“I don’t want to hear it, Nymphadora. I have made up my mind.”
“Too bad for you, Lupin. My mind is made up too. Whether you want to listen or not, you are going to hear what I have to say. Professor McGonagall is right, Dumbledore...Dumbledore would think this was the perfect time for you to come down off your high horse and admit you love me.”
“Ah, Dora, I do love you. That is why I can’t-”
“Not can’t, Remus, you won’t. You won’t love me, Remus. You have some strange idea that I deserve better than you-”
“You do. I have nothing to offer you. I have no money; hell, I don’t even have a job or any prospects to get one. I am way too old for you; I am almost old enough to be your father. Okay, not quite, but you know what I mean. Dora, don’t you see, I am all wrong for you. Being around me is dangerous. You would be an outcast just as I am. That may not mean anything to you, but what about when you lose your job as an Auror-”
“Like that hasn’t already happened?”
“You know once this is over, you will be an Auror again. But, I will still be a werewolf. Nothing is going to change that, nothing.”
“So, let’s take this once again, one at a time. First, you are too poor. Do I look like a person to whom money matters? Well, do I?
“No.”
“Second, you are too old for me...”
“Can’t argue that one, now can you?”
“Yes, I can, just give me a minute.”
“Take all the time you need. After all, I am only getting older...”
“Very funny, Remus. If we take off one day for every month when you aren’t yourself, over let’s say, thirty-four years...that comes out to almost a year and a half off your age. Then we can add a couple years to my age because everyone knows girls mature faster than boys...”
“Dora...”
“So, that removes let’s say three and a half years. Now, that brings the difference down to eight and a half years. If we give me another year for being a wonderful Auror, and we take off a year for your Marauder time, we are down to six and a half years. I don’t think that is all that big of a difference.”
“That isn’t how life works, you can’t just go changing ages to suit your needs.”
“Well, why not? Give me one good reason why I can’t.”
“Dora, the fact is I am twelve years older than you. All of your reasoning just doesn’t change it.”
“So, we have established I don’t care about money, and there is only in reality six and a half years between us, now on to the next argument...what was it again?”
“It is too dangerous for you to be around me, I am a danger to you. And-”
“Oh, that’s right, the whole werewolf thing.”
“Yes, the werewolf thing.”
“Let me ask you this, have you ever, even once, hurt someone when you were transformed?”
“No.”
“Didn’t think so. Now, correct me if I am wrong, but for about two years during school, you didn’t even stay locked up during the full moon.”
“I had others with me, Sirius, James...”
“Yes, yes, Sirius, James and Peter...though how much did Peter actually keep you in line? You could have eaten him for a snack and looked for more. But, that isn’t my point. My point is, you never once hurt them or anyone else then. And let’s see, you spent a year teaching here and didn’t hurt anyone.”
“I almost did. I almost hurt Harry, Ron and Hermione. If Sirius hadn’t been there...”
“But he was so that point is mute anyway. You are controllable when you take the Wolfsbane Potion-”
“Which doesn’t cost a few Knuts. It isn’t cheap to buy.”
“Why buy it? I am a damn good potion maker myself, you know? So, Wolfsbane Potion calms you and you can curl up in either the basement or attic a harmless wolf. Alone. Problem solved. And the last point...my being an outcast.”
“Yes, you will be shunned the same as I am. I can’t do that to you.”
“Do that to me? Do that TO ME? Remus, I have been shunned and an outcast my entire life. Daughter of a Muggle-born wizard and a Black who was disowned. And to top it off, a Metamorphmagus. Try growing up like that. People hear you are the niece of one of the most famous Death Eaters, cousin to an accused murderer of not only Lily and James but of Pettigrew and twelve Muggles. Let’s also throw in my Muggle-born father and the fact I can change what I look like at the drop of a hat. Oh, that all just adds up to everyone liking and trusting me, doesn’t it?”
“Dora...”
“Don’t you Dora me, Remus Lupin. I have always been on the outside looking in. What the hell do I care? I don’t. Either you like me for who and what I am, or you don’t. It doesn’t matter one way or another to me. What matters to me is you, and you alone. Don’t you see? Don’t you understand? I love you.”
“Dora, I love you too, but it isn’t right. I can’t take the chance on hurting you.”
“Grrrr, if you say that one more time, I am going to hurt you. You would never hurt me, I trust you.”
“When I change, I am not me anymore. That night, the night Sirius escaped, I would have killed Harry. Harry, son of one of my best friends. Don’t you see? I can’t be controlled. How do you think I would feel to come out of a transformation and find I hurt you? No, I won’t take that chance.”
“Okay, so turn me.”
“WHAT?”
“You heard me, turn me into a werewolf too. Then we can always be together and there won’t be any need for you to fear hurting me.”
