"I don't think we've ever had such a pair of troublemakers"
Chapter Three: Dungbombs
James' eyes opened slowly, still heavy with sleep, to the sounds of shuffling papers, and the distinct sound of a quill scratching against parchment. He sat up in his bed and gradually leaned over to his bed stand and retrieved his glasses. He could hear Sirius snoring in the background as he placed the specs on his nose giving his eyes the chance to focus on the wooden table.
When he could clearly see the grain in the ancient table he turned his attention to the room he was in. For the first time, James took a real look at the circular dormitory. He smiled to himself as he began to unconsciously critique it. The room was spacious and easily fit the four boys and all of their belongings. It had a fair mess to it, as he looked at the clothes that they had scattered on the floor from the night before. He smiled at the homely look they had managed to give it in less than twelve hours. Then he turned his gaze to the window and the rising sun. It really was too early for him to be up, he thought mildly to himself before he stopped to look at Remus, who was up, and also apparently wide awake as he wrote something furiously down on a spare piece of parchment.
"What are you doing?" James whispered not wanting to wake the others. Remus jumped slightly, and glared at his paper where his quill had dripped black ink, untidily, on his newly written words, before he too the time to look up at James.
He shrugged his shoulders before he replied. "I'm writing a letter to my mum."
James' eyebrows furrowed. "Why? Do you miss them already?"
Remus nodded. "A little. I've never really been allowed to go anywhere because of her illness. She was ecstatic when I got my letter, so proud." He gazed at the confused look on James' face that seemed to say 'You're a pureblood why wouldn't you get a letter?' Remus sighed, knowing full that this would have come up eventually. "My mum’s a muggle. My dad’s the wizard, and besides that, everyone in my family gets sick... a lot. We thought the constant threat of illness would keep me away from here. But then Dumbledore was appointed headmaster and he said I could come to school." A smile slowly began to twitch at the corners of Remus' mouth. But it disappeared and he finished seriously, "I'm sorry, I woke you up." With that he returned to his letter.
James laid back down in his bed and stared up at the canopy above him, carefully listening to Sirius' snoring and Peter's soft echoing. No wonder Remus couldn't sleep. He felt sort of sorry for Remus. It must have been horrible to have such an illness in his family, but then again Remus had never said what the ailment was exactly. James sighed in thought, and quickly made a mental note to ask him about that later. Right now, he just wanted to go back to sleep, the only problem was that now he couldn't.
He laid there for a long while before he finally gave up and got out of his warm bed. He then put on his school robes and grabbed his book bag, "I'm going down to the common room." Remus groaned a reply as James walked out of their room and down the staircase to the common room. Once he entered the room he felt his own mouth drop slightly. It was huge. The fireplace had its fire blazing. Its warm glow filled the room’s berth and the warmth it gave was comforting. He smiled slightly as he noticed the red headed girl from last nights feast sitting in one of the large crimson couches. He sat down next to her, and no sooner began to zone out as he stared into the depths of the orange flames dancing wildly within the fireplace.
"You couldn't sleep either?" He jumped at the sound of the soft voice coming from beside him.
"No, one of my roommates woke me up, and I couldn't get back to sleep."
She nodded in understanding, which James found oddly comforting. "I just couldn't sleep." She stated as she pulled out a small muffin and placed it in her mouth. She chewed on it for a while and once the tiny morsel had disappeared. She then turned to James with another cake in her hand. "You want one? My mum made them for me for the train ride. I didn't eat them then because I was too worried about what it would be like here, but they're still good." James took the small cake from her with a small ‘thank- you’. She grinned at him. She has a pretty smile, he thought to himself. "By the way, my name's Lily Evans."
He quickly swallowed the cake she had offered him and replied, praying that he’d managed to get it all down properly, "James Potter." He retorted as he held out his hand.
She took it gratefully. "Nice to meet you James." They shook hands before breaking into a small fit of giggles.
"So you and that friend of yours- Sirius, right?" He nodded, not really caring if she was possibly going to talk badly about one of his other mates, "you were talking about Quidditch. Er- what exactly is that?"
