Chapter 18 - First Day
"WOULD. YOUTWO. STOPPIT!!"
"Me?" James retorted, honestly puzzled. "ME??!! I think it should be fairly obvious that the problem here is--"
"The problem here," Lily spat, "is both of you, going on at each other like, like-- like I don't know what. Sev--" and here she turned on Snape, which was satisfying. The ‘Sev’ bit, not satisfying at all-- it emphasized their familiarity, the long years of their friendship, and, possibly even worse, it made that bloody awful name of Snape's sound almost normal. ‘Severus’ was ripe for mockery. ‘Sev,’ on the other hand, sounded halfway human. Snape glowered from under his greasy curtain of hair at no one in particular -- at the world in general, probably, this being Snape. How the hell did he have greasy hair on the first day of school? It was almost like he worked on it.
"Sev, he's Head Boy. No one knows why. Accept it and stop being such an arse to him about how he got the position. As for you, James--" But unexpectedly, even as she rounded on James, she grabbed Snape’s arm and roughly shoved up the left sleeve of his robe. Snape flinched, and for a second James almost expected to see something there -- the Dark Mark, not just a pale, skinny arm, which was, unfortunately, all there was to see.
Lily pulled the sleeve back down, let go of Snape’s arm, and announced, "He's not a Death Eater, James. Bloody well stop that nonsense and start behaving like a Head Boy should to a prefect. Both of you, act your age, which is seventeen, not three." She stopped, took a breath, and composed herself. "Thank you. Now, let's have no more of this nonsense for the rest of our journey to Hogwarts. Or this term. Or ever."
She turned back to her old friend and ordered, –You, go help round up the new Slytherin first years. We’ll be arriving soon.â€
–But I--â€
–If they’re small, and wearing Slytherin colors, and you have never seen them before in your life, then they’re your responsibility. Go.â€
Snape slouched away, slowly, reluctantly, turning back to look at the two of them as the door slid closed. James, left alone in the Hogwarts Express prefects’ compartment with the one and only Lily Evans, didn’t even try to stop the triumphant sneer that made its way across his face. Snape’s features darkened, but Lily must have looked as though she meant business, because the greasy git didn’t stop, leaving James alone with his quarry. Unfortunately, Lily didn’t seem interested at this point -- as if she ever had in their six years at Hogwarts.
–You are Head Boy,†she informed him, quietly but still angrily. –Do you have any idea what that means?â€
–I’m not an idiot, Evans,†he bristled, but then cheered up as he thought of the logical rejoinder. –But I am new on the job. I suppose I’ll have to take lessons from you.â€
Lily blushed prettily, straightened her shoulders and continued. –It means you’re supposed to be an example for the other students and the leader of the prefects. I have to agree with Severus that I have no idea how you were given the position, although obviously I don’t agree with his… insinuations.â€
–Thanks for the vote of confidence,†James responded sarcastically. –As for how I became Head Boy-- I was captain of the Gryffindor Quidditch team. For two years. How different can it be?â€
It had not occurred to James to question his fitness for the role of Head Boy, so during this journey, it had come to him as something of a shock that apparently there were quite a few others who were openly baffled at his appointment. He reached back, elbow pointing at the ceiling, and ruffled his own hair, which he was certain made him look cooler than he felt at that particular moment. This is not how he had envisioned his final autumn train ride back to Hogwarts, or his inaugural moments as Head Boy -- marked by a squabble with Snape and a dressing-down from Lily Evans, who had been his favorite reason for taking the job in the first place.
