“Your mom said you were out here,” came a familiar voice behind me.
I sat up quickly and ran my fingers through my hair. Lying on a grassy hill at night might have seemed strange to some people, but I knew Edward would understand.
“Come sit with me,” I told him, grinning.
I couldn’t help but examine him as the moonlight played off his face. He was very tall, with light brown hair that fell into his eyes when he was embarrassed or shy. His eyes were green-grey, and right now they were happy. He always just seemed so strong. So in control, but gentle at the same time.
He sat down and pretended to look at the stars, but I noticed his eyes flickering toward me a bit too often; his concentration was obviously elsewhere. He was always watching me, but I had only just realised it. Edward was my best friend.
“So what’s going on?” he asked softly, as if he didn’t want to talk in a normal voice so late at night.
I shrugged. “I just wanted to sit here… to be alone for a while.”
His eyes widened. “Do you want me to leave?”
I laughed. “Of course not.”
“You’re sure?” he asked, looking ready to leap up if I ordered him to.
“Yes, Edward. Besides, I’ve been out here a long time and I wouldn’t mind having a conversation.”
I watched in amusement as he slowly relaxed, the tension fading.
“What’s wrong, Ed?” I asked.
“Nothing,” he answered. “Nothing at all.” But his voice said differently, because it only took on its current quality when he was hiding something.
I gave him a disbelieving stare but laid back down as he did.
“How are you?” he asked, and I could hear the concern in his voice. He always looked out for me, especially after Tom Riddle left.
I sighed lightly, lost in thought. It didn’t hurt much anymore to think about him. It had been months since he’d gone.
“I’m not avoiding the party,” I answered softly to his unspoken question, wanting to actually believe it. We were both still, and for a moment the silence hung in the air.
My brother Richard and his wife Eliza had decided to throw yet another party for their six-month anniversary. Personally, I thought they were only celebrating their six-month anniversary because they loved to have parties; half a year didn’t seem too significant.
He broke the silence, “It’s not like you to be so cynical.” He was chuckling slightly.
I looked to my left and saw him sitting up on his elbow, scrutinising my face. I knew he could read my thoughts better than anyone had ever been able to. Far better than Tom.
“How do you know I’m being cynical?” I asked, pretending to be aggravated.
He settled back to the ground, and we stopped looking at each other.
I waited for a minute, and then he answered. “I can always tell by your face.” His tone was light, but I couldn’t help but think there was some hidden meaning to his words. “You have an easy face to read,” he added in a barely-audible voice.
“So you think you know me?” I asked, smiling.
“I think I do,” he answered in mock-solemnness.
We laid in companionable silence. His very presence seemed to comfort me.
“It’s a beautiful night, isn’t it?” he asked a few moments later.
I had been staring at the sky for what seemed like hours, but I don’t think I noticed how stunning it was until he mentioned it. The night sky looked depthless, black, and slightly haunting. Yet there was an appeal to it. A city at night just wasn’t the same. The lights dimmed the beauty of the sky.
“It’s lovely.”
“There’s no moon tonight,” he commented.
“I didn’t even notice.”
“I did. Sometimes the sky doesn’t look right if the moon isn’t there.”
“But the stars look brighter tonight.”
“I think they can shine brighter when the moon isn’t there.” His voice was so neutral that I couldn’t tell what he was thinking.
I got the feeling he was telling me something I refused to understand, but I stopping thinking about it and laughed softly. “I think the stars keep the sky company. Because, really, the sky must be lonely without the moon.”
“But all together the stars shine brighter than the moon ever could,” he told me, his voice still serious.
“Yeah… but the moon is more noticeable than the stars.”
“But the moon leaves, and the stars are always there.”
Always there, I thought, running the words over and over in my head. “That’s true,” I agreed.
“What would happen if the moon ever disappeared for good?” he questioned softly.
“The stars would be even brighter, and… I think the sky would get used to it.”
“You think it could? After all that time?”
“As long as the stars never left,” I answered, realising I had become just as serious as he was.
“They would never leave.”
Again the silence settled over us, but it was a strange silence. It wasn’t uncomfortable, but there was a sort of mystery ” some eternal question ” hanging in the air. I lay there, with the feel of grass tickling my neck and the knowledge that he was lying beside me. I suddenly noticed inconsequential things as I laid. I could feel a rock that my leg had been resting on, and I suddenly realised that it was getting colder. I shivered, and heard birds that I never had before, and started examining the stars for consolations. For once my mind refused to focus on what the conversation had just meant.
“Cecilia?” he asked.
“Yes, Edward?”
Then, without ever expecting it, the soft, meaningful words came, “I love you.”
My mind screeched to a halt as I heard his statement spoken so softly and plainly, but clearly holding an emotion that I had never before noticed in his words.
“Edward…” I began, turning my head to look at him. I tried to continue, but the words wouldn’t come.
He stood up slowly. “Don’t say anything, Cecilia. Just think about it, okay?”
I recognised the finality in his tone and couldn’t help but say indignantly, “You just said you were never going to leave!”
