Loitering outside the Leaky Cauldron had always been one of Lavender’s favorite things to do when bored in London. She would lean against the dusty window and fold her arms across her chest. Tom never minded; he was an old friend of her father, and he liked nothing better than to recount embarrassing stories of Lavender’s visits as a young girl. Nowadays, she derived pleasure in thinking that in her leisurely position, she enjoyed one of the most unique experiences available to a visitor in the city: she could observe anything and everything on the block”whether a rude pedestrian or an overly engrossed couple”as closely as she liked. To the Muggle world, she was an unperson as long as she stood close to the Leaky Cauldron.
Lavender had never really been bothered by the intrusive or unwarranted nature of her actions. Just as her world was fantastical and unimaginable to Muggles, so was theirs to her. She did not feel as though she observed real people going about their lives as she stared across the street; rather, she viewed the ordinary folk traversing her field of view as actors on a stage, carrying props and delivering scripted lines.
Lavender spent little time considering the significance of her own form of people-watching. In the end, she simply needed some way to pass the time as she waited for her lunch mates to appear. Passive observation seemed wiser than any other activity that came to mind. This way she could at least dull her discomfort and her unshakable anxiety. I’m too young to be a mother, Lavender thought with a sigh. Just look at what it’s done to my nerves!
The combination of watching the scene before her and recalling her domestic situation made Lavender rather depressed. She hated feeling down, but even after three years of crudely disguised chaos she hadn’t settled into her new life. She couldn’t help thinking of Hermione Granger, who was doubtless living in a shithole somewhere among the same sort of ignorant people that milled about on the other side of the street. Lavender could not help hoping to miraculously spot her old classmate’s unflatteringly bushy head among those bobbing jauntily through the crowd. Of course, she dreaded such an impossible encounter as well. After all, she and Hermione had never been close, and Lavender internally feared what she assumed would be a confrontation. Lavender, after all, had effectively led the life Hermione would have wanted and carried it out while the unfortunate Muggle-born rotted in isolation.
On the whole, Lavender preferred not to think about Hermione.
Instead, she forced herself to cultivate interest and excitement in the prospect of lunching and”if she had her way”shopping. After all, it was not every day she could escape caring for her two baby boys of fifteen months. Luckily, her excitable babies had a pair of affectionate grandmothers who readily carved time out of their schedules when Lavender needed some time off. Whatever the circumstances of the twins’ birth, they enjoyed unabated adoration from their grandparents.
At last, Lavender spotted Parvati approaching, emerging suddenly from the tangible border of the crowd, which flowed across the street without so much as a backward glance. Lavender admired her outfit: she always knew how to dress in Muggle fashion, sporting a fabulously draped pink chemise and perfectly tailored denim jeans. Of course, Lavender knew that the only reason the clothes fit her so perfectly was Parvati’s adept knowledge of tailoring charms, but she suspected most Muggles just wrote her off as having “that sort of body, the one that fits all the clothes in the department stores.”
“Happy New Year’s Eve!” Parvati said in a singsong voice. “I brought your present.”
“And I have Hannah’s,” Lavender responded, not to be outdone. She smiled at her friend, feeling her gloom rapidly ebbing away. “I’m so glad we decided to do this.”
“Lunch will be wonderful,” Parvati agreed. She rolled her eyes girlishly. “And I wouldn’t say no to a stop in some of Diagon Alley’s stores. Oh! I can’t express how much I’ve been looking forward to some solid time with my girlfriends.”
“I understand completely,” Lavender assured her. “I doubt Hannah will be in the mood to shop, however, so let’s strive to be accommodating. Just keep reminding yourself that her salary is considerably smaller than yours.”
Parvati shrugged. “She can at least poke around, just for the fun of it,” she said. They were silent for a moment. At last, Parvati commented, “Well, I don’t see why we’re standing out here in the cold.”
The two had only just seated themselves at a table for three when Hannah appeared at the door. To Lavender’s surprise, Luna Lovegood followed their friend in and approached their spot by the fireplace. In times past, seeing the oddball appear might have caused Lavender irritation, but she found as they waved to one another that she was glad to share a Butterbeer with Luna. They had known the same hardships. One could find comfort in banding together.
“Hello!” Hannah called. “Hope you don’t mind. Luna visited me this morning”it was quite unexpected; she just appeared in my office”so I invited her along.”
