Of course, that didn’t mean giving up his time with Sirius, Remus, and Peter. As the first week of school ended, the quartet lounged outside by the lake. James quietly and confidently informed his friends of his resolution to get over Lily Evans and move on with his life. He was met with an assortment of blank stares, raised eyebrows, and brazen guffaws. Nevertheless, he told them, he intended to ignore Lily Evans and concentrate on school, Quidditch, and his Head Boy duties.
James kept his resolve and didn’t insult Lily Evans once the entire first month of classes. His plan seemed to be going well until his N.E.W.T. level Potions class one Friday morning near the end of September. As usual, Evans produced a perfect Befuddlement Draught, and Professor Slughorn fawned all over Lily and her bubbling cauldron, calling out praises for the rest of the class to hear and envy. James couldn’t help but glare at her, completely forgetting that he was supposed to be ignoring the one girl who vexed him more than any other. The potion he was tending abruptly turned a sickly shade of pea green and exploded in a puff of putrid smoke, coating James in a sticky substance that resembled apple jelly. The class burst into fits of laughter, and Slughorn glanced at James with a small smile on his face as he ruefully shook his head. Sirius was practically rolling on the floor, and even Remus’s shoulders were silently shaking with laughter.
Storming out after class, James ignored Sirius calling after him and quickly walked the other way, his head down and shoulders hunched. He could not, however, ignore the other voice he heard.
“Oi, Potter!” called Lily Evans, a smirk on her lips. James stopped and blew out a breath. His first month of trying to move on, and he had finally blown it: he had let her get to him, all over a stupid potion and a few meaningless words from Slughorn. “What’s wrong, can’t handle N.E.W.T. level Potions this year? Or can’t handle being Head Boy?” she taunted, her green eyes laughing at him.
James turned and gave her his best look of blank disinterest. “I wasn’t paying attention,” he replied blandly with a dull shrug. Inside, he was fuming. He didn’t know if he was more upset at Lily Evans, or at himself.
“What?” she asked, widening her eyes and feigning surprise. “That’s all? No clever comeback from the great James Potter?”
“Go stick your nose back in your cauldron, Evans. I’m tired of entertaining you with my exceptional wit and talent. I need to clean up before Transfiguration.” James turned to leave and was surprised to see that a crowd had gathered in the corridor around them. They were apparently quite interested in watching one of the legendary confrontations between James Potter and Lily Evans. Sirius was standing against the wall with his arms crossed in front of him, grinning. He leaned over and whispered something to Remus, who tried to stifle a laugh but failed. James shot them a look of complete disgust; so much for their support.
Lily had noticed the other students watching as well. She narrowed her eyes at James, apparently unwilling to give up so easily with such a large audience. “I think you look better covered in green slime, Potter,” she called rather brightly. “It makes your big head look smaller.”
She was clearly baiting him, and in front of half of seventh year; he couldn’t let her get away with it. He was over her, after all, so it wouldn’t hurt to have one last go at her, especially since he usually came out on top in their verbal spats. James turned and slowly walked back to Lily, looked down into her eyes, and waited. “Green’s not my color, Evans,” he finally decided. “Reminds me of a certain redhead wanker and her beady little eyes.”
Lily turned a deep shade of red, but took a breath to calm herself. “Hark who’s talking, you big, blind berk. Your mug reminds me of one of Hagrid’s flobberworms.”
“Good one, Evans,” James said, forcing a laugh. He felt his own face starting to flush. It had been over a month since they had had a good row. On one hand he found it exhilarating, but on the other he was surprised to find that her remarks were actually getting to him this time. “Did you come up with that yourself, or find it in one of your books?”
“At least I can read a book, Potter,” she snapped waspishly. James knew she was touchy about her studies, but felt strangely empty for hitting his mark. “I don’t need my friends to do it for me.”
“Hey!” called Sirius, a smirk ruining the innocent look he tried to pull. “Don’t drag us into it. I hate reading.” There was scattered laughter throughout the corridor. James shot his friend another look of loathing.
“At least I’ve got friends,” James snapped back, knowing she did as well, but saying it anyway. “Books are a poor substitute for fun.” She didn’t seem much for fun as far as he could tell, even if she did have friends.
Apparently he had touched a nerve; Lily paled and drew her wand. “Prat!” she shouted, advancing furiously on him as several girls joined her, their eyes narrowed dangerously at James. Remus and Sirius stepped up, flanking him on either side, and James was glad they had ignored his earlier glares.
