“What do I have to do to get through to you?” Ginny yelled as she ran behind Harry and into the storm outside, “I’m sorry you lost your parents and I’m sorry for everything you’ve gone through, but don’t let that control your life!” Once within reach she grabbed Harry by the arm and stopped him from walking away. He tugged his arm away but remained stationary allowing Ginny to stand stubbornly in front of him, “Harry, stop living in the past and look what’s right in front of you…what happened, happened and there isn’t anything you can do about it! But you can make the right decisions now.”
Harry looked down into Ginny’s eyes which were gleaming with fire. Biting the inside of his lip hard allowed him to form his words, “You don’t know Ginny…you have no idea what it’s like!”
“What what’s like Harry? What?!” Ginny yelled, blinking the rain that was pouring down around them out of her eyes. She wanted desperately to understand…he didn’t think she could.
“To have no one understand!” Harry yelled back. They were both soaked down to the skin even though they had been outside for barely a minute. Neither of them seemed to notice that the storm was raging dangerously all around them.
The wind was whipping Ginny’s red hair across her face, she tucked it behind her ear for what seemed like the millionth time as she shouted to Harry, determined to make her voice louder than the thunder clapping above them, “I’m trying to understand Harry, but you won’t let anyone near enough…how do you expect me to understand if you keep pushing me away!?”
She took a careful step forward, but it was offset by Harry stepping back and shaking his head, “That’s just it! Everybody that’s ever been close to me…they’ve, they’ve…people’s lives are ruined because of me! If you get too close you are going to get hurt!” His hair was matted down against his forehead, hiding his scar from view. He noticed that Ginny was shivering from being out in the cold rain. He wanted nothing more than to pull her close and rub her shoulders.
Ginny shook her head violently as her hair clung to her face, “No, no, my life was ruined when you left me Harry…not when I met you! I’m hurt right now because I’m not close to you…why can’t you understand that!?” Ginny said angrily pointing to the ground emphasizing her words.
“I do…I do Ginny! I know because I feel the same way…but, but I…I can’t!” The rain hitting their faces hid the tears that were sliding down both of their faces, but their voices could not be disguised.
Ginny’s voice was strained from shouting, yet she continued to yell as another clap of thunder boomed above, “You can’t what Harry? Be happy?” She stared at him as the rain emphasized the features of his face.
“I can’t lose another person I love!” The sky was suddenly white with light as a bolt of lightening spread across the sky. It seemed that for a moment the storm had decided to stop its raging, for a second there was no sound, although the rain poured harder than ever.
A low rumble echoed throughout the hills and after Ginny let Harry’s confession of love flow through her body she spoke the only words she could think of, “and by pushing me away you aren’t losing me?”
Harry shook his head. He knew everyone was right, he wasn’t protecting Ginny from Death Eaters by pretending not to love her, he was protecting her from the horrors and the trials he knew his life held, “No, my life…it’s too hard, it’s too much for anyone to have to…I can’t ask you to…” Harry stuttered, his voice cracking with pain.
Ginny’s voice became gentle without losing any of its power, “You don’t have to ask me Harry, I want to be in this with you…if you’d just let me. Harry tell me what you’ve been through…tell me what has made you, you…tell me what you have to deal with in the future, tell me when you’re scared, tell me when you’re happy, tell me whatever you want whenever you need…Harry, I want to be here with you!” and then she added, “ I love you back…”
They stood there in the rain staring at each other. They were both breathing heavy, neither flinched with the ominous clouds breaking above them. Ginny’s eyes never left Harry’s; they shifted from side to side searching for the love she knew was within him.
In those few seconds of Ginny’s eyes, filled with love and concern, looking deep within his, Harry felt like everything could be okay. He was still scared out of his mind, scared that he’d hurt her, or lose her, but he knew that she was the only one that could bring him through the war. In one motion Harry stepped forward sliding one arm around her waist, his other hand curved around her neck, bringing her lips to his.
Ginny saw the change in his eyes; she saw his eyes linger over her lips before he moved towards her. She didn’t miss a beat; her arms flew around his shoulders as his arms pulled her into him. The rain fell between their faces and ran down stopping on their connected lips.
Harry pulled away, resting his forehead against hers, “I’m scared…” he whispered.