Lavender smiled and pulled out her wand to Summon a fourth chair. “Not a problem,” she said. Parvati chuckled to herself.
The new arrivals took their seats, one plumping tiredly down and the other lowering herself in a birdlike fashion. Lavender took stock of their appearances: Hannah wore her professor’s robes with dignity and evident pride; Luna wore an odd assembly of contrasting patterns”most notably, a scarf with miniature dancing camels”and bizarre shell earrings. Lavender guessed that some creatures likely called the orangey shells home, as there were streaks near the rounded openings.
“Well, Happy Christmas,” Lavender exclaimed as they settled. A cheery mood pervaded, lending Lavender a feel of lighteatered ease she did not normally enjoy. “I regret not having had the foresight to buy an extra gift.”
Luna smiled sanguinely. “Do not blame yourself. Not all of us can foresee as clearly as a Dinklewrat.”
Parvati giggled. “Indeed.”
Hannah smiled kindly. “Actually,” she put in, “Luna is expected a gift of her own to shown up not too many months from now.”
Lavender’s eyebrows shot up. “Really? That’s fantastic!”
“Yes, congratulations!” Parvati said.
Luna nodded. “I’ve only just learned.”
“Dean must be ecstatic,” Lavender said.
“Yes, he is,” Luna agreed. “He’s had a rough time this past year. He frowns frequently and tends to toss about in his sleep.”
“I’m sorry to hear that,” Hannah said, adjusting her robes. “His work must be so depressing.”
“What is he doing these days?” Parvati inquired. “Is he with the Ministry? I haven’t spoken to Dean in ages…”
“Oh, yes,” Luna confirmed. “He works for the Wizengamot. Of course, justice isn’t very just, from what I can tell, especially with Dolores Umbridge in charge.”
“That must be a difficult job,” Lavender speculated. “I don’t think I would have the stamina to drag myself to work every day.”
“He manages,” Luna commented. “I try to help him by mixing Pixie powder into his tea to give him more energy.”
“Very thoughtful of you,” said Parvati. After a pause, she asked, “Does that work?”
Lavender shot her a look.
“I think so,” Luna said. “But of course I can’t do very much on days when he has to prosecute an old friend.”
“That’s terrible,” Lavender murmured.
“The worst was when he inherited Percy Weasley’s case,” Luna confided. “Whoever received it originally resigned mysteriously after they refused to proceed. Poor Dean had no choice. I don’t think he slept one wink for months.”
“Too much Pixie powder?” Parvati asked.
“He prosecuted Percy?” Lavender asked quickly.
“Yes,” Luna said with a nod. “He was nearly sent off to St. Mungo’s. Some of his coworkers thought he was going to take his own life.”
“I should hope not,” Hannah said. A somber moment passed. “You must have been his lifeline.”
“The case closed back in September,” Luna remarked. “Of course, it was terrible for Dean to watch an old classmate receive a death sentence, but at least the waiting and struggling was over. But I didn’t mind caring for him. I will never forget how kind he was to me after Ollivander and I were rescued from Malfoy Manor.”
Lavender shook her head. “Why doesn’t he just quit? Honestly, if it’s that depressing…”
Luna turned her eyes on Lavender. “Would you quit? If you knew it was hopeless, you would probably choose to do so. But then there’s the matter of consider who would replace you. At least Dean can trust himself not to abuse the prisoners in court. Besides, he is not at liberty to quit. Umbridge cleared his blood status, but really we’re all at her mercy.”
Lavender shrugged uncomfortably. “Well, I hope things work out for him,” she mumbled. “And I hope he doesn’t end up prosecuting Ron any time soon.”
“What do you mean?” Parvati probed.
“He works in the Department of Magical Law Enforcement,” Lavender explained, but I have an uncomfortable feeling that he has some sort of sideshow going on. It would destroy Molly to lose a third son, to say nothing of her husband. Still, Ronald always seems to be up to something.”
“That doesn’t sound good,” Hannah said, shaking her head.
“I think we can all agree,” said Parvati, “that it’s a full-time effort, staying out of trouble. I feel like I’ve been walking a tightwire for the last three and half years.”
“Agreed,” said Hannah. “I have to admit, I feel fairly secure at Hogwarts. Despite the obvious changes since we left school, it’s easy to pretend that the horizon isn’t so dark and gloomy.”
