Chapter 43
Sunshine and Shadows
The cold, icy weeks of January plodded on and each day seemed drearier than the last. The feeble light was practically gone from the sky by the time that afternoon classes were over, making the evenings seem oppressive by comparison.
Then it happened. That one glorious day that reminds everyone that there is still beauty in the world and that spring will come just like it always has before. The sky was a perfect robin’s egg blue, the weak sun still a pale yellow but shining for all it was worth. Even the air seemed like it had been fresh-scrubbed despite its icy edge.
There was a feeling of barely suppressed jubilation throughout the halls of Hogwarts that morning. The courtyards and covered bridge were full of students taking a moment to savor the day’s promise between classes. The lucky older ones with free periods had spread their study materials on every available outdoor surface, including many of the flat rocks lakeside. The really daring ones had donned outdoor clothing in order to frolic freely among the snowy patches of lawn, their school robes discarded along with their books in shadowy corners.
From a first story window overlooking the main courtyard, Harry watched the light-hearted antics with a heaviness that he could not shake. After having assisted Tonks with her first-years, he did not have any other pressing engagements that day yet he couldn’t bring himself to join in with the merry-making. With a ponderous sigh, he retrieved the scrap of parchment that outlined Ginny’s daily schedule. Gone were the days when the simple grid provided him with a stray bit of comfort. It had become his blueprint for avoiding any chance encounters with Ginny “ or more to the point “ Ginny in the company of Robert. She would be more likely to be on the other side of the castle at this time of day, but Harry reminded himself that it never hurt to be extra cautious.
He watched the majority of the students scamper back through the Great Doors to attend their next round of classes, the echoes of their shouts and laughter dying off as they settled themselves to their routines. Pointlessly, he allowed himself to comb the edges of the lake for a glint of Ginny’s copper mane even though he knew she would not be there.
He felt a hand on his shoulder and a sympathetic voice whisper, “Thinking of Ginny, I see.”
“Just letting my mind wander,” Harry dissembled to Lupin’s sad smile as he hastily folded the schedule away.
“You know you could end this right now by just going to her,” Lupin suggested softly even though the corridor was empty of anyone save themselves.
“I really don’t think I have enough nerve to interrupt her in mid-snog,” Harry scoffed half-heartedly.
“I haven’t seen her be that indiscreet since she started seeing Robert, perhaps out of consideration for your feelings. But since when have you been such a stickler for decorum anyway?”
It was a measure of their closeness that Harry returned with a grin, “That does sound a lot more like you, doesn’t it?”
“Touché,” Lupin acknowledged the barb with a tilt of his head. “You still didn’t answer my question, though. If it hurts so much, why not just tell her now?”
A thousand reasons tumbled through Harry’s mind, but he settled for a glum, “Dunno. I’m still waiting for the right moment, I guess.”
“That perfect moment might never come, you know. Life has a way of constantly interfering.”
“You may be right,” Harry answered, assuming the same light tone that Lupin had employed. “When did you surrender to Tonks? Was it the night that Dumbledore died?”
“Yes. We talked everything over for a very long time, so it was probably closer to dawn of the next day, I suspect. After she told me that she felt the same, do you know what she said to me? That’s she’d been waiting a long time to share those words with me.”
“What was your response to that?”
“What could I say?” Lupin smiled introspectively. “I confessed that I should’ve told her sooner. In so doing, I realized how much time we’d wasted with pettiness; time that we may never get back again.”
Catching sight of the closed door to the Transfiguration classroom, Harry noted, “Remus, don’t you have a class that meets at this time?”
Lupin nodded. “I gave them a few extra minutes to review their notes before I pass out the exam papers that I’d planned for today.”
“That’s going to put a damper on their spring fever for sure.” Harry chuckled.
“Sybill Trelawney couldn’t be any worse at prognosticating the weather!” Lupin laughed wryly. “Would I redeem myself if I allowed them to leave class early one at a time as they turn in their completed exams? What do you think?”
