'Ahhhhhh!'
'-Petun- what the blazes is going on?'
'Vernon! Oh, Vernon!'
'Petunia, dear? What's going on? Who's that screaming? Is it Dudley? Has something happened to our Dudders? Petunia, stop screaming! Tell me what's going on!'
'Vernon! It's.... oh, it's....'
'Pety, I’m on my way! Please stop screaming!'
'The... boy! It's the boy!'
'What? Which boy? Is it Duddy-Kinns? What happened? ... Petunia! What is that you're holding? Who's that letter from? And who is that crying - what's that in the basket? Petunia?'
'Oh, Vernon! I think it's... him! Oh, what are we going to do? And what is going on? What's he doing here? Vernon!'
'Let's go in the house, Petunia! Quickly, before the neighbors notice anything!’
'Oh, Vernon! Make him stop screaming! '
'WILL YOU SHUT UP, YOU LITTLE MONSTER! OR I'LL SHUT YOU IN THE CUPBOARD!'
'Uh, Vernon? I don - I don't think that's going to work. Don't look at me like that! It's only.... I mean, he's only... how old is he? Around Dudders age? So he's only about a year old. He doesn't even know what you're saying!'
'Petunia! I'm trying my best! If you think kissing and cooing him will do the trick, feel free! He's howling on the top of his lungs- and he has got lungs- and I want him to stop!’
‘Vernon! I was only saying that I don’t think that bellowing at him would make him be quiet! I don’t want to kiss him!’
‘Well, do what you think would work!’
‘Fine, I’ll try! Harry? Harry, could you please be a little quieter? Stop sniggering, Vernon! Harry, please stop crying! – Oh, Vernon, by all means, lock him in the cupboard! I don’t care! If he continues to be so loud, he’ll wake Duddy!’
‘Seems I wasn’t so wrong after all’
‘Vernon, please! Don’t be mad at me!’
‘Sorry, Petunia, darling. There, Haro- I mean Harry- enjoy your stay in the cupboard! And SHUT UP!’
‘There, that’s better. Now, tell me what happened, Petunia’
‘Well… oh, I don’t know, Verny! I went to get the milk today, as usual, and… that is what I found! And some letter!’
‘I knew something like this would happen. I just knew’
‘How did you know, Vernon?’
‘Weird stuff on the news yesterday… and odd people on the streets… And such an odd cat!’
‘What are you talking about? And why didn’t you tell me?’
‘I didn’t think it was something to worry you about, honey. It might have been nothing.’
‘Tell me what happened!’
‘Well, on the way to work I saw a cat who appeared to be reading a sign, and then loads of people in odd cloaks, partying… whispering the name Potter and then in the news… owls…’
‘Owls? Reading cats? Partying people in cloaks, whispering my sister's surname? Nothing to worry about?’
‘Petunia, calm down. The name is a common one, and doesn’t it sound crazy? You would have thought I was going mad’
‘I would not have! But what is done is done, and if it were nothing, you are quite right, I would not have wanted to have been worried’
‘Let’s read the letter, it might tell us more. Give it to me’
‘No, let me hold it! You would not hold it on the right hight!’
‘Urg… how about we sit down in the drawing room?’
'All right.’
…
‘Oh, Vernon! Look what it says here! Lily, dead!’
Petunia, honey. It’s all right…’
‘Ver- Vernon! I know we didn’t always get along. But…she was still my sister. She can’t be dead.’
‘Tuny, dear, you haven’t spoken in years. Will it, uh, really be so different? Oh, Petunia, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean- Petunia, and can I make you some tea? Or get you something else? Here are some tissues, darling…’
‘Thank you, Vernon, you sweetie.’
‘Let’s keep reading, alright hon?
‘Mhm…’
…
What’s this? MAGIC? They put some magic on our house?’
‘Vernon, I think we should continue reading. I don’t understand what the, uh, letter writer is saying… I don’t get it… I mean, why should someone want to kill Harry? And Lily, dead…’
‘Yes Petunia darling, quite right. Quite right you are...…’
…
‘So let me get this straight. We should take in this… boy because some Looney who disappeared without a trace might be after him? And some spell has been placed on our home? Barbaric! Preposterous!’
‘But Vernon, we can’t … not do it, can we? Well, where would he go?’
‘What do I care? We could send him to an orphanage, or something. I don’t care for the boy and I didn’t care for his parents nor any of this magic tosh. And I thought you didn’t either!’
‘Well, I don’t. But… I know she was a freak, but … she was still my sister, and she died, and… he’s her son… and I don’t know, I feel like I should do this for her’
‘So all of a sudden you decide to forget the facts that you haven’t had contact for years and that you think she’s awful and that you hate her?’
‘Well, no. But… I mean look at what the letter says; she died in protecting him, so if we don’t take him in, she would have died for nothing. And I know we didn’t get along, but… I didn’t want her dead and … she gave her life for him, so I think we should do this. I don’t want to either, you know’
‘Petunia, I won’t have one in the house. You know what that would mean’
‘Yes, I do’
‘Do you really want to take him in? You are positive about this?’
‘Yes, I am’
‘Alright, if that’s really what you want…’
‘It isn’t, but I feel I - we must do it’
‘Alright, alright. You’re getting all noble-‘
‘-I am not!’
