*Disclaimer*- Messrs. Fuzzbutt and Fantail do not now, nor will they ever, claim to be J.K. Rowling. They own none of the characters or situations presented by Ms. Rowling in any of her brilliantly written books.

Chapter Twelve- Loss

The day after their Hogsmeade visit, Lily and James had patrol duties around the halls. Lily found herself laughing and smiling at nearly everything, her mood was so great. She'd had a wonderful day, and the previous day had been even better. She was even entertaining the idea that her feelings for James were growing into more than friendship, now. Life was good. Nothing could go wrong. Or so she thought. Fate has a twisted sense of humor.

Footsteps entered the sounds in the hallway; footsteps belonging to neither James nor Lily. Fully prepared to give out a detention, both were surprised when it wasn't a student who entered their view.

"Ah, Ms. Evans, if you could follow me, please, the Headmaster would like a word. Mr. Potter, come along as well, it is unsafe for you to be out in the corridors alone," Professor McGonagall said grimly. She looked at Lily and for a moment it seemed as though the Professor was going to cry. It was only a moment, however, as she turned and walked toward the headmaster's office. "Come now," she said briskly.

“Why is it unsafe?” James asked, confused. Since when was it unsafe to walk in the school?

“Voldemort, a new Dark Lord, is gaining power and followers. They are beginning to attack towns and villages. We cannot risk being in the hallways alone. He may choose the school to attack next."

“I thought this ‘Dark Lord’ was just some lunatic who doesn’t like muggle-borns,” James said. He had heard about this psychopath. Who hadn’t? But he hadn’t thought that there was anything to worry about.

“The lunatic part is what we’ve most to fear. We’ve been putting up new wards, just in case. Now hurry up, the Headmaster is waiting.”

The two Heads followed silently, each wondering what they were going to be told.

I hope everything is alright, Lily thought.

I hope everything's alright...

They reached a statue of a gargoyle. "Chocolate frogs," McGonagall said to the statue. It opened to reveal a slowly spinning staircase. "Ms. Evans," Professor McGonagall said, gesturing that she should follow. They headed up the stairs, James following.

At the top, Dumbledore's office greeted them. The aged Professor looked grim. "Ah, Minerva, Ms. Evans, Mr. Potter, come in," he said.

"Please, all of you, sit down." They sat. "Ms. Evans," he said gravely, "I'm afraid that I have to be the bearer of bad news."

Lily's heart pounded.

"Earlier today, there was an attack in Little Whinging-" he started.

"Are my parents alright? My sister? Oh no," she said, realizing something. "That's why you called me here, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid that your parents have been killed by Death Eaters, the followers of Voldemort."

"Petunia?" she asked.

"She wasn't home. At a friends house, she was, or so I'm told. We have people contacting her."

Lily nodded dumbly. She felt numb. Her parents, dead? No, that couldn’t be possible. But it was.

"I believe your rounds are over. Mr. Potter, if you could please escort Miss Evans to your common room. She needs not attend classes tomorrow."

James nodded. He looked at Lily, who was staring off into space, seemingly in shock. It appeared she hadn't heard professor Dumbledore.

"Lil," he said softly, tugging gently at her hand, "let's go." She nodded blankly and let him lead her down the spiral staircase toward Gryffindor tower.

They walked silently, and when they finally reached the portrait hole, (still holding hands, though James doubted that Lily noticed), it was James who muttered the password. He led her in toward the girls' staircase.

Lily was still silent. James was worried out of his mind for her. "Lily," he said tentatively, "will you be alright?"

Lily didn't look at him. It was a few moments before she replied, "Mum and Dad's anniversary is coming up." She was gazing at the ground. "It would’ve been the twenty-five year mark."

James didn't know what to say. He let her continue.

"They never reached it," she continued, backing toward the couch until she sat down, and putting her head in her hands. "And now they'll never reach it."

James sat down next to Lily and put a hand on her shoulder in support.

