As Albus’s hands ran through my hair, I couldn’t help but think how long I had wanted this to happen. My hands found themselves under his shirt and on his defined chest. I pushed Albus against the wall, and Albus responded with renewed force. His hands found my neck, and before I knew it, it was me against the wall and he was in control. As his hand continued to wander, I let out an unexpected groan. Eventually, as much as I hated to, I had to pull away. I still had to go to the shops.
–Mm, Al,†I said as I pushed him off. –I really do have to go shopping,†I told him, smiling. –I won’t be long, though.†I couldn’t wipe the smile off my face; I couldn’t believe it was actually happening.
–Do you really have to go?†Al asked, smoothing down his tousled hair.
–Well, we could sit here and eat mustard,†I replied. –And I’m out of tea, thanks to you and your hangover.â€
–Then why don’t we go together? I think I remember where it is …†Albus offered, and I couldn’t help but smile.
–Somehow, I don’t think shopping when you’re hungover is your brightest idea. You were horrible under normal circumstances. You’re not the most patient person …†I reminded him, and Albus laughed.
–You’re right. Shopping gives me a headache as it is,†he admitted. –See you soon.â€
So I set off, turning up the collar of my coat at the spring rain. As I walked, all the thoughts that had been lost in the moment crashed on me in an instant. What was going to happen? Were we still friends … or something more? If we were more than friends, what could I tell Lily?
At the shops, I hurriedly bought what I needed and a few things I knew Albus would want. I’d shared the flat with him before, after all. But I couldn’t stop the sinking feeling in my stomach: that I would go back and Albus would say that it was all a mistake, and then he’d disappear again. If anything would be worse than breaking up with Albus, it would be losing him entirely before we’d even been in a relationship.
So when I got back to the flat, I just quietly started putting away the food. Beer in the fridge, teabags in the second cupboard to the right. Lettuce, fridge. Biscuits, left cupboard. So on and so forth. It was good to have a mundane task to do. I didn’t notice when Albus entered the room.
–Stop worrying. We don’t even know what this is yet,†he said, and our lips met once more. It was just as exhilarating as the first time, and all my other thoughts disappeared. When we pulled apart, my doubts returned.
–What is this?†I asked, and Albus shrugged. –So … are we together now, or something?†My face was creased as I stumbled over the words, but Albus looked as calm as ever.
–I don’t know,†he replied honestly, biting his lip. I felt the fear take over; after my declaration, I had no idea what Albus felt. He kissed me, but did it mean anything?
–Well, er,†I said, finding a blush creep up in my cheeks. I looked like a complete arse; I had declared my love for him! As if he could see me struggling, Albus touched my cheek. I looked at him, trying to keep the pain out of my eyes. I saw him smile.
–I suppose we are,†he replied. It was then that my doubts faded as the grey area cleared. I kissed his ear, not able to keep the grin off my face. But then there was Lily. I didn’t know how long I could lie to her, so I supposed I just had to hope that Al might be ready to reappear soon.
I noticed Al’s tousled hair was slightly damp, and I could smell his aftershave. It was intoxicating. I recognized the scent; it was the same kind he had used when he worked at the Ministry.
–When do you have to be at work next?†Albus asked, and I had to think for a minute.
–Well, it depends. Your sister, who was, incidentally, here last night, thinks I should quit my job at the bar, which would mean Monday. Otherwise, tonight at around seven. You?†I replied, and Al’s face paled.
–She came here?†he asked worriedly.
–Don’t worry. It’s the fourth time in the five years I’ve lived here it’s happened. And it was because she thought I’d vanished,†I assured him, and Albus relaxed.
–Why did she think you should quit your job?†he asked, and I sighed. –Apart from the obvious signs of exhaustion …â€
–That was actually it. She didn’t think it was healthy,†I said, and Al nodded.
–Knowing how early you get to work, I estimate you haven’t had more than four hours of sleep a night. Definitely not healthy. You should listen to her. With the now split rent, you won’t need the extra money, and I honestly don’t know if I could date another bartender,†Al advised, smiling at his last comment.
–So you are staying?†I asked, and Albus just nodded. –To answer your question, then, Monday,†I told him, and Albus smiled. –When do you have to go in next?â€
–The same,†Albus answered. We had the entire weekend to ourselves. –But I probably should move out of my flat …†I had forgotten about that.
–I’ll help. Want to get it over with now?†I asked, and Albus sighed.
–Why not? I’ll pay my final rent on the place and be done with it,†he agreed, before Disapparating with a crack. I immediately followed. I was quite curious to see his hated flat.
When I arrived, I could see why. Its yellowing walls were peeling, and I could cast aguamenti in the middle of the flat and hit every corner of it. There was an old, lumpy, patched sofa in the living room, and in the tiny bedroom, I could see a mattress lying on the floor. There were a few things here and there, with what must have been fifty books, but it didn’t look like someone lived there.
–I bought this right after I left,†Al said, looking embarrassed.