“I’ve heard of that being done at University; I just didn’t think it was standard procedure at Hogwarts,” Harry observed.
“It isn’t, but I'm feeling generous today.” Lupin smiled warmly. “It shouldn’t be too noticeable if they trickle out one by one with explicit instructions to go outside. Any disturbances could easily be traced back to them so I can always exact a price later.”
Harry smiled in return. “I think they might just forgive you after all, Remus.”
Feeling rejuvenated in spirit, Harry made his way down the sloping lawn to his favorite rock by the lake. He settled himself against the broken tree stump and withdrew the chicken legs that he had appropriated from lunch in the Great Hall. The weak sunlight had not yet warmed the rock to a comfortable temperature but he was able to recall the spell that Mad-Eye Moody had used on the greenhouse flagstones at the Burrow. From his other pocket, he withdrew his battered copy of Long Lost Secrets of the Valley of the Kings book to do a bit of light reading.
He was soon lost in the adventure tale as he imagined Mad-Eye himself retelling it in his grainy voice to a group of awed first-years gathered around a blazing fire. He smiled as he envisioned how the spooky parts could really be milked for maximum impact. Here was a particularly good passage, he thought to himself as he read the words before him:
There was no shortage of harrowing tales about narrowly avoided curses and blights that could befall anyone who dishonored their mighty ancestors by desecrating their tombs. Despite the rifeness of these superstitions, they had summarily been discounted by grave robbers who often relieved the dead of their sacred objects within the first year after burial.
But no tale was as disconcerting as that of twin pharaohs who had been murdered at the hands of their villainous relatives, their sacred organs placed in matching jars to confuse Anubis, great god of the Underworld, when he went to weigh their worth. The legend tells that as the grave robbers attempted to extract one jar to safety, such a magnetic pull was wrought from the remaining jar that one robber was struck dead as his heart came to an abrupt halt. Even more surprising, when the two jars were brought close together in the tomb, the contents of each began to rattle ominously as if calling out to its twin. That these were one of the few examples of true cursed objects became the subject of much debate as the remaining tomb robbers each succumbed to mysterious illnesses within months of unearthing their unearthly treasure.
The last remaining robber sought to break the spell by returning all the items to the original site but died of an unexplained localized sand storm that buried him shoulder deep with the last remaining jar in his greedy hands, miles from the original site. Local legends tell of his spirit wandering from tomb to tomb in search of the lost twin, the contents of the jar rattling in warning of the presence of other cursed objects.
The sound of the raucous bird cries in the trees alerted Harry to his immediate surroundings as a new batch of students poured out onto the lawn. Absently, he watched them run down the slope in his direction as his thoughts still remained on the words of the story. Could it be that among the threads of fabrication and rumor he had just found a kernel of truth? Did the story seem to imply that each Horcrux from a similar source could call out to one another?
With deliberate casualness, Harry closed the book and returned it to the pocket of his school robes as his heart beat out an excited tattoo. Unless he was totally off the mark, his task of identifying the other Horcruxes had just become that much simpler. He would use the locket of Salazar Slytherin as a beacon of sorts to lure him to the others. Now that it had been cased in a lead-lined container, not only would its negative effects be minimized, but the metal itself would serve to amplify the kindred vibrations that signaled other Horcruxes.
He knew exactly where he would begin his search “ the Room of Requirement.
The lingering warmth of the large rock drew other students to join Harry by the lake, many of whom he remembered from Tonks’ classes. They were thrilled to have an opportunity to draw him into conversation away from the prying eyes of teachers. In return, Harry enjoyed a rare chance to joke with them in a manner that would not have been totally appropriate in the classroom.
