Ha! It's mine, all mine! I will own the Harry Potter characters and use them for my own evil ends!
No, wait, I won't.
When we left off, our hero was in the horns of a dilemma. Left alone in the world, without any of his former protectors, Harry is faced with the biggest challenge of his life – finding and defeating the four remaining Horcruxes and, of course, Lord Voldemort.
The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Ravenclaw’s or Gryffindor’s, Harry thought to himself, as he had, constantly, since the death of Albus Dumbledore. The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Ravenclaw’s or Gryffindor’s…
He needed to sleep, but could not. Dreams didn’t bother him, but he sat up all night, wondering about the locations of the objects he had to find.
In the sleeping bag on the floor next to the bed, Ron Weasley grunted in his sleep. Ron, not having to do what Harry would soon have to be doing, could sleep just fine with no problems. Harry, however, was kept awake by his own plans – or lack thereof. The truth was, he had no idea what to do after this time was over. He had slept occasionally, but he knew that remaining in Privet Drive would not be an option much longer, because he honestly couldn’t stomach the concept. He had eaten there every day, spent time with Ron and Hermione, visited Mrs. Figg, and hexed Dudley (with two overage wizards living in his home, the Ministry hadn’t been able to suss out who was responsible, nor did they really care once they met Dudley.)
But in truth, he was more lost than he had ever felt before. Ron’s brother Bill’s wedding was only a week away – Harry knew they would have to leave the Dursleys before then, because he couldn’t stand it anymore. Then where would they go? Not to Godric’s Hollow – he wanted to save that particular trip for after the happy times. Not the Burrow either – living in the same house as Ginny Weasley, the girl Harry would do anything to be able to be close to, would be torture for Harry right then. He didn’t have any other close friends in whose homes he would feel welcome. The only other option was the house he actually owned – number twelve, Grimmauld Place – and he couldn’t stand the thought of living there, where Sirius had spent his last
year cooped up.
So, instead, he focused on his mission. The locket, the cup, the snake, something of Ravenclaw’s or Gryffindor’s…
But if he let himself think about this mission for too long, he kept thinking of all the reasons behind his mission, all the deaths and torturing he had failed to prevent. Harry felt guilty about quite a few things these days. He felt guilty for the deaths of those near to him: Sirius, Dumbledore, his parents, and Cedric Diggory. He felt guilty for the danger he was putting Ron and Hermione in, and the fact that he had left Ginny behind. He even felt guilty for planning to kill a fellow human being, even if it was just Voldemort.
Intellectually, Harry knew he shouldn’t feel guilty for this. None of it had been caused by him, after all. But he hadn’t ended the war in time to save some of the most important people in his life, and it was beginning to get to him. Harry suspected some of his depression came from being cooped up in this house, again, knowing what he needed to do, but being unable to get started for his own protection, watching the Daily Prophets pile up with the names of new victims of Voldemort appearing every day. It was enough to make anyone insane.
All in all, this was still the best summer of his life so far. The Dursleys were all so terrified of Ron and Hermione that the house bent to their wills, and it was the last time Harry would ever have to be there. Voldemort was on his way to defeat, and Harry had plans for his future afterward.
Ron grunted again.
Harry looked over at his best friend and smiled slightly. Having Ron and Hermione here was a mixed blessing at best. He delighted in having his friends nearby and in the reactions of the Dursleys to their presence, but he also feared that they would be mistreated by his “family,” or that keeping them close to him would put them in greater danger than they already were.
He had to stop thinking about this. It would only bring nightmares…and Harry was sick of the nightmares. Sometimes he thought that he would rather die than have another one. Then he felt guilty for that, because his nightmares had occasionally proven useful.
As exhaustion overcame him, he drifted off to sleep….
Severus, please… echoed the voice of Albus Dumbledore. And then a blast of green light, and the graceful arc Dumbledore’s body had made as it fell from the tower… Severus, please… again, the scene of Dumbledore’s death played in Harry’s brain. He lay still, forced to watch, over and over… until finally, he knew it by heart, the sound of Snape crying, “Avada Kedavra!” and the way Dumbledore had stared into Snape’s cold, hate-filled eyes…
Suddenly, the dream shifted. Dumbledore froze in place, but Snape turned to Harry, and though he was on the Astronomy tower, he was also in his dungeon, lecturing about techniques involved in Occlumency. “Eye contact is often essential in Legilimency,” he told Harry. Dumbledore began moving again, and the scene continued.
And Harry suddenly understood. As he understood, he saw it¸ something between the two combatants, almost like a visual echo, a line of light between Snape and Dumbledore.
He awoke with a start. He could only think of one reason why he would see what he had just seen, but it was absolutely bizarre. Could it be true? Did Snape act on his own, or by a command from Dumbledore? For the first time, Harry examined his memory of Snape that night, looking for a hint of Snape’s motive, forcing himself to consider Snape’s look of hatred in light of his own emotions, remembering how it had felt to tip the potion down Dumbledore’s throat, asking himself how he would feel if asked to kill Dumbledore… and realized he was at a loss.
The evidence supported either conclusion, but Harry knew that he was missing something about that night. And he decided, then and there, that the place to begin looking was not Voldemort’s old haunts or the records Dumbledore had left behind, but with Severus Snape and the events surrounding Dumbledore’s death.
Abracadabra by DrTaylor
Chapter Notes: Harry dreams about Dumbledore and is forced to ask some very disturbing questions.