Celebrating the Yuletide season
always lights up our lives.
Simple pleasures are made special, too
when they’re shared with you.
“Dad said they’re sent to Guernsey, the Ministry allotted them a house there, and Lucius and Draco were given some work with cattle.”
Ginny ended up choking on her cough-disguised giggle and Andromeda rubbed her back, smiling. Harry thought she was looking good today, as if a heavy veil’s worth of sorrow and care had been lifted from her face. It was the same subtle yet noticeable change he’d seen in… in Lupin, before, during his first days teaching them back in their third year.
“… sea air and the intimate neighbourhood will be good for them, especially for Cissy, I’m sure,” Andromeda was saying. Harry blinked, trying to tune in to the conversation. He’d been looking at little Teddy ” more particularly, at little Teddy’s hair, which was brown at that moment as he began to nod off.
Ginny, who was holding the baby in her lap, waved Teddy’s hand at him. He looked up and the two women smiled tentatively at him.
“More tea, Harry?” Andromeda asked.
Harry shook his head, smiling as warmly as he could. He still hadn’t gotten used to Andromeda being his friend, but she was, her resemblance to Bellatrix notwithstanding. And being Teddy’s godfather and Tonks’s and Remus’s friend was his tie to her. They’d bonded together as much as she and Molly did after… after everything.
“I’ll take him up,” Harry said. He rose from his armchair and gently but expertly plucked Teddy from Ginny’s arms. He could feel the two women watching him as he went up the stairs, his lips pressed against the baby’s forehead.
A Muggle CD player (No doubt Ted’s influence and no doubt magically enhanced) had been left playing in the nursery, ready for Teddy’s nap. Better than a silencing charm, music had the double purpose of filtering away noise and soothing Teddy back to sleep if he woke too early.
The song currently playing had a lovely, peaceful tune. Harry listened to it as he carefully placed Teddy in his cot. He smoothed back the baby’s chameleon-like hair, still brown then, and turned to leave. He always wanted to run away when Teddy wore his hair exactly that shade of brown, like Lupin’s.
...Sunbeams fall from up above,
chasing clouds away with love...
Harry paused at the door and looked back at the CD player. A framed photograph beside the component caught his eye. Perhaps Andromeda had just installed it; he hadn’t seen it before. The picture showed Tonks and Lupin. Maybe after their wedding. That was the only reason Harry could think of for Tonks wearing a white, lacy shirt and satiny navy trousers. She probably didn’t own a set of dress robes. Lupin, on the other hand, had on his least tattered robes and a rather dazed, even contrite expression, which dissolved into a rueful but brilliant grin when Tonks slugged an arm around his neck and kissed his cheek.
He didn’t know how long he just stood there and stared at his father’s last friend. Meanwhile, the lullaby had made a full circle with its verses.
...Sunbeams fall from up above,
chasing clouds away with love.
Sunbeams touch your heart and mine.
Someday, baby, you will shine...*
Harry smiled at Lupin and turned once more to the door, dropping a light kiss on Teddy’s propped little knee along the way.
He found Andromeda helping Ginny with her cloak in the foyer when he arrived downstairs.
“There you are then. Come on, we still have to collect George for the dinner. We’ll see you later, won’t we, Andromeda?” Ginny said.
“I’m glad you’re coming,” Harry added, kissing the older woman’s cheek. She nodded and placed a palm each on his and Ginny’s cheeks.
“Thank you for visiting. It means a lot to me and Teddy. We always like having you.”
Ginny protested that it was their pleasure while Harry looked at Andromeda pensively. Something had happened. She had always been rather detached before. Warm but detached, like Professor McGonagall, that was, never affectionate. But now, she seemed to be intent on imitating Mrs Weasley, for Harry had barely made it down the steps of the front porch when Andromeda pulled his arm back and squeezed and rubbed gently.
“Harry, I want you to know that I don’t place any blame on you. Don’t ever think it, dear. If anything else, I blame myself. I sometimes think this is retribution for being a coward, of not fighting earlier. I hid, Harry, did you know that? Shortly after I eloped with Ted, we hid; my courage only stretched so far as to defy my family’s plans for me. But to fight them outright... I didn’t care that other people were dying later, at my own sister’s hands even. As long as I had Ted, I didn’t care about other people. And then we had Dora, and she grew up to be so fierce about caring for other people’s security and safety! It’s almost funny, really.”
But she apparently didn’t think so, because she gave one sob, which she quickly swallowed down, wiping her eyes almost angrily with a hand at the same time. Ginny put an arm around her. Andromeda accepted the embrace and leaned back on the younger woman’s hold, but didn’t let go of Harry’s arm.
“But lately, just awhile ago, in fact, I realised it will do me no good to dwell on these things. I hope you would, too, Harry. Like I take comfort from Teddy and Molly, who lost a child like me, and who’s become my only real friend after Sirius and Ted,” she smiled tremulously at Ginny, “take comfort from Ginny and your friends, who will all assure you you’ve done no wrong.”
Harry digested all her words in, but only one thing stood out, really. She didn’t blame him in the least. He had always been ashamed when in her presence, her who lost her entire family to Voldemort. And yet she did not blame him. It was a relief.
