“I want to speak to James,” I say.
“Okay ... but does he want to speak to you?”
I pause. “Way to make me feel better, Remus. I love you too.”
“I didn’t mean it like that,” he insists, “I genuinely don’t know what happened.”
“Haven’t you been listening?” I burst out, angrily. Honestly, what is wrong with boys?
He sighs, wearily. “Yes. It’s just that you haven’t said anything coherent yet.”
I pause for a second or two. “Be quiet. Where’s Peter, anyway?”
“I don’t know, still in Hogsmead, I think. Probably with the ‘J’ word.”
“Jogging club? I know he’s a queer little being, but I never thought that jogging was his sort of thing,” I say, smiling half heartedly. At least I still have a sense of humour, despite running away from what could have been the beginning of my new life, and then finding out that my favourite centaur was kicked out of his herd because of me, and I still don’t know what will happen to him.
Oh, wait. There it goes.
“Let’s review,” Remus says. “Where were you before you came and found me?”
I sigh. “Hogsmeade. With James. We’d just seen Sirius and Iola making with the smoochies, and “”
“What? Sirius and Iola? Finally?”
I stare at him, incredulously. How many people knew about this? I mean, aside from James, who you would sort of expect what with him being her cousin. “Don’t tell me you knew she loved him all along, as well!”
“Of course I did. Everyone knew that.”
I narrow my eyes. “Just how publicised is her personal life, anyway?”
Remus laughs. “Oh, Lily. You and Iola are associated with the Marauders. Of course your private lives are publicised! We’re like ... The Rolling Stones. Cool, sexy, and hard rocking. Whereas L.O.V.E are annoying, drugged up hippies, like The Beatles! Don’t you know how this school works, yet?”
There were far too many shocking things he just said in those last sentences. I blurt out my feelings on all of them at once. “Of course I do! MY life is overly publicised, too? And anyway, I like the Beatles!”
Remus’s eyes widen at this last one. “Take that back.”
“No. What’s wrong with the Beatles?”
Remus shakes his head, pityingly. “You poor soul.”
I narrow my eyes again, but am still a little freaked out by the thought that people know things about my private life. “This is getting us nowhere. I miss James. When can I see James? Oh Merlin, I can’t see James. I’ve ruined our precious friendship. Remus, how did you let this happen?” I snap at him, knowing all too well that he had nothing to do with it. Luckily he doesn’t take offence. Either he’s used to dealing with hysterical and therefore irrational girls, or he’s just a really, really nice guy. Whichever one it is, it’s probably a good thing, because at the moment he’s the only person I have in the world who isn’t otherwise occupied, or probably hating me right now. Or a Centaur.
“All right, calm down. We’ll go and find James.”
“NO!” I cry, grabbing at his sleeve, my eyes wild. “Remus, you can’t! Please! I’d rather ... let’s go and see Hagrid, find out what will happen to Hallead. Come on, you come with me.”
“I don’t know if I want to go anywhere with a Beatles lover.”
I glare at him, and he laughs, following me as I storm off. I had gone back to Gryffindor Common Room once Hagrid left me in the Grounds you see, crying silently all the way. That was when I bumped into Remus, who was quietly doing some homework, having come back from Hogsmeade early. He was shocked at my state, and asked what was wrong, which is when I told him the whole sorry tale. Not that he understood a word of it, as it turned out, since I was sobbing violently at the same time. I’ve stopped crying now, though. Our discussion about various rock bands turned it into anger, although I suppose it’s not surprising that Remus is a Rolling Stones kind of person. He just seems to have that rocker status about him, beneath the studious, tired guy act.
We reach Hagrid’s hut in record time. Walking helps release your emotions, and I certainly have a lot right now. Let’s see: fear (for Hallead); despair (at my ruination of the friendship between me and James); anger (at Remus not taking it as seriously as he should); some happiness (at Iola and Sirius finding true love and all); and something else. When James and I had been about to kiss ... I kind of wanted us to.
“Back again?” asks Hagrid, when he sees me. He is outside, tending to Hallead, who is in the courtyard.
“How is he?” I ask, eyes wide, and worried. If Hallead’s life is ruined because of me, I don’t think I would ever be able to live with myself.