“It’s okay to be scared…and, I know you don’t want to hear it, but there is a lot I still need to tell you. But, I’m here with you and that’s not going to change,” Ginny whispered back, her hands resting on both his cheeks. He nodded as Ginny pulled him into a hug. He buried his face into her neck and she ran her fingers through his wet matt of hair.
Ginny felt Harry’s shoulders shaking. He took a deep rattling breath, “I love you Ginny,” he whispered into her shoulder. Ginny smiled and closed her eyes, pulling Harry closer to her body.
“I love you too Harry,” she answered him, tightening her grip around his shoulders. She felt Harry’s arm tighten around her waist.
“I can’t lose you…I can’t,” Harry’s voice was filled with fear and desperation. It scared Ginny a little to see him so vulnerable for the first time, but she knew she had to be strong for him.
“You won’t…we will always be together, Harry. No one will change that, I promise,” she said with a strong voice. Harry nodded into her shoulder. They continued to hold each other and not until the storm began to weaken did they notice how long they had actually been outside in the rain.
Ginny began to shake more fiercely and her teeth began to chatter. Harry tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, kissed her forehead and took her hand within his, leading her back inside. Once in the living room, they sat at the couch and Ginny set the logs ablaze in the fireplace.
“I’m sorry I never asked you about what happened to you with the Chamber,” Harry said before anything else could be said.
Ginny smiled and shook her head, “You had enough to be getting on with,” Harry was going to say that was no excuse but Ginny held up a hand, “Listen, Harry. Can we just say there’s been many times when both of us have chosen to keep things from the other when perhaps we should have done the exact opposite? But we’re here now, and so I’m going to tell you everything…mostly because you’re ready to hear it now.” She added with a sly smile.
Harry laughed despite himself, “Yeah, I guess I am.” And it was true, having Ginny back in his life made him feel lighter, he didn’t notice it at the time, but whatever energy had been drained the past 24 hours was back in full force.
"It's hard to decide where to start,” Ginny began. “I guess it all starts with the Chamber. Immediately after that whole ordeal, I struggled with dealing with what had happened. It was hard to understand everything that happened to me when I really didn't remember that much...besides waking up and you being there. I had to deal with knowing I was possessed by Tom, but not remembering it. I would have dreams that I knew were nightmares, because I would wake up suddenly with my heart racing and recall for only moments small visions of you bleeding or Fawkes carrying us out." Harry listened silently as she explained...knowing this information was crucial to eventually understanding everything else.
She took a deep breath. "Dumbledore had known I would struggle, much like post traumatic stress will do. One night, in the middle of the summer, I had received an owl from him. He was simply enquiring how I was doing, if I was still having nightmares, and if I had any questions. It was so nice and I'm almost positive it wasn't him trying to pry information out; I think he was pleasantly surprised at discovering I could help him. I had replied, telling him I still had nightmares, but that I was getting used to them...as they were mostly the same. I mentioned briefly, mostly as a joke, that I had started writing in a normal diary...and that it was kind of nice not having someone talking back, especially since Tom could be pushy about certain topics of conversation. Of course this intrigued Dumbledore. So much so that he came to visit the Burrow, under the pretense to my parents he was checking up on me, but he pulled me aside and explained his interest."
"He wanted to know if you remembered what you and Tom talked about." Harry stated and she nodded.
"Indeed. I remembered quite a lot about what I wrote, and a few things he had written
back to me. Dumbledore told me if I ever remembered anything about what either of us had written in that diary, that I was to write it down and send it to him...no matter how
silly...and the same I should do if I had dreams any different than what he had already
heard.
"Well, long story shorter, I slowly began to remember more and more of our conversations, and I dreamt more and more about the Chamber...I started having regular meetings with Dumbledore as his questions became more specific and my dreams became more and more upsetting…even dreams not about the Chamber, like about war breaking out. Dumbledore and I didn’t discover I had the ability of prophetic dreams until I started having dreams about Sirius and him finding you. At the present time I was dreaming the exact opposite of what everyone thought. That Sirius didn’t want to hurt you. Then it turned out that was true.
“Knowing that there was a possibility my dreams were prophetic drove me crazy. Dumbledore gave me a sleeping draught for awhile during my third year, when you were in the tournament.”
“The memory I saw Dumbledore told you no,” Harry interjected.