–How different can it be?†Lily exclaimed. –James, your team is a captive audience. They all share the same goal as you, which is, I take it, winning. If they give you enough trouble, McGonagall presumably boots them off the team for you. The prefects are nothing like that -- they serve at the request of their Head of House and Professor Dumbledore, not you or me. If they’re difficult, you can’t toss them off the team. And as for the rest of the student body, you’re stuck with them. That’s how different it can be. You need to work to have them on your side. If they don’t respect you, they won’t bother doing what you say.â€
–Oh,†James replied, dully. –Well, when you put it like that.â€
–Furthermore,†Lily continued, in her charmingly bossy manner, –there are three seventh year male prefects out there who’ve been doing this for two years already and who all wonder why you got the job instead of them -- and yes, I’m including Remus. You may have nothing to prove on the Quidditch pitch, but you do here. I’d recommend you stop acting like such an arse and start acting like Head Boy.â€
–What did I do to deserve all this?†James protested. –All you said to him was--â€
–It’s none of your business what I said to him. Besides, I’ll talk to him later. Now get out there and do your job.â€
And she pushed past him, leaving James standing in the prefects’ compartment, angry and humiliated-- and jealous. Jealous that Snape got away with a brief scolding while he received an unnerving lecture. Jealous that Lily would talk to Snape later-- presumably about Snape’s behavior, but also about matters other than prefect business, since Snape and Lily always seemed to have something to talk about. Jealous, even, of her casual physical comfort with the slimy git -- the arm linked in his, the hand on his shoulder to get his attention, even the fact that she was so familiar with him that she could grab his arm and push up his sleeve as though she did it all the time. Angrily, James pushed open the door of the compartment and stepped out into the hallway of the train, then wondered what the hell to do next. James Potter, Head Boy -- who had absolutely no idea what he was doing.
……………………..
–They should have asked Geeta.â€
–Geeta?â€
–What? She’d be better than Mary, at least.â€
–Watch it,†Remus interjected.
James had survived his first day as Head Boy and was, mercifully, back in his own room with his own roommates, where he could finally relax after a day of following Lily and trying to imitate her as surreptitiously as possible. At least here, no one questioned his fitness for the position to which he had rather surprisingly ascended. He tried not to think too much about what Lily had said about Remus. Surely Remus understood why he couldn’t have the job himself.
–Come on, Remus,†Sirius continued. –I know she’s your friend, but Mary has… The Famous Mary Temper.â€
–Which she exhibits only rarely, and usually to the deserving few,†Remus said evenly. –Geeta, on the other hand, never gets angry, but seems to think she has the right to say whatever she wants to whomever she wants whenever she wants. We need a prefect, not a queen.â€
–Doesn’t seem that way to me,†Peter disagreed. –I think Geeta would have been much better.†Peter, notably, had been on the receiving end of The Famous Mary Temper on more than one occasion, and Peter seemed to take such affronts to heart more than his compatriots did.
–Hester -- too quiet,†Remus went on, ignoring Peter and ticking off the list of the seventh-year Gryffindor girls on his fingers. –Marlene -- not even remotely interested. And Lily, who is already Head Girl.â€
–Which leaves Mary.â€
–Which leaves Mary,†Remus concluded. –Should make it interesting for you, James. Mary and Snape get on like a house on fire, and now they’re your new prefects.â€
–Why doesn’t he just ask her out and leave Lily for you?†Sirius asked. –He should have given up by now. Lily deserves better.â€
–Even Mary deserves better. Snivelly and Mary -- bit of a revolting thought, really,†Peter mused, as Sirius grinned and began a bout of fairly realistic imitation retching.
–Why do you think Dumbledore made me Head Boy?†James asked, suddenly changing the topic and airing his newfound neurosis at the same time. Worrying about things was not a customary practice of his, and he was not enjoying it at all. In fact, he wanted his worries laid to rest as quickly as possible. Sirius and Peter looked at Remus, who seemed to be at a loss for words, and James found himself wishing he hadn’t asked.
–Presumably they thought you had the necessary leadership skills,†Remus finally offered, diplomatically. –Edric is not particularly bright, Roland is probably too quiet, and Nott was completely useless and has been replaced by Snape, who’s nothing more than the best of a bad lot, and too new besides. And I’m a werewolf.†Remus rarely referred to his lycanthropy himself, especially with such bluntness, so this was a bit of a departure, one to which James decided not to give too much thought. There was a hint of self-loathing in Remus’s inflection, something that had become mercifully uncommon these days. James himself had benefitted at Remus’s expense, somehow, and he hadn’t even asked for it. He couldn’t win.
–I’m new myself,†James answered. There was an awkward pause. –Are you angry?â€
–At you? For being Head Boy?â€
–Yes. You know you were the best candidate. And you know why… why you weren’t chosen.â€
The pause was lengthy this time. Finally Remus spoke. –I know why. And I understand -- Dumbledore pulled me aside at the end of last year. Disappointed, yes. Angry, no. I suppose I’ll have to get used to this sort of thing. Besides, you’ll do a good job.â€
–Do you honestly think so? I don’t think Evans does.â€
It had all been so much easier the year before, after he had inadvertently gotten Snape out of the way. Not inadvertently, really-- he had been trying for years to make Snivellus look bad in front of Lily. Surely she could only come to Snape’s defense so many times before seeing him for what he was. James had intended only to humiliate and emasculate the creepy git -- had had no idea that Snape would, in his rage and frustration, take it so much further.