James felt his mouth drop in utter shock. "You don't know what Quidditch is?" She shook her head. He just found himself blink blankly at her, not knowing what to do with such foreign words coming out of her mouth. Once he had finally found the words, he tried his best to explain the sport to her. "Well, then, it's a game that involves brooms. The object is basically to score a bunch of points using the chasers. Each position has a different ball to use. For instance, the Chasers use a Quaffle to score by throwing it through one of three hoops past the Keeper whose sole job is to prevent that exact thing form happening."
"So, he's like a goalie." James arched his eyebrows at her. What was she going on about?
"Sure... anyway, then there's the Beaters and they try to hit the Bludgers out of their team’s way in the other players direction, trying to knock them off of their brooms. Finally, there's the Seeker and their only job is to catch the Snitch- a very small gold ball that's terribly fast and hard to see. Once they accomplish that the games over and the team who caught it is awarded one hundred and fifty points. Most of the time, declaring that team the winner." He finished quickly and looked Lily in the eyes as she nodded her head trying to cover up the fact that her eyes told him she hadn't understood any of it. "It's really simple once you watch a few games."
"Yeah, erm- anyway, how long have you been friends with those three?" She stopped, not wanting to talk about this game anymore, and partially sorry that she had even asked about it in the first place. "Because you seem really close to them."
James sighed. "Sirius, well, we've been friends for as long as I can remember." He stopped to think. Sirius had been his friend forever. He couldn't think of a single memory without Sirius being involved in it someway or another. They were troublemakers together; one would never screw up without the other around for backup. As of late, though, Sirius and he had been reduced to having to sneak out of their houses late in the night so that they could see each other, because their parents had had a row with each other that involved the Black's beliefs about acceptable pureblood behavior. Mainly, how one shouldn't mingle with anyone who talks to muggles or muggleborns.
He looked back at Lily realizing he'd just spaced out again. "Remus we met about a month ago in Diagon Alley, and Peter we just met on the train. No one else would let him stay in their car so we let him stay with us. He seems alright and is pretty much up to all of our plans for this year." He grinned mischievously while his mind traveled back to some of their planned pranks. Peter was sort of on an audition to get into the inner circle in James' mind. Remus had been let in the minute he had ‘accidentally’ tried out one of the Zonko’s product testers on an unsuspecting stockboy. Right now, he just needed a little refining. All of which would come with time.
"What kind of plans?" Lily asked all too interested in what James was possibly up too.
He looked at her blankly, wanting to tell her, but knowing it was too risky in their line of business, "Top secret ones."
She frowned at him just before a sudden movement in the boys’ staircase caused them both to jump. James looked over in the vicinity of where the movement had occurred and his eyes fell upon Remus, who was just standing unsurely at the bottom of the stairs. James grinned at the boy and noticed that his letter was grasped firmly in his hands. "Finished?"
"Yeah, I don't know if it's any good, but it's done." He looked over at Lily. "Hi." He said and then turned back to James. "Er- would you go to the Owlery with me?" James nodded.
Lily smiled at him as he followed Remus out of the room. He gave her a quick wave goodbye before they exited through the portrait hole. Remus and James walked up the innumerable flights of stairs in silence. Just the sound of their footsteps on the stone floor filled the air, but it seemed to be enough for both of the boys as they made their way to their destination. They emerged in the Owlery and Remus went over and attached the letter to one of the school owl's legs before he let it go. He watched it in silence as it gradually disappeared from view. Once he could no longer see it soaring above the forbidden forest he turned back to James. "Who was that girl?"
"Her name is Lily Evans. I think she's muggleborn." He said bluntly without even thinking about how it would sound out in the open.
"Is that a bad thing or something?" Remus asked in a slightly aggravated tone. He hated it when people judged others by what they appeared to be and not by what they actually were. He’d dealt with that issue enough within his own short life.
"No, of course not! She just didn't know about Quidditch and she would know about it if she lived in the wizarding world like you or me. I just put two and two together. Nothing more." He looked at Remus with a quizzical look. "Honestly, it was just an observation."
Remus stared at him for a while with a straight face but then slowly but surely a smile began to tug at his mouth, "Okay, don't get all defensive, I was just razing you." James glared at him. "Anyway," Remus continued looking over James' shoulder before he looked back at him directly, "about that top secret stuff. When are we going to get started? Because it's only the first day and it's still a little early in the year to prank someone." He stopped. James was listening intently but the boy must have misunderstood his blank expression because he continued quickly. "Don't get me wrong, I'm not afraid of pranking, I just...well...think we should start off with a good record before we do something to break the rules. That way we won't be blamed for what we do." He looked at James who had his arms crossed firmly against his chest. "First impressions are important, you know."
