Maybe I've loved you
Since before the mountains
Were hills and ached for the sky...
I was trembling as I stood in the heart of the tight knit bunch of my fellow students.
To our left was a raised platform with a long table, where the teachers were sitting, all of them staring at us. To the right were the four long house tables crammed full of students; they too were staring at us, and one of the reasons I had tried to hide myself in the very middle of the group.
But there would be no hiding when I was called forward to put that patched hat on.
I stared out at the large body of students to try and find my sisters, Amentia and Aeron. I spotted them sitting at the Ravenclaw and Slytherin tables respectively. Neither of them were looking at me, they were both peering intently at the small stool on which a girl, whose name the Professor had announced as Holly Fawcett, was sitting, the large hat falling about her eyes.
As the hat announced her Ravenclaw, it was Amentia who cheered and clapped along with her classmates.
My stomach lurched in fear. My surname was Flint, and would be called very soon. I glanced at the girls who I had sat with on the train: Clarabelle Maggs, a tiny girl with mousey hair, and Regan Rabnott, who was tall and dark. They showed none of the apprehension I myself held.
I firmly gripped my little lucky wishing stone, my favourite childhood toy that I had refused to leave behind, however childish it might seem. As I held it, I wished that I could be with them, even just one would be fine; I just wanted to know someone in my new house.
Suddenly, my name was called.
Flint, Clariss!
Shaking more than ever, I pushed my way through the students, who seemed to be packing closer together, and now I wished I had chosen to stand closer to the edge, just so I wouldn't look as ridiculous as I did now.
After a momentous effort, I was free and out on my own, where I suddenly felt exposed as the weight of hundreds of pairs of eyes fell on me. It felt difficult to walk straight, but somehow I managed it and reached out to grab the stool before I sat and waited for the hat to be placed on my head.
The advantage of having two sisters already at Hogwarts presented itself again at this moment as I heard the gentle whisper of the hat's voice in my ear. I did not jump in shock, as some students had already done; thankfully Amentia had told me about the Sorting Ceremony in her very first letter home two years ago.
Another Flint, I see, the hat whispered to me. Goodness, you're all so different, which is a good thing, I suppose... nothing like a bit of variation. I think you'll do well in GRYFFINDOR!
I blew a half sigh of relief as the hat shouted that last word to the rest of the hall, and the table on the far right erupted in cheers. But I also felt myself sink slightly; I had been sorted away from my sisters, and the one vein of friendship and protection I could have fallen back on if I was sorted into Slytherin or Ravenclaw, was gone.
I sat down next to a brown haired boy with freckles that I recognised from the trip across the lake, and thankful now that all the eyes were off me, I looked back to my fellow first years. They all looked so funny, I thought, standing there like a bunch of scared rabbits. Though I was still hoping that Clarabelle and Regan would soon come and join me, I was enjoying watching my fellow classmates.
I was surprised that I recognised some of the surnames that were being called out, names like Gamp, Goldstein and Macmillan; they were probably the children of my parent�s friends, and my family was so extensive that I wouldn�t be shocked to learn that I was related to some of them. Then, one name came up that I definitely did know.
Potter, Lily!
I sat up, curious, and tried to peer round the other, taller, students to get a better look at the girl. She looked just as her mother had looked in the many pictures I had seen of her in the Prophet... I felt in awe.
I couldn't believe it; a Potter, here at Hogwarts and more to the point she was in my own year!
The Potters were famous; I had grown up hearing their name, Harry Potter who had defeated You-Know-Who and saved our world from that dark fiend. I looked round in excitement to see if anyone else shared my enthusiasm, but I was shocked to see that most of them looked impassive, almost as if they did not care.
What was wrong with them? This was a Potter! The daughter of the famous Harry Potter! Why did they not care? I turned back to the front of the hall, where the small girl with reddish brown hair was walking towards the chair where she settled and held her head high as the hat was put onto her head. The hat had barely touched the surface of her hair when it announced her house.
Gryffindor!
I tried hard not to squeal.
After all I had heard and read about Harry Potter, here was his daughter, going to be one of my classmates. I looked around at my fellow housemates... why was nobody more excited about this? Surely they should have been excited to have a Potter sorted into their house.