James raised an eyebrow and glanced down at Lily’s wand, trying to keep his composure even though he knew he had gone too far. The thought occurred to him that they were Head Boy and Girl and should probably be setting a better example for the other students. More importantly, James found himself reluctant to hurt her anymore. “Go ahead and try, Evans. You don’t have a chance, you’re not””
Without warning he found himself flailing in the air, dangling above the stone floor by one foot. “ ”fast enough,” he gasped, then cast a silent spell of his own. Lily was suddenly hanging upside down next to him, sputtering incoherently. Their friends backed off, letting the two Heads settle it themselves as they covered their mouths and tried to hold back their laughter.
“You are the biggest git I have ever known!” Lily hissed as she flung her long red hair from in front of her face and struggled to hold her robes up. For good measure she threw a few more derogatory names at him, surprising him with her colorful language. James was unexpectedly struck by how beautiful Lily was when she was angry. He also realized that he did not want to give up on her after all: that even when she yelled vile insults at him, she was still the most amazing girl he had ever known.
“I know,” he said when she stopped for a breath. “I can’t help it, you drive me crazy.” He floated closer toward her, the blood rushing to his head, his thoughts going places they probably shouldn’t. They were almost face-to-face now, hanging upside down in the corridor. The hallway was ringing with laughter at the inverted verbal duel, but James hardly heard it. He was entranced by Lily’s lips, in spite of the daunting words coming out.
“I do not!” she snapped as James floated still closer. “It’s not my fault if you can’t get it through your thick skull that I will never, ever, as long I live, go out on a date with you, I swear, so help me””
James stopped her with a kiss, and the world seemed to explode. He took her face in his hands, and kissed her with all the passion that every one of their fights brought out in him. It was perfect, more perfect than he could have possibly imagined. And he was going to give up on her? Never.
“Don’t make a promise you can’t keep,” he whispered into her ear. Abruptly they both fell to the ground. James felt the air rush out of him as Lily landed hard on top of his chest. She didn’t jump up immediately, but looked into his eyes with an expression of surprise and something else James was stunned to see. He felt his breath catch in his throat. To his shock, she kissed him back, long and hard, before pushing off him and kneeing him solidly in the stomach.
“It was never a promise, Potter,” she said softly. “Just a principle. I don’t date cads.” She stood, perfectly composed, whereas James felt his face burning and his heart racing. After straightening her robes, Lily smoothed her hair, gathered her books, and strode off with her head held high. There were claps and whistles, and she regally inclined her head as she passed. She gave James one last wink before turning the corner with her friends.
Sirius stepped over and helped James stand, clapping him on the shoulder with a grin. “What just happened?” asked James, slightly dazed. The crowd began to break up, still laughing.
Sirius shook his head. “I’d say she just stuffed your ego down the toilet, mate. She totally got you that time.”
James watched Lily walk away, his thoughts a jumble, his lips burning where they had kissed. “Yeah, I guess so. How about that.” He was still too stunned to say much else.
“But you did kiss her,” Remus pointed out, handing James his books with a grin of his own. “So I’d call it a draw, actually.”
“Good thing you’re over her,” Sirius teased as they made their way back to Gryffindor tower.
James turned to Sirius. “Who said I was over her?”
“You did,” replied Remus, affecting a proper voice as he mockingly quoted James’s word back to him. “‘I am no longer interested in that witch of a woman named Lily Evans. She can take her stupid red hair and stuff it in a sock.’” He winked at Sirius. “You were very eloquent, and very adamant, if I recall.”
“Can you imagine what he might have done if he still liked her?” Sirius asked Remus, ignoring James completely. “He might have caused a scene, embarrassed himself or something.”
James snorted, and his friends broke into laughter again. He didn’t care. They could make fun all they wanted, but they had not kissed Lily Evans. They had not felt her respond, nor seen the look on her face when she fell on top of him. James knew that she liked him; she just needed to admit it herself.
“Hey, flobberworm,” called Sirius. “You still with us or are you off chewing lettuce? What are you going to do now?”
“About what?” James replied, feigning ignorance even as he tried to think of a good answer.
“About Lily,” answered Remus. “You kissed her in front of half the seventh year. She’s going to be furious with you.”
James grinned. “Maybe, but she did kiss me back.”
