“Harry,” Ginny said breathlessly. She hadn’t been alone with Harry in at least a year, but she had to get her point across and stop staring. His hair had become more unruly, she could have sworn he had sprouted up another inch or two and his voice was different, yet the same. She could have recognized it anywhere, but it seemed much more mature than it had in their school days, and it was something that she wasn’t prepared for. “I got your letter,” she started.
“What letter?” Harry questioned as Ginny came in and Harry closed the door behind her. The slam of the large door at 12 Grimmauld Place echoed through the room, closing out the noise from the harsh weather on the other side.
“You mean it wasn’t from you?” A look of hurt, confusion and speculation passed over Ginny’s face.
“Ginny, I haven’t sent you a letter since we were at Hogwarts,” Harry said, hating to see her with that face. She was more beautiful than she had been when he had last seen her at Bill and Fleur’s wedding. She had been wearing the exact same look then because he had told her that it wouldn’t be good idea for them to dance together. It wasn’t the look that he was picturing on her face. He was picturing her face as he was about to kiss her in the Gryffindor Common Room, or the face she wore when they were sitting on the edge of the lake, just thinking. Though the hurt face she wore at this moment was not foreign by any means, it was the look that he had always tried to keep off her face; and so far he wasn’t doing a great job.
“You’re sure?” Ginny asked, hoping for a different answer this time, even though she wasn’t expecting it.
“I really wanted to, Ginny. You have no idea how much I wanted to,” Harry answered. “But with the war, it wasn’t worth the risk.”
The face was still there.
“Oh, I see,” Ginny replied, sullen and now looking at her worn trainers.
“Is that all you came here for?” Harry asked, hoping it wasn’t. He had been hoping for a moment like this ever since Bill and Fleur’s wedding, but had never gotten it and now he was throwing it away.
“If you’re sure that you didn’t send me a letter,” she paused and he nodded. “Then, yeah.” What Ginny was going to say to him didn’t matter anymore, not if the letter wasn’t from him.
Ginny headed toward the large front door, praying in her mind that he would stop her. Harry did think about it. He thought about stopping her, grabbing her arm and snogging her senseless and never letting go. But he just couldn’t do it. Instead, Harry followed, and just as he was going to close the door behind her, she stopped it with her hand. Harry became hopeful that she was staying, but was soon disappointed.
“Oh, and Harry?” She had to speak loudly over the thunder.
“Yeah?” Harry’s voice was heard effortlessly over the roll of the thunder.
“Good luck, you know, with everything.”
“Thanks,” Harry said as he waved and closed the door reluctantly behind her.
Ginny just kept staring at the gold door knob. Then her eyes moved to the plants just beside the door, her feet and body not moving. The green off of the leaves was intensified by the rain. Her eyes unfocused, imagining Harry’s eyes and that is when her face became wet. It wasn’t because of the rain, but because of the tears that were now falling from her eyes. With this she turned around and started to walk toward the sidewalk back to the no-risk world in front of her. It was a world where she was less likely to get hurt by the war, but a world without Harry. It was where she was supposed to be safe, but she still knew she wouldn’t be.
Harry closed the door and the reality of what he had just done hit him. He had just sent the girl he loved and wanted to be with more than anything out of his life. Again. He thought, ‘I haven’t written her a letter since….’
And then Harry froze. That day so many weeks ago flooded his mind. His misery, the letter, and how he had lost it. What he had written and if she had read that, and instantly Harry felt like the worst person in the world. Ginny had mustered up the courage to come here and talk to him and he hadn’t even realized what she had wanted to talk to him about. He hadn’t realized the extent of the dreaded look on her face. Who else could have sent her that message? Dean Thomas? Michael Corner? Had they ever had with Ginny what he had had? He doubted it and shivered at the thought. He had put that doubt in her mind and now she must be so confused.
Harry opened the door and looked out at a soaked Ginny, walking slowly down the street to get out of Muggle view so she could Apparate. Harry left the no-risk zone of 12 Grimmauld Place and started toward the sidewalk where what he wanted and what he needed met.
Ginny heard a door slam. She glanced behind her and saw a person with black hair running toward her. She stopped her slow pace and stood and stared, waiting for Harry to catch up. When he finally reached her, his glasses were covered in water and so was his thin face.
“Ginny, I completely forgot. I did write you a letter, but I never ever meant to send it. Hedwig must have picked it up or something,” Harry said as he looked straight into Ginny’s eyes, daring her not to return his gaze.