As if she had been waiting for that, she turned and buried her head in James’s shoulder, wrapping her arms around his neck. "They're gone," he heard her mutter. The realization hit her hard, then, and she started to sob violently, clutching the material of his shirt. “James, they’re gone.”

James pulled her into a hug and soon felt tears going through his shirt at his shoulder. He ran his hand down her hair in a soothing manner, and murmured words of comfort as she cried.

“Shh, Lil. It’ll be alright.”

“They’re gone. They’re never going to wait for me at the train station, they aren’t going to be there for me to show my NEWTs to, they won’t be there, James. They’re gone. They aren’t going to be there for my wedding, or my first job, or anything. They’re gone,” she sobbed.

“They aren’t gone, Lily. They’re still here, in your heart.”

“That’s the corniest thing I’ve ever heard,” Lily mumbled through tears.

“It’s meant to help,” he said, still stroking his hand through her hair.

“James, my mum and dad are… they’re dead,” Lily said. “They’re gone. What’ll Petunia say?”

“It doesn’t matter what she says,” James said to her, pulling her closer. “What’s important is that you still have each other.”

“She’ll wish I’d died instead,” Lily whispered, but James heard her, and anger filled his heart. Anger at Voldemort and his Death Eaters for doing this to Lily, anger at Petunia for not being the sister that Lily deserved, anger at the world for breaking his Lily’s heart. But he did not let her see his anger. It was not what she needed. Instead, he held her while she cried.

Eventually, her sobs subsided somewhat, and her grip on his shirt loosened until her hands simply rested near his shoulders. He still held onto her.

When she was calmed enough, James said gently, "Lily, you should get some sleep." He didn't want to leave her, but he didn't think she'd want to remain, and he couldn't go into the girls' dormitories.

She nodded but didn't move.

"Lil," he started, but she cut him off.

"I can't go up there."

"Why not?" James asked, perplexed.

"They'll ask questions. I don't want to answer questions," she said, and her eyes filled as her shoulders began to shake again.

He pulled her into a protective hug again. "Take my bed, then, I'll stay down-"

"No, they'll ask questions to," she said between sobs. “More, actually.”

"I don't want to leave you alone down here, though," James admitted. He wanted her safe in her dormitory.

"I don't want you to," she said, so quietly that he almost didn't hear her. "Please don't leave me. I don't want to tell anyone, but you already know. Please don't leave me.

James felt pulls at his heart as she said this. He wouldn’t leave her, not ever, if he could help it. “I’ll take the chair, you can have the couch,” James said.

Lily shook her head. “You’re taller. I’ll take the chair.” James opened his mouth to say he’d be fine with the chair, but Lily cut him off before he began. “Don’t argue,” she said.

He took the couch.

She curled up in the chair. She could not sleep, however.

James could no more sleep than she, so worried was he about Lily. He watched her as she curled up and stared off into space, wishing that this had not happened to her. She didn’t deserve it.

Lily finally came to a decision and stood up, wandering over to the couch James was on. James watched her. He could tell what she needed as she stood over him, and he scooted over to the inside of the couch. Lily laid down next to him, and he wrapped an arm around her as she put her head on his shoulder.

“G’night, Lily,” James whispered. She was already asleep.

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When James awoke the next morning, he was surprised to find a strange warm weight on his chest. Looking down, he saw red hair. The previous night's events came back to him and he felt his heart pull. This was all so unfair to Lily.

The next thing James noticed, upon looking up, was that he was surrounded by the smug faces of Sirius, Remus, Peter, Marlene, and Emmeline. This brought an irrational anger upon James. How could they stand there and smile those smiles like everything was okay?

James glared at the five with a glare that could only be described as deadly. "There's nothing to smile about here," he hissed, trying his best to keep his voice down so that Lily could continue to sleep.

"Oh, I don't know, Prongs," said Sirius, not catching James's anger.

“No, you don’t know! What do you think Lily has been through? And here you stand, smiling, like the world is okay, when her heart is broken! Just leave her be!”

"James, what happened?" Marlene asked. She was no longer grinning.