“He’s all righ’, I suppose. Doesn’t wan’ to be a bother, blames ’is manhood “ or horsehood, or whatever “ an’ ’e keeps asking if I think you’ll visit ’im.”
I smile, forgetting my worries about James for a moment. “I’m here.”
Hagrid looks at Remus suspiciously. “Aren’t you a Marauder?”
“Oh, I’m the smart one,” he insists, straight away. This is the claim that all four Marauders always make, even though they’re quite similar in intelligence. Or at least, it seems that way, because James and Sirius have a natural ability to be top of everything without even trying (much like Iola), Remus studies hard enough to keep level with them (much like me) and Peter gets so much help that he can achieve the grades he needs, if he wants to.
I speak to Hallead, and am surprised at how calm he seems to be. “Really, Miss Lily,” he says. “I’m absolutely fine. Don’t worry about a thing.”
And so, once I’ve spoken to him a little longer, we decide to leave. Remus is trying to convince me to speak to James, but I just don’t know. I mean, sure, if he understands why I ran away (although not even I understand, so it’s unlikely that he will) then that’s fine ... but if, as is more likely, he presumes I hate him ... what will I do?
“I’m sure if you just talk to him, he’ll understand why you did ... whatever you did. What did you do? I still don’t know,” he continues, looking confused again. Oh, I don’t have the energy to relive it all again ...
“Remus, to be honest, I just want to go to bed,” I say, simply.
“It’s the middle of the afternoon,” he points out, indicating the annoyingly bright sunshine.
“Do I look like I care?” I screech. All this emotion is really taking it’s toll. Bloody hormones.
“Of course not,” he says quickly, a little scared. We enter through the large oak doors, and begin to climb the stairway. We eventually go through the Portrait Hole and into the Common Room. A few people are beginning to come back from Hogsmeade now, although most are enjoying it while they can. However, James and Peter are sitting by the fire (although Sirius and Iola are nowhere to be seen). Remus goes over to them, and I feel James staring at me as I make my way across the room and up the stairs. It’s uncomfortable, but ... at least he’s not hurling abuse.
I push open the door to our dorm carefully, and blink. I blink again. The sight greeting me is inexplicably the same.
What was once my familiar, untidy, but well loved dormitory, has disappeared. Or rather, I can no longer see it. Because covering every inch of it “ the walls, floor, furniture, ceiling “ are large, thick, deep red roses. Bloody hell. A gesture for Eve, perhaps? No, none of the boys she dates would put in that much effort, they’re strictly a one-track-mind type. It can’t be for any of the other “Perfects”, that’s for sure. Iola, perhaps, from Sirius? But no, they’re not even back from Hogsmeade yet. So who?
A note flutters from the ceiling, folded into the shape of a flower. I snatch at it, and, ignoring it’s delicacy, tear it open. There, in loopy, curly, elegant red handwriting, are the words:
L “ I didn’t mean to scare you like that. If you are confused about the roses, here is my train of thought: in being unbearably clichéd on purpose, I am, in fact, being original. You see? “ J
No way. NO WAY. This is not happening.
I scrunch up the paper until my nails dig into my palms. I open my mouth, and scream, long and loud. Potter! James Bloody Potter! I don’t believe him! After everything ... after everything that has happened, he hasn’t changed a bit. All the frustration I’ve been feeling suddenly explodes inside me. I turn, and storm out of the room, down the stairs, and down into the Common Room.
“After all this time!” I screech, not caring that everywhere is silent. “All this time, and you just ... don’t ... learn! You’re not being original, Potter, you are being bloody annoying! I thought you knew! I thought that it had finally sunk in! I do not want to be bloody romanced by you! I do not want your flowers, and your love notes and your charm. So don’t try it! All right? No!”
There is silence. James is staring at me, his expression motionless. Eventually, he says, “So it didn’t work, then?”
I leave, going back upstairs, furiously. When I wrench open the dormitory door, I take out my wand, and levitate all the roses, then turn them so that they are all pointing, stem first towards the door. I banish them violently, so that one by one, they shoot down the stairs like bullets, and attack the three Marauders. I hear shouts of alarm, and fright, and cries to take cover. Room clear of sentimental gestures, I throw myself onto my bed and stay there. Time begins to trickle by as I listen to the chaos downstairs, although no one comes up to see if I’m okay. The sound of confusion and panic eventually lull back into the usual buzz of the Common Room, and presumably everything worked itself out. I feel Missy jump up next to me, and go to sleep.
