standing against the wall and watching all these other happy people go lead their happy lives." Dean almost smiled. Lavender was actually pretty sharp. Smarter than you’d think, talking to Padma. The two of them hadn’t been exactly friends since Lavender had ‘taken Padma’s boyfriend.’ Dean knew that Zacharias was secretly meeting at least three other girls at night while they were dating, but he didn’t bother mentioning that to her. He just wondered why it had taken her so long to notice.
"I could ask you the same thing," he replied coolly, arching an eyebrow. She smiled brightly and paused for a second too long. Dean could tell she was searching for an answer. After a long moment, she sighed and just told him the truth:
"I was going to go on a long ski-trip with Parvati and Padma, but Padma thinks I ‘stole’ Zacharias away from her. And now I’m the last person she wants to deal with. And Parvati’s really mad at me. I don’t know why. I can’t go home, because the ski-trip’s been scheduled for a long time, and my parents planned their own vacation. I don’t want to interrupt it. They don’t want me to intrude. And Parvati and Padma don’t want me either. And, um, I was going to meet Zacharias, but with all the things going on between him, Padma, and I, I figured....." her voice trailed off.
"Yeah," he agreed, "I can tell things aren’t going to well."
"Oh really?" she asked. "How would you know?"
"Well," he began hesitantly, "it’s not exactly a secret. Padma’s been telling anyone who’ll listen." Lavender bit her lower lip and all of her brightness faded away.
"Oh," she said meekly. "Then I guess that’s why Parvati’s mad at me."
Despite the fact that his world was crashing down on top of him, he felt a sharp pang of sympathy for her. And then his face began to feel warm, and he noticed for the first time that night how pretty she really looked.
And despite the fact that everyone was turning against her, Lavender could tell that something was wrong with Dean. And it became incredibly important to her.
"You never answered my question," she pointed out.
"Oh, right. Sorry," he apologized. But he didn’t say anything else.
"Well," she prompted. "Come on. I just told you something..... personal about myself. Your turn." Dean sighed, but he reluctantly let it spill out.
"My parents are getting divorced. I don’t want to go there, to my house. They don’t care about me any more. They’re too busy setting traps for each other, bombing each other with legal things, and acting like six year olds. And I hate it. Staying at Hogwarts is so much better than going home." Lavender was surprised. Now her ‘big deal’ seemed so petty and stupid next to his.
"I’m sorry," she apologized. She felt terribly guilty, but she didn’t know what for.
"It’s alright," Dean said, forcing casualness into his voice. "It’s not your fault or anything. In fact, I’m glad they’re finally getting a divorce. It’d be better than hearing the constant fighting over stupid things. Once they don’t live together any more, it’ll be better." He sounded so confident, so sure of himself. Lavender hoped to Merlin that he was right. And if it wasn’t..... I’ll be there for him, she decided suddenly. It wasn’t debatable. She’d be his shoulder to cry on, his security, his confidence..... Whatever he needed.
"So, since we’re both miserable and alone," she began, making an almost desperate reach, "why don’t we be so together?" She took his hand and began to lead them away from the overcrowded hallway. Stunned, he followed. What just happened, he asked himself. Whatever it was, he wasn’t complaining.
They walked together in silence, but now that they were inside the huge crowd, talking would’ve been pointless. He could barely hear himself think. When they reached a quieter, more secluded area, she let go of his hand. She turned and faced him, and her eyes told him everything.
I’m here, they said. I’m here for you. I’ll be here when you need me. But even more, they screamed, I need you! Dean felt a sudden pain in his chest that he couldn’t identify. Unconsciously, he leaned forward..... forward..... He took a step closer to Lavender. He didn’t know what he was doing. He was on fire. Half of it was from excitement, from Lavender. And half of it was the pain in his chest. A mental picture of himself flashed through his eyes. He was red-hot. He reminded himself of.....
Ginny’s hair, he thought unexpectedly. That thought made him stop in his tracks. Ginny.....
Lavender was confused, and also on fire. Half of it was from sheer excitement, from Dean. And half of it was from a terrible guilt.
I shouldn’t been doing this, she told herself strictly. But she had no idea why. That’s not fair to him..... Lavender had no idea what she was thinking about. All thoughts of Zacharias had left her, and she was pretty sure she’d seen him in that crowd, hand-in-hand with Hannah Abbot. But she didn’t care about him anymore. And Dean wanted this just as much as she did. It couldn’t have been him. Who was she thinking of?
One word flashed through her mind. It made her freeze. Ron.
Dean and Lavender were mere inches apart. Both of them were very, very still. Both of the had private agendas. Including two different Weasleys.
This is stupid! Dean told himself. He tried not to picture Ginny’s gorgeous locks of red hair and freckles. We broke up. A while ago. And now she’s off saving the world. But still he couldn’t shake the feeling that she was going to be mad at him for what he’d almost done to Lavender. Furious at himself, his parents, and Ginny for confusing him and playing games with him, he suddenly swooped down and kissed Lavender.
Lavender was too shocked to respond for a moment. What is he doing? she asked herself. Her mind was being mean, making her think of the things she didn’t want to. So without thinking she kissed him back.
It was a blissful moment for both of them, forgetting all of their problems and worries.....
Then they pulled back. Slowly. Regretfully. They didn’t want it to end. Neither of them did. When they were far enough apart so that they could see each others’ faces, they both smiled.
"I liked that," Dean said, smiling. Lavender could only nod in agreement, then she threw her arms around him. He was thrown off, but quickly recovered and wrapped his arms around her. They stood like that for a couple long minutes. And then Dean let her go, she let him go, they joined hands, laced their fingers together, and walked out into the sea of people again. This time, though, rather than misery, they felt like they were blank slates. This was a new beginning.
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