“She kicked you in the gut, Prongs,” laughed Sirius. “That doesn’t sound like love to me.”
James was silent as he absently rubbed his stomach; he was too busy thinking about the whole scene. He wanted to remember it forever, in case Remus was right and she never spoke to him again. Yet something told him that wasn’t going to happen. He just needed to figure out how to get Lily to realize he wasn’t so bad after all. He needed a plan.
Lily Evans couldn’t make up her mind; she had no idea what to do about James Potter. It had been several days since the disastrous Potions class which had ended with a rather awkward yet enjoyable kiss in the hallway. Potter hadn’t even looked at her since; she was surprised and somewhat disappointed that he hadn’t made any kind of comment, snarky or not, and found herself dwelling on it far too often.
It was late Sunday afternoon, and Lily sat by the window in the Gryffindor common room, alternating between staring blankly at her Charms text and glancing out the window toward the lake. Potter was out there with his friends, lying on the grass working on an essay. She smiled when she thought about the grass stains he’d find on the back of the parchment, then shook her head at the odd thought and returned to her Charms book. Yet she couldn’t help it when her gaze strayed back to the window, and her mind wandered again.
James hadn’t actually talked to her for almost a month before the fiasco outside of potions: no taunts, no teasing, no dramatic appeals to go out with him on bent knee. She had reluctantly found herself thinking about him over that long month, and had finally admitted that she missed his constant attention once it was gone. When she had caught James staring at her in Potions, Lily couldn’t resist starting a row after his potion exploded in his face; it was what they did, after all. It was familiar territory. She just hadn’t expected it to end the way it had.
Looking down toward the lake, Lily watched James work, wondering what it might be like to kiss him again. Suddenly he glanced up, and she knew he had seen her watching. She felt her cheeks color and quickly returned to her book again, silently cursing James Potter and the things he did to her. After a few minutes she couldn’t help but look out once more, and to her disappointment, he was gone.
An unexpected pecking at the window drew her out of her musings. She looked up to see an owl waiting patiently on the windowsill. She opened the window to let the owl in, and to her astonishment, the tawny bird landed on the back of her chair and held out its tiny leg. She took the rolled parchment, and motioned the owl out the window. Frowning, she examined the tight scroll, wondering who it could possibly be from. She opened it, her heart racing inexplicably.
Lily,
I’m sorry about what happened after Potions on Friday. I need to talk to you. Meet me in the common room tonight at midnight?
James
Lily stared at the paper, her heart now thumping loudly in her ears. It was the first time James Potter had ever communicated with her in such a straightforward and honest way: no sarcasm, no drama, no trying to impress her. How could she say no, after what had happened?
At dinner in the Great Hall, Lily looked up to find James staring at her. He smiled”a genuine smile, not his usual cocky one”and gave her a questioning look. He was rather handsome when he wasn’t acting so arrogant. She nodded and smiled back. She noticed Remus Lupin glancing back and forth between them and quickly turned back to her friends.
Lily didn’t see James in the common room that night. As she doubted he was in the library, she assumed he was in his dormitory. It occurred to her that he might be plotting something with his friends, setting her up for a spectacular prank, and she considered not meeting him later. Yet she wanted to see him again; she needed to talk to him. As the room began to clear out, Lily found herself unable to concentrate on her Transfiguration essay. With a loud sigh, she finally put it away and found an empty chair by the fire. Soon she was alone and began to fall asleep. She dreamed she was floating upside down in a potion of green liquid, and James Potter was throwing socks into the cauldron.
The portrait hole opened just after midnight and Lily woke with a start. To her surprise, it was James Potter. Apparently he hadn’t been in his dormitory, he had been in the library after all. She felt slightly guilty for underestimating him and assuming the worst. Maybe he was really trying to do better this year.
“Hi, Lily,” he said, standing uneasily in front of the fire. Lily noticed immediately that he had dropped the ‘Evans’ moniker he had been using for years. She was surprised at how much she liked hearing him say her first name for once.
“You’re late,” she replied, somewhat at a loss for words, falling back on their familiar routine of picking at each other in order to find her footing in an unfamiliar situation.
To her amazement, he didn’t snap back. In fact, he looked nervous, and that made her worried. What was he planning? He surprised her again by pulling a beautiful red flower from behind his back.