–It’s okay. You don’t need to explain to me,†I told him, and he smiled. It was another genuine one. I came to the conclusion he’d smiled more today than in the fifteen years I’d known him.
–So, do you happen to have a box handy?†Al asked, and I shook my head.
–Just Transfigure something you don’t want into one, and then place an Undetectable Extension Charm on it,†I told him. Albus thought for a minute before he waved his wand at a rather ugly lamp. And with another wave, we were ready to move him out.
–I can’t believe I never thought of that,†I heard Albus mutter to himself. Typical Al. He might be a genius, but his common sense skills weren’t the best. Laughing to myself, I started putting things in the box, until Albus’s lips met mine once more, his hands finding my hair. He pushed me against the wall, and it continued.
I was pretty sure I verbally sighed as I had to push Albus off once more. I hated doing it, but if we were going to actually finish unpacking the box, having got back to my-our-place, we couldn’t keep kissing. No matter how much I wanted to.
–You’re right,†Albus said, brushing himself off and reaching into the damned box once more. Albus was confusing normally, but now, in whatever relationship this was, it was even worse. There would be moments when he would just crash his lips onto mine, but immediately after he’d go back to the same calculative, slightly detached, state he was normally in.
Finally, after a few disagreements and a lot of kissing, all of Albus’s things had found a place. Even more books were stuffed on his already full bookshelf, and the sofa had been Transfigured by Albus into a nicer one. It seemed it had completely slipped Albus’s mind he could fix almost anything with magic.
Which is why, as Albus and I collapsed onto separate sofas, I ended up swearing profusely.
–What is it?†Albus asked, and I shook my head.
–I have to go and quit my job. I was supposed to be there an hour ago. This’ll be interesting,†I told him, and Al laughed.
–Just come back quick, all right?†he told me, before standing up and giving me a peck on the cheek.
–Fine,†I conceded, and Disapparated with a crack.
It was actually much easier than I thought. The bloke was nice about it; he told me it was fine, and that he was going to have to let someone go soon anyway. Then, thinking I should probably tell Lily, to stop her from worrying, I Apparated to her flat.
I knocked, and after a few seconds, Lily was at the door. She looked surprised to see me and was wearing a rather pretty floral-printed dress.
–If it’s a bad time,†I started, but Lily immediately waved it off. Louis was sitting in the living area, looking rather smart.
–Nah, it’s perfect timing. Gives us a reason to be late to Rosie’s engagement party,†she told me, grinning mischievously. Louis chuckled, and Lily straightened his tie. –Please tell me you quit that pub job,†she told me, frowning.
–Yes, I did. About five minutes ago, actually,†I told her, and I couldn’t keep the smile off my face.
–Someone’s happy,†Lily commented, giving me a sly look. I blushed. Lily giggled. –You’ve kissed someone!â€
–Shut it,†I told her, knowing a blush was creeping up into my cheeks.
–Who was it?†she asked, her smile as wide as the moon. Louis was smiling, too, looking at the point of laughter as he watched his girlfriend bounce up and down like one of the children she taught.
–No one,†I told her, and she frowned. After staring at me for a while, she just shrugged.
–You’ll tell me eventually,†she settled with, before standing up. –And you can’t keep him waiting. Get out of here, Scorpius!†Lily exclaimed, the small red ringlet that wasn’t in her bun bouncing as she did.
I laughed and did as she said, but not before pulling her into a hug. –Good luck with Rose’s party,†I murmured. It was Lily’s turn to laugh.
–We’ll need it.†And with that, I disappeared, before reappearing in Albus and my flat. Seeing that I was smiling, Albus’s stressed face immediately relaxed, and he brushed my hair back. I felt electricity spark from the simple gesture, and Al’s hand lingered near my face. Until it found my neck.
What inevitably followed was pure bliss. It was perfection.
The next four months passed in a frenzied mess of work, worrying, and Albus. Al was perfect; I could tell he was almost ready to come back. But I didn’t want to ask him. I didn’t want to ruin it. The kisses on my neck after a long day, when I least expected it, the laughter, the feeling I got every time I saw him.
Albus was what was holding me together. Since the first day, it was my whispered ‘I love you’ every night that made the day a little brighter. When he returned the words, after three months, it made my heart soar. The rest of my life, however, was slowly falling down around me. Mum was getting worse every day; the Healers told me there wasn’t much time left. Lily was getting worried; she wanted to meet my ‘boyfriend’, and things weren’t going well with her family. Except Dominique and James, Lucy and Rose’s whispered insults seemed to indicate that the family thought Lily and Louis needed to break up. In my opinion, I think that, initially, they had thought it was just a phase. Lily and Louis were still going strong, though, but it was wearing them down. There were many times when I’d go over there and find Lily crying.
And she kept pressing me about my mystery boyfriend. I wanted so badly to tell her that it was Albus, because she had almost given up on him, too. She was slowly being crushed. I just wanted to take that weight off of her, and Albus was another person who agreed with Louis and Lily.
I should have known it would have come crashing down. After all, there was no happily ever after. There never was.