**Saturday, post-McGonagall meeting
Well, I didn’t see this coming.
Professor McGonagall was in a very weird mood when we met with her. You know…sometimes people have those moods where they don’t act like themselves for some odd reason. Well, she was having one. Unfortunately.
I was expecting detention and some points to be docked, but no. Dear Professor McGonagall decided to be creative. She is never creative. This is very uncharacteristic of her. Our conversation went as follows.
McGonagall: Recently I noticed that the three of you have been having some conflicts.
Me: (not out loud) No kidding.
McGonagall: Well, it is obvious to me that I cannot let the three of you go on like this. It is high time that you all learn to respect each other and who knows, you might even become friends.
Ron: *looks amazingly adorable* I agree completely! Now professor, I suggest that you let Hermione and I learn to respect each each other and possibly become friends in a nice little hotel room in Hogsmeade!
McGonagall: Of course! I’ll go make reservations!
Kidding.
McGonagall: No.
Ron: (turns to me) It was worth a shot.
McGonagall: Now, as inapropriate as Mr. Weasley’s comment was, he did bring up a good idea.
Parvati: When?
McGonagall: Hermione and Parvati, I am going to lock you in a room for an hour so you can discuss whatever you want to discuss.
Me: WHAT?
Parvati: NO!
McGonagall: Yes! Then later, I will put Ron and Parvati in a room together for one hour.
Me: NO!
Parvati: Well, if it’s absolutely necessary…(grins with delight)
Ron: So does that mean you’re going to lock Hermione and me in a room for an hour? I think we need to learn to, erm, respect each other too!
McGonagall: No.
Ron: That’s unfair!
McGonagall: Life’s not fair. At some point in the future, I will inform you of the times at which you will be stuck together.
This is cruel and unusual. FIRST I am going to be locked in a room with Parvati. This will not be fun. AND THEN Parvati will be locked in a room with MY BOYFRIEND. This will definitely not be fun…for me at least.
Why, oh why, couldn’t McGonagall just give us detention?
She’s never creative, why’d she have to start now? Why couldn’t she pick another time to act out of character?
I need a sandwich.
**Five minutes later
I have my sandwich now. I’m happier.
**THINGS THAT COULD HAPPEN IF PARVATI AND I ARE LEFT ALONE IN A ROOM FOR AN HOUR**
1.) We just sit there and glare evilly at each other.
2.) She kills me
3.) I kill her
4.) We both kill each other
5.) I turn her into something weird…like…a parrot or something. No, not a parrot, she’d peck my eyes out…maybe a flobberworm. Yeah, that’d work, flobberworms can’t do anything
6.) I’d go insane
7.) She’d go insane
8.) We’d both go equally insane
9.) I’d just start randomly screaming and moaning
10.) She’d just start randomly screaming and moaaning
11.) We’d both just start randomly screaming and moaning
12.) We’d discuss our differences and become the best of friends (ha, yeah right)
13.) We’d settle things with a DANCE OFF
This is not fun. NOT FUN. Why, oh why, do these crazy things always happen to me? Ugh, I need to go read something…maybe do some homework…
**Later
McGonagall sent Ron and me letters. Tommorrow, from one o’ clock to two, I’ll be locked in McGonagall’s office with Parvati. I really hope McGonagall removes all valuable or breakable items from the room, because I think things are going to get ugly.
Ron and Parvati are locked in from two to three. Honestly, don’t know what that woman was thinking when she decided to leave them alone for an hour. I think she’s trying to make me go insane.
**And still later
I hate this. It’s driving me crazy. I just want to get this over with.
**And STILL later
Why do these things always happen to me?
**Sunday, lunch
Well, the time has almost come. I’ve decided to completely ignore Parvati and find some way to amuse myself. If I’m lucky, Parvati will follow suit, and we’ll end up spending the hour sitting there quietly.
Ron’s decided to do the same thing.
“I’m just going to sit there and ignore her,” he told me earlier. “If she tries anything, I’ll just tell her she’s ugly or something.” Honestly, he can be so blunt sometimes, but I love him anyway.
Though…now that I think of it…I still think a dance off it the way to go.
I’m not serious.
But I am.
**2:11
Well, I did it. Here’s what happened.
Ten minutes had passed and both Parvati and I had observed our tacit agreement not to speak to each other. Then, without any warning, FILCH BURST INTO THE ROOM WEARING A FLUFFY PINK NIGHTGOWN!
I’m kidding of course.
HE WAS WEARING A FLUFFY PURPLE NIGHTGOWN!
Kidding, again.
Parvati and I sat on opposite sides of the room in complete silence for the entire one hour period. Actually…that’s not true. About thirteen minutes into it she asked me, “Is there a clock in this place?” and I showed her the clock of McGonagall’s desk, but that was about it.
And now she’s alone in a room with Ron. Ugh.
I need to read something
**Five minutes later
I can’t read.
I wonder what she’s doing in there…I wonder if he’s bored. Oh, poor thing, he’s probably bored out of his mind…I can’t take this, this is cruel and unusual.
I know, I’ll do my potions essays.
**Five more minutes later
I hate potions.
**Two minutes later
Forget potions, I’m doing something else.
**Three minutes later
Oh forget it. I’m just going to sit here and complain.
**WHAT PARVATI AND RON COULD POSSIBLY BE DOING NOW**
1.) Sitting in silence on opposite ends of the room
2.) Having a feeble, pathetic conversation
3.) Parvati is talking, but Ron is ignoring her
4.) Ron has gone insane
5.) Ron has gone insane and Parvati has taken advantage of the situation (badthoughtsbadthoughtsbadthoughts)
6.) Parvati is trying to flirt with Ron, but Ron is ignoring her
7.) Rarvati is trying to flirt with Ron, and Ron is listening (morebadthoughts)
8.) I need to stop writing this list, it’s making me go even crazier than I already am.
**3:11
Well.
Parvati entered the Gryffindor common room smiling. Widely. She passed by me and gave me this weird little look.
And Ron is nowhere to be found.
I know, I’m probably just overreacting. She’s probably just trying to get me to think she did something… But she looks happy. And I can’t find Ron. No…nothing probably happened…they probably just sat there staring at the wall…
But Parvati is whispering to Lavender and now Lavender is smiling.
This can’t be good.