“Sorry, I had to sneak into the greenhouses for this,” he said, handing her a rose with another genuine smile. The flower began to change color, growing into a delicate pink that probably matched the blush that Lily felt creeping up her face.
“Thanks,” she murmured, still unsure of what was going on. “How did you manage to slip out there without getting caught?” He raised his eyebrows at her, and she laughed. “Right, of course. You have your ways, I shouldn’t have even asked.”
“Actually, I’m glad you did,” James replied. “Come on, I’d like to show you something.” He held out his hand, and she stared at it, her eyes going wide.
James snorted. “Not that, Evans,” he said, rolling his eyes and reverting back to their usual method of addressing each other. “What kind of guy do you think I am?”
“You’re the biggest git I’ve ever met,” she answered, standing on her own.
“So you’ve said,” he replied dryly as he motioned her toward the portrait hole. "And a cad as well." She held back; she did not want to be caught sneaking around the castle so late, Head Girl or not. It would be even worse to be caught with James Potter. He seemed to read her mind and pulled something from his robes.
“It’s okay, no one will see us,” he said, shaking out a silvery cloak. Lily gasped as he flung it around his shoulders and disappeared, then reappeared with a grin on his face. “Now you know the secret to my success,” he winked at her. “It’s how I got your flower.”
“I can’t believe this,” Lily exclaimed, taking the strange material in her hand. “James, Invisibility Cloaks are exceptionally rare. Is this how you have been sneaking around all these years then?”
“Don’t tell Sirius I showed you, he’ll hex me a new pair of”ears,” he finished, flashing her another lopsided grin. “Come on, I want to show you something.”
“So you said.” Lily was curious now. When James held out his hand again,. she took hold and let him drape the cloak over them both. He led her through the portrait hole, helping her step through without tripping. She wondered who this strange person was, who only a year ago would have delighted in jinxing her or insulting her at every opportunity. Yet tonight he held her hand tenderly, and didn’t say a word as they walked through the silent castle and onto the grounds.
James led her toward the black lake, to a spot under a large oak tree opposite the Forbidden Forest. He took the cloak and set it down on the damp ground, then motioned for her to sit. She sat down hesitantly, curious and skeptical and nervous as he joined her on the ground. To her continued surprise he sat down on the other side of the cloak, his knees tucked up to his chest.
The moon was a thin sliver, and the sky was clear. Bright starlight reflected off the waters of the lake, illuminating the grounds with a blanket of soft color. Lily waited for James to start, since he had brought her out here.
“Hippogriffs like to fly when the moon is waning,” he finally said. “You can see them from here, circling over the forest. They have an intricate mating dance. I thought you might like to watch them.”
“It’s lovely,” she said, somewhat confused. Care of Magical Creatures was certainly not one of her strongest subjects, the mating dance of the hippogriff something she had not planned on ever studying; still, she had to admit it was a beautiful night. A light breeze rustled through the leaves of the oak tree, and the sounds of crickets and owls fluttered about on the gentle wind.
“I’m sorry about what I said after Potions,” James said suddenly. “I don’t know why I even said some of those things.”
Lily laughed softly. “Of course you know why”it’s what we do.”
James turned to look at her, the starlight bouncing off of his glasses. Lily expected him to start running his hand through his hair at any moment, like he usually did to impress her. Yet he still seemed nervous and looked away before he answered.
“Yes, it’s what we do.” Lily heard him sigh. “I had planned on not doing that anymore””
“What”mocking me, jinxing me, and generally making my life miserable?” she interrupted, trying to sound light. It was exactly what he did, however, and it had driven her crazy for years.
James laughed, and she thought he sounded bitter. “Yes, all those. Those things we do. I certainly didn’t plan on . . . on kissing you like that, in front of everyone.” She heard him swallow, and he finally looked at her again. “I’m sorry.”
Lily didn’t know what to say. He looked so vulnerable, and sounded so genuine, but she knew what James Potter was capable of, and though she wanted to trust him, she still had her doubts. He had brought her outside in the middle of the night to watch a Hippogriff mating dance, after all. He had been nothing but a gentleman, but the night was not yet over.
“I’m sorry I jinxed you,” she said, not addressing the kiss.
“It’s okay, I’m used to it,” he grinned, and she laughed. “You were quick, I’ll give you that.”
“It’d been a while,” she retorted.
“I know,” he said softly, retreating again. “I told you, I was really trying to avoid another row like that.”