He laughed softly. “Pretend it’s morning.”
“So you’re going to be stalking me instead?”
I heard him laugh again, and then he left. I rolled my eyes, but he couldn’t always be with me.
I had always loved Edward, but it was always friendship, nothing more. There had always been Tom Riddle. Tom was handsome, arrogant, loud, but always joking. He was sweet, underneath the harsh exterior. But Edward was always gentle and sweet. He loved to joke too, but he was always so careful around me; he knew what would hurt me and what would make me laugh. He could sense any boundaries I might have, and he never crossed them. I thought he always cared about me, and not himself. Oh, I knew he wasn’t completely selfless, but he was always there, watching over me. It was nice to have, like a guardian angel or something, as cheesy as it sounded.
“Why aren’t you with Edward?” Mum asked as she came into my bedroom.
“I’m not always with him, Mum,” I sighed, and leafed through the pages of my book.
She laughed. “Of course you are! You two are inseparable, however you might deny it.” Then she sat on a chair a bit away from the foot of my bed, where I was lying. “You’ve been with him a lot less this past week. Did you have a fight? I haven’t seen him at all.”
“Neither have I,” I commented, not wanting to discuss anything about Edward with my Mum. After all, she loved Edward, and if I told her my problem, all I would get from her would be a blessing and a speech about how great Edward was for me. As if I didn’t know that.
“Do you want to talk about it?”
“I’m going over to see Eliza,” I said, jumping off my bed and walking towards the door. I normally wasn’t remotely rude, but my nerves were wearing thin. I knew I could talk to Eliza: she was one of my best friends, even before she married my brother.
Their house was only a few minutes away, but I ran there and made it in record time. Eliza opened the door when I knocked. She grinned when she saw it was me, but looked a little puzzled. “Come in,” she said graciously, and we walked into her bright kitchen together. “Tea?” she asked.
“Yes, thanks,” I answered and sat down, watching her as she moved around the kitchen.
“I’m actually surprised you’re here alone,” she said as she sat down to wait for the pot to boil. “It’s not like you to stop by in the middle of the week; you’re always with Edward. Unless he’s working.”
“I’m not always with Edward,” I answered a bit sharper than I usually would, because she was the second one to tell me that. I mean, the accusation was ridiculous. Edward and I were together a lot, but it wasn’t as if I couldn’t go anywhere without him.
“Almost always, dear,” she answered in her soft, patient voice.
“I come here often, though, Eliza, right?”
“Well, of course, but Edward always comes along, too. At least he has ever since… well, you know.”
“Since Tom left?” I asked bitingly.
“You’re not acting like yourself, Cecilia.” Her eyes looked hurt. Then the pot began to screech, so she got up and made tea. She set my mug before me, and then continued, “Tell me what’s wrong, and don’t lie about it.”
“It’s Edward,” I sighed, defeated. I had to tell someone. “Well, Eliza, he… he told me he was in love with me.”
She grinned. Widely. I furrowed my brow as she did so, a bit offended. “That’s wonderful! You…” But then she noticed something. “Wait, you’re not happy about this?”
“I don’t know!” I exclaimed. “I don’t know what I think, or how I feel. What about Tom? I was practically engaged to Tom, and it’s only been a few months since he left.”
“It’s been over half a year,” she reasoned with me. “And you and Edward have always been best friends; it isn’t as though you don’t know him.”
“Well, yeah…” I admitted.
“But what matters most is how you feel about him.”
“I don’t know how I feel about him. How am I supposed to?” I whined. Yes, I was officially whining, because nothing had ever been this hard to understand. Falling for Tom had been so obvious, so there. Every girl fell in love with him at some point, but Edward was harder to understand.
“How did you feel about Tom?” she asked softly.
“I loved Tom.” Hadn’t that been obvious?
“Well, of course, but how did you know that?”
“I felt like I would do anything for him, like I always wanted to talk to him. Sometimes I just wanted to smile when he was around… And I would notice things about him, and really just wanted… to understand.”
“Do you feel the same way about Edward?”
“Sort of,” I answered, “but it’s different, stronger somehow. Like I don’t want to understand things about him ” well, I do, but I already understand. And I feel safe with him, like he would never leave me, and I like it. I like the feeling I get when he’s around; it’s almost as if everything is perfect and good.” Then I looked up at her, waiting for her to answer. My face felt hot, and I knew I was blushing for saying my feelings like that.
“It sounds to me,” she said, “that you feel stronger about him than you did for Tom.”
“You mean I’m in love with him?” I asked, but as I said it, it felt right. It wasn’t strange to say, and that surprised me.
“I think you’re definitely over Tom Riddle, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you were in love with Edward. You describe it perfectly, and you look like it. You can’t see yourself when you’re around him, but I can. You’ve looked at him differently these last couple months; you look at him the way he looks at you.”
I nodded. She was right, wasn’t she? There was no other explanation, none at all. If I had been in love with Tom, I was most definitely in love with Edward.
“I think I am,” I admitted.