The girl, Lily, was grinning as she made her way up the aisles and took a seat opposite me. I watched her as she leaned forward and gave someone thumbs up along the table. I followed her gaze and saw a boy with messy black hair return the gesture, along with another boy with russet coloured hair, slightly darker than Lily�s. I realised that they must be her brothers.
That was probably why none of the older students was that fussed with Lily�s arrival; they had seen it all before. Potters were old news among them.
But that didn�t stop me from being excited, and it was with difficulty that I returned my gaze to the Sorting. It was a blow to me when Clarabelle and Regan, my friends from the train, were both sorted into Ravenclaw. I would have to start again making new friends, friends who would share my dormitory and classes, which was something that scared me when I wasn�t surrounded with people I knew and could fall back on. However a strange sensation of butterflies was filling my stomach... perhaps I could be friends with Lily Potter.
Soon, the ceremony was over and the feast had begun. I noticed that us new first years had somehow been clustered in a small group and I was surprised to find that a nice, lively conversation had sprung up between us. It was easy to talk to them, I thought, as easy as talking to my sisters.
�So,� the brown haired boy, whose name I had learned was Tristan, said. �Do you know anyone else here?�
�Yeah,� I answered through mouthfuls of potato. �I�ve got two sisters here already, though they�re in different houses and I got cousins and stuff as well.�
�What about you?� Tristan nodded to Lily across the table, and I felt my stomach threaten to lurch, something that had happened whenever Lily spoke. I had not summoned up the courage to talk to her yet, but I resolved I would try.
�Both my brothers are in Gryffindor,� she said. �I�ve got loads of cousins and stuff around too, too many to mention really.�
�Is Harry Potter really your dad?� I blurted out before I could stop myself.
Instantly, I was horrified at what I had said. What kind of question was that? Lily would think I was really weird now! I felt myself going red and mumbled an apology and averted my eyes to the other students around me. To my great relief they were looking with curiosity at Lily to see how she would answer my question. Evidently the same question had been on their minds, but I was the only one foolish enough to actually go ahead and blurt it out. One foolish point to me, then. I looked up to see how Lily had taken the question.
She was regarding me with a strange expression that I couldn�t quite read, and then, to my horror, she rolled her eyes and I reeled in my utmost stupidity, wishing that I hadn�t asked such a stupid question. She had obviously been asked the same question many times before. But now she was smiling at me in a jokey, friendly way, and I relaxed slightly.
�Yeah,� she said, and I realised that her earlier expression was actually one of pride. �He is.�
�I�m sorry,� I gabbled, my words tumbling over themselves as I rushed to give her the apology I felt she deserved. �I didn�t mean to offend you! I was just curious, I�m really sorry!�
She laughed. �That�s okay. I�m used to the question. My brothers told me to expect it at first,� she reassured me. I still felt stupid for asking my question, but she seemed to be taking it in her stride.
�Must suck having a famous mum and dad, huh?� Tristan said his voice laced with humour and sympathy but in a way that didn�t sound patronising in the least. Lily eyed him a moment before she let out a small musical laugh.
�It does sometimes,� she conceded, her voice thoughtful. �But it�s okay, I can understand it... it�s just curiosity right? I mean, I know I would be interested in me if I was someone else. I mean, how often do you come across someone whose parents have saved the wizarding world?�
She smiled proudly again; it was evident that she thought a lot of her father.
�Did he really do all the things they say he did?� I asked. I was slightly timid, but she seemed to be keeping the conversation open. I also sensed that her pride in her father wouldn�t mind if we kept asking questions.
�Well, that depends what you�ve heard,� she said. �Some stories are true, but loads are just a load of rat droppings.�
�Did he really lead an army of Goblins into Gringotts to take back control of the bank from the Death Eaters?� Tristan asked with wide eyes.
�No!� Lily erupted into peals of laughter. �No, that�s not true. He did go into Gringotts, but it was with only one Goblin, and they were disguised as other people.�
�Why did they go into Gringotts?� we were all staring at her with looks of intense curiosity, thrilled that we were getting inside information on one of the most famous people in our world.
�To steal something that would help to destroy Voldemort.�
�So he really did kill him then?� a small pale blonde girl on Lily�s left asked.
�I heard that he killed himself,� the boy sat next Tristan said in a thick Scottish accent. His name, I remembered, was Murray.