He was not aware that the group had swelled to such a large size until it dissolved into uproarious laughter at a fifth-year’s dead-on impersonation of Tonks going on about sexism in their day-to-day activities at Hogwarts. When she got to the lament about how even the gargoyles guarding the headmistress’ office and the winged boars at the school gates were male -- she had made it her mission to check personally “ Harry was laughing so hard, he was clutching his side. He wiped the mirth from his eyes and took a closer look at the faux-Tonks, wondering if this was one of the Hufflepuffs who attended the regular mid-week cabaret session. From her tie, though, he deduced that she was a Ravenclaw whom he had not previously met. He leaned over and whispered in Leah’s ear, who after consulting with her ever present acolytes, reported solemnly that the girl’s name was Jennifer Tomlinson.
He wondered if he would catch her doing an impersonation of him in the near future, complete with tortured question-and-answer session and then subsequent grilling by an extra-shrill Ginny. Well, maybe not the last part since it was not common knowledge, unless she was able to recruit Ginny to play herself “ which would not have surprised him in the least.
“Jennifer, I’m not exactly sure that Professor Tonks would consider your impersonation an homage or not,” Harry heard Lupin’s familiar voice from behind him. “Sexism is a serious subject for any young woman who seeks to make her way in today’s world. You wouldn’t want to be hampered by society’s outdated rules, would you?”
A hushed awe fell over the group as they slowly recognized that it was Lupin in the bright blue mountaineer’s jacket and hiking boots.
Caught in the spotlight, Jennifer swallowed and asked in a remarkably small voice, “You’re not going to give me detention, are you, Professor Lupin?”
“Not this time, Jennifer,” Lupin replied solemnly. “I’m not even going to deduct any house points because so many people were enablers this afternoon that you would all just end up canceling each other out.”
There was a round of nervous laughter from the assemblage. Harry wondered why their first reaction hadn’t been to simply melt away, but he was hardly one to give them instructions.
“I’ll give you a bit of friendly advice, though,” Lupin added silkily. “I wouldn’t let the headmistress or better yet, Professor Tonks, catch you doing your little comedy sketch -- or detention is going to be the least of your worries.”
On that note of dismissal, everyone quickly gathered themselves up and made for the school building or other areas of the grounds. Harry did his best to hide his smirk until everyone was out of earshot.
He smiled up at Lupin. “I didn’t recognize you dressed in your Kilimanjaro garb.”
“Thought you might fancy a hike around the lake,” Lupin offered genially. “Minerva assured me that the trail still qualifies as being on school grounds.”
“What about that portion that goes through the Forbidden Forest?” Harry asked as he rose from his sitting position. The part where I defended Sirius from the dementors, he thought silently. No need to remind Lupin where he’d been during that episode.
“As long as you’re with me, I don’t think it will be a problem,” Lupin countered. “Keeps the hordes from following, though.”
“Tell me, Remus,” Harry asked as they set off at a brisk pace, “just what do you think Tonks would have done to Jennifer?”
“Firstly, there’s the copyright infringement issue.” Lupin ticked off the items with his gloved fingers. “Then she’d have to explain herself to Tonks’ theatrical agent “ talk about a barracuda! Then there’d be the inevitable invitations to form her own troupe in the Ravenclaw common room. Well, you see it would just spiral out of control…”
“You’re just as bad as they are, Remus!” Harry laughed. “Next you’re going to tell me that this hike is my punishment for having warmed up the rock in the first place so that they all congregated there.”
“It doesn’t count as punishment unless I make you pack rocks in your book bag, you know,” Lupin joked. “And it appears as if you are woefully unprepared for that.”
“Good thing I remembered to grab my parka to put on under my school robes, though,” Harry returned. “It’s a lot colder in the shade.”
“I know we weren’t originally scheduled for this afternoon, Harry.” Lupin steered the conversation into more serious waters. “But I was hoping for another chapter of that serialization you promised me.”
“Right.” Harry nodded as he thought of an appropriate topic. They were certainly distant enough from anyone else to worry about the confidentiality issue. “You don’t mind if I cast a muffliato spell just in case, do you?”
