I've got a hunger
Twisting my stomach into knots
That my tongue was tied off,
My brain's repeating
“If you've got an impulse let it out"
But they never make it past my mouth.
-Death Cab For Cutie, The Sound of Settling
Harry pushed his face further into the pillow with a sleepy frown. He could hear muffled shouting again and he wondered what on earth could send Ron and Hermione at it again. He took a deep breath and was pleasantly surprised to discover that he could, for the most part, breathe through his nose again. He let out a small sigh and was going to force himself back into his nice, serene sleep when it slowly dawned to him that he couldn’t move his legs. Or his left arm. Or right hand. Hmm, this was really quite odd because when he slept he usually could do such things.
Little by little he opened one of his emerald eyes, clouded with sleep. Well, that couldn’t be right, he thought. He must still be dreaming… And he would have very well closed his eye and drifted back to sleep if it hadn’t been for terribly realistic scent of flowers that surrounded him.
Harry’s frown deepened. This really was an odd dream, considering that it felt so authentic. When he had opened his eyes, he had seen a sleeping Ginny before him and he could have sworn that he felt someone tugging at the blanket. However, that was impossible. Why would he and Ginny be in the same bed? And…why would he be dreaming about that?
Then the memory of last night flooded his mind.
For the third time within three days, Harry jolted out of bed. Well, he tried to. Only…it was rather difficult when he was practically attached to Ginny. Their legs had tangled together; her red head was pressed comfortably against his chest; his left arm was underneath her waist and was tingling probably from lack of blood circulation. Not to mention their still entwined hands.
Her eyelashes fluttered and her eyes half opened, revealing her brown eyes. A drowsy and carefree smile graced her face before she closed her eyes. Then they snapped open, wide with confusion and shock.
“Harry?”
This was a very bad time to go red.
“Hi,” he smiled nervously.
“Why are you…we didn’t “” Her voice was filled with alarm as her eyes quickly checked to make sure they were both fully dressed.
“No!” he assured her quickly. The he flushed nervously as he recalled blacking out. “At least I don’t think so. I would never…! We were terribly sick.”
Ginny rose, pressing her free hand against her nightgown, making sure it was positively on. His left arm felt the blood flood through it, but it felt rather empty and a bit cold from the absence of her weight. He carefully untangled their legs and rose as well. There was a slight awkward silence in the air.
Harry was suddenly overwhelmed with horrible and ugly guilt. The Weasleys had always cared and loved him and this was how he repaid them? By practically taking advantage of their precious and only daughter or sister? His cheeks stained a shameful red. He could feel their enmity just from that thought.
And what about Ginny? Surely she never wanted to talk to him again… His heart clenched painfully. They had just started really to become friends too…
Anxiously, he glanced at her. At the exact same moment, she glanced at him too. It must have been his imagination, for he could have sworn that electricity rushed through his blood. Then her eyes flickered downward and his followed her gaze.
They were still holding hands.
He quickly released her left hand and rubbed the back of his neck as she held her hand in the other close to her chest.
“Sorry,” he blurted out. “You probably want to know why I’m…erm, in this bed.”
“Yes,” she said numbly, watching him.
“You see, in the middle of the night I woke up and saw you in Ron’s bed shivering because, um, your blanket fell off. So I got up and put it over you, but you were still shaking so I…took your hand,” he said lamely. Now it all seemed so stupid and strange to him. Why had he done that? “And you know, my head was still spinning from my own fever so I made my way toward my bed, but we were still holding hands so you… I kind of collapsed onto this bed.”
“Oh,” Ginny said at last. He risked a glance at her, hoping this wasn’t going to turn extremely awkward for the rest of the summer. To his great surprise, she began to grin. “Well, at least now I can honestly say that I’ve slept with Harry Potter.”
He stared at her for a moment, a bit dumbstruck before a sound escaped from his mouth. “Pfft…”
Before he knew it, he was laughing uncontrollably. It was partially because of her statement, but also because of the great sense of relief he felt. It was as if ten tons had been lifted from his chest.
“ACHOO!” the two of them sneezed simultaneously.
“I guess we’re still a little bit sick,” Ginny sniffed, pulling her blanket closer to her body. He found it fascinating how the cloth pooled around her legs in red ripples.
“Do you want to sleep some more?”
She shook her head. “I’m not sleepy anymore. Are you?”
He shook his head as well.
“What should we do now?” she asked.