She nodded, and sat back. “I think you are, too. So what are you going to do about it?”
“Tell him, I guess,” I answered, blushing a little. I had to admit that I was excited.
“Good, I’m glad. You two are perfect for each other, you know. It was always obvious it was going to happen eventually.”
I rolled my eyes at her matter-of-fact tone, but couldn’t stop a small smile from coming across my face. “Think you know everything, don’t you? Going to start teaching a class on fortune telling?”
“Just go see Edward,” she laughed.
I laughed too, and started walking out the door. As I opened it, I nearly crashed into my brother.
“Whoa, sorry, Cecilia,” he said in his calm, deep voice.
“It’s perfectly fine, Richard.” I was too happy to be angry.
“Where’s Edward?” he asked suddenly, looking around. “Isn’t he here too?”
I rolled my eyes again, but was amused this time, too amused to snap at him. “I’m going to go get him.” Then, waving to him, I ran out the door.
I knocked on the door to Edward’s house and waited. He wasn’t working, was he? He didn’t usually work at this time. I was waiting impatiently, and began tapping my foot in a nervous gesture.
Suddenly the door opened, and he was standing there, leaning against the doorway in a way that seemed too casual. “Hey, Cecilia,” he said, and was grinning. “I’ve missed you.”
My heart seemed to flip, as ridiculous as it seems. I grinned widely back, and his hair fell into his eyes. I wondered if that meant he was nervous like I was, or if it meant he was embarrassed for some reason.
“You’re very silent today,” he commented, his voice amused.
“Well, normally you don’t make me stand in the doorway,” I shot back, the feeling of anxiety lifting slightly as I stood with my best friend.
“Want to come in?” he asked, nearly laughing. “Or would you prefer we took a walk?”
“A walk sounds good,” I said, and turned from him suddenly and walked around to the back of his house.
I heard a faint chuckle from behind me as the door closed and he followed me. “To the woods?” he asked as he caught up with me, and then began to walk slowly to match my shorter strides.
“Sure,” I answered, and wondered why my voice was slightly higher in pitch than usual. And why I was walking so fast. And, most importantly, why in the world I was blushing.
I suddenly felt odd, and stopped short. He stopped only a moment later, and I knew he must have been watching me, like always. What was different? But I shook my head to clear the thought, because nothing was different, nothing at all. I looked up at him, and he was raising his eyebrows at me, a small smile on his face ” an expression I couldn’t read.
“Oh, come on,” I said impatiently, and grabbed his hand to pull him onto the path to the woods. As my skin touched his, I realised that I knew what had been missing. We always held hands, innocently, because we had been best friends since we were children, and continued the tradition. My face heated as I entwined my fingers with his strong, rough, cool hand. It was such a nice, familiar feeling. I smiled up at him, and he grinned.
We walked silently. I wondered when I would tell him, or when he would ask. Part of me doubted he would ever asked, because he was always patient and would never push me.
We arrived at the fork in the path, and he naturally began to go to the left, the way we always went. I stopped, and our connected hands forced him to stop as well. He looked back at me, a silent question on his face. “Why don’t we ever go the other way?” I asked, curious. “I don’t think I’ve ever been down there.”
He shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m just so used to going this way.”
“Well, let’s try the right way, then, okay?”
He chuckled again, and followed me as I took the other path, the one I’d never been down. It was strange at first, to be in a different place, but after a while it seemed more beautiful, and better. Everything was a surprise, but it was comfortable.
The path ended, and we were in a small clearing. “It’s beautiful,” I noted, my eyes wide, as I wondered around it. I looked at the lush grass, and the patches of delicate but pretty flowers. Edward smiled slightly as he watched me.
I ran over to him. “We should have come here a long time ago,” I said.
“I’m beginning to think so too.”
The half-smile was there again, and I seemed to melt. It was the expression I loved most on him. Without thinking or even considering it, I suddenly reached up and kissed him. A small sound of surprise came from him, but after a moment he was kissing me back, softly and lovingly. I wondered vaguely if he had been waiting for that, but I was getting lost in the kiss. It was perfect, and when it was over I clung to him, and I felt safe with him pressing against me. His fingers began to stroke my hair, and I contented myself with just being, as long as I was next to him. I think I told him I loved him, but I knew there would be plenty of other times to tell him those words, because I didn’t plan on letting him go any time soon.
Over the next hour, we talked a little, kissed some more, but mostly amused ourselves with a silence that was comforting and kind. There were stolen glances, blushes, and soft smiles, because everything was new.
But then it began to get dark, so we stood up.
He looked up at the patch of sky we could see from the clearing. “Look,” he said, “the moon’s back.”
“Funny,” I answered as I looked at him, “I didn’t even notice.”
Starlight by R_Ravenclaw
Chapter Notes: So this is second in the trilogy, and I would suggest you go read The Buried Heart if you haven't already.
Thanks to BertieBotsBeans741 for being a great beta!
Lastly, please leave a review. I adore them, and respond to every one of them! Go on, make my day by typing a few words.