Eventually, after what feels like years of lying still and wishing the world would implode, I join her, but am woken the next day by Iola hitting me over the head with a pillow. It takes me a moment to realise what is going on, but once I get my bearings, I mumble, “Gee, thanks.”
“You don’t deserve to be woken up by something as civilised as an alarm clock,” she informs me. Great. Now my supposed best friend hates me as well as everybody else. And how can she think of my alarm clock as civilised? It deserves to be shot.
I roll over to face her. “I’m sorry?”
“Sorry?” she hisses. “Sorry? What did you have to go and react like that for?”
Eventually, after blinking a few times in confusion, the whole sorry tale comes flooding back to me in one sweeping wave of distress. “You weren’t even there,” I point out, fairly.
“What does that matter? I was told all about it! Why, Lily? He was trying to be different than who he used to be, he was trying to be romantic. He really loves you Lily, and all you can do is “”
“Iola,” I interrupt, knowing by now the best way to avoid a lecture from my best friend. “Tell me about you and Sirius.”
Her tirade fizzes out immediately, as she jumps onto my bed and crosses her legs, grinning all over her face. “Oh, Lils, it was fantastic! We had a brilliant time, got along so well, and I think he really likes me! You know, I ... I’ve always kind of had a bit of a thing for him, I just never really mentioned it to you before ... you know all those poems I wrote? Well, they were all about him!”
“Yeah,” I say, glad that she is so happy. “I figured it out.” I decide not to mention that I was about the last person on the planet to do so.
She continues to gush about how great Sirius is for some time, and eventually I sort of tune out. Eve wakes up a little later, looking gorgeous the minute she steps out of bed, hair falling perfectly into place. It’s the most annoying thing in the world, especially when mine is a bird nest of frizzes and tangles, because I haven’t had the chance to brush it yet.
“Oh my word,” she says.
I turn and look at her, standing at the window with her hand over her mouth, ridiculous see-through negligee thing swirling all around her, gracefully.
“What?” I ask, intrigued.
She turns around to look at me, and sneers, immediately eradicating all innocent beauty from her face. “Find out for yourself,” she says, with far more contempt than is necessary.
I go to the window, and almost have a heart attack. Hundreds of heart shaped balloons are rising in the air, and as one passes close by the window, I see that they say, in an elegant handwriting print, “I love you, Lily Evans!”
“You have got to be kidding me,” I say. Iola comes up behind me.
“I guess he really meant it when he said he wanted to win you over in the corniest way possible, because that would make it remarkably original.”
“That makes no sense!” I cry out, horrified. “Wasn’t he listening to a word I said?”
“I think you’ll find that James bounces back rather easily, Lily,” Iola says. “Especially when he’s made up his mind about something.”
We take it in turns to shower, and then get dressed, before heading downstairs to breakfast. Good thing it’s a Sunday, I can try and avoid James as much as possible. If I’d had to have had lessons with him, too ... I think I would just have to stab something ... or someone.
We reach the top of the stairs going down to the Common Room, and Iola begins to laugh. What NOW? my conscience screams. At least it’s on my side for once. It doesn’t take long for me to work out exactly what charade James has concocted this time, however.
The staircase is covered in pink petals, and from our position, we can see quite clearly that at the bottom of the stairs are the words “I LOVE YOU LILY” spelt out with flickering candles. Bloody hell.
“I’ll kill him,” I mutter under my breath.
“I really don’t understand why you don’t see the funny side,” Iola says as we push our way through excited first and second years.
“Because it’s not funny!” I yell, angrily. Yeesh, Lily, he’s trying really hard. Stop being such a bitch and tell him how you feel. Great. So my conscience has turned traitor, too.
As usual, I decide to ignore it, and stomp all the way down to the Entrance Hall, which is luckily free of cheesy wooing methods.