The sudden loud growl that emitted from Harry’s stomach seemed to answer the question. “Err…”
“Shall we eat then?” she gave him a smile that soothed away his embarrassment.
“Please.” Harry smiled sheepishly.
Together they trudged down the winding stairs, their blankets still wrapped around their bodies. They could hear the bustling from the kitchen. Ginny threw him an amused look before pushing the door open to reveal a redhead and a brunette. The two of them jumped at the sight of Harry and Ginny and both of them were flushed a deep, guilty hue.
“Hello! I didn’t know you two were up!” squeaked Hermione in a pitch an octave higher than usual. “We…we didn’t disturb you, did we?”
Ron shot her an embarrassed glare.
“Er, no,” Harry mumbled, glancing from Ron to Hermione. The two of them couldn’t have…it wasn’t possible…
“No, actually,” Ginny answered smoothly with a smile, completely ignoring their abnormal behavior. Harry, however, noticed the glint of glee in her brown eyes. “We woke up and were hungry.”
“Oh good,” Hermione scrambled out of her seat to the counter. “Mrs. And Mr. Weasley went to stay with the twins to see what their new life is like, but she kept food for you two in case you got hungry! Warm porridge.”
“So you two have been here…alone,” Harry said slowly, trying to register this information.
Ron wasn’t facing Harry or Ginny, but his ears were extremely red.
“Thank you,” Ginny ignored Harry’s previous comment as she and Harry each took a bowl of porridge and he took the plate full of toast in his other hand. Harry made his way to sit at the kitchen table, but Ginny’s body intercepted him. “We’ll just…eat this in the living room.”
“Oh, okay,” said Hermione, but Harry caught the look of relief and gratitude she flashed toward the younger redhead. He blinked. He could have sworn that Ginny winked back.
“Let’s go, Harry,” Ginny said, leading Harry away toward the door. The moment the door closed behind them, she began giggling.
“What just…?” he asked in confusion.
“Oh, those two are finally going somewhere,” she beamed at him as she settled on the couch and Harry took the seat next to her. She balanced the bowl of porridge on her lap perfectly as she continued to speak while he placed the plate of toast onto the small table in front of them. “Couldn’t you tell? It was written all over their faces. We had to leave though, or else all the progress would have been lost. You know Ron.”
“Yeah but…” Harry struggled to find the right words. “I just can’t…I mean, just yesterday they were ready to tear each other’s heads off! And now…well, I mean it’s taken them long enough.”
“You’re not…” she hesitated, about to put a spoonful of porridge into her mouth. Then she smiled at him. “I’ll be around.”
He stared at her, stunned, as she continued to eat. Then he quickly looked away as the heat slowly crawled up his neck. How did she…? She couldn’t possibly have known from his jumble of words that he was a little worried about his friendship with Ron and Hermione once the two of them became more than just friends. His green eyes trailed back to Ginny. Was he that easy to read?
Harry didn’t exactly have a lot of experience with girls, except for perhaps Hermione and Cho. Hermione, however, wasn’t really…a girl to him. He knew, of course, that she was a female (a fact that seemed to have escaped Ron for several years), but she wasn’t someone who stirred weird and strange hot feelings inside him. Cho…she had done that. Yet by the end of last year, those emotions simply decayed. The thought of the raven-haired beauty no longer made him break out in sweat or nerves. Instead, there was a small emptiness and a lingering sense of dread.
But Ginny…Ginny was different. He liked to touch her hair…something he would never do to Hermione, Cho, or any other girl for that matter. She wasn’t exactly another Hermione, for the two of them weren’t that similar. One loved the world of books and authority, while the other would much rather go out into the world, experience those events, and defy authority. They were nice in different ways, but the feelings Harry felt for Hermione weren’t like those he felt for Ginny. However, he didn’t feel hot or clammy with her like he had with Cho either. In fact, he was drawn to her world. She gave him a sense of comfort that neither of the other two girls ever had…
“You better eat before it gets cold,” Ginny grinned at him, handing him a slice of toast. He looked at her, a bit startled from being pulled from his reverie. He smiled a bit uneasily as he took the toast. Hopefully she couldn’t read his mind. As they fell into a relaxed mood as they ate, Ginny spoke up again. “So any ideas on who will be captain of the Quidditch team this year?”
Harry winced. “I sure hope they lifted that life-time ban on me…”
“Don’t worry,” she said sympathetically. “I’m sure that they did. After all, that bat Umbridge is out of Hogwarts, you’ll be on a broom faster than you can say ‘Snitch.’”