James chuckled, "I know that. Plus Sirius and I hadn't planed on anything until about the third week in the month."
Remus' eyes widened. "What!" he exclaimed. Once he realized what he had done his face started to turn a dark shade of crimson. "Erm- how about the last week. I'm -er- going to visit my cousin, she's- er- in hospital and Dumbledore said that was the only week I could escape from my lessons and go to visit her." He lied quickly, without an ounce of the guilt even tracing his face.
James looked at Remus, who wouldn't look him in the eyes. "That's awful." He said as his mind wandered back to what Remus had said earlier. "What's she sick with?"
"Er- the healers don't know and that's why I want to see her. We don't know what's wrong." Remus was amazed at how easy it was to lie to his new friend. But then again, if James or any of the others ever found out the truth about him, he'd have no one left and he’d be alone; again. He had already resolved that he wasn't going to screw this up. He finally had friends and nothing was going to screw that up.
James just stared at Remus in awe. That would be a horrible thing to have in your family, if even the best healers at St. Mungo's Hospital for magical maladies and injuries, didn't even know what was wrong. He was brought out of his trance when Remus told him they should go back to their dorm and collect their things for their first class. James agreed and they made their way back up to Gryffindor tower in as much silence as they had going to the Owlery. They entered their room and found Sirius wide-awake and frantically rummaging through his ‘bottomless’ bag looking for some book that he'd managed to misplace. Peter was in the corner by the window quietly keeping himself busy by looking through his Transfiguration book.
"Where were you?" Sirius said without looking up from his search of the abyss, known currently as: underneath his bed.
"We went to the Owlery to send a letter to my mum." Remus answered.
"Oh," Sirius said nonchalantly. "Have any of you seen my Potions book?"
James rolled his eyes, "I doubt if we have potions today."
"I know that! I would just like to know where it is." He said a little irritated and finally took the time to look up at them. Both Remus and James shrugged in response as Sirius threw his bag down on the floor and began to search through his trunk, which already appeared to have been gone through, at least once, in his hunt.
James just shrugged his shoulders at his friend and opened his own trunk. He took out a thick book (Beginning Transfiguration), a few quills, some ink and an extra sugar quill just incase he didn't feel like writing down any notes for the day; which would probably be the case. He then shoved the objects into his own bag. As soon as he had shut his book bag he shot up from his position on his bed as Sirius yelled out victoriously. Obviously, he had found his book.
"I'm ready," Sirius said suddenly, "anyone want to go down for breakfast?"
James once again found himself roll his eyes at his friend and followed Sirius out of the room with Remus and Peter closely behind him.
The four boys went down to breakfast talking fast to each other about what sort of a monster would be teaching their first class until they reached the Great Hall and took their seats at the Gryffindor table. James unconsciously looked down the table at Lily who was, once again, sitting with the red headed family. She noticed his glance and waved to him. He waved back and then returned to his friend's attention when the prefect handed him his schedule for the day.
"So Quidditch trials start next week. Any of you going to try out?" Sirius said happily. Just then a cruel venomous sounding laugh came from behind them. They all turned around to look at the short boy with greasy black hair that had been sorted into Slytherin during last night's ceremony.
"You're joking right! You don't honestly think you'll make the team." At their stiff expressions the boy assumed that they did. His lip curled into a cruel lopsided grin that showed his yellowish teeth, "That's pathetic. You'll be laughed off the field if you tried something like that. A first year hasn't made the team in nearly eighty years." He gave them one last smirk, "But I'd love to see you try, it’d make for a good laugh." And with that the boy strode off looking quite pleased with himself as he returned to his own table. The four boys made a quick note that he sat alone at the Slytherin table.
"Who the hell does he think he is? Strutting around like that! He hasn't even got any friends!" Sirius exclaimed as soon as the boy had taken his seat at his own table: far away from the four Gryffindors.
James nodded in agreement. "Well, I'm trying out. I don't care what he says."