“He did say no, at first. At that point, if it is the memory I think it is, I had had a
few prophetic dreams and the fact that Dumbledore didn’t know what was going on with you in the tournament, made him want to keep the possibility of getting clues through a
prophetic dream in tact. He soon saw, after a few more meetings, that I couldn’t take
it, having dreams about graveyards and Death Eaters,” Ginny said pointedly, letting Harry know that she had seen glimpses of the graveyard before it happened.
He took the bait, “Did you dream about…before it happened?” He waited in suspense
as she paused.
“Yes and no. I dreamt about it in pieces, on different nights, in different contexts.
Knowing the story now, what you went through, I can piece together my dreams prior to it happening and know that I could have predicted it. It’s frustrating to know I could have stopped it.” She looked away sadly.
Harry tried to comfort her, “There’s no way you could have…”
She stopped him as if she knew what he was saying, “I had dreams about Portkeys, about
blood sacrifices, about Voldemort returning...about champions dieing..."
"Did Dumbledore know about these dreams?" Harry asked simply, like trying to console an upset child.
"Yes, but he said we couldn't assume they were prophetic, since not all my dreams were..."
"So if he didn't even piece them together, how were you supposed to?" Harry asked, still
trying to be comforting.
“By not taking the sleeping draught like Dumbledore advised. If I had just toughened up…if I had just allowed myself to have the dreams, who knows what I could have prevented.”
“Listen, I was there. I dreamt about what happened after…of course you wanted a sleeping draught! That night was horrible!” Harry insisted.
“It was. I convinced Dumbledore to give me the draught the night after I had a dream about Voldemort torturing you until you died. It was so bad…my best friend couldn’t wake me up…I got sick when I finally woke up.” Harry’s heart felt empty, he couldn’t move and he bit the inside of his cheek hard to make the pain physical instead of emotional.
“Why didn’t I know about this…why did no one know?” Harry asked in indignation.
“I made my friend promise not to tell…the other girls had snuck out that night…thank goodness. I didn’t tell Hermione because she would have needed to know more, Ron would get all brotherly and you…well, you had enough to deal with. It was around the second task.”
“Okay, from now on, I never ‘have enough to deal with’,” he held up his fingers in quotes, Ginny nodded in understanding. “You still don’t have dreams like that…” Harry asked suddenly. “You still take a sleeping draught?”
Ginny looked at him in shock. “After Cedric? After what happened to you? Of course I don’t take a sleeping draught! If I get too tired from not having a good nights’ sleep I take other potions to help me through the day.”
“Gin!” Harry scolded, not able to take the fact she was suffering at night.
Ginny shrugged, "The point is this, knowing that I had that information in my head, without the ability to use it...even to this day it bothers me. After Cedric’s funeral I had a dream about a group of people, fighting against the Dark side in the war. Dumbledore then explained to me the Order of the Phoenix and how he was working to bring it together again. Then he got really busy. My dreams became less distressing. Most of my fourth year the dreams I spoke to Dumbledore about seemed so incredibly random to me, but he kept on insisting they were important. He said he couldn’t explain it to me yet…but then last year, like I said, he explained to both you and me the Horcruxes. He gave you more detail about Tom’s past. He spent more time with me helping me understand the dreams I had been having, and which ones were important and why…I learned how to sift through my dreams, how to know which were prophetic…I’ve gotten quite good at it.”
“What makes your dreams important…I mean…how…” he didn’t know quite how to ask, but Ginny seemed to understand his question.
She nodded, “They are important because of the prophecy. The prophecy was given a very long time ago. Before I was even born…unlike yours, given fairly recently. Your prophecy was lost at the Ministry…but mine was found, during the clean up, by a friend of my dad who works at the Ministry.” She cleared her throat before continuing, “‘Born seventh to the seventh son, the only girl in seven generations, she alone can hold the power The One controls. She alone can lead the way to the end of the war, for only she can See the seven souls opening the way for The One to succeed. She born seventh…’”
Ginny let it sink in. She had been thinking about the words for a full year, Harry was trying to find a spot in his full head to place it. There was no denying it now…Harry needed her to win. Somehow, he knew this all along…however he tried to fight it. “You can see why I need to join you if you want to win. I can’t help you find the Horcruxes unless I’m with you; at least it will speed up the process by quite a bit.”