“Here, let me,” Lupin offered as he went through the wand motions.
“Let’s start with Sectumsempra then,” Harry offered.
“So it’s back to Severus Snape already,” Lupin commented.
“You knew? All this time and you knew?”
“You did tell me as much when you begged me to put the subject aside,” Lupin reminded him kindly. “But, yes, I knew even before that. Sectumsempra used to be Snape’s signature incantation; he was always threatening people with it when we were in school.”
“Are you aware what the spell does, Remus?” Harry asked pointedly. “Let me fill you in.” He described the events of that afternoon: his reaction to Draco’s impending curse, its aftermath, and how Snape had intervened to save Draco’s life.
“You didn’t think to try the spell out on some innocuous object first?” Remus replied quietly. “Like that tree branch.”
“I never got the chance. I know that you must think less of me after that story, Remus, but I felt that you were entitled to know the truth.”
“Did you learn your lesson, Harry?” Lupin inquired gravely. “Will you ever throw a curse without knowing its results beforehand?”
“Never! I shudder to think what could have happened if Snape hadn’t been handy enough to repair the damage. It was an amazing healing procedure he performed.”
“For one thing, Dumbledore would not have died; or at least, not in the same manner. Draco was instrumental in allowing the Death Eaters to infiltrate the school,” Lupin summarized.
“I had an opportunity to short-circuit that plan, also, if only I’d known what to look for,” Harry confessed. Realizing that he was telling the tale backwards, Harry stopped to rethink how he should begin. “Remus, you recall me asking you about the Half-Blood Prince last Christmas?”
“The chap who’d written his name in your borrowed Potions book?” Lupin clearly remembered. “How does he figure into this?”
“That chap turned out to be Severus Snape, his mother’s maiden name was Prince. Half-Blood Prince was some sort of nickname for him.”
“I can’t say I ever remember that from school, Harry. I assure you Sirius and James practically made taunting Snape into an organized sport.”
“It may have been a more private nickname than that,” Harry volunteered since he’d had time to think things through more calmly since then. “Do you think my dad picked on Snape as a way to get noticed by Lily?”
“I never really thought about it that way,” Lupin replied thoughtfully. “That might have worked against him, to tell you the truth. There were plenty of opportunities to interact with Lily since she was in our House. But by the time the Marauders were old enough to think seriously about girls, Severus had already demonstrated to Lily that he only really cared about the Slytherin lads.”
“I learned the Sectumsempra spell from the margins of that old Potions book, the only notation it had was ‘for enemies’. There were so many unusual and useful hints for potions in the book that I was lured by my successes to think that it could only offer good advice. Snape knew from the grisly results of my spell that I had employed his signature curse. He demanded that I show him all of my course books, so I brought him Ron’s Potions book instead to throw him off track.”
“Did it work?” Lupin asked with a raised eyebrow.
“Only temporarily,” Harry admitted. “He couldn’t prove me wrong, but he knew I was lying. It was as if his eyes could read my very thoughts as he stared me down. He knows I had his old book, Remus. Still have it, in fact. It’s just very cleverly hidden.”
“You have my attention,” Lupin urged.
Harry recounted hiding the book in the Room of Requirement, the overlooked Vanishing Cabinet, Trelawney’s sherry bottles and every other extraneous detail that fit into that puzzle.
“So that’s why you distrust Trelawney so,” Lupin summarized. “She had just as much an opportunity to advise the headmistress about the abandoned Vanishing Cabinet, but she didn’t. You, however, did the noble thing and led the headmistress to it.”
“Once I put the pieces together,” admitted Harry. “But I didn’t tell her about the book. It’s still sitting there where I hid it last spring. I double-checked on it right after the protocols for the Room of Requirement were tweaked and I can still get into that room.”
“Would you be willing to show it to me?” Lupin asked the question that Harry had been dreading.