But the thing is, when I see the Marauders sitting at the Gryffindor table flicking bits of toast at each other, I just ... smile. I catch Iola raising her eyebrows infuriatingly at me, and immediately transform my face back to it’s annoyed state. I march down towards them, and feel heads turning as I do so. But I don’t do anything to interest them, I just sit down calmly, and reach for the bacon. Missy jumps up beside me and starts yowling until Peter gives her the remainder of his sausage. Iola sits down carefully, looking from me to James and back again, obviously expecting some sort of duel to be challenged sometime soon.
Everyone seems to have realised that no entertaining spectacle is going to happen, and have gone back to their own conversations. Excellent news.
Without warning, I kick James in the shins under the table. “Ow!” he cries.
“You deserved that,” I hiss.
“Why?” he asks, hurt, his eyes round and formed into their long perfected puppy-dog stare. He won’t get me with that old trick this time ...
“Because I told you not to do what you’re doing last night, but you just don’t listen, do you?”
“Nope. Anyone will tell you that, Lily, just look at poor McGonagall. She still thinks I’ll change into Moony if I scrub enough bed pans,” he says, grinning, and Remus rolls his eyes, but doesn’t interrupt our heated discussion. Well, my half is heated. His half is calm, and almost jokey about the whole business.
“Just stop it, all right? I told you, I don’t want to be wooed by you.”
“So you won’t be wanting these, then?” he asks, taking out a huge bouquet from behind his back, with lots more red roses, and a single white lily in the middle. I narrow my eyes at it, and snatch it roughly out of his hands. I stand up, and people start looking.
“Lily ...” Sirius says, sounding worried. I ignore him, and hold the bouquet at arms length. With my other hand, I take out my wand, and set the thing on fire, in front of the whole school.
“And next time, James, it will be your head,” I tell him, sharply.
Sirius begins to laugh, and applaud, despite the shocked and tense atmosphere gripping the rest of the Great Hall. “Five hundred and eight Padfoot Points for that whole performance, Lily!” he cries, wiping tears from his eyes. “I think you’re winning!”
Iola slaps her hand over her eyes. “Just when we thought you’d forgotten, Sirius,” she says. He grins at her, and his eyes spark with something wonderful that “ the way things are going “ I will never see in anyone’s eyes when they look at me.
“I’ll never forget,” he says.
“Look mate,” James warns, frowning angrily. “Please don’t start snogging her, she’s like my sister. Once was enough for me.”
“Wait a minute ...” Iola says, turning to look at her cousin. “Once was enough? When did you “ oh my word, James Potter, were you SPYING on me?”
“I didn’t want to “” he starts to protest. I turn to walk out, and the beginning of an argument stops abruptly.
“Now look what you did,” Remus says, as I leave the Great Hall, but after that, I don’t hear any more.
I go out into the Grounds, and decide that I might as well go an visit Hallead. I find him outside Hagrid’s hut, lying down calmly and watching the birds some distance off. He looks content, like he wouldn’t rather be anywhere else, and I am happy that being kicked out of his own herd seems to have worked out for him.
“Hello, Miss Lily!” he says, brightly, and I don’t recall ever hearing him sound so cheerful before. “And how are you?”
I sit down next to him, and begin to tell him the story of James the annoying puppy, who just doesn’t want to give up. Maddeningly, he chuckles the whole way through.
“Lily, why don’t you just accept his offer?” he asks, once I finish. “It’s obvious he’s not going to go away until you do. And I thought you liked him, anyway?”
“I do,” I say, and realise that this is extremely true. “It just makes me so mad.”
“I think you should stop letting it make you angry, and see the funny side. After all, didn’t you say that everyone else seems to?”
It’s true. I say nothing.
“Oh look,” Hallead says, innocently. “Some people are coming.” I turn quickly, and see that it is true. At the front of the “ rather worryingly sized “ crowd, is James, walking confidently.
“Lily,” he says when he reaches me, and nods a greeting to Hallead also. “I’ve just come to say, that even though you don’t like my methods, the message is the same. I love you. I love you, and everyone here knows it.”
“But James,” I say, desperately. “Don’t you get it? I know you think you love me, but doing all this for me, it doesn’t prove anything, just that you’re not afraid of showing yourself up. Why can’t you just “”
I am interrupted. “Come on, Evans, don’t make me serenade you.”
My eyes widen in horror. “You wouldn’t.”
“I would.”
