Disclaimer: Starsky and Hutch was probably the most well known show in the 70s (as far as my not-very-extensive research can show), which is why I used it here. I did not make it up (obviously) and do not own it either. I also use a quote from Macbeth, which, of course, belongs to William Shakespeare (well, it’s not like he can sue me himself, so to whoever has that power, I admit it’s not mine!). While we’re doing a disclaimer, may I also remind you (as if you need reminding) that anything Harry Potter related isn’t mine either. Now. On with the thing that you actually came here to read ...
Chapter 9: Too Much Can Happen In One Short Day
So. What’s the best way to start a letter to your ex-friends, explaining that you are leaving the group you have been a part of for six years, instead preferring the company of the girl that the group famously doesn’t like?
Dear Friends? Dear Ex-Friends? Dear Bitches? Dear Monkey-Faces Numbers One, Two and Three?
Well, this is going well. I don’t even know how to start it.
“Don’t start it with anything,” Iola suggests, looking over my shoulder at the blank parchment. “Just get straight to the point.”
It’s a good idea. But where do I start then?
“‘It’s Lily, just letting you know that I’ve seen past the fakeness of L.O.V.E, and you can manage without me for now’?” I ask her, since she seems to know what to do.
“Of course not, fakeness isn’t a word.”
I groan, and slump forwards on my desk. So far this is proving to be hopeless. Missy jumps onto my lap and purrs. I can’t help but stroke her, and it makes me feel a little better.
She’s good at that. Right, if I don’t know how to start it, I won’t, I’ll just get straight into it, and then use a copying spell three times over. That will show them.
I am writing to let you know, that I feel it is time for us to move on. We’re older now, and it’s time I found some new friends. I guess I’ve never felt entirely comfortable with L.O.V.E, even if I’ve only just realised it, and I will be spending my time with Iola from now on. I’m sure you will be able to keep up your reputation without me. We’ve had good times in the past, but I have come to realise that it was never real.
I’m sorry that it’s ending this way, but I hope we are mature enough to be ... well, mature about it.
Lily.
Oh, Merlin, what have I done?
Iola comes in from having a shower (it took a long time to write such a short letter, I deliberated over every word). She has borrowed some of my clothes, and they fit her okay, but don’t quite suit her “ I’m sure she’d prefer to be wearing something black. She sees me sitting at my desk, hyperventilating.
“Remember to breath,” she says, drying her hair with a towel. I can’t help laughing, but it doesn’t last long.
“They’re going to hate me,” I say. I hear her sigh.
“Well, at least they don’t hate me or anything ...” she says, sarcastically.
“But you don’t care!” I protest, since I know that if you had lived like she had, I’m sure some silly girls not liking you wouldn’t really bother you.
“I’m just saying, that it really doesn’t matter what they think. Let them write you in their little hate book or whatever, let them put your picture on a dartboard, it doesn’t matter! As long as you’re happy.”
I don’t think I want to be on anybodies dartboard, but I guess I see her point.
“Now, just duplicate it a couple of times, and send them with my owl, if you like. Just let me write something to James, so I can explain stuff.”
It takes a total of two hours before the replies start flooding in. That’s express for you.
From Eve:
Lily!!! How could you do this??? Are you sure you’re okay??? You aren’t menstruating are you??? Because if you are, I think we should be able to forgive you eventually for this little joke. Because it is a joke, right??? I mean, you’re not serious, right??? Think of what we’ve done for you!!! You were an ugly, quivering wreck when we first met, and now you’re a presentable, human being!!!
I hope you haven’t forgotten that.
xXx Eve xXx
PS: Amos Diggory asked me out again. Do you think it would count as an on/off relationship after we’ve been out seven times in total???
This one starts to convince me that I have made the right decision. I mean, seven times? Does she have any self respect at all? And those kisses around her name? I never noticed before how annoying that is. Or the excessive use of punctuation. Does she think it will make her point more valid sounding, or something? It’s just irritating.
From Ophelia:
Lily, are you sure you’re okay? Is this about that time we told you that Iola was planning to do something to you with James? Because I’ll admit, that was a little underhand. But really, how could you do this? You’re menstruating, aren’t you? I guess that would explain it. I’m sure Eve will forgive you once you’ve explained that it’s all hormonal. And, of course, when you’ve given her that new enchanted perfume that’s just come out, as a token of apology. She’s quite forgiving, really. I mean, she’s going out with Amos for the seventh time, I think that proves that she can forgive people easily. Right?