But he’d had months to prepare, so without missing a beat, Harry replied, “Yes, but it cannot be removed from that room. It’s too big a risk of it either falling into the wrong hands or my not being able to access the hiding place otherwise. I’ll allow you to examine it at length, Remus, but you have to agree to my terms.”
“I can live with that compromise,” Lupin added solemnly as they neared the last part of the hiking trail. “How about on Thursday, prior to our practice sessions with the alternate wands? We’ll be using the Room of Requirement anyway.”
“Agreed. Thanks for not chewing me out over the Sectumsempra issue, though.”
“I suspect you’ve had plenty of time to do that to yourself already,” Lupin supplied with a kindly pat on the shoulder.
It was only in retrospect that Harry realized that nothing in Lupin’s reactions showed that he’d made the connection between Harry’s gut reaction to employ the Sectumsempra curse and Tonks’ defense in the alley ambush. He wondered if this was an indication that Snape’s tale concerning Lupin’s lack of compassion had been a fabrication after all.
With the start of February came Apparition lessons in the Great Hall for the sixth years. True to his word, Lupin arranged for the headmistress to lift the ban on Apparitions within the school to include the small adjoining anteroom. Personal invitations were issued to all seventh year students to attend a special workshop conducted by Tonks that would address more advanced techniques.
“Sorry I won’t be able to teach you personally,” Lupin confided to Harry. “But I’m stuck in the Great Hall keeping a watchful eye over the Gryffindors. Tonks taught me the silent Apparition technique, so she seemed a natural choice. She has a few other variations that she’s developed, also, but I didn’t prove to be as adept a student at those.”
When Saturday rolled around, Harry, Ron, Hermione and Neville joined the stream of sixth years that were headed towards the Great Hall. Harry remembered only too clearly how excited he had been at the start of that first session and how frustrated he’d been by its end. Certain in the knowledge that Robert was not present since he was only in fifth year, Harry stopped to say a few encouraging words to Ginny. He’d forgotten how much a smile from her seemed to warm him down to his toes. For a second, he considered pretending to need remedial lessons just to stay in her presence, but then saw that Lupin was watching him intently and he would never get away with it.
As he hesitated at the anteroom door, Harry noted that Lupin had gathered the Gryffindors on the closest side of the Hall. He indulged himself and cast one last lingering look in Ginny’s direction even though she was deep in conversation with another Gryffindor girl. By the time someone alerted Ginny of the extra attention she was garnering, Harry had already ducked out of sight.
The sparse furniture in the anteroom had all been moved to the walls. Harry waved in greeting to Daphne and Susan Bones who were currently engaged in an animated discussion with Hermione. He directed his attention to Tonks who was seated atop a long table with her legs swinging happily as she waited for her elite students to assemble. She returned his smile warmly.
“Welcome all,” Tonks intoned merrily. “I’m here to teach you some variations on Apparition techniques that are not currently part of the established curriculum. Some of them are routinely employed by the Auror Department in the Ministry of Magic. Others I developed on my own and are currently classified for recreational use. Don’t let that classification deter you, though. It was imposed by a group of gentlemen who were unable to master some of the more creative variations.”
Nimbly she jumped down from her perch and then caught everyone’s eye briefly to make sure she had their undivided attention. “If it’s a distraction you need,” Tonks elaborated, “nothing will beat this one.” With practiced ease, she extended her arms gracefully and turned on the spot like Wilkie Twycross was demonstrating in the next room at the very moment. As Tonks came around to her starting point, she added an extra spin with an effortless flick of her leg and suddenly she was gone amid a shower of dancing silver stars!
An appreciative gasp was heard from the onlookers whose eyes were focused on the fading pinpoints of light. Everyone jumped to hear Tonks’ voice originating from the back of the room where she had reappeared soundlessly.
“Did you see the stars?” she asked happily. “I’m never fast enough to see them myself, so I’ll just have to take your word for it.”
“That was….phenomenal!” Hermione gushed as she turned around to face Tonks.
