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Anyway by armagod679

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George knelt beside the grave, feeling nothing but cold and empty. Half of him was gone, just like that. Without a word, without a thought, without a chance to say goodbye.

Fred... of all the people at Hogwarts that night, why him? Why had Fred died? How could Fred die? And how could George go on without him? There was no George without Fred. There could never be George without Fred.

They had done everything together. Everything. They never even had to use words to plan, they never needed anything beyond a look. They worked so much as part of each other that one alone would never be able to go on alone. There was never just Fred or just George. There was only Fred and George, the twins. There was no way they could be separated. They had never even considered the possibility of being apart for more than a few hours, and now they were parted forever.

“George?” George looked up to see Sirius standing over him, looking at the new grave. George wasn’t even surprised to see Sirius at the moment. In fact, George didn’t even care that a man who had been dead for two years was standing over him. After all, this was a cemetery.

“What?” George grunted. Nothing anyone had said so far had made him feel any better.

“I wonder if I could talk to you for a moment,” Sirius answered calmly. George gave a noncommittal grunt in reply, which Sirius seemed to take as assent. He settled himself into the grass beside George. Sirius took a deep breath and began. “Look, I know... I know how you feel right now.”

“No, you don’t,” George said. “You can’t know what it is to have half of you ripped away like this.”

“But I do,” Sirius answered. He did not allow George to phase him. “It happened to me, too, when... when James was killed. It was like... like my soul was cut in half. We may not have been twins, but we were close...”

George looked away. He had already heard various people give speeches like this. Granted, many of them had never been as close to anyone as he had been to Fred, but he didn’t need to hear another speech about pity and understanding.

Sirius studied him carefully. “You know, you and Fred always reminded me of myself and James. Mischievous, reckless, carefree, attractive... and so close that nothing could break us. James and I... we laughed at the possibility of being apart, we didn’t even consider death... we were too young and full of life to ever die... we didn’t make any effort to cheat death because we thought it couldn’t get to us.”

George nodded in spite of himself. Sirius was right, it was as though the story had been written twice. George reluctantly admitted to himself that Sirius was probably the only person who even came close to understanding.

“But then it happened,” Sirius continued. “James was gone, and I was left alone. It’s easier to break someone when they’re alone, you know. I knew that perfectly well, and I did my best not to be broken. I wouldn’t let anything break me, not even Azkaban. And then, after I got out... I realized that I may not have been broken, but I was still incomplete. But you know, after awhile, I realized that, even though I was empty, even though a vital part of my existence was physically gone, I was still alive. I went on anyway. That’s got to count for something, doesn’t it? That you survived anyway?”

“But I don’t want to,” George said. “I don’t want to go on without him. I mean, you... you knew who killed James, who to blame for it, you could go after him and get revenge. Fred was crushed by a part of the castle wall, no one knows who destroyed it, it could have been anyone, really... Sirius, surviving anyway isn’t enough for me. I didn’t intend to survive without him.”

“Maybe not,” Sirius answered. “But you have. Now you need to decide what you’re going to do about it.”

“What do you mean?”

“You have two choices, George. Either you can fade away and die and not have to worry anymore, bringing more grief to your friends and family. Or you can hold your head up and smile and laugh as usual and live anyway.” Sirius stood up. “Several times I thought about fading, but what good would that have done? No, as soon as I could, I chose to live. After all, even though James is gone physically, he’s still alive in my soul. I haven’t lost him.” He turned to leave.

“Sirius?” George called after him. Sirius looked back. George hesitated. “Will I be able to forget?”

Sirius looked at him sadly. “No,” Sirius answered. “But that’s what keeps him alive.”

With that, Sirius faded away like a ghost, or an illusion. George couldn’t even be sure if the conversation had been real.

George looked at the grave again. It was rather plain, just the name Fred Weasley and the dates of birth and death. Everyone had agreed that George should choose the epitaph, but he hadn’t had the energy. But now he took out his wand and carved the words into the stone.

Fred Weasley
April 1, 1978- May 2, 1998
When your eyes blink, you won’t lose a friend.


George nodded. “I’m going to live anyway,” he told the grave, hoping his brother could hear him.

He stood up, took one last look at the tombstone, and walked away to do just that.