“Tonks...” she started.
“What? What’s wrong?”
“Nothing is wrong, dear. You’re pregnant.”
______________________________________________________________________________
Pregnant... Pregnant! I thought that night. This can’t be happening! Not that it was a bad thing or anything, but I was so worried about the possibility of me raising a child alone. It scared me to death.
I thought about this all day as I taught class. But when it came to last hour, which consisted of the seventh year Slytherins and Gryffindors, I couldn’t stand listening to them fight back and forth. So I gave them a silent study period. That didn’t last long.
“Ow! Bloody hell, Goyle , quit it!” Sean snapped.
“What? I didn’t do anything!” Goyle responded.
“Yeah, ya did! Ya threw something at me!”
“Did not!”
“Did too!”
“Enough!” I shouted over them. “I said this is a silent study session.”
Goyle gave me a resentful look, but they both fell silent.
I slouched in my chair and put my head in my hands. I was exhausted and scared. I had no idea what would happen. I didn’t know if Remus would come back any time soon. I couldn’t tell him that I was expecting, even if I could write to him, it would make him feel bad, he’d feel like he would have to come back immediately.
“Professor?” someone said softly.
I looked up. “Yes?”
“What’s wrong with your hair?”
I looked in a mirror and noticed my hair was slowly fading back to my natural, ugly, mousy brown hair. It was also slowly losing it’s spike, as it began to sadly fall limp against my face. I was getting to stressed out, and my power was beginning to suffer.
It’s all his fault, the voice said. He left you like this. You know it. He did this to you. He left you, and now you’re going to have to raise his child all on your own, Nymphadora, and you know it.
“Professor?”
“I’m just a little stressed out, is all,” I told whoever was asking questions.
That night, at dinner, I asked McGonagall if I could speak to her in her office later.
“What’s going on, Nymphadora?” she asked once we were inside.
“I need to speak to Remus,” I blurted out.
“It’s a little dangerous to contact him right now,” she fixed me with the all too familiar stern stare I used to get as a student.
“I know... but it’s important.”
“What is that important?”
“I’m... I’m pregnant...” I said softly, looking at the floor.
“You’re acting as though this is a bad thing.”
“I just need to tell Remus.”
“This isn’t a bad thing, you know?”
“What if I have to raise the child on my own? Then it’s a bad thing.”
“But you won’t have to. Write a letter to Remus, I’ll send it out in the morning.”
“Thanks...”
I left the office and went back to my own room. I sat at the desk and pulled out a piece of parchment and a quill.
Dear Remus,
Something’s happened... Something good... I’m pregnant.
“No.” I crumpled up the paper and started a new letter.
Dear Remus,
Great news!
“No!” I crumpled that letter too.
Dear Remus,
I’m pregnant, it’s your fault and you’re probably not going to make it back to help me take care of it, thanks, the voice said.
“No, no, no!”
Dear Remus,
I wish I could have told you this in person, but this will have to do. It’s nothing bad. In fact, it’s great! I’m going to have a baby! I just found out today, and wanted to let you know as soon as I could.
I hope everything is alright over there. Hope I see you soon!
Love,
Tonks
I didn’t put in the little bit about me having troubles morphing. I didn’t want him to get upset, so I tried to make the letter as light-hearted as possible. I knew he would feel guilty leaving me alone right now, and that the child might inherit Remus’s “curse” as he calls it.
We had talked about having children before. He told me he was worried about hurting a child. When I told him we would keep that from happening, he asked what would happen if the kid was a werewolf.
Remus hard time finding work and fitting in because of his... disability, and he didn’t want to make anyone else go through that. We had discussed adoption, but never decided on anything.
For a minute, I considered not sending him the letter at all, but I knew he needed to know, so I folded the letter and took it back to McGonagall’s office.
______________________________________________________________________________
Dear Remus,
I wish I could have told you this in person, but this will have to do. It’s nothing bad. In fact, it’s great! I’m going to have a baby! I just found out today, and wanted to let you know as soon as I could.
I hope everything is alright over there. Hope I see you soon!
Love,
Tonks
She’s pregnant. Tonks is pregnant.
I couldn’t get those words out of my head as I read that letter.
What if I didn’t get back? What if the child wass a werewolf too? What if I couldn’t keep a job? All these things were problems. I knew she wouldn’t want me to get upset or feel guilty, but I did.
I love her and I want her to be happy, and she wants to have children but...
“What’s that?”
My train of thought was interrupted by another werewolf, she was pointing at the letter from Tonks.
“Nothing, Kris.” I stowed the letter into my pocket and turned to look at her. “Don’t you have something else to do?”
“No. I’m kind of bored.”
“Well go find something else to do,” I told her firmly.
“There is nothing else to do,” she whined. “C’mon. Tell me, who’s the letter from?”
I didn’t exactly trust her. She was new around here, newer than I was, and she didn’t seem like the type of person who would keep a secret well. She hadn’t shown a side yet, but I didn’t think she was all that bad. If she was tortured though, I was certain she would give me away.
“I told you. It’s none of your business.”
“Aw, c’mon, Moony. Please?”
I used to nick name underground, I was afraid if I gave away my real name, people would get suspicious.
“No, Kris.”
She pouted at me. “Fine.”
She reminded me of Tonks some times, especially because she was persistent as hell.
I pulled out the letter and read it again. I traced Tonks’ signature with my finger. She used pink ink. It looks like she was nervous. There are a few dots on the left side of the D in ‘Dear”, like she wasn’t sure how to tell me. Or if she should have told me at all.
“Love Tonks. Who’s Tonks?”
Kris hadn’t gone away, and she had scared the crap out of me.
“Damn it, Kris!” I shouted.
“What?” she asked, her eyes big and pleading.
“You scared me.”
“Oh... sorry. Who’s Tonks?”
There was no way around this one. “My... a friend of mine.”
If anyone found out we were married, they’d target her to get to me.
“A friend who you got pregnant?” She raised her eyebrows at me.
“What makes you think I got her pregnant?”
“They way she wrote to you. It’s not too hard to tell, Moony. Or should I call you Remus.”