He looked at Ginny. Her eyes were sparkling a bit more than usual.
Suddenly, he knew what he had to do. He pulled Andromeda’s arm and hugged her. She stiffened for a moment, surprised, and then she relaxed and shook with a couple of sobs before letting go.
“Oh dear, that was not dignified, was it?” she sniffed and winced, looking thoroughly annoyed with herself that Harry and Ginny grinned. She sighed and grinned back. So she really had some epiphany, Harry mused.
“I’m sorry I babbled,” Andromeda continued. “I just ” well, I just want you to be happy, dear. It’s Christmas and You-Know-Who is gone. You do deserve to be happy. You looked rather drawn earlier in my drawing room. Merlin knows you deserve to be drawn, too. Nevertheless, I’d choose happiness if I were you. Morgana, I did choose it. Ted over some other pureblooded egotistic ogre. But while my choice had been selfish and a little of a rebellion, yours will be different, yet another form of spirit.”
Harry was nodding, trying to reconcile this new Andromeda to the old one he still barely knew, who was now rolling her eyes. “I don’t know where all this sentimental ticking-off is coming from. I hope this mood has passed by the time I join you later. Now, scoot. It’s getting dark, hurry.”
“We’ll only Apparate to Diagon Alley,” Ginny said, even though she obediently dragged Harry down the porch and onto the fresh snow of the yard. It crunched beneath their boots.
Andromeda turned to go back inside the house. Did she wink?
“Well, we’re quite secluded up here. I remember how Dora used to enjoy the untouched snow all around all the time.”
“Nice idea!” Ginny said, grinning again, tugging his arm again. They walked to the wooden garden gate and opened it. The narrow street was deserted. Beyond was a broad field of white on all sides, counting Andromeda’s snow-covered yard. The dimness starting to descend as the afternoon progressed was just enough so that the brightness was not blinding.
“Harry, are you okay?”
He looked down at Ginny. Her concerned expression made his heart twinge. He took her hand and led her to the opposite field, across the road and over the stile. He propped her up on the highest rung and wrapped his arms around her waist, staring into her eyes.
“It would have been great if ” if we lost no one, wouldn’t it?”
She slapped his shoulder, hard.
“Don’t do that, Harry. Don’t.” And then she was crying against his neck.
“Sorry,” Harry mumbled, holding her tight and burying his nose in her hair. “But I really, really needed to get that out, Ginny. Think about it.”
She sniffled. “I won’t. Yes, it would have been a blast if we lost no one. Do you need to hear that, too? What for? We did lose people.”
He nodded. “Tell me next that we can’t have everything.”
She shook her head and lifted her face to glare at him. “Don’t say that.”
Harry was bewildered and shaken out of the buzz of his grief for a moment. “It’s true, isn’t it. We get Voldemort killed but we lost Lupin, Tonks, Mad-eye. Dobby. Hedwig.” His eyes stung. He didn’t dare mention Fred. He looked away from Ginny. For good measure, he walked off. If he felt guilty with Andromeda, it was nothing to how he felt when he was with Ginny, Ron or any of the Weasleys. During the funerals, he’d been sorrowful enough for all other feelings to be crowded out of his heart and mind. Now that things were beginning to settle ” Merlin, how he hated that thought. Things beginning to settle. His friends beginning to rot several feet under the ground.
It was so morbid he was thankful when something hit him squarely at the back of his head just then. Bits of the snowball seeped into his neck and nipped, pinching him back to reality, making him realise the fact that another snowball was zooming his way, straight at his face. The realisation came a little too late though.
CRUNCH!
He wondered if it was his forehead or nose that cracked. He plopped down on the snow on his rear end, his hand on his face. It hurt like the very devil. He supposed he deserved it for being gruesome. He wondered what Fred would say and do to him if Fred knew Harry was thinking about him rotting.
He sniggered before he could stop himself. His glasses slid down his nose.
“Oh, your glasses ” sorry. I packed and threw that too hard. I was angry. Reparo.”
His two lenses drew back together on the mended bridge. Ginny pushed them back up his nose. Harry pulled her down beside him.
“Why were you sniggering?” “Why were you angry?” they said simultaneously.
“I was thinking about Fred,” Harry answered.
“Oh.”
“So why were you angry?”
Ginny shifted and began to poke at the snow between her knees. “I’m sorry. I understand you. But please don’t say we can’t have everything. Because we can. I do.”
“How do you mean?” Harry was bewildered. She had lost a brother after all.
Ginny looked at him with the same half-exasperated, half-fond expression Hermione sometimes shot Ron. She only shook her head, lay down on the snow, and started waving her arms and legs.
“What are you doing?” Harry asked, bemused.
“A snow angel. In what planet did you grow up, Harry?”
“A planet called ‘cupboard under the stairs’.”
He’d meant it as a joke, but Ginny didn’t laugh, she lost her smile. Harry realised that, as with Mrs Weasley, his childhood mistreatment was not a laughing matter with Ginny. To shake off the sore subject, he lay down opposite from her and proceeded to make his own snow angel.