Ophelia
PS: Olivia is driving me mad, she has this totally perfect and gorgeous new boyfriend. Mum and Dad keep mentioning that I’m currently single, and I feel horrible.
The Post-Script on hers makes me feel a little guilty, since that does sound quite bad. But the fact that she too, thinks that I am only doing this because I’m menstruating is quite annoying. I mean, I can do things rashly without hormonal influence, thank you very much!
And from Valerie:
Very funny, Lily. But you’re not that stupid. Unless, of course, you’re menstruating. In which case, you know, all is forgiven. Hey did you know that Eve is going out with Amos AGAIN? Seriously. I hope they break up by the end of the summer, I hate it when we have to watch them slobber all over each other. You’d think that she would have some dignity. Am I right? Oh, and before I forget, could you send me your notes on Vanishing Charms? I usually get one of my brothers to do my homework, but they’re all out being stupid, so it would be quicker if you did it. I mean, I have to practice Quidditch to keep my game up, or I will look pathetic next to that damned James Potter. Speaking of the Potters, do you really think that I would fall for that joke you sent out?
Valerie
PS: Don’t forget those Vanishing Charm notes.
Another one who blames my menstrual cycle. I think this is the most unbelievable of the letters. She’s so ... flippant. Maybe I’ll miss Eve’s gracefulness from time to time, and I’ll certainly miss Ophelia now and then, because she can’t help having an impressionable older sister, but I’m sure not going to miss Valerie. I mean ... She’s so insensitive.
I don’t read the reply from James, but Iola does, and snorts with contempt.
“What?” I ask her.
“Oh, James is just being a bit of a ... well, never mind.”
“It’s because it’s me you’re staying with, isn’t it?” I already know the answer. Ever since that day in Hogsmeade, it’s possible that my detest of him is actually matched by his abhorrence of me.
“Well ... yes. He was merely irritated with you last year, but then something happened near the end, and ...”
“He hated me again?”
She looks shocked. “He never hated you, Lily! He was completely in love with you! I didn’t have a clue why, myself. Remember that bet? Well, they only did that so he could ask you out without feeling stupid. If it looked like they were ALL asking an L.O.V.E girl out, he wouldn’t be on his own. But you never said yes, and then in fifth year, you both had that massive fight. After that, he was actually going to try and grow up a bit, but you kept reporting them for every tiny thing they did. Like I said, mostly he was just irritated, but suddenly he changed completely. When you asked if I was all right, and he had a huge rampage over it for no reason? Well, after that, he just seemed to ...”
“Hate me?” I finish for her. She shrugs. I feel an urge to tell her what really happened. “Iola ...” I start, tentatively.
“Yes? What’s wrong?”
“Um. That day when James told you he had a big rage for no reason? Well, I wasn’t just asking how you were. I asked him if you had trouble at home. Because of that comment you made. And he said that it wasn’t my business, but I kept insisting, so that’s why we both got so angry. I think ... he made it out to you that he got angry for no reason so that he could protect you. You know?”
“Really? It was ... it was kind of justified, is what you’re saying?”
“Well ... yes. And I realise now that I shouldn’t have meddled. I don’t blame him really. He was just protecting you.”
She seems flattered that he would make himself sound stupid just to protect her. “That’s ... I guess, that was good of him. You see, he’s not the selfish pig you think he is. If he would make himself look like an idiot for his cousin, imagine what he would do for the girl he was completely in love with ...”
“I hope you’re not referring to me. Even if you could convince me to like him, I’ve blown any chances we have. You know how much he doesn’t like me. Just take that letter he’s written.”
Iola looks down at it, and grimaces. “I guess so. But I always kind of thought you would make a good couple. Well, not at first. But when I got to know you, I did. You’d balance each other out.”
“Well, I don’t mind too much that he hates me, really. I’ve never been too hot on him, trust me.”
With that, I turn towards the desk, and begin writing replies to each letter from L.O.V.E, explaining that no, I’m not menstruating (yeesh), and yes, I really am leaving L.O.V.E. Iola also writes a slightly angry letter (but softened by her revelation about how far he went to protect her), saying that ... well, I don’t know what it said, but I presume she said that she doesn’t care what he thinks, because she’s staying.