–I don’t need help from a filthy little Mudblood like her!â€
Excellent.
At first James had thought it was just the latest, and probably worst, in a long line of fights for those two, since they seemed to bicker like an old married couple, fighting and making up over and over and over again. But apparently this time it had been different. Lily had appeared to no longer be speaking to Snape -- understandably so, given what he had said to her. They had left for the summer, and when they all returned, James had been certain that the gruesome twosome would be back to normal after a summer sequestered away in the dying mill town they called home -- Lily arriving on the platform chatting and laughing with Snape, reluctantly taking her leave of him to go to the prefects’ compartment as if parting from him were something she regretted. They had their problems during the school year, but summer always seemed to rekindle their friendship.
The previous summer, though, apparently had not. Sixth year had started, and Lily still had nothing to do with Snape. Snape, however, seemed to have jettisoned his would-be Death Eater roommates, and therein lay the problem. James and Sirius could continue to attack him; it was certainly very satisfying to do so. However, Snape had become a solitary figure, and attacking him made the Marauders look like a quartet of bullies. After a few incidents early in the school year, James had tacitly backed off. He had worked with Lily in Potions, and seemed to be making some progress, when all of a sudden, she seemed to be speaking to Snape again. James had no idea what Lily had been doing out by the lake that cold spring morning, or how Snape had known to go looking for her, but somehow Snivellus had rescued her from Avery and Mulciber, and unfortunately, the incident seemed to have erased past wrongs. One step forward, two steps back.
That summer, James and Sirius had escaped from the house, where James’s mother was virtually holding them captive for fear of the goings-on in the wider world, and had spent the day at Diagon Alley. Actually, they had spent the morning in London, chatting up Muggle girls, who all seemed to have an inexplicable fascination with Sirius, but eventually James had gotten bored of it and dragged Sirius to the entry portal at the Leaky Cauldron. They were still in Diagon Alley few hours later, trying to figure out where to go to dodge a sudden late-summer shower and spend the last of their money, when they spied him.
Snape was hunched in the doorway of, incongruously enough, WitchWear Boutique –for the Discerning Witch.†Beyond the unnecessary quotation marks, there was the fact that their least favorite person was standing in the door of a women’s clothing shop -- it was just too priceless. James wished he had a camera. He did have Sirius, however, which was the next best thing. He elbowed his friend and jerked his head in the direction of the shop, and then watched as Sirius’s eyes lit up and a cocky grin made its way across his face. They glanced at each other and then quickly changed direction.
–Severus!†Sirius called out in his best cheerful, hearty voice as they walked up to him -- upon reflection, James concluded that he had probably never heard his friend call the Slytherin by his given name in the six years that they had known each other. The friendly introduction was nothing more than the joy of the hunt -- Sirius looked positively delighted.
Snape looked up and seemed to withdraw further into the corner of the doorway; James could see his hand surreptitiously reaching for his wand. He was not dressed for the weather, wearing only a T-shirt and jeans and looking cold and bedraggled. His wet hair clung to his forehead and neck.
–So,†Sirius began cheerily. –This is where you do your shopping. Explains a lot.â€
–Only when I’m shopping for you,†Snape muttered to himself, but loud enough for them to hear it. Sirius opened his mouth to say something, but nothing came out.
Even James had to concede that it was a good answer, but it was not acceptable for Snape to have the last word, so James interjected, –Really, Snivellus, still being dragged to the shops by your mum. Aren’t you a bit old for that? What self-respecting wizard lets himself be dragged to a women’s clothing shop?â€
–I’m here for the same reason any wizard would be standing here,†Snape replied, with what had to be studied boredom. –Because unlike yourself, I’m here with a girl. Really, Potter, you should try it some time. One would think that people might start to wonder.†His eyes flicked from James to Sirius, and the corners of his mouth curled with just a hint of a nasty smile.
