A/N: I’m sorry for 1) the lateness of this chapter! It won’t happen again! 2) the shortness of this chapter and 3) for the cliffie at the end…insert evil laugh here!
Lily was working in silence, grabbing the silverware from the drawer on her left. Five forks. Five knives. She hesitated for a second, her hand hovering over the knives. Could she actually trust Sirius and James with sharp objects? They should be fine. Both used knives all the time at Hogwarts without any problems. Wait…had there ever been a problem? Lily suddenly gasped, skipping over the blades hastily, as she remembered…
-Flashback-
All four Marauders were glancing at each other eagerly; it was April 1st”what they thought of as their own national holiday. With exact opposite expressions, the teachers were looking at each others in uneasy dread. Having spent four April Fool’s Days beforehand with the Marauders, they knew something was up, and it was something big…it always was. With each teacher on edge, the air was alive with excitement; everyone could feel the anticipation building. The students had on a mixture of expressions. Most looked eager, others nervous, and some just downright scared. They knew what day it was, heck who could forget it?
James checked his watch and smiled almost manically. Sirius mirrored his expression and began tapping on the side of his glass with his knife. Every head turned towards the notorious pranksters. Dumbledore stood up, his head inclined towards Sirius politely.
“I believe Mr. Black has something to say,” he said, his blue eyes twinkling.
“Yes, I do,” Sirius began, a wide smile on his face. “I just wanted to remind everyone that today is April 1st. And you know what that means!” He grinned while Remus, Peter, and James sniggered in the background.
“Mr. Black! There is no need for another ridiculous prank!” Professor McGonagall began to scold, standing up quickly and almost losing her hat in the process.
“Actually, Minnie,” James was now talking, his eyes glinting mischievously. “We’ve decided not to do one big, April Fool’s prank this year.”
A snort came from down the Gryffindor table and every head now turned towards the red headed girl.
“The day you stop pranking on April Fool’s is the day I’ll go out with you, Potter. That means never in case that thick thing you call a head didn’t comprehend my use of sarcasm!” Lily Evans said, rolling her eyes at James in annoyance.
“Miss Evans, please refrain from showing your disdain for Mr. Potter in public!” Professor McGonagall reprimanded sharply.
Many students laughed quietly, sniggering things along the lines of “Like that will ever happen!” and “You’ll have to remind her again after she slaps him!”
“Evans, does that mean you’ll go to Hogsmeade with me since we really aren’t doing a prank”” James started excitedly; ignoring McGonagall’s warning and running his hand through his hair.
“NO!” Lily yelled.
“OY! Everyone, I believeI was the one talking until this git next to me interrupted my amazing speech!” Sirius jerked his head at James who was too busy staring at Lily to notice the insult. Sirius glared around at everyone before continuing.
“Now! Where was I? Oh yes, Prongs just told you we weren’t doing a prank this year, well, he is correct.”
Groans of disappointment, shouts of outrage, and cheers followed this statement.
James stood up next to Sirius, his eyes sparkling. “Padfoot here is correct. We aren’t doing one huge prank this year…” he paused dramatically, looking at each of the four House tables.
“WE’RE DOING PRANKS ALL WEEK!” Peter shouted happily, unable to stand the wait.
“PETER!” yelled the other Marauders in unison.
“What did I do?” Peter asked. The Marauders just groaned before Sirius suddenly grabbed his wand, waving it at all four tables.
“Wingardium Leviosa!”
People screamed as the knives soared from where they were resting on the table. With a flick of his wand, the blades were barreling towards the Slytherin table. The green robed students shrieked in horror as they dived from their seats. The knives struck the table with a thud, quivering as they came to a stop. The Slytherins cautiously picked themselves up from their position on the floor. The entire school could read the words formed by the knives.
HA! HA!
There was a bang, followed by more screams as a cloud of thick scarlet smoke flooded the Great Hall. As the smoked cleared, the students could see that the knives were no longer trembling on the table. Instead, each Slytherin had been pinned to the back wall by the knives. Peering closer, the students could just make out the words the students had formed.
LIONS FOREVER!
Even as Professor McGonagall and the other teachers cried out in anger, there was another explosion and soon, all the Slytherins were on the ground, each holding a knife. They glanced at the silverware in surprise as each knife seemed to melt before changing into a bouquet of flowers.
Suddenly every Slytherin was singing as James pretended to conduct them.
“You're just too good to be true.
Can't take my eyes off you.
You'd be like Heaven to touch.
I wanna hold you so much.”
A swarm of green had surrounded Lily Evans. She stared at them in horror.
“At long last love has arrived
And I thank God I'm alive.
You're just too good to be true.
Can't take my eyes off you.”
“STOP!” Lily screeched, her cheeks becoming redder and redder with each word the Slytherins sang.
“Pardon the way that I stare.
There's nothing else to compare.
The sight of you leaves me weak.
There are no words left to speak,
But if you feel like I feel,
Please let me know that it's real.
You're just too good to be true.
Can't take my eyes off you.”
Abruptly, the lights went out before a single spotlight came down, resting on Severus Snape. He cleared his voice once before breaking out into a solo; the rest of his House swaying to the rhythm.
“I love you, baby,
And if it's quite alright,
I need you, baby,
To warm a lonely night.
I love you, baby.
Trust in me when I say:
Oh, pretty baby,
Don't bring me down, I pray.
Oh, pretty baby, now that I found you, stay
And let me love you, baby.
Let me love you!”
He dragged out the note until James swiftly finished his role as conductor. The lights flashed back on. Lily continued to gape at Snape in horror until she snapped her head around to see Remus carrying a white card on a gold pillar. A small knife was holding it in place.
