Idiot Ron Starts A War by POTCgirl1337
Chapter Notes: So so so so so so sorry for the terribly long wait! It's been rejected a few times for gramitical errors(never been my strong suit) and I'm really hopping you guys haven't completly forgotten about this story! If you have, it's entirly my fault. :(
I guess I will start off with a little recap. So, the last time we saw the eight teenagers, they were walking through Hogwarts to get to the grounds on Christmas Eve, with the exception of Ron and Neville. Neville was running at full speed trying to get away from a drunken Ron, who was chasing him for something that he had nothing to do with.
After seeing Ron chasing Neville mercilessly through the hall ways, the other six decided that it was in the best interest of Neville to prevent Ron from reaching him. Luckily Ron was not very hard to catch; he could hardly walk in a straight line and kept falling if he gained enough momentum. Neville, on the other hand, was no where to be seen.
Five minutes later, Neville was found hiding behind an overgrown brush scared out of his wits with his face as pale as the snow around him, not much was scarier than a drunken Ron chasing you like a mad man. Once they were all together they went though a last overview of all the rules. “OK you guys,” Harry began, “we all know the rules; Every man/woman for him/herself, there is NO teaming up, only snow and no wands.” As a precaution, all their wands had been left in the Gryffindor Tower. The eight disbanded and had ten minutes to go their separate ways and prepare themselves for battle.
Once the ten minutes were up, eight loud choruses of “ATTACK!” were heard throughout the grounds of Hogwarts. And thus, The Great and Ferocious Battle began.
* * * * *
“Oh, Ron, don’t be such a baby!” Harry said to a whimpering Ron who was whipping the snow out of his eyes. “It’s just a little snow!”
“But, Harry,” Ron whined, “it stings!”
“Well, if you can’t handle a simple snowball fight, then why don’t you go make some snowmen friends to play with?” huffed Harry as he ducked from an incoming snowball that found its mark on a different victim, Lavender.
“FINE!” Ron shouted. “I will. Stupid boy who lived…” He stalked off, mumbling under his breath rude comments about Harry.
Harry was momentarily surprised that Ron had actually left and was to preoccupied to see a large snowball coming in on his left. WHAM! The snowball smacked directly into his left cheek. After whipping the snow out of his ear, he heard Dean crackling up with laughter. “You should’ve seen you face, Harry!” he laughed. “You were like…!” He made a face of complete idiocy with huge eyes sketched with surprise and lips screaming with a silent shout.
While Dean was busy laughing at him getting hit by a snowball, Harry, fumingly reached down to picked up his own pile of snow and hurdled it straight and his face. But since Dean played chaser, his aim was much better than Harry’s. Poor aim, on top of his ferocious anger, caused the snowball sail right past Dean and land right on the back of Hermione’s head.
Harry, seeing Hermione seize up at the icy chill, dove behind a snow bank so she wouldn’t see him. Whipping around, Hermione saw Dean struggling to stand up and Parvati, bent down to pack up a fresh ball. Seeing Parvati as the most likely to be at fault of her newly soaked head, she charged, with a ball ready in her hand. But to everyone’s surprise, she didn’t throw it; instead she ran up behind her, pulled on the back of her robes and shoved a handful of snow onto her bare back. A milk-curdling screech pierced through everyone’s ears.
As Parvati turned around, twitching like mad, Hermione was right up in her face with a satisfied smirk, one that no one had seen since the day she punched Malfoy back in the third year. “ACK!” She shouted, continuing with her twitch like dancing, “I am SO going to get you for that, Hermione!” as she ran off a large chunk of snow was seen falling out of the back of her robes, followed by a loud sigh of relief.
A little ways to the right of the group was Seamus and Neville. After Neville threw a snowball at Seamus’s face, Seamus did almost the same thing as Hermione, he charged at Neville. The difference was that Seamus didn’t have a snowball; he was simply running at Neville, with intent to tackle. Once Neville realized Seamus’s intentions, his eyes grew wide and tried to back up. When he backed up, his foot caught on a stick and he fell back at exactly the same time Seamus jumped at him. Once in the air, Seamus, noticed that the only thing in his path was, well, nothing. He curled into a ball to prevent injury to his neck and ended up rolling quite a ways before crashing full-force into Harry, who was still crouched by the snow bank.
Now, so far Lavender had managed to stay, for the most part, out of harm’s way. But this was all about to change. An anger-stricken Parvati was making her way towards Lavender looking murderous.
"Lavender!" Parvati shouted at her totally oblivious friend. "Hey, thanks for the heads up! So much for friends having each others back!" her eyes flashed menacingly. "I ought to repay the favor!" true to her word, Parvati threw the slushiest snowball she could make, and with her aim spot on, it found its target.
“EEK! Why did you do that? You’re going to make my mascara run, you evil little twit!” Lavender wailed. She began profusely whipping at her eyes trying to make them look like she hadn’t been beaten up. With her left hand still going at it, her right bent down to scoop up a ball of slush. Packing it one-handedly to the best of her ability she attempted to throw it towards her friend’s voice with her eyes closed.
Parvati began laughing evilly at the other girl’s inability to see and therefore throw properly; she didn’t even have to move to avoid being hit by a snowball. Instead, it came very close to hitting Neville who stood there dumbstruck watching a ball soar towards him, but at the last minute, the wind pick up and it landed gracefully in a small heap next to his left foot.
Neville didn’t take to well with almost being pummeled by a soggy snowball, so he sought out his revenge on the hysterically laughing Patil twin. As quickly as he could, he began grabbing mounds of snow and roundly packing them into the desired shape. After having fifteen or so balls made and in his arms he trudged over to the girls, stopping about twenty feet away he took his first ball, aimed and fired. Not waiting to see if he made his mark, he swiftly shot off the remaining balls.
Looking back at them, he was surprised to find that most had made their mark and that the girls were currently seeking out shelter from under their arms. Brushing his hands off in an arrogant manner, he shot his nose into the air, squared his shoulders and stalked off in the opposite direction of the cowering and infuriated girls.
As the fight raged on, the players continually got more and more soaked. Harry and Dean, previously stuck together as they roll down a hill, finally were able to disentangle themselves from mounds of snow and each other and once again joined in the battle.
The snow passed from person to person for quite a while, sometimes hitting the desired person and sometimes not. After other 20 or so minutes of battle, a terrified scream was heard from over the hill, due north. The seven contestants watched horrifyingly entranced at the hill, all holding their breath in fright. Soon, a figure was seen at the top, “Hey, it’s just Ron!” Harry shouted, squinting at the hill. He turned around to scoop up some snow, thinking it’s the perfect time to get revenge on Dean for tackling him, now that he was preoccupied with Ron. He threw it at Dean, who did not at all have the response he was looking for. He didn’t even register the fact that the snowball was currently sticking to his cheek.
“Umm… Harry? I don’t think it’s just Ron.” confused, Harry looked back at the hill at the sight made his jaw drop.
“RUN!” he shouted. Ron had indeed returned, but he was accompanied by a large number of evil looking snowmen.
A/N: Yay! So there you have it, chapie two. I hope you enjoyed it, and I know I said that they would be a lot longer last chapter but I felt that this was a good place to end. But I seriously promise that next chapter will be longer. I am probably going to add a nice long POV from Ron, after he left. As of now, I'm at 1300 words and I'm only about 1/3 the way done!
And, you know that one thing that all writers LOVE to have readers do? Yea, you know what I talkin about! You don't even have to say anything nice! Criticize me, tell me what I did wrong so you will never see the same mistake from me again! *nervously waits for approval of chapter*