‘Fine, you’re not….Anyway, our second problem is the… uh, ma-’
‘-Psht! The windows are open, and Mary, the next door neighbor, is working on her flowerbed- what will the neighbors think if we suddenly have Harry in the house? We have to come up with something! A story to tell them! And I’ll go close the windows…. Yup, there’s Mary barely seven meters away- Vernon! She’s coming over!’
‘What?’
‘Oh, hello, Mary! Nice flowers you have there’
‘Hi Petunia! Thank you so much. I do enjoy gardening, and these flowers are my favorite. You looked a little distressed so I thought I would come over and see if I could do anything for you. Are you okay?
‘Oh, that’s very kind, Mary, but I’m fine. Really.’
‘Well, okay, if you say so’
‘Thank you, though’
‘No problem! And bye for now!’
‘Bye! …oh, she’s gone! Thank goodness! If she- or any of the neighbors found out!’
‘Well, we’ll just have to be careful, won’t we?’
‘We’ll have to tell them something’
‘We’ll say… we’ll say his parents, your sister and that Potter guy, died in…’
‘A car crash? Or perhaps a fire? Both are pretty common…’
‘A car crash. I think they are more common than fires- at least in this part of the country- and that way we could explain his horrible scar! It could have happened in the accident’
‘Yes, that works. And so we had to take in their son’
‘Yes. That’s believable, isn’t it? So now about the, uh, m-word, yes…hm…you don’t suppose there is some way to stop someone becoming one?’
‘I don’t know’
‘I know what we’ll do. We’ll just press it out of him. That’s good. We just won’t tell him anything. How would he become, uh, one if he didn’t believe in anything, um, unnormal?
‘Hm. That might work. We’ll just tell him the same story everyone else gets’
‘Yes. And he won’t be allowed to believe in anything. If he get’s the wrong ideas….And what about Diddy? He’ll be such a bad influence! That boy shall not be permitted to have anything to do with our Diddy.’
‘Oh, our poor, poor Diddy! What can we do? He can’t have his childhood ruined!’
‘He won’t. I’ll make sure of that!’
‘We’ll have to make sure Dudley knows that Harry is not to be played with and that he is way too good for him! Dudley, with some wizarding scum! I can’t even think about it. Poor, poor Diddy.’
‘We’ll make sure Dudley will be treated a thousand times better. Don’t worry. Harry will have to watch out!’
‘Good. And where should he sleep? He can’t have Dudley’s room! Where would poor Dudders put all his things?’
‘No, of course he can’t. He’ll just stay where he is. In the cupboard. That’s enough room for him’
‘I agree.’
‘Look! There’s more on the letter!’
‘What does it say?’
‘It says: I hope you will take Harry in as if he were yours and treat him like a second son. –he is no son of ours! Well, anyway then it says: Thank you very much for doing this, it means a great deal. I am sure Lily would have been glad. Harry will attend Hogwarst School for Witchcraft and Wizardry from the age eleven. –he will, will he?
All the best wishes to you, your family, and Harry.
Albus Dumbledore
P.S. I have added some Lemon Drops. I am sure you know them. They are a delighting Muggle Treat, and I am posotive you will enjoy them.
‘Lemon Drops? He’s mad! He’s giving us Lemon Drops? What’s he playing at, trying to het on our good side? And harry will certainly not attend this crackpot school, thank you very much. And who is this Albus Dumfleore? Telling us what Harry will do and what he won’t? I ask you…’
‘Well, he is the headmaster of the wizarding school. And speak more quietly; we don’t want anyone to hear us. Even if the windows are all closed’
‘Headmaster…. That gives him the right to tell us what we should do?’
‘No. but he is very powerful.’
‘How do you know who he is, anyway?’
‘Lily…’
‘He’s a freak, just like the rest of them. Let’s forget about him, what can he do to us? He can’t know how we treat Harry or what we do in our house and he can’t tell us what to do. Don’t look at me like that, Petunia- do you really think he can spy on us in our own home?’
‘No, Vernon… of course not… but I think it will be hard not to do what he wants…’
‘Codswallop. So, going over what we have discussed, Harry will stay in the cupboard under the stairs and we will press the, uh, you-know-what out of him, and not tell him anything. Good. And I will not be spending any money on him. He get’s Dudley’s old things and he’ll go to the state schools. Is that settled?’
‘Yes. And I think I heard Dudley waking up. I should go and check on him, then make him some breakfast. And -sadly- I better make a little for Harry, too. It will be interesting to see how Dudley will react to him… Will you stay to eat or head out to work?’
‘Hm,… it’s already eight AM, so I better get going’
‘Bye, and have a good day!’
‘And I’ll burn this letter. And throw away these disgusting things… Lemon Drops, really…. It is safer that way. Oh, and I Harry doesn’t need a highchair, will he?’
‘No. he can live without.’
‘Sure, bye then, love! And give Dudley a kiss from his ole father.’
‘I will. Bye, sweetheart!’
What now? by LuNaLoVeGoOdLoVer
Story Notes:
My thanks, of course, go to JKR *dances around in her amazing world*
Chapter Notes: And thanks to another Alyssa (ron lover) for your support! Without you, this story would still be incomplete.
Chapter Endnotes: I hope to earn some shiny housepoints with this fic. That would make me happy. But getting reviews would make me even happier! *hinthinthint*