James did not answer right away. Looking at the sleeping form of Lily in his arms, he felt like it would be better not to. What if she woke up and heard? That would make it even more real to her.

"James, please tell us," Emmeline pleaded. "We're her best friends."

James took in a breath and looked at Lily. "They killed her parents," he said. "The followers of that Dark Lord, Voldemort. Killing curse, most likely. They're dead."

Emmeline put her hands over her mouth and Marlene turned to hug Remus. "How could they?" Emmeline wondered aloud, eyes wide. She started to reach out to Lily, wanting to hug the poor girl.

"Leave her be," James all but growled.

"James, she's my friend," Emmeline said, offended. "I have a right to comfort her."

"She won't need comforting if you let her sleep," he reasoned. After a moment he said, "Let her sleep. Let her be."

Sirius was unnaturally silent through the whole ordeal. He chose to speak now, however. "James, get upstairs and get ready, you'll be late for class."

"I'm not going," he said.

"You have to."

"Lily will need someone when she wakes up."

"James, you need to come to classes," Remus said.

"What for? What good would it do?" James glared at his friends.

Sensing defeat, Sirius and Remus left on their own. Marlene and Emmeline, more reluctant, stayed.

A few minutes later Marlene sniffled. "Emm, we have to go. Lily wouldn't want us to miss class. We'll check on her at lunch."

Emmeline nodded and the two made their way to the portrait hole. "James, you should go to class, you know," Marlene said as they started out.

James did not respond.

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Lily woke up feeling unnaturally heavy. She opened her eyes and saw James. Everything she'd learned last night- her parents' deaths, that they were attacked, that they were gone- came rushing back to her and she curled up against James and began to sob again.

James rubbed her back and whispered words of comfort, much as he had the previous night. Lily was calmed faster this time.

A while later, she finally croaked out, "What time is it?"

James looked at his watch. "Ten-thirty," he said.

Lily sat up. "James, why aren't you in classes?"

"I wanted to stay with you," he answered truthfully. "I need to be here for you."

Lily was touched, to say the least. She hugged him. "I'll be fine, go to classes," she said.

"But Lily, I don't want to leave y-"

"James, what'll people say if neither Head shows up to classes? Get to class. Go."

James sighed. "Lily, who cares what people say? We can say we needed a meeting-"

"Go to class, James," Lily said, pulling away from him.

James saw the look in her eyes and knew her mind was made up. He reluctantly got up, changed, and went to classes.

During every break between classes, James came down and visited Lily. He was late to each of his classes that morning.

At lunch he again came down, this time with Emmeline and Marlene, who each hugged Lily and looked at her with sad expressions. James sat nearby, simply watching. His being there was enough for Lily. He didn't have to say anything for her to know that he cared, and that he was there for her. For this, Lily was grateful.

James was late to all of his afternoon classes, as well. Lily half-heartedly scolded him, but she knew she would've had a harder time if not for him being there.

She'd somehow managed to pull herself together when he came, so that he would get to his classes on time. During classes, however, Lily found herself in tears most of the time. She felt so lost without her parents.

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James finally had his last class and came back to the common room, where Lily was still curled up on the couch. This was James's free time, as he didn't have a class as the rest of his friends did. Lily looked up at James and he weakly smiled and came to sit next to her.

She sat up and put her head on his shoulder. "Thanks James," she said.

"For what?"

"Being here. Telling my friends, so that I wouldn't have to. I really appreciate that."

"It's what friends do, Lil," James said, putting his arm around her shoulders as if to emphasize the point.

This earned a small smile from Lily and James felt a hundred times better for it. Lily needed to smile. That was what he'd decided he'd do- he'd help her through this. After all, how could he not.

Lily turned slightly and hugged James.

It was a long while before either of them got up. It was even longer before Lily convinced James that she'd be fine sleeping on her own that night in her dormitory.

But she wasn’t fine. She cried herself to sleep.

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Authors’ Notes: That was a really hard chapter to write. Please review, and tell us how we did.