Tom approached their table, spotting Lavender instantly. “Hello, ladies,” he said. “Can I get you anything?”
“Good to see you, Tom,” Lavender said. Fearing he might begin telling an embarrassing story, she continued immediately, “How about some Butterbeers for the moment?” She motioned to her companions. “Enough to go around?”
“Certainly,” Tom said, inclining his head. “But don’t you run away before you and I get a chance to chat, Little Lav.”
Lavender smiled and watched him retreat to the bar.
“You mentioned Hogwarts,” Parvati said to Hannah conversationally, “and I realized we haven’t really had the chance to question you. Do elaborate.”
“Oh, well,” Hannah said, blushing slightly at the rapt attention her friends paid her, “the structure has been altered quite radically. Slughorn carried out all of the Ministry’s recommended reforms in the first year. Of course, I’ve only been teaching since September of this year, so everything feels very routine already.”
“No Sorting?” Luna asked.
“To begin with, no,” Hannah said. “But when the students reach their third year, there’s a sort of induction ceremony for those who would have been Slytherins in the old days. The students chosen form a sort of elite group.”
“How surprising,” said Parvati. “And the classes?”
“Of course, the curriculum has undergone restructuring as well,” Hannah went on. “History of Magic and Muggle Studies are unrecognizeable in their current form. Even our experience as seventh years was far less extreme. Oh, and Divination has been removed all together.”
Lavender and Parvati gasped.
“How could they?” demanded Parvati. “That class shaped my Hogwarts education.”
“Well, the higher-ups didn’t much care for the subject material,” Hannah said sheepishly. “And of course with Umbridge back on track, she personally rid the school of all its Divination teachers. Trelawney was a thorn in her side from all those years ago”and Firenze, of course, is a half-breed.”
“I hate that woman,” Lavender spat.
“Which one?” Tom said from behind her.
“Dolores Umbridge,” Luna clarified, twirling her wand in her hair.
“Oh, her,” Tom said darkly. “I wouldn’t shout that quite so loudly if I were you. She came in her the other day. She was so irritated when she spilled her drink on herself that she threatened to send a Ministry health inspector over.”
The group retrieved their Butterbeers from the tray in Tom’s hands. He scuffled away, shaking his head and muttering under his breath.
“I feel as though I’ve painted a completely black picture o the situation at Hogwarts,” Hannah said after a while. “To be honest, the discipline and watchfulness can disturb me at times, but on the whole, the kids are no different than we were. Resilient little creatures! And though he complies with all the decrees that the Department of Education sends along, Slughorn has been a decent Headmaster. He is not at all the dictator that Snape was during his short time.”
“Good riddance,” Parvati said in a firm tone. “Snape got what he deserved.”
“Well, I’m glad to hear that Hogwarts hasn’t become a little Azkaban,” Lavender commented. “After all, the twins are almost fifteen months old. I have to start worrying about their education!”
Hannah and Parvati laughed. Luna smiled tranquilly into her lap.
“I really must go visit them again,” Parvati exclaimed. “They must miss their Auntie terribly.”
Lavender rolled her eyes. “I think they are a little young to miss anything other than the Bertie Bott’s you brought over last time.”
“Are we going to order food anytime soon?” Hannah asked. “I’m developing a pang in my stomach.”
“Not to worry,” Lavender said. “I’ll call Tom over.”
* * * * *
“You’ve never looked more beautiful,” Parvati murmured from over Lavender’s shoulder. She waved her wand at the set of tiny white roses on the boudoir. The blossoms floated gently and obediently nestled themselves in Lavender’s intricate twists and turns of hair.
Lavender studied herself in the mirror. She was indeed beautiful; everything about her looked perfectly coiffed, perfectly arranged, all perfectly perfect. Her voluminous white dress, her hair piled artfully on her head, her makeup and her nails all looked ready for a wedding. Parvati had genuinely outdone herself, to her great pleasure. The moment Lavender had said she was in need of a wedding stylist, her dearest friend had immediately insisted that, for old times’ sake, she allow Parvati to paint her nails, do her hair, and of course pick out the dress. And here they were, admiring her craftsmanship. Everything looked stunning”even the modest engagement ring on Lavender’s finger.
“Just you wait until Ron sees you,” Parvati continued, her voice kind. She knew this was a tough day for everyone, but despite the upsetting back story, Parvati wanted the bride to remember this day with a wistful smile. As her best friend, she felt Lavender was entitled to happy memories.