“I sure hope so,” he smiled.
“So you’ll be Seeker, huh?” she mused to herself, taking a bite into her toast. She had dipped it into her white porridge. He looked at her with interest before trying it himself. It tasted…rather good.
“Oh…you weren’t planning on trying out for Seeker were you?” He looked at her worriedly. She had, after all, taken his place as Seeker during his ban. And she was good at it, from what he heard. He didn’t want any competition to ruin…whatever they had.
“Oh no,” she laughed cheerfully, waving off his concern. “Being a Seeker is fun and all, but you’re probably better than I am. Besides, I prefer being a Chaser. I may be small, but I’m fast and I’m accurate. The Seeker is always detached and looking for the Snitch, but I want to be in the middle of the action.”
“Actually, your build really does suit a Chaser or a Seeker,” Harry commented.
“So you’ve been checking out my build?” she asked slyly. He nearly choked on his food.
“N-No! That’s not what I meant,” he sputtered, his face turning red. But it was true “ Ginny’s petite body was lean and flexible and she also had the skill and speed that matched her build, thus making her one of the best Quidditch players on the Gryffindor team.
“Right, well,” she said as she set aside her now empty bowl and plate. She stretched out her body like a cat; her back arched and her arms rose high above her scarlet hair. He found himself smiling as he too set aside his empty bowl and plate. She smiled lazily and rubbed her stomach. “That was good…!”
He wasn’t sure what made him more satisfied. The meal or discovering how comfortable the redhead had become in his presence to act in this way. Then again, it still rather surprised him how relaxed he had become in her presence as well.
“Hopefully it’ll be sunny tomorrow,” she murmured absently, her hand still on her flat tummy.
“Oh hey, it’s raining,” Harry pointed out, gesturing to the window. Indeed, water was sliding down the pane. The night had fallen and they couldn’t see anything beyond the falling water. He always did like the rain… But watching it, he couldn’t resist yawning widely.
“Oh, are you tired?” Ginny asked, watching him closely.
“A bit,” he admitted abashedly.
“Then…” she said as she rose from her seat.
“Wait--!” He instantly reached out and grabbed the sleeve of her robe. Her eyes widened as they turned toward him. Realizing what he had done, he let go immediately and felt his face get red again. His sickness sure made his face feel hot. “That is…you don’t have to go.”
Her rosy lips slowly curved upward into a warm smile.
“I’m not going anywhere, Harry,” she assured him with a warm voice. She slid to the floor, folding her legs beneath her, as she patted the pillow she moved to where she had been sitting. “I didn’t think you’d feel comfortable with lying on my lap, so you can lay down here.”
“Er… Are you positive?” He wasn’t sure if he should argue though. His face felt so hot that he was probably burning up with a fever. Strange though…his mind wasn’t spinning like usual.
“Don’t worry about me,” Ginny grinned, putting him at ease. “I’ll just read aloud until you fall asleep. Is that okay with you?”
“Okay,” he consented meekly, gently laying his head on the soft pillow. He stared almost vacantly at her silky scarlet hair that glowed from the light reflected from the fire. He pulled his blanket closer to him and closed his green eyes. Soon her smooth voice flowed over him.
“Because you never yet have loved me, dear,
Think you never can nor ever will?”
It was strange…he could smell the familiar scent of flowers nearby…but he had been sure that there had been none in the room…
Hope the last blossom of life’s dying year.”
Hope…just what was hope to him? Perhaps it was the thought “ the illusion of living a life one might call normal. He wanted to do ordinary things. Have ordinary parents, ordinary friends, and one ordinary person that he…
Shall never Spring bring forth her daffodil,”
What was it about her voice? He couldn’t place his fingers on it… It lured him, drawing him deeper and deeper into a place he had never known…
Of roses with the nightingales they hear?”
The rain was the only sound that surrounded her words. The soft, gentle, and steady patter sounded so sad…yet so sweet.
If you had urged me with the tender plea”
That was it…her voice was like the rain. It washed away all the troubles and worries on his overburdened mind and soul…simply washed them all away.
(Eternal years, if Time should count too few,)”
If only…he could make time stop…and keep this moment like this…
Was possible, or probable, or true.”
Naru-chan: That poem was "Touching 'Never'" by Christina Rossetti by the way. Isn't it beautiful? Fits very well if you asked me... Did you understand it? Hopefully you did. Don't hesitate to ask if you didn't. I'm more than willing to show you.
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