�I thought he tried to kill Harry but they both got knocked unconscious and Harry killed him with his mind while they were unconscious!�
The stories were getting wilder and wilder, and Lily seemed to find it all very funny, so at least we were keeping her entertained with our silly ideas. To be honest, some of them were entertaining me they were that ridiculous, and differed so much from the stories I had grown up with. We began to recall the most ridiculous stories we had ever heard about Harry Potter to make ourselves laugh, and the theory that Harry had won the war against Voldemort using a combination of Augreys, bogies and the Furnunculus curse had us collapsing in fits of uncontrollable laughter for several minutes.
�That�s the stupidest theory I�ve ever heard!� Lily exclaimed, wiping tears from her eyes.
�So how did he really kill him?� I asked, calming down slightly. �Seeing as Voldemort didn�t end up with bogies flapping in his face?
Lily gave a snort of laughter before answering. �They shot spells at the same time, and Voldemort�s backfired on himself, and he died. So technically, he did kill himself,� Lily told us.
�That�s really boring compared to some of the stories!� a brown haired girl who was a Muggle-born named Olivia Smith said. She had never heard of Harry Potter or any of the things that he had done, which I found remarkable, and had enjoyed being filled in with all the ridiculous stories and theories surrounding him.
�Dad says it�s always like that,� Lily told her. �The stories are always more interesting than the reality.�
�But didn�t he do loads of stuff before that?� I asked.
�Yeah, like the Triwizard Tournament! My Dad told me about that!� a sandy haired boy piped up from across the table.
�And didn�t he use a magic sword to kill a Basilisk?�
�And he saved the Philosopher�s Stone from Voldemort!�
�And drove a flying car to Hogwarts once, instead of getting the train!�
�Yeah, he did all those things,� Lily said, pride shining through every syllable. �My Aunt and Uncle helped him, though, it wasn�t just him.�
�Is that Ron and Hermione Weasley?� I asked. They were a married couple, almost as famous as Harry himself.
�Yeah, that�s right. Uncle Ron and Auntie Hermione are his best friends.�
�Wow.�
We blew a collective sigh of admiration, and it seemed that the subject of Lily�s famous relatives was nearly exhausted. As if on cue, the puddings arrived, and there was a lull in conversation as we dived for what looked the most appealing. After a while, a small babble of talk broke about what magic we were most looking forward to, and I found myself talking more and more to Lily. She was very nice, if rather playful, which explained the eye roll she had given me earlier, though she seemed to have forgotten the incident, and it was with her that I walked with up to our new dormitory. We were rather full and sluggish then, so the conversation wasn�t lively as it had been earlier.
�I can�t wait for my bed,� she said, yawning widely. �The house elves warm the sheets for you.�
�I know,� I said grinning at the thought. �My sister told me.�
�Oh, yeah, I forgot you have sisters here. I think it�s very handy, the fact that we sort of know what�s coming,� she said. �I wouldn�t like to come here not knowing about anything.�
�Mmm,� I mumbled in agreement. We had reached the entrance to the Gryffindor common rooms and dormitories, which was covered with a painting of a very fat yet elegant looking lady. This was something that I didn�t know anything about, however, with my sisters being in different houses. My parents too had been Ravenclaws, so I knew little about the space concealed within. I was almost too sleepy to take in the grandeur of the room; the red and gold wall hangings and tapestries, the tables and chair grouped in the corners, the sofas and armchairs clustered around the roaring fire; it all seemed very comfortable and homely.
Our first year dormitory was at the top of a set of spiral stairs. It was a circular room with five four poster beds and our trunks at the foot of each. I extracted my pyjamas from my trunk and clambered into my bed. It was, as Lily had guessed, warm, and incredibly comfortable. I bade everyone goodnight, and drew the hangings around my bed. The pillow was stuffed full of feathers and my head sank into it like a cloud. My eyelids drooped as I thought I heard Lily asking me something about treacle tart, but it could have been my imagination.
She was very nice, I had decided. Perhaps we could go on to be great friends.
Shine a Light by Sapphire at Dawn
Story Notes:
I would like to say a huge thank you to my beta, Gina/gene24 who has been an amazing help with this story. This story is based on a book I read recently called 'Mariana' by Susanna Kearsley. Anything you recognise belongs to either her or JKR.
Chapter Notes: Thanks to Gina/gene24 for beta'ing this. The poem at the beginning is part of 'Maybe' by Kirsten Burgh.
Chapter Endnotes: Thank you for reading, please leave a review and let me know your thoughts!