Leaning back in his desk chair, Percy stifled a yawn. If the clock on the wall was to be believed – and he wasn’t sure it was – he had been working for fourteen hours straight. “Time to go home,” he muttered.
Of course, it was well past time. Everyone at the Ministry was working longer hours now that the wizarding world knew that He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named was back. Even so, Percy was the last to leave tonight by more than two hours. Another flaw in Percy’s statement was that he wasn’t really going home. He hadn’t been home since last Christmas, and even then he wasn’t welcome. Percy sighed at the memory.
He couldn’t go home, at least not until Voldemort was defeated. He couldn’t go home, because of Dumbledore. It seemed that many troubles in his life came because of that man: that man who may or may not be dead. The rest of the wizarding community appeared to accept Dumbledore’s death as factual, but Percy wasn’t so sure.
The previous Headmaster of Hogwarts rarely, if ever, lied - at least not directly. Oh no… he had others to do that for him. Including me, Percy reflected with a touch of bitterness. He knew Dumbledore was not above faking his own death.
Which brought Percy’s musings to Snape.
He doubted the Potions Master had really betrayed the Order. Sure, Harry Potter, the only eyewitness to the scene who had not fled, thought so. Sure, the rest of the Weasleys thought so. But then again, they thought the same thing of him. And the Boy-Who-Lived had been wrong about Snape before.
All of this came back to Dumbledore. Didn’t it always?
If anyone could understand Snape’s position, it would surely be Percy.
After the disastrous Tri-Wizard Tournament, Percy was in quite a bit of trouble at work. He had downplayed Crouch’s absence for months. And, okay, he may have told a lie here and there.
“Oh, yes sir, I saw Mr. Crouch with my own two eyes. He’ll be up here in no time.”
“It’s just because of that old house-elf of his. He hasn’t been the same since he had to dismiss her.”
“He’s on the mend for sure.”
Percy had kept up a stream of excuses. When the truth had come out, he thought he would never find work again.
Instead, within a few weeks, Cornelius Fudge approached him, offering a promotion. Percy could hardly believe his good fortune! He had gone home proudly, expecting nothing but congratulations, and maybe a little envy, from his family. By the end of that night, he had left the Burrow, renouncing his family and Dumbledore. The nerve of his father! To suggest that Fudge merely needed a spy was not only preposterous but downright insulting. Had he not worked hard to prove himself? Had he not overcome his father’s reputation?
Sitting at his desk, Percy’s face flushed at the remembrance of his thoughts during that time. At the time, he had conveniently managed to shut out the fact that he really didn’t deserve a job in the Minister’s office. At first, Percy had not understood Fudge’s annoyance at his falling-out with his family. Months passed before Fudge’s true intentions became painfully clear: Percy’s father had been right. Fudge needed an insider’s knowledge of Dumbledore’s actions.
In the meantime, Percy’s betrayal of his family had not ended with that one incident at the Burrow. He had turned his own mother away from his apartment. He had ignored his father every time they saw each other at the Ministry – including at Harry’s trial. He had even written to Ron and told him to sever all ties with Harry Potter. Thankfully, his brother had promptly ignored him. After finally seeing the truth about Fudge, Percy wanted nothing more than to return to his family.
Broken, Percy had turned to the one person he thought could help him: Dumbledore. Dumbledore promised redemption. More than a year and a half later, Percy scoffed at the very idea. Redemption… All he had received so far was disappointment and rejection.
The Headmaster “generously” forgave Percy for his lack of trust. He even offered him a position within the Order. Elated, Percy accepted the offer immediately, not bothering to find out what it was. Dumbledore wanted someone to spy, so spy Percy had. On the Minister of Magic, no less! Percy agreed to stay in his job and feed Dumbledore information, first from Cornelius Fudge and then from Rufus Scrimgeour when he took over Fudge’s post. The catch was that Percy could not reconcile with his family.
Thus, Percy felt that he could understand much of Snape’s frustration. Dumbledore had rescued Snape from the side of evil, offered him a position in the Order, and sent him right back to where he was before, now as a spy. Except in Percy’s case, he had not been rescued from the side of evil, exactly. It was more like… indifference. Snape and Percy had both realized their error before the downfall of their leader. Both were now distrusted by both sides but continually promised freedom and redemption. Percy couldn’t help wondering how many other people Dumbledore controlled through their debts to him.
When Percy had first heard of Dumbledore’s death, he felt horribly guilty about the relief that had lurked in the corners of his mind. Maybe now he could return to his family! Less than a week later, however, a note from Professor McGonagall showed up in Percy’s in-tray. Although she had not taken over all of Dumbledore’s duties nor been privy to all of his secrets, Dumbledore had written a very long letter to her to be opened in the event of his death. From beyond the grave (maybe, Percy reminded himself again), Dumbledore was directing his actions again. Rather than being done with spying, Percy’s information just went to McGonagall instead.
On nights like this, when Percy was exhausted and lonely, he sometimes thought that his biggest regret wasn’t trusting Cornelius Fudge, but trusting Albus Dumbledore.