Remus nearly choked on his pumpkin juice as he strangled out. "You're joking, right?" James gave him his infamous warning glare. "They will laugh you off the field. He may be a jerk, but he's right."
"I don't care." He stated defiantly. James then looked down at his watch hoping for a change of subject. He sighed at the time and then continued. "We should probably be going." He then quickly downed the rest of his food, picked up his bag and left, his friends following closely behind him.
They walked along the endless amounts of halls while Sirius went on about how horrible the greasy haired boy must have to be to have even the Slytherins dislike him. He only stopped when he felt the need to congratulate James on his decision to try out for the team despite what the ‘moron’ had said. Finally, after what had seemed like an eternity to James, they found the Transfiguration room and took up residence in the back of the classroom. The bell rang and Professor McGonagall stood up from her raised desk and waited in front of it until the class had settled down.
"Transfiguration is the ability to turn one object into another." She began firmly and evenly. She looked around at all of the students as she said these words. "Most of you already know this." She took one more sweep of the room with her level gaze. "Of course there are rules in this classroom. I do not except late work, tardiness is inexcusable and two will result in detention. There will be no horseplay in this room and talking when I am is prohibited." She looked firmly at two girls who were located in the front row who were openly gossiping to one another about something insignificant to Transfiguration, no doubt. They grew quiet iimmediately.
"Now, with that being said, I want you all to take a beetle from this box," She held a small wooden box up to the class, "we will be turning them into toothpicks." She handed the box to the two girls who gave the bugs dirty looks. "Now, pay attention, I am only going to do this once." She took out her own beetle from the box, took out her wand, and uttered "Denseligo" to it. Instantly, it turned into a toothpick. "Alright, you have the hour to get it down." She went back to her desk and sat down to take attendance. Occasionally, she would glance up at a certain student and then look back down at the roll.
Sirius leaned into James as he passed him the box of beetles and muttered. "This is going to be fun." He then placed the beetle on his desk.
James nodded. "She's not one you want to cross, is she?" Sirius just grunted as he placed his bug, belly up, on the desktop. James looked at McGonagall before he uttered the spell and looked down at his bug as it morphed into a toothpick. He smiled and turned it back. "That was easy enough." He said proudly.
Sirius groaned. He secretly hated the fact that James was naturally good at pretty much everything he did. He turned his attention back to his own bug and tried the same thing, but only managed to get a crooked toothpick with legs. He turned it back and tried again and. This time he successfully completed the transformation. He looked up from his toothpick-bug and smiled widely at James. Then he turned around. "Remus." He said as he faced the boy behind him. Remus looked up from his deformed beetle a bit provoked. "Have you got it yet?"
"No."
"Oh." Sirius looked over at James who had his book open and was now busy trying to change his ‘toothpick’ into assorted household objects. "Well, James has got it." He said borderline proud, yet there was a tint of bitterness in his young voice.
"I can see that. Now, can I get back to my bug?"
Sirius smirked. "Oh, I understand, you two need some quality time together." He chuckled to himself while Remus just glared at him.
"You think you're clever don't you?" Remus stated sarcastically.
"I am clev-" Just then a small explosion erupted from Sirius' bag as Peter uttered something, obviously, mispronounced in Latin. The chubby boy's eyes grew wide as Sirius' bag began to smoke a bit from its seams, letting off a putrid smell as it began to burn. Sirius looked at him with his eyes wide with anger and shock. "What did you do?" He mouthed as he tried to step on his bag to stop it from further catching on fire. Another dungbomb went off as James began to laugh uncontrollably. He watched while McGonagall stood up from her desk and swiftly made her way towards them, she stopped in front of them with her lips pressed tightly together forming a thin line.
By then the whole class was laughing as Sirius' bag erupted into flames. His stomping grew into a bit of a frantic jig as he tried to put out the growing flames. McGonagall took out her wand and uttered "Exstinguo" to it as water shot out of the tip of her wand and extinguished the fire at Sirius' feet. She rounded on the both of them. "Detention. Sixty points will be taken from Gryffindor." She looked at Sirius and then to James. "And I would like to see you both after class." She turned on her heels and walked back to the front of the room where she situated herself at her elevated desk. "Everyone back to work." She said seriously. Everyone did as they were told.