“So you didn’t mean it? Oh, that makes me feel loads better! You know what, Harry? Maybe I didn’t mean to come here. Maybe I just came here to, to break your heart and leave.” Ginny now was practically hysterical, and turned out of Harry’s grasp.
She was beginning her defiant walk away from him, when he pulled her back.
Once she was looking at him, he said, “Gin, I meant every word.”
And then his lips were on hers. A year of pent-up passion and longing was pouring out into their kiss. They were both already so wet, that when it started raining even harder, neither of them noticed. After not seeing or talking to each other, the moment seemed unreal. Then, Harry began thinking, ‘What if someone sees us?’
“Follow me,” Harry said huskily after he had set her back down on the ground. She nodded obediently and took Harry’s hand as they half ran back to headquarters.
Harry opened the door, pulled Ginny through the opening and then slammed it shut. Ginny leaned back against the door and Harry placed his hands on either side of her.
“Now, where were we?” Harry asked, his face a foot away from hers.
Ginny put her fingers in his wet messy hair and pulled him toward her so their faces were an inch apart and said, “Somewhere around here.” Then their lips crashed together again. Ginny and Harry’s tongues clashed and they both clung to each other, not willing to let go.
But then the voices in Harry’s head went off again. What if Voldemort finds out? He thought as he half pulled away but Ginny moaned and pulled him back in.
It’s not like I’m going to snog Ginny or take her out to eat right in front of him. he answered back rationally, throwing himself into the kiss again.
But he has spies everywhere. Someone would find out and tell him, the nagging voice in his head reminded. Harry kept kissing Ginny as his brain tried to think of away to challenge it.
I’ll protect her, he replied proudly.
But what if you get killed? the voice said again.
She’s more important, he answered and pushed himself deeper into the kiss.
One girl is more important than many innocent lives? the voice asked and Harry ripped his lips away and stepped away from Ginny.
“I DON’T KNOW!” he answered the voice out loud while running his hands through his hair and pacing in front of an awestruck Ginny.
“What?” Ginny replied, slightly annoyed.
“I mean, I love you!” Harry said to Ginny, still pacing. Ginny just stared and got the expression he loved back on her face. He had actually said out loud that he loved her, and she couldn’t quite get over it. “Which means I should stop being selfish and I should protect you, even if I rip my heart apart in the process,”
Harry stopped pacing to look at her. Damn those eyes, Harry thought looking straight into Ginny’s eyes, the ones that always seemed to translate her emotions. They always made Harry feel as though he didn’t have control over anything anymore.
Ginny reached up and starting kissing him again. Harry began deepening the kiss, but then pulled away.
“This is crazy!” he said as he began pacing again.
“Look at us, Harry! It’s obvious that we want to be together!” Ginny shouted.
“But I can’t do something stupid to save you!”
“So saving me would be stupid?”
“No, Ginny, you know that is NOT true,” Harry said, now looking her square in the eye. “I would die to save you.”
“Well, what do you mean then?” she retorted.
“I mean that no matter how much I want to risk my life to save you, it wouldn’t be fair! I told you the prophecy at Bill and Fleur’s wedding when you asked why we couldn’t be together! I HAVE to kill him to save innocent people like your family or Hermione’s parents!”
“I guess that makes sense…” Ginny answered reluctantly, not even sure that it was a question that needed an answer.
“But,” Harry had begun pacing again. “We obviously can’t not see each other. I mean, look at us. I hate not seeing you whenever I want. And I’m pretty sure you feel the same.” Now he stopped again and was looking deep into Ginny’s eyes.
“Yes,” she stated simply, looking back into his emerald green eyes with the same amount of force.
“Don’t you see, Ginny? This has been the battle that has been going on inside of me for almost two years now!”
“Harry, we could still be together!”
“How, Ginny? How the hell could we manage that?”
“If we were meant to be together, Harry, it will work."
“How can you be so sure we'll end up together in the end?"
Ginny gulped. “Because I believe in us. I believe that you'll come out on top and you'll protect me if I need it. I love you, Harry, and nothing is going to stop me from being with you, including a dark wizard."she replied.
Harry walked toward her and moved his hands up and down her arms.
“I'm not asking you to risk your life for me. Why are you insisting on doing it?" Harry asked, inches from her face.
Ginny’s eyes were welling up. “Because I can’t live without you.”
Harry put his face right in front of hers, and before closing the distance. He said, “And you won’t have to.”
Standing in the Rain by MarauderWannabe
Chapter Notes: Finally up! *Dances* Me and my beta(Laila) have worked hard so I hope you enjoy!
Summary: Realizations and decisions are made.