“I’m warning you, James “”
“You’re just too good to be true,” he sings, getting down on one knee and spreading his arms wide. Oh sweet Merlin. It can’t be happening ...
“James, please,” I beg, glancing around at the amused crowd of people.
“Can’t take my eyes off you,” he continues, with a surprisingly decent voice (although it wouldn’t win him any competitions). “You’d be like heaven to touch...”
“Stop it. I won’t listen to this!”
“I wanna hold you so much...”
“No! Shut up! Leave me alone!”
He stands up, dramatically, and begins to belt out unashamedly, “I love you baby, and if it’s quite all right, I need you baby! To warm a lonely night, I love you baby! Trust in me when I say ...”
This is too much. “James! It’s not all right! Stop it! You missed out a verse and a half! I get the message, okay?”
He just grins, takes a deep breath, and yells out, “Oh pretty baby, don’t bring me down, I pray, oh pretty baby! Now that I “”
“Silencio!” I screech, pointing my wand at him. He continues for a moment, and then realises that no one can hear him anymore. “Get lost, the lot of you,” I hiss at the crowd, and they begin to disperse. Only the Marauders and Iola remain, refusing to be gotten rid of that easily. I remove the spell from James.
He sighs, fun over now. “Lily, if you don’t want to be swept off your feet with my amazing romance tactics, what do you want?”
I swallow, and as I look into the face of James Potter, I realise exactly what my answer should be. I take a deep breath. “For one thing, I want to stand with my feet firmly on the ground. I just ...” Come on, Lily, now or never! Say it. Say it. Say it ... Say it, damn you! “I just want you standing next to me.” Oh, craps, I said it.
“Did you really just say that?” he whispers, his eyes going round with shock.
“I don’t know,” I squeak, shocked at myself. “Did you hear it?”
“Oh, I heard,” he says, stepping closer. He leans down slowly (who knew he was so tall all of a sudden?) and kisses me softly. My heart seems to explode, and things just seem ... well, right. We both break apart grinning for a moment, before I throw my arms around his neck and start kissing him again. If my past self could see me now ... When we step apart again, it seems that the crowd of people is surrounding us again. This school is nuts. And slightly perverted. My high spirits dampen when I see my three ex-friends practically at the front of the throng.
“Look, Val, Lia,” ‘Evie’ sneers. “Lily really is getting it on with Potter this time! She’ll probably get rabies.” I feel his hand gripping my arm, warning me not to relive the past and run away. He needn’t bother.
“Oh, I know,” I pout, as if I am about to add ‘isn’t it awful?’ Instead, I look into his beautiful, beautiful eyes, run my hand through his beautiful, beautiful hair, and say, “The things I do for love, eh?”
And then I lean towards his beautiful, beautiful lips and start kissing them.
Again.
Because seriously, who wouldn’t?
AN: *Happy smile which turns into choking sob* How did this happen? I’m still in denial a little, this was my FAVOURITE fic to write. I LOVED writing this fic! *Composes self* All right, I’m fine. The lyrics in this chapter were from the song Can’t take my eyes off you by Frankie Valli. It was released in 1968, according to my sources, so it’s possible James heard it one holiday at home ... we already know that he’s not afraid of Muggle culture away from Hogwarts (we learnt that in chapter 10) so I don’t see a problem. Besides, it just seems like the sort of thing he would sing to Lily ... the words and music just seem to fit his character, wouldn’t you say? Congratulations on reaching the end of The Things I Do For L.O.V.E, it’s been a good ride, full of twists, turns and trickery. I would like to thank (as always) my best friend, Chomione, for being there no matter what, and my brother CheeseKing for letting me read these chapters aloud to him so I could wheedle out mistakes (not that it ALWAYS worked, but hey). Thanks to anyone who beta-d (ForbiddenLove and Twizzle_loves_Lupin), and to Vindictus Viridian for accepting these chapters, and helping me if I needed it “ couldn’t have done it without you. And, of course, thank you to ALL of my reviewers, I love you guys so much! And don’t stop now, because I want to know exactly what you thought about it all! Favourite character? Quote? Scene? Chapter? Chapter name (I had so much fun thinking them up)? I have lots of other fics up (seriously, lots) so don’t be afraid of checking them out. And you never know ... maybe something new will arise ...
**Pussycat123**