“How much longer?” Lavender asked absentmindedly, touching her face with her bejeweled hand. The movement seemed more strenuous as usual, as if her engagement ring weighed her down.
“Oh, maybe half an hour,” Parvati said, purposefully casual. “I’m quite sure your dad will fetch you soon.”
“Are my flowers here?” Lavender asked, taking a breath and allowing herself to relax. She knew Parvati meant well, and she, too, wanted to enjoy the wedding. It wasn’t a dream ceremony, though: they had only had a few weeks to plan it all, and every venue they asked was double-booked. So many weddings all at once! one hotelier had exclaimed in his apologetic note. I’m afraid we can’t accommodate you within the time frame you’ve requested. Have you tried the Green Dragon?
“Right here,” Parvati said, passing the bouquet. Lavender admired the miniature roses with a semblance of happiness. It must have taken Parvati hours to shrink each and every one and assemble them.
“I had better fix my own makeup,” Parvati said critically, watching her reflection as she turned her face from side to side. “Any blush that may have been on my face this morning has all but disappeared.”
“Don’t be silly! You look splendid,” Lavender chastised with a giggle. Though her Hogwarts memories were at least one year old, her memories were fresh. She still felt like a schoolgirl in many ways.
She rose carefully, mindful of her dress. A rip could easily derail the joyous occasion. It had been her mother’s gown, after all, and they would both be devastated if the fabric accrued the least bit of damage.
Nothing was ideal about the wedding, in truth; it was on a Thursday, and only after Ron had evoked the memory of his father had the owner of the Green Dragon consented to pencil them in. At least they had gotten August, per their request. The month pleased everyone, including the Ministry. On the other hand, the Green Dragon could hardly accommodate the entire scope of Ron’s and Lavender’s families, so they had both been forced to limit the guest list to their closest family and friends. Some relatives had sent angry letters: Ron’s Aunt Muriel, for example, had been so rude as to send a Howler. Lavender had burst into tears. The stress was overwhelming: a wedding with someone who did not truly love her and a deadline with consequences attached already loomed over her head. Ron had done his best to comfort her, of course, but that had never been his forte, and his helplessness had only worsened the situation.
Others had been more understanding in their notes. They saw the situation for what it was: a bargaining chip to redeem young couples in the eyes of the Ministry from “past indiscretions,” as the Loyalty Department would have it. Besides, they noted, it was difficult to attend a Thursday wedding anyway.
“Wipe that frown off your face this instant!” Parvati commanded. “As imperfect as today is, it is still your wedding day. I have worked my arse off to beautify it, and I intend for you to enjoy it.”
Lavender smiled gratefully. “You’re right,” she said, slightly cheered. She glanced in the mirror once more. “Do I look ready to you?”
“Ready?” Parvati scoffed playfully. “You are the very image of a blushing bride.”
“That she is,” said a deep voice.
Lavender whirled around to spot Ron in the doorway. She could not help it; a contended smile crossed her face. He’s going to marry me, she thought, her heart skipping a beat.
Ron smiled back. “You look amazing,” he said genuinely.
Parvati clucked angrily. “You’re not supposed to be here! Go take your place up front. Mr. Brown will be here any moment.”
Ron looked sheepish. “Sorry, Parvati. I’ll go in a moment.” He gave Lavender a look. The heaviness in his eyes was unmistakable.
“Parvati,” Lavender said suddenly, “would you mind getting me a glass of water? I’m rather parched.”
Her friend looked a little taken aback, but she nodded and stepped out of the room.
Ron approached her, his hands reached uncertainly out towards her. She took them and allowed him to pull her into a friendly hug. He held on longer than usual, laying his cheek on the crown of her head. Lavender kicked herself mentally for enjoying it.
“Are you feeling all right?” she asked his shoulder, her forehead leaning delicately against him.
“I guess so,” he said quietly.
Lavender braced herself mentally. In a level voice, she said, “You don’t have to do this, Ron.”
Ron pulled away and held her arms’ length. He looked at her stubbornly, eyes bright against his pale, freckled skin. “Yes, I do,” he stated.
Lavender sighed and returned his gaze. “Are you ready to go in then? As Parvati made clear, it’s nearly time.”