The small spattering of applause that followed just seemed to embarrass Tonks. “That one will definitely take a while to master,” she admitted. “So we’re just going to start with learning the simple techniques for soundless Apparation.”
Methodically, she explained the proper body placement and then the feeling of lightness that was obtained by tightening the stomach and hamstring muscles prior to beginning their basic rotation. Tonks went around the room and guided them one-by-one until each had achieved their first practically soundless Apparition. After a few successive attempts, though, it was clear that everyone was short of breath.
“It takes a bit of practice before it becomes second nature,” Tonks explained. “And you have to remember to breathe or you will find yourself winded in no time. Everyone’s inclination is to hold their breath when they tighten their stomach muscles, but the secret is to contract one set of muscles without engaging the diaphragm that controls your breathing. This you can practice just about anywhere on your own.”
She was interrupted briefly as Lupin stuck his head in the door and looked over the assemblage critically. “Tell me you haven’t been telling them stories about your wild days in the Auror Department,” he admonished in a no nonsense tone.
“Of course not, Remus,” Tonks returned with an innocent smile. “I haven’t mentioned the parties at all.”
Someone tugged on Lupin’s sleeve from the other room and he was drawn away from the door. Once the door was shut, Tonks gave the seventh years her best conspiratorial look.
“He said something about parties…” Harry prompted her. He was getting used to being her back-up straight man, anyway.
“Yes, please tell us.”
“Please…”
“We won’t tell.”
Knowing she had her audience in the palm of her hand, Tonks allowed them to catch their breath as she regaled them. “The Auror Department used to have the most entertaining parties, back before Alastor Moody retired. You remember him from Halloween, right?”
“Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde?” Neville asked for clarification.
“Exactly. Now that Scrimgeour has taken over as Minister, perhaps Gawain Robards will revive the tradition. But it was Kingsley Shacklebolt who was my main co-conspirator back in Moody’s day.”
“Shacklebolt was in the genie outfit, right?” Daphne inquired. “Big earring in his ear?”
“You got it. He always sports the earring, though it’s generally more discreet.”
“I still haven’t heard any details about the parties,” Susan reminded her shamelessly.
Tonks threw her an appreciative smile before continuing, “Kingsley and I started experimenting with Disapparating from the dance floor “ just goofing off as neither of us had dates for the evening. He does this incredible move that he learned from watching Gregory Hines: turning mightily off-kilter and reappearing still in motion like a tornado. Don’t know how it doesn’t land him on his….” Tonks hesitated as she searched for the proper euphemism.
“Posterior?” Hermione suggested amid much giggling.
“…backside,” Tonks decided. “He doesn’t even seem to make himself dizzy, if you can believe it! But somehow it works for him. I ended up with the faerie lights number, or so everyone else calls it.”
“You really can’t see the starts in your wake?” Ron asked. “Blimey, that’s the best part!”
“Tell me about it,” Tonks concurred. “I’ve used it to sneak up on a lot of people that were mesmerized by my exit, though!”
After a bit more practice, their hour was up. Tonks promised she would hold another session soon but that everyone should practice today’s technique while remembering to breathe. Otherwise, it would never serve them in a true battle situation.
Ginny had already hurried off to her Quidditch practice so Harry didn’t get a chance to speak with her after the lesson. Instead, Lupin caught up with him as he left the Great Hall.
“What did you think?” he asked conversationally.
“She’s much better at the fancy stuff than you are, Professor,” Harry replied candidly.
“I’m a clumsy ox by comparison, right?” Lupin admitted with a sharp laugh.
“Not entirely, but I can’t see you doing the faerie lights number, either.”
“She showed you that one after all, didn’t she?”
“Opened with it, in fact,” Harry admitted. “But in her defense, she did say she used it as a distraction when she wanted someone to be so intent on her disappearance that her reappearance was overlooked.”
“Outsmarted again,” Lupin issued with a wry chuckle.