Harry was deep in thought, his mind immediately started coming up with ideas on how Ginny could be kept safe, away from the brutal life of searching Ron, Hermione, and he endured. “Stop that.” She said, and he looked up, affronted. “I know what you’re thinking. The fact of the matter is this: the ring that Tom made into a Horcrux, the one that destroyed Dumbledore’s hand…I recognized it only after Dumbledore showed me that memory. That night…I had a dream about what I had seen in the Pensieve…and it was clear to me what the ring really was. Don’t you see? By coming on these hunts with you, I might See something that I can’t See sitting safe at home.”
Harry nodded understanding the emphasis of Seeing the Horcruxes, like the Prophecy had said. Ginny sighed deeply. She had been talking for a long time now and they were only scratching the surface. “So let me see if I’ve got everything straight so far,” Harry said dully. “Your first year, you had conversations with Tom, he possessed you, talked to you in the Chamber…your nightmares progressively got worse while revealing more and more relevant information. By your second year, you started to develop prophetic dreams, but neither you nor Dumbledore could figure out how to decipher and understand them. By your third year, the dreams became so intense and impossible to piece together, but it became obvious that they were indeed prophetic. You continued to relay information, your fourth year, to Dumbledore, who used it to try and gain intelligence on the Horcruxes. Then your prophecy was heard so Dumbledore decided, during your fifth year, to explain the Horcruxes and help you understand your prophetic dreams. It worked and you were able to identify the ring.”
“Yes. After the ring turned out to be the Horcrux it was quite clear of my eventual place in the war. Dumbledore also made it clear that it wasn’t time for you to know…even though we had just started dating. He told me that our relationship couldn’t, well, he said shouldn’t, be based on something as horrible as planning a war. His advice was for me to keep the information to myself until the right time. I asked him when that time would be, and he said after you had your chance figuring it out yourself.”
Harry scoffed, “Figuring it out myself?” It made him sound like he was destined to fail.
Ginny gave him a stern look, telling him to get the thoughts out of his head, and it worked. He felt bad for thinking it, and realized he did need help.
“Now, Dumbledore’s death. I knew that Snape had made an Unbreakable Vow, but I didn’t know with whom. I knew Draco was up to no good, but I didn’t know for what reason. I knew that Dumbledore was taking you on the search for the locket. It was me who suggested looking at the cave. I just didn’t put it all together until the Death Eaters were in Hogwarts. When I saw Draco and Snape running up the tower, just before it collapsed, I had a vision. My eyesight went completely white and I saw Dumbledore falling from the tower. Then I heard Draco say he had to finish his work, and Snape was on his heals. It was then I knew Draco was on a mission to kill Dumbledore and that Snape’s Unbreakable Vow was to assist him. It was agonizing knowing all that…without being able to get up to that tower.”
“Like Dumbledore immobilizing me so I couldn’t interfere.” Harry whispered. Ginny nodded silently. “So you’ve just been waiting for me to stumble on all this? This whole time you could have been with us…getting along with it?”
Ginny gave a weak smile, “I wish it was that easy. There was what Dumbledore told me, to wait to tell you. Then…well, I’ve been having a lot of dreams about me joining you three in battle. I can’t really tell if they are prophetic or not.” She looked away silently as if the answer would be written against the back wall.
Harry gave her a calculating look and wanted to know what she had been dreaming, but she quickly changed the topic before he had the chance. “Dumbledore left me a Pensive of my own.”
“What?” Harry said shocked. “They are so rare…”
“I haven’t used it much. It took me a while to even get used to the fact that I was putting a part of myself into something where I can’t see where it keeps its brains.” She smiled coyly and Harry joined her. “Dumbledore insisted in a letter he left it would be safe…at any rate, I’ve put memories and dreams into it, but I’ve never gone back to review them. So, we’ll have our hands full between Dumbledore’s and mine. In a lot of my dreams, we have this conversation, and then…depending on what decisions are made…it’s different every time and I don’t know which dreams are prophetic, and which are just my own worries and hopes.”
Harry could hear the anxiety in her voice. He held out his hand and tucked it around her neck. “We’ll figure it out.” Ginny nodded.
“Together,” she said firmly. Harry nodded back.
“Together,” and he leaned forward and placed his lips on hers.