Ron hesitated. Lavender knew he was stalling. She reached up to touch his cheek gently, using the hand that did not bear a ring. He let out a sigh and closed his eyes. He seemed frustrated with himself but she could tell he was trying his hardest not to show it.
“Listen,” Lavender began, ducking her head. “I know you don’t love me, Ron.”
He clenched his jaw.
Lavender tried again: “I understand how you feel. If it didn’t mean hope for the future, neither of us would be here today. This is our way to get by, as unfair as that is.”
“I know that,” Ron said forcefully, opening his eyes to stare down at her. “I do care about you, though,” he added. A twisted grin touched his face. “Otherwise I wouldn’t be able to stand marrying you.”
Lavender laughed. He had always had that gift of breaking tension with a tactless comment. She found it endearing. So had Hermione, she recalled. This thought sobered her.
“Today means a lot to me,” she said. “I care deeply about you, too.” She bit her lip, hearing the asymmetry between her comment and his. “But Ron, I know I can never replace Hermione. Believe that I understand that.”
Ron looked anguished, but he nodded.
Lavender paused before continuing, “I don’t think the future we used to imagine has disappeared forever. We just need time to rebuild our lives… wait for the stars to realign…” She chose not to mention how often she had pictured this very future”well, the one in which she was his bride”while a student at Hogwarts. She was no longer that girl in so many ways, she realized. Dark times had forced her to sober up.
“To figure out a way to the other side of this mess,” Ron agreed.
“And Ron, I promise you that… that…” Lavender’s throat closed unexpectedly. She pressed her lips together firmly. A voice in her head chanted, Don’t ruin the makeup! Don’t ruin the makeup! The moment passed, and Lavender continued, “Merlin willing, I will step aside when that day comes, that day when you are reunited. I swear it, Ron,” she finished, voice trembling. She was glad, despite the agony of saying the words, to have finally given them voice.
Ron stared at her, a plain expression of gratitude on his face. Lavender forced a smile. He smiled back, and in a swift gesture, he swept her against him and kissed her. It was not a passionate kiss, but a soft kiss of as much love and affection he could muster. Lavender thought vaguely that he had never been very good with words, but physically, she understood him perfectly.
He retreated after a short time. She could hear him breathing quietly, and he looked saddened. She hoped her kissing was not to blame. He did, on the other hand, appear calmer and more prepared.
Ron stepped back, examining her. “Thank you,” he said simply. The twisted smile returned as he looked her up and down. “I’m afraid you’ll need to redo your lipstick, though…”
Horrified, Lavender whirled to look in the mirror, hands gravitating towards her face. She let out a gasp; he was right. She could not get married with lipstick untidily smudged on her face. She glared at Ron in the mirror. He chuckled and wiped his mouth with his hand. How typical.
At this moment, Parvati burst in with a cup of water. She shot Ron a disapproving look. “Move along,” she commanded. He raised his hands in defeat.
“I meant no harm,” he joked. To Lavender, he said in a pleasant voice, “See you in a bit.”
“See you,” she repeated breathlessly to his reflection. He left with a chuckle, his hands shoved in his pockets and his step lighter than Lavender had seen in ages.
Once he had disappeared, Lavender turned her attention to her face, carefully composing her features. She had gotten a little carried away. It was difficult, knowing she cared more for Ron than he did for her. Hers was an endless struggle of suppressing feelings, but sometimes she slipped up. Letting her affection show was a mistake… But how unfair it was, to be marrying a person for whom she cared a great deal and to never be allowed to show her heart to him! Lavender wondered if their arrangement could possibly be harder on her than it was on him. Of course not, she told herself harshly. And let’s stick to the task at hand! It did not matter, anyway; she had to finish getting ready for her wedding.
“Here’s your cup of water,” Parvati said grudgingly. “I hope you’re still thirsty.”
“A little, yes,” Lavender consented, turning to smile innocently at her friend.
Parvati let out a little scream, followed quickly by a second. “Your… your lipstick! Oh no! and”ugh! Now my arm is all wet…”
Lavender laughed freely. “Don’t worry, it’s just water,” she consoled.
“That may be, but the greater crisis is on your face! Ack! I knew I should have kicked him out. Now where has that blasted lipstick gotten to?”
The Dunnest Smoke of Hell by Scarlet Crystal
Chapter Notes: "You and I are past our dancing days."
-- Romeo and Juliet