As he waved his arms and legs, he reflected on his childhood, thanks to his own quip. He wondered what had become of the Dursleys. So much had happened since they’d parted that asking about them had been pushed out of his mind.
More than that, as he lay there, with Ginny only a foot away from him, and his godson in the house only yards off, he saw this huge chasm between that Harry who used to be with the Dursleys, and the Harry he was now.
“Your angel is lopsided. Work more on this wing.”
Ginny’s head was upside down in his vision. Harry didn’t know what came over him; he just grabbed the scarf trailing down on his face, yanked it and braced Ginny’s fall with his hands on her shoulders. She yelped, but before she could say anything else, he kissed her.
She kissed him back, murmuring something against his lips. After a few moments, she shivered. Harry jumped up, taking her with him, and rubbed her red nose.
“We better Apparate now before we freeze here and splinch this nose behind.”
She nodded, hugging his waist. “Look at my perfect snow angel ” oh, you ruined the robe!”
Harry thought she was loads better than any perfect snow angel any day, not to mention warmer, but he didn’t voice it, only kissed her again and Apparated them both to The Leaky Cauldron, whose Apparition room had recently re-opened, its picture stamped nearly every day in the Daily Prophet's advertisements, inviting patrons once more.
The warmth of the Apparition room was like a slap on their cold faces. They stripped off their scarves and cloaks and went down the staircase to the pub below.
Tom’s brows rose to his bald crown in delight but he silently nodded them to a secluded corner, mouthing, “I’ll be with you in a sec.”
“It’s my first time here since ” It hasn’t change one bit, has it?”
“Some things never do, Harry,” said Ginny cryptically.
Tom arrived, diverting Harry’s question. Ginny ordered a mug of hot chocolate. Harry repeated her.
“And marshmallows, please, Tom,” Ginny added.
They sat there in silence, looking around. It was two days to Christmas and not many people were in the pub. There was one family dining in a table for four over by the window. Three young men and their mother, who caught Harry’s eye, held the gaze for a moment and then looked away. Aside from the family, solitary figures dotted the other tables, probably blokes who didn’t have families to be with for the holiday.
Tom came with their hot chocolate in a tray. The publican served them a plate of pretzels and a little pitcher of cream along with the mugs and marshmallows. Then he bowed away, patting Harry on the back.
The chocolate was thick and had frozen cream in the shape of a snow angel melting in its surface.
Ginny hesitated at dumping marshmallows into her mug. “Aww, look at the angel.” And she did look until the angel melted. Only then did she let the marshmallows drop from her fingers.
All this time, Harry had been watching her. When she emerged from behind her large mug with chocolate on her nose and upper lip, he lost his restraint and dragged his chair noisily beside her so he can kiss the chocolate off her face.
She blushed as red as her hair. “Harry!” she said to her lap. After several seconds, she looked up and grinned. “What was that for?”
I’m just so glad I have you. I realise now why you said we can have everything. “Oh, for the perfect snow angel.”
She looked into his eyes and seemed to read his unspoken words there. She kissed him demurely on the cheek. “Well, I’m glad you figured that out. Honestly, Harry. If ” if you’d died, I don’t think I’d have been happily making snow angels or even dunking marshmallows in hot chocolate.”
Harry nodded, wanting to hug her tightly but suddenly feeling reluctant for more public displays. “Let’s not talk about dying anymore. Let’s drink our chocolate.” He dipped a pretzel in his mug and offered it to her.
He had no sooner wrapped his hands around his mug and was preparing to take a healthy long gulp when he and Ginny both sensed they weren’t alone in their corner anymore.
The woman whose eye he caught earlier was standing behind them, wrapping her scarf around her neck and smiling at them.
“I’m sorry for intruding on you like this, Mr Potter. I just want to wish you a happy Yule, you and your friends. I’m Criselda Creswell, and those are my sons over there. We’re about to go home.”
The name rang bells in his mind and he shot to his feet and shook the woman’s hand with both of his, nodding wordlessly, his throat constricted.
Yet another family who had been torn by Voldemort.
He could remember Dirk Creswell’s voice, telling how he had narrowly avoided being locked up in Azkaban... He had done it all for nothing, he was still killed.
Harry looked around and the Creswell brothers raised their brown shopping bags to him as they moved to the door.
Yet another pang throbbed and then eased from Harry’s heart. Mrs Creswell squeezed his hand, smiled at Ginny, and left.
Later, as they trudged through the snow in Diagon Alley on the way to number ninety-three, with the taste of chocolate still in his mouth and Ginny holding his hand, he saluted Lupin in his mind. Chocolate did always help.
Author’s Note: *Someday Baby by Katherine Dines. A classic baby song. The reference to the Malfoys is explained in my other fic, The Art of Weaselling (Second Place winner in The Trial of Lucius Malfoy Challenge) where I had Lucius sentenced to exile among Muggles for three years. ^_^ Again, thank you for reading. Tell me what you think. By now, you see that each chapter is a one-shot, concentrating on one or two characters. Also, aren’t they smiling rather a lot? Sad people often do. Sad people who used to be happy and wants to be happy again.