“How come?” she asked curiously, watching his face and staring at his lips. This new side of James Potter was something she had never expected, and she reluctantly had to admit that she liked it quite a bit.
James shrugged. “I made up my mind to focus on classes, on being Head Boy. I decided to get over you.” He turned to look at her again, his face very serious, his eyes very bright. “But I can’t. I want to stop thinking about you, but I can’t, and I don’t think I ever will.”
Lily felt her breath catch in her throat. She wanted to kiss him again, like she had after Potions, but something still held her back. There was one thing she had to know, one thing she had to understand, before she walked down that road, because somehow she knew there would be no turning back.
“Why?” she whispered, both dreading and hoping for the answer.
James was silent for a very long time, and Lily began to panic; maybe there was no reason, and he was just toying with her feelings. Maybe it was a prank after all.
“I love you,” he finally answered. “Ever since our first fight after Charms during fourth year, I think. It’s always and only been you, Lily.”
Lily felt her chest constricting; she didn’t know what to say, because she wanted to laugh and cry and run away and snog him like crazy all at once. She bit her lip, trying to control her racing heart, as James stood and began pacing.
“I thought I could stop thinking about you, but I couldn’t,” he said, his voice confused. “I don’t know what happened after Potions”why I said those things, or why I kissed you. But after Friday I decided the best thing to do was just to be honest, because I really am tired of entertaining you, Evans.” He knelt in front of her and took her hand. He had the most earnest and sincere look on his face that Lily had ever seen. “We’d be great together, Lily. I know you’d like me, if you just gave it a chance.”
Lily stared at him, her breathing ragged. “I already like you,” she whispered, finally admitting the truth to them both.
“What?” he asked, stunned. “You do?” She nodded, holding back tears. He jumped up and pumped his fist in the air. “I knew it!” he crowed, then knelt down in front of her again. “No one jinxes a guy like you do without feeling something.” She burst out laughing, and he grinned. James took her hand again, then moved to her face. He traced the contours of her cheeks, her nose, and her eyes. “You are so beautiful,” he murmured.
And then he kissed her, finally and fully. It was the kiss she had been longing for ever since the debacle in the corridor, ever since they had come outside. At first tender, soon they were embracing fiercely, their passion rolling over them at last. They fell to the ground, her hands entwined in his hair as he kissed her lips, her forehead, her neck.
Suddenly an assortment of small fluffy objects rained down on them from above. Pulling away, Lily picked one up and saw that it was a pair of red socks.
“James, someone is throwing socks at us,” she said very calmly. The wide-eyed look on his face caused her to break into fits of giggles. He sat up quickly, looking around with a furious expression.
An assortment of catcalls and jeers reached Lily’s ears, and following the sound she saw three heads poking out of a window near the top of Gryffindor tower. They were tossing more socks as they laughed, and Lily knew it was Sirius, Remus, and Peter. She shook her head and smiled as James jumped up, obviously irritated. He drew his wand and sent a stream of yellow light toward the window before turning back to Lily again. The three faces disappeared with more laughter.
“I am so sorry!” he said, breathless as he sat down next to her again and finally ran his hand through his hair. “I had no idea, I didn’t tell them a thing, honestly””
Lily put a finger to his lips and kissed him silent. “It’s okay,” she said after much too short a kiss. “Really, it is.” She picked up a pair of socks and cocked an eyebrow. “You’ll have to explain it to me sometime, though.”
James stammered, and she laughed again. “You know, between the two of us we should be able to come up with something good.” Lily watched him with a sly look in her eyes.
“For what”oh,” he said, and grinned. “We should be able to come up with something great,” he amended.
“We’ve had a lot of practice,” said Lily, eyes twinkling.
“They won’t know what hit them,” added James. He laughed joyfully as he kissed her again. “I told you we’d be great together.”
Lily knew that he was right, and they began to talk about their future together, starting with their first prank on a several unsuspecting Gryffindors.
* * *
A/N: This story actually started out as a drabble for the weekly challenge on resolutions in the Three Broomsticks. When I couldn’t cut it down to five hundred words, I decided to expand it to a one-shot. It exploded to this, yet somehow I also managed to condense it for the challenge as well! I had a lot of fun with this story, and I hope you enjoyed it as well. Thank you to myownmuggle for her great beta work on this story, and to J.K. Rowling for letting us play with James and Lily’s romance in so many ways.