I demonstrate the TV to Iola while we wait for replies. She was particularly impressed by Starsky and Hutch. And who wouldn’t be? That many explosions in one show? The cops themselves get on my nerves a little, but who wouldn’t love that car? Lily, you’re going on a tangent again! Get to the point, dammit!
Ah, how I love these reminders my conscience feels its necessary to give me. You’ve got to have some verbal abuse to get you through the day.
You’re still not getting to the point! What’s wrong with you?
Okay, fine. James sends his reply, and it’s very short and to the point. I sneak a look at it (yes, I’m a bad person) just out of curiosity.
Iola,
Fine. Do what you like. We’re coming back in a couple of days anyway, so you won’t have to stay with her long.
Your cousin,
James.
Ps “ Sirius says hi. He’s having fun out here in Greece, you’d think he’d never had a change of scenery before. It seems he gets high on it.
That settles that then.
“Have the others not written back yet? They can’t be sulking, surely?” Iola asks, a little later, as we’re still crashing out on the sofa.
“I don’t know. They’re more malicious than that, though, so I don’t think so. Ophelia is the only one who ever sulks “ and it’s usually Valerie’s fault “ but the other two ... they’re more the look-like-sweetness-and-light-but-they’re-actually-planning-on-stabbing-you-in-the-back types. And Ophelia would go along with it if they told her to.”
“Your hand, your tongue: look like the innocent flower, but be the serpent under't,” Iola says, more to herself than me. “Macbeth,” she explains, when she sees me looking.
“When did you read Macbeth?” I ask, impressed.
“Remember all those summers spent avoiding my father? How I said that sometimes I’d go to the Muggle Library?”
“Oh, yeah.”
“You see? I’m much more well versed in Muggle literature than you might think!”
“I never doubted you for a second, Iola!” I say, grinning, putting on a mock-shocked face.
“That’s funny, because I did,” she says, grinning back.
“You doubted yourself, or me?” I ask, laughing. There’s a name for this. Banter? We never did it in L.O.V.E, we had most of our laughs being bitchy. Which, when I think about it, probably wasn’t the best form of humour. But this is fun.
“Both, I think,” Iola replies, laughing back.
“Good to know we can be honest,” I say.
“Lily! You have a visitor!” It’s Mum’s voice. Visitor? Me? Please don’t let it be that creepy stalker guy from across the road. He spends most of his time in his bedroom, but sometimes I see him looking out the window with binoculars. Not just at our house, but at everybody’s.
Please, please, please, please, please, PLEASE, don’t let it be him.
Are you going to stand there drivelling, or actually find out who it is?
Actually, I’d rather stand here drivelling. What if it is the stalker guy? He scares me!
Why would it be him? He doesn’t even know you!
Oh yeah. Well ... maybe he really was spying on me the whole time, and he’s come to molest me.
Just go already!
I give in, and go into the hall to see who might want to visit little old me. Don’t let it be Stalker Guy. Please, please, please, please, please “
“Eve?” I cry. And there she is, blonde hair flowing, little pink and blue flowers in her hair, which match her little sundress “ a pink one, with a little blue flowery pattern. She also has one large white flower in her hair, I guess to pick out her knee length white high heeled boots, and small white bag. As always when her presence is thrust upon me without warning, I suddenly feel immensely inadequate and self conscious, in my boring jeans and t-shirt. She is standing, examining her perfectly manicured nails. Petunia is in the kitchen doorway, with her mouth open, jealousy burning in her eyes. Eve looks up when I say her name.
“Hello, Lily. I came to speak to you about your letters.” Her eyes meet mine, and they flash dangerously, despite her sweet-as-candy smile. I almost shiver. “Ophelia and Valerie are coming too, but they might be late.”
Petunia rushes forwards. “H-Hi “ I’m P-Petunia, and I ... I’m Lily’s s-sister.” It’s kind of pathetic. I mean, really. She’s fawning over Eve like a puppy in love. Thank goodness I don’t have a brother ... imagine the drool.
There is a knock at the door, which I presume is Valerie and/or Ophelia. It’s both. Valerie has a purple tennis dress type thing, and Ophelia is in a skirt and little t-shirt. I don’t want to be mean or anything, but she looks so much younger than us “ like a little girl playing at dressing up.