“I can’t believe you just said that to me. I...I...NO! If by some miracle I didn’t kill you, I could never subject anyone to this life. Don’t even think about it.”
“Okay, so then let’s see. We can use the Wolfsbane Potion and maybe, just maybe, yes...that will work.”
“What will work? Dora, what are you thinking?”
“Well, I can morph, right?
“Yeah, but how will that help? You are still human when you morph, Dora.”
“Yes, but my ability to morph should make it easier to become an Animagus. I will learn to become an Animagus to keep you company.”
“Dora, you can’t choose what you would become. If James and Sirius hadn’t been such big animals, it wouldn’t have helped me. As it was, it was often both of them at the same time keeping me in check.”
“Oh, I think I know what I would become...a wolf.”
“How do you figure that?”
“Well, your Animagus form represents who you are, right? What represents who you are deep down inside. So, because I love you so deeply, how could I be anything else?”
“I doubt you would be a wolf, Dora. Probably something like a chameleon or maybe a butterfly...Oooff! What did you do that for?”
“A butterfly? You think I would be a butterfly? How insulting. No, I would be a wolf, definitely.”
“Dora, look, it took them years to become Animagi.”
“They didn’t have help. I will talk to Professor McGonagall. I’m sure she will help me.”
“No, it’s too-”
“If you say dangerous, I am going to hit you again.”
“Well, it is. No, I won’t allow you to do it.”
“You won’t allow me to do it? Like you could stop me. Anyway, if you really don’t want me to do it, then you know the answer, the way to stop me.”
“Dora, no, I can’t...we can’t.”
“Yes, Remus, we can. Unless you can come up with a better argument than you have already tried...”
“There’s a war going on.”
“I wondered when you would try that one. Let’s see, Molly and Arthur were married during his first rise to power and here we are, it’s happening again, and they are still married and happy, with seven kids to show for their love.”
“Kids, what about kids? We can’t be sure, no one knows...They could be like me. Would you want to do that to a poor innocent baby?”
“That’s a good one. You know as well as I do, you can’t pass Lycanthropy on genetically. Our children would not be affected by your condition.”
“But we don’t know that for certain. We don’t know...”
“Remus, give up. Stop fighting me. We love each other and that is what matters. There isn’t a problem we can’t overcome together.”
“Dora, come over here and sit with me. You know, this spot here by the lake used to be one of our favourite places to hang out. On hot days, we would all go swimming. There was one time, James thinking to impress Lily, decided to tease the Giant Squid. He was almost squid food until Peter jumped in and pulled him out. Sirius and I just thought he was playing around trying to get Lily to jump in.”
“I wrestled with the Giant Squid once. Charlie Weasley and I thought it would be fun. I’ll tell you this, if I can handle the Giant Squid, there is nothing you can throw at me that I can’t handle.”
“Dora, I just don’t know. I do love you, you have to understand that. I just love you too much to take a chance on hurting you.”
“I’ll make you a deal.”
“What?”
“I’ll jump in this lake right now and wrestle with the Giant Squid again. If I beat it, then you give up and let me love you.”
“And if you lose?”
“I won’t. I never lose. When I want something, I always get it.”
“Dora, no, don’t...”
“Oh, damn, this water is freezing. Okay, maybe another deal.”
“Nope, Giant Squid...”
“Fine. Fine, I’ll wrestle the squid.”
“Dora, honey, no, I’m only joking. Come out of the water. There’s a good girl. Now look at you, soaked clear through. Here, let me dry your robes.”
“Thanks. I forgot how cold the lake is. Guess it is a bit too early yet for a swim. So, how am I going to prove to you that I am safe with you?”
“You don’t have to prove anything to me.”
“Yes, I do. It is the only way you will stop this nonsense about being dangerous to me. Let me think...”
“It doesn’t matter-”
“Doesn’t matter? Of course it matters.”
“No, let me finish. It doesn’t matter what you do. I will still believe I am a danger to you. You can’t change my mind about that.”
“So, now what? We just forget that we love each other? We go on being miserable apart instead of happy together? Is that what you really want?”
“Yes, no, I don’t know. I do love you.”
“Then stop fighting with me and kiss me.”
“I-”
“Wait, I got it. When you cast a Patronus, what does it represent?”
“It represents what you love and feel protected by...”
“Exactly. Expecto Patronum!”
“Is that a-”
“Wolf. Yes, it is. Now what does that tell you?”
“That you are delusional.”
“Remus...”
“Oh, all right. Have it your way then, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. Dora, I love you. Now, shut up and come closer so I can kiss you.”
“I never thought you’d ask. But, just for the record, I love you too.”
To Win his Heart by mudbloodproud
Chapter Notes: I wish to thank Bine (luinrina) for looking this over on a moments notice.
I do not own anything you recognise in this story. It all belongs to J.K. Rowling. I am just thankful to be able to play in her world for a little while.