Sirius took his seat and looked at James. Simultaneously, they turned around to face Peter. "Thanks." They muttered miserably as a girl got up to open a window, in an attempt to get rid of the grotesque smell the Dungbombs had given off which was now lingering within the confines of the classroom.
Class went on for the remainder of the period without interruption until the bell rang, giving James and Sirius the signal to get up and walk the endless trek to the Professor's desk. The other students filed out of the room and once they had all left, James stood up and started to walk towards McGonagall with Sirius in tow. McGonagall looked up at them only when they had stopped directly in front of her, neither one of the boys could bring themselves to make eye contact with her.
"Mr. Black and Mr. Potter." She started as both of them mustered up the courage they needed to look their professor in the face. "I am sorry to say that I am shocked at both of your behavior's. Never before have I seen two Gryffindor's behave as you have today-"
"But it was an accident. Peter blew-" Sirius interrupted only to receive an authoritatively defiant stare from McGonagall.
"Mr. Black, your bag held objects forbidden inside of this school, and that, I am sure, was no accident. And Mr. Potter, " She turned her steady glaze to him, "you only encouraged such behavior, and therefore you are just as guilty as Mr. Black." She sighed slightly. "Your detentions will be served tonight. Mr. Black, you will arrive here with Mr. Potter at seven o' clock and Mr. Black, you will continue to arrive here at seven o’ clock for the next three nights afterwards. A letter will be sent home to both of your parents informing them of your behavior." She looked at both of them evenly. "Now off you go." With that she turned to the work that was sitting on top of her desk and the two boys were left to trudge out of the classroom.
They met Remus and Peter, who were waiting patiently outside of the room for the two to return, outside of the classroom. They stopped in front of the two boys and tried their best to smile at them. All attempts at this simple act failed miserably.
"How bad is the damage?" Remus asked looking very concerned.
"We both have detention." James replied miserably.
"Yeah, well, at least you only have to do it for tonight. I have the next three nights with detention!"
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to do it." Peter whined pathetically, practically on the verge of tears.
James nodded, "I know." He said softly as Sirius just mumbled something unintelligible at the three of them and huffed off. James sighed, as he looked at Peter's red eyes that had begun to glaze over with the threat of tears as he watched Sirius trudge off without them. "It's okay, he'll get over it, in a few weeks."
"A few weeks." Peter moaned.
"Yeah, he tends to hold grudges but I'll talk to him." James looked at Peter once more. The boy kept staring at the place in the hall where Sirius had disappeared from view, completely miserable. "Trust me, it'll be okay."
Peter just nodded and they continued to walk up to Gryffindor tower. When they reached the portrait hole James uttered the password and they walked inside. Immediately, they were cornered by Christopher Weasley and his eldest brother, Arthur Weasley; head boy.
"Is it true what Chris says? Did you really let off a bag full of Dungbombs in Professor McGonagall's class?" The seventh year inquired.
"Yes." Peter stated miserably, unable to look up past the upper classman’s feet.
Chris smiled widely before stating an ever-so-proud "I told you so" to his older brother.
"Bloody brilliant! No one would ever cross McGonagall. She’s been here a few times for inspections and whatnot, and no one would cross her like you did!" He smiled widely at the boys. "Simply amazing."
"Brilliant?" Sirius' voice came from behind the two Weasley boys. They turned around to face him. "Peter blows up my bag and it's brilliant?"
The two nodded violently. "Of course, it takes guts to pull something like that...not to mention to even think about doing that in her class. McGonagall is quite a stickler, as you must have noticed. " The four nodded their own heads. "Well, no one would even think of something like that let alone do it! You guys are the prank masters!"
The four smiled widely as they exchanged quick glances. "We are, aren't we?" Sirius stated proudly before the two boys left, most likely to go spread the word around the school.
"That was definitely unexpected." Remus alleged. "You'd think we were heros or something, all because of a little accident."
Sirius just grinned thinking of the accident. The glimpse of a future for the four boys stirred in his brain as he walked over to the comfy chairs in front of the fireplace. The other three followed suit. They instantly began to talk about what had happened during their first lesson for the remainder of their free period. Eventually, Remus treated them all with his own little over dramatized reenactment of Sirius trying to extinguish his bag as the boys laughed loudly. Once he had finished Sirius looked over at Peter. "By the way, you owe me a new bag."