“Uh ... Eve said you wanted to talk about “”
“Your insanity? Yes, she would be right,” Valerie cuts in, a nasty edge to her voice.
“Now, I’m sure we can come to some sort of mature arrangement, and no one needs to get cruel.”
“Are these really your friends?” Petunia asks breathlessly, in awe at so much beauty, as she now stares openly at Valerie’s perfect figure (it’s all that exercising) and her striking attractiveness, what with the dark hair and eyes, and rich bronzed honey skin. Okay, so Ophelia isn’t a natural beauty, but Petunia is still impressed.
“Do you actually have a reason to be here?” asks Valerie, nastily. I don’t feel too annoyed by her tone, though “ she has a point.
Petunia scurries away.
Iola comes out of the living room. “Oh, it’s you guys. We were wondering why you hadn’t replied,” she says. All three purse their lips at exactly the same time, and for a moment, I wonder bizarrely if they practise synchronicity in the mirror.
“So it is true, Lily,” Eve states, accusingly.
“That’s what I was telling you,” I point out.
“We thought you might be menstruating, but I guess not,” Ophelia tells me.
“I’ve been telling you that consistently for quite a while now! Look, we had some good times, and you helped me come out of my shell, I’ll admit that. But I think it’s time I moved on. I just don’t think ... I don’t think I want to be in your company any more. It’s just not working.”
“Is it something we’ve done?” Ophelia asks, sounding a little hurt.
“Not ... not exactly. It’s just ... I feel a lot more comfortable with Iola.”
“Why? She’s a freak!” Valerie cries, angrily. Something inside me snaps. Which is never good.
“You see? This is why I don’t like you guys! You can’t just say something like that, and then expect to get away with it! Especially you, Valerie! I mean, is your brain even connected to your mouth? You even do it to your friends! The times Ophelia has been almost in tears, and I’ve had to go and comfort her, because you don’t think about what you’re saying! And Eve “ you’re nearly as bad! You manipulate people to get what you want, and then you pretend that you’re sweetness and light! And you’re all so vain! You don’t need to be up at five in the morning to go and run round the lake, Valerie “ I mean, what are you trying to prove? And Ophelia, I know you’re overshadowed by your sister, but you’ve got to let go, and live your own life! You don’t need to be up in the morning, going through a huge beauty routine, when you would actually look a lot better if you didn’t bother, because you’d be more natural. And Eve, you are beautiful, but you don’t have to flaunt it over people, you just make them feel inferior! And “ And “ Look, I’ve said my piece. Thanks for being my friends, but it’s time we moved on. There are more important things in life than how you look “ what about trying to be a better, more interesting person? What about doing some good in the world?” I come to a halt, breathless. Valerie looks angry, but I don’t care. Ophelia looks hurt, and I feel bad, but not bad enough to take it back. Eve’s face is completely blank, and I can’t work out what she’s thinking. This scares me most.
Eventually, she turns and walks out of the house without a word. Valerie sneers at me, and says, “I hope you have fun with your new friends “ you can forget being one of us ever again.” And she leaves.
Ophelia is left. There are tears rimming her eyes. “Ophelia, I’m sorry. Look, I can still be your friend if you need me, you don’t have to cut me off completely.”
“I’m sorry, Lily. But I think I do. Thank you for your opinion on us. I, at least, will take it to heart.” She turns to leave.
“I’m sorry it ended like this!” I say, just as she is about to close the door behind her. It pauses for a moment, and slams.
What have I done? What have I gone and done now? Deep breaths, Lily, in and out. It was all for the best.
“But what if it wasn’t?” I ask, aloud.
“Wasn’t what?” Iola asks, and I remember that she’s still standing there.
“For the best,” I say. She thinks for a moment.
“Well, that’s up to you to decide. But you’ve said it now, and I don’t think that they’ll let you take it back. But do you really feel sorry or upset that it’s over?”
I don’t answer straight away. But slowly, I come to realise, that I don’t. In fact, I feel ... relieved. I feel free.
I turn to Iola, and smile. “No,” I say. “I don’t.”
AN: Don’t panic! It seems like it could be, but this is not the last chapter, there is still more to come! Lily has a long way to go yet, my friends, and so do the people around her. So, what did you think? How’s that for an ending to a friendship? Are you happy, or angry? Please review!