Sirius gave what could best be described as an indignant yelp and pulled out his wand, but James pushed his best friend’s arm back down and countered darkly, –Oh, I can think of a witch I’d like to spend time with. In fact, I’m certain I’ll be spending a great deal of time with her this year.â€
He felt a brief surge of triumph -- brief, unfortunately, because his rival seemed completely unaffected and instead responded by sneering at him and commenting, –Interesting. Then why is she here with me?â€
As James struggled for some sort of witty rejoinder, a figure pushed open the door of WitchWear, and suddenly there was Lily, resplendent in what looked for all the world like Muggle tennis whites, some sort of sporty white mini-dress perfect for showing off her legs but completely inadequate for the weather. Her outfit was covered by a rather ratty standard-issue Hogwarts pullover with Slytherin colors at the neckline.
Before she could notice James or Sirius, she waved her shopping tote and announced to Snape, –As I was saying, Sev, I appreciate the chivalry and all, but I won’t have you freezing to death on my behalf. Besides, I need a new cape anyway and-- oh, hello.â€
The greeting was not entirely friendly.
–Hello!†James replied, as pleasantly as possible given the circumstances. –I hear we’re to be working together this year.â€
–Yes,†Lily said, in a very neutral tone. –So do I. Should be interesting.â€
–We should, ah, meet,†James continued. –To plan. For the year. Head Boy and Head Girl, you know.†He sounded like an idiot, and he knew it, but Snape was glowering at him by this point, which was always a good sign. –How about Friday night?†he offered.
–Sorry, already busy,†Lily chirped.
–Saturday night?â€
–Busy.â€
–Sunday, then.â€
–Won’t do-- I have to wash my hair. Come on, Sev. Goodbye!†And she linked her arm companionably in Snape’s and walked off with a toss of her head, leaving James and Sirius standing there looking after them. Snape, to his credit, didn’t even bother looking back.
There was a lengthy pause.
–I think he won,†James said quietly.
Sirius seemed to be trying to think of something to say, and finally came up with, –He’s still an ugly git.â€
–I wonder what she sees in him,†James pondered aloud.
–Who says she sees anything in him? They’re friends, remember? No point in flogging yourself, Prongs,†Sirius replied jauntily. –Come on-- let’s go before someone actually thinks we’re window-shopping for frocks.†James couldn’t argue with his friend’s logic, especially after Snivellus’s unsubtle suggestions, and he was kicking himself for losing the opportunity to use Lily’s hair-washing excuse as a chance to mock Snape. It was definitely time to go.
And that had been his last run-in with Snape and Evans before getting on the train and promptly launching into a mutually surly duel of insults with Snape in front of Lily and the entire prefect staff. Then Remus’s lack of a rousing vote of confidence, while perfectly understandable, had put a damper on what were left of James’s spirits. Even James, who had never lacked for self-confidence, had to admit that he was off to a bad start.
………………………….
Usually, if James wanted to talk to someone, he found his friends. If he wanted to flirt with someone, he found Evans.
This time, he wanted to talk to Evans, which was something of a departure.
It was early enough in the evening that a lot of Gryffindors, having unpacked their suitcases, had congregated in the common room, which had one large, rather loud crowd of fourth and fifth years batting around some sort of flying object, and smaller huddles here and there consisting of little groups of friends in animated conversation. Evans, befitting the dignity of her new position, sat by herself in a plush wing chair, one leg tucked under the other, apparently lost in a book. James could have stood there looking at her all night. Her left hand balanced the book on the arm of the chair; her right hand absently twisted a lock of that gorgeous auburn hair. She was a vision, as usual, but he actually needed to speak to her rather than contemplate her loveliness.
–Evans,†he said by way of greeting, standing in front of the chair.
–You can call me Lily,†she replied, without looking up. She managed to be both prickly and friendly at the same time, which only impressed him all the more.
–You know what you said about giving me some help,†he continued.
–Yes?†She glanced up briefly, placed her bookmark, and closed the text, looking up at him expectantly.
–I think I’m going to be needing that. I mean, really. I have no idea what I’m doing.â€
Her response this time was a bemused smile. –That almost sounds like humility, James.â€
–Almost,†James conceded. –Don’t be getting ahead of yourself.†And she smiled at him again. This time it actually appeared genuine, and this time, when James ruffled his own hair, for the first time all day he actually felt almost as cool as he supposed he looked.
Snivellus and the Head Girl by SeverusSempra
Chapter Notes: Being Head Boy-- not as easy as James Potter expected.
Chapter Endnotes: Thank you to everyone who has been so patient during my writer's block, and to my terrific beta Fresca/ Colores-- and to JK Rowling for creating these amazing characters.