After the feast was over, I headed up to my bed and fell asleep. The next morning was beautiful. The sun was just peeking over the horizon, and the birds were chirping musically. One thought had been nagging at me all night long. The book I was trying to write during the summer. Well, maybe I’ll keep writing it, and if I still think that it is stupid, I’ll just throw it in the rubbish bin, I thought to myself. So I pulled the book out and the so - called magic ink quill. I had to shake the quill a few times to get the ink flowing and then I began to write.
Professor Slughorn had inexplicably decided to show up for class in only his knickers. And they weren’t your ordinary pair of underpants. They were purple, with pink hearts and had glitter outlining the hearts. Every Gryffindor was laughing hysterically and the Slytherin students didn’t seem to know what to make of the situation. One Slytherin, however, stood up.
–Professor, let me prove my loyalty!†the student said, ripping off his own robes. He was wearing that one pair of knickers that you don’t want anyone to see. The ones that are ten years old, frayed and somehow, you always go to throw them out, but inexplicably you just end up putting them back in the underwear drawer. Everyone has a pair like that. And then, as though this strange display of ‘loyalty’ was the trigger, every male Slytherin got up and stripped down to their knickers. Every Gryffindor was laughing so loudly now, that Dumbledore came down to the Potions room.
–What in the wizarding world is going on?†Dumbledore demanded of us all.
–Sir! Everyone has gone mental! Everyone is stripping down to their underwear!†One Gryffindor student choked out over his laughing while tears streamed down his face.
–I haven’t seen anyone have this much fun in ages! I want in!†Dumbledore shrieked while taking off his robes too.
–Conga line!†Dumbledore shouted above the din. Soon every student was hanging on to someone as they paraded around the room in their underpants.
I shut the book. In my opinion, that was not exactly my best work. I decided to just throw it all into the rubbish bin beside my bed, and go to breakfast. I got dressed, and made my way down to the Great Hall. I ate a hurried breakfast, as I had used most of my time writing.
I barely made it through my classes. Transfiguration was difficult and Care of Magical Creatures was tiring. Lunch was good, though. It was soon time to be going to Potions, so I finished the rest of my lunch. I walked slowly down to the dungeons, and just about fell over when I opened the door. Professor Slughorn was in nothing but his purple and sparkly heart knickers. That is way too strange, I thought to myself. Every Gryffindor was laughing extremely hard and the Slytherin Students seemed confused as to what to do. Before I knew it, though, Jack Livingston stood up.
–Professor, let me prove my loyalty!†Jack shouted as he ripped off his robes, showing just exactly the pair of underwear I had described while writing my book. While I watched in horror, the rest of the male Slytherin students followed Jack’s example and ripped off their own robes. Everyone started to laugh really hard and then Dumbledore himself had come in to see what the ruckus was about.
–What in the wizarding world is going on?†Dumbledore demanded.
–Sir! Everyone has gone mental! Everyone is stripping down to their underwear!†Colin Everheart choked out between laughing, while the tears poured down his face. Okay, this is just getting freaky I thought, thoroughly suspicious.
–I haven’t seen anyone have this much fun in ages! I want in!†Dumbledore shouted as he stripped off his robes. Everyone cheered.
–Conga line!†Dumbledore shouted to the class at large. Everyone was parading around the room in thier underwear, shrieking and shouting with delight.
–Why are we doing this?†Colin shouted.
–I have no idea, but let’s not stop!†Professor Slughorn shouted. I let out a little gasp, and ran out of the room. That was a crazy and accurate coincidence, I thought. A possible explanation occurred to me, and I ran up to my room in the Gryffindor Tower. I flew to the rubbish bin, and pulled out my book. I read it over and determined that the exact thing I had written about had just come to fruition in the dungeons. I looked desperately for the package that my quill came from and found it. I out the title in my head. ‘Magic Ink Quill. Watch As what you write comes alive all around you! This amazing quill works for a full fourty-eight hours after activation. Simply shake twice!’
–Oh my!†I said aloud to myself. I thought about how on earth I had missed reading the package. But wait, I thought. Maybe this is actually not a bad thing. I can make stuff happen. Funny and horrible stuff. I can control all of Hogwarts for a full fourty-eight hours and no one will suspect that this is all of my doing! People have no idea what’s about to happen to them, I thought mischievously. I pulled my book out of the rubbish bin, and began to write:
The beautiful and radiant Lily Evans was having yet another perfect hair day. She looked absolutely gorgeous with her shining red hair and perfect complexion. Every hair was in place, and-
–Hey, watch it, readers want to see funny things happen to people, not hear how perfect you are,†a girl with long brown hair and bright green eyes suddenly appeared and warned me.
"Who the Hufflepuff are you?" I asked apprehensively.
"The author of this wonderful story," the girl said happily.
"I though I was the author?"
"Yes, of the story you're writing,"
"But I thought that the author was J.K Rowling?" I questioned, extremely confused.
"Well, yes, but I'm writing this particular story. It's called fanfiction," she said slowly, as if speaking to someone very dense.
"Isn't that just cheating, though? You didn't make it up," I shot at her.
"No! It is not cheating at all. Just make use of my warning!" the so-called author snapped at me.
–Ugh, fine. Back to the story,†I agreed, feeling that I won that argument.
'Lily Evans was looking beautiful that particular day (there, better?) On a very intuitive whim, Lily decided to sneak into the boys’ dormitory while all of the boys were conveniently either playing Quidditch, or watching the other boys play. Once inside, she found all of James Potter and Sirius Black’s robes and transfigured them into purple bikini tops and green skirts. And for good measure, she filled both of the boy’s shampoo bottles with a potion that changes the user into the first animal they think of after they use it. Snickering to herself, Lily left the room.'
She headed down to the Great Hall for breakfast, and just about lost it when she saw-
–Lily! You have to stop giving away what’s going to happen!†Snidgetgirl shrieked, realizing how much Lily was giving away.
–Um, why?â€
–Because! It’s bad for the sake of the plot and my readership!â€
–And why is that?†I enquired.
–Because,â€
–Because why?â€
–Would you like to read something twice? The poor people who decided to read this will just stop reading because, by you telling every single detail of what will happen, they become disinterested,†the author explained.
–Fair enough,â€
–That’s what I thought,†and with that, our lovely author left the story again.
48 Hours of Power by Snidgetgirl
Chapter Notes: Hello! This chapter is way funnier than the first one (I hope!) so I hope you like reading it as much as I liked writing it!
I'm warning you now that the characters are sort of OOC, but, I mean, this is supposed to be funny, so if you don't like weirdness, I suggest you stop. Oh! and thank you very much to Mr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz. Your 'emotionally scarring backstory' about your underpants really helped this one along :)
Chapter Endnotes: So? Did you like it? Was it funny? Let me know! Just click the magic little box titled 'review'. It's just right underneath this. How much easier could it be? You know you want to!