“For you, Miss Evans,” he said, projecting his voice throughout the Great Hall. He gave Lily the pillow before murmuring, “Sorry, Lily, but you know how James is.” Then with a bow, he marched back to his seat. Lily wrenched the knife out of the card, aware of the thousands of eyes watching her. Her eyes scanned the little piece of paper before narrowing in utter contempt at the words.
“Though your words always slice me like knives, I can’t take my eyes off of you. Let me love you…later tonight.”
James was grinning cheekily at her, his chest puffed out in pride. Lily took one deep breath as if she was just clearing her head. Then…she exploded.
“YOU ARE THE MOST EGOTISTIC PERSON IN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE! YOU WANT TO SEE ME REALLY SLICE YOU WITH SOMETHING OTHER THAN WORDS? HOW ABOUT I START WITH THIS KNIFE…MAYBE IT WILL FINALLY DEFLATE YOUR HEAD!” She was screaming uncontrollably. Red splotches had appeared on her cheeks and her eyes were blazing with a wild fire. James’s eyes widened, at first, with shock before a real fear seemed to fill them. The next second found James running as Lily chased after him, until with a simple flick of his wand, Dumbledore had both Lily and James sitting in detention, knifeless…
-Flashback Ends-
“Lily! Earth to Lily…LILY MARIE EVANS!” Petunia yelled, waving her hand back and forth in front of Lily’s face. Lily jerked back from the motion, surprised. She blinked a couple of times to see Petunia’s annoyed expression. How long had she just been zoning out for?
“Well now that little-miss-I’m-lazy-and-don’t-have-to-do-any-work is finally back to normal”” Petunia paused. “Oh wait, I forgot, you will never be back to normal because you’re a freak!”
Lily just ignored her before turning back to grab the napkins. Silence once again came over the two sisters until Lily began to hum, once again unable to take the quiet. Why did everything have to be so hushed around Petunia? The silence was killing her! She hummed louder, trying to bring some noise into the room. She went around the counter to the table, located to the left of the kitchen. It should be big enough for all of them, right? She did a mental count before setting the table. Yes, they would all fit. She placed the napkins down, positioning the forks on top of them. Petunia shot Lily an irritated glance as she checked on the chicken. Lily ignored her, increasing the volume of her humming again before suddenly pausing. Why was it so quiet? The Marauders, especially James and Sirius, were known for their love of noise. So why didn’t she hear anything when James and Sirius were just two rooms over?
“Would you shut up with the humming already? You’re driving me insane!” Petunia snapped, placing her hands on her hips.
“Umm…let me think.” Lily pretended to deliberate for a second. “No.”
“You are the most impossible being I have ever had the misfortune to meet!” Petunia yelled, throwing her hands into the air in exasperation.
Lily bowed, replying cheekily, “Why thank you!”
Petunia gave a sound of frustration before turning back to prepare the food. After a few more minutes, Lily finally stopped her song and instead cocked her head towards the family room. Still, nothing.
“I think I’d better go check on James,” Lily told her sister before turning to leave the room.
“Why? It’s not like he’d ever check up on you.”
Lily whipped back around, taking a deep breath in an attempt to reign in her temper.
“Petunia, think what you may,” Lily took another deep breath, “But James and I love each other.”
Petunia stared at her for a second before erupting into peals of laughter. “L-Love each other? You and J-James?” She cracked up again while Lily stared at her impassively. “You’re too young to know about love!”
“And you do?” Lily shot back angrily.
“I”uh”of course I do,” Petunia answered though a bit of hesitation followed the statement.
“Then tell me, Petunia. Explain to me how you know you’re in love because I know what I feel and it is love!”
“Vernon”I-I”uh”I just know!” Petunia finished defiantly.
“Really? Are you sure? Does your stomach turn flips at the slightest glance at him? Do pleasant shivers run down your spine at his smile? Does it feel like you could never be cold again because this warm feeling overwhelms you? Is that what you feel because that’s exactly what I’m like whenever I’m around James Potter!”
“I”well”yes,” Petunia was stammering.
Lily raged on. “Do you feel yourself smiling at his every movement? Feel like even a day away from him is killing you inside and out?" Lily pressed on, ignoring Petunia’s uncomfortable expression. “When he takes your hand, do you never want to let go? When he hugs you, do you feel perfectly safe, as if just being in his arms will protect you from all danger? Do you float into heaven as he kisses you? Feel like every inch of your skin is on fire with his slightest touch? Does your heart turn somersaults and pump faster when you and he are together? Tell me, Petunia. If that’s not love, then what is? Please, go right on ahead and explain to me what love feels like!” Lily finished, breathing hard as if she had just come back from a long run.
Petunia was silent, just staring at Lily, her mouth trying and failing to form words. Lily just nodded her head sadly, whispering so quietly, Petunia could barely make out the words. “You don’t love Vernon, Tuney…and you know it.” Lily began to turn out of the room, salt and pepper shakers in her hand, before she paused. “And don’t you ever doubt my love for James. Because there’s no way I could ever live without him.” And then she left the room, leaving Petunia alone.
Lily continued down the hall before entering the family room. She froze at the sight that met her eyes. The salt and pepper shakers hit the ground with a thud as Lily’s hands flew to her mouth. What had they done? What had James and Sirius done?
A/N: I know this wasn’t as funny as my other chapter but I’m saving it for the next one…oh will you be in for a surprise!
Questioning the Freak and the Whale by Phenioxsong22
Chapter Notes: Disclaimer: J.K. Rowling owns everything Harry